The Human From a Dungeon

Nick Smith

Adventurer Level: 11

Human – American

"So, how hard was that boss when you and Nash fought it?" I asked Yulk as we watched Garin and his crew pick over the giant scorpion's corpse.

"It was quite difficult, at first. Neither my spells nor his weapons were all that good at penetrating armor," Yulk replied with a chuckle. "Nash ended up using the back of his axe as a bludgeon to crack its armor, which allowed me to get a lucky shot in with a wind spear."

"Oh, you're the one who killed the boss?"

He laughed.

"That's certainly how I told it when we got back, but that was to annoy Nash by downplaying his involvement. If I'm being completely honest, I simply wouldn't have been able to kill the boss on my own. I just stood there being useless until the cracks in its armor began to form. But Nash stood toe to toe with it without even blinking. I have no doubt that he would have killed the boss on his own if I hadn't intervened. All I did was finish it off."

"Oh, we have a word for that," I grinned. "Kill-stealing."

"That's two words," Larie pointed out.

"I... Well, yeah, I guess, but it's said as one word," I said with a shrug.

"I see," Larie tapped his chin. "Also, I mean no offense, but it's somewhat concerning that it's a common enough occurrence for your people to be worthy of a short-hand phrase. You must be at war pretty frequently."

"Well..." I trailed off, remember a stat about how it was easier to count the years that my country had been at peace. "Um... The cause for the phrase is actually because of an invention called video games."

I quickly explained to Yulk and Larie the concept of electronic video games and how popular they were. Larie pointed out that their popularity could be a sign of humanity's violent tendencies, but Yulk argued that using them might actually lessen violent tendencies. I did my best to avoid being dragged into the debate that I'd grown up hearing as I watched the adventurer's finish their looting.

"Alright, we're ready to move on," Garin said. "Whatcha talkin' about?"

"Nothing much," I said quickly, desperately wanting the conversation to end. "Let's get moving."

Yulk and Larie gave me a curious look as we began to walk, but then they must have remembered what they had been talking about. Despite his lack of features, it was easy to tell how embarrassed Larie was. Yulk was equally embarrassed at his social faux pas, though it took him a bit longer to get there.

The corridor after the boss chamber was much nicer than the previous one had been. There were no signs of bugs, their homes, or any sort of plant-life, but it looked the same as the dungeon's entrance. It occurred to me that asking about what we would be facing would be pointless, but then we spotted a stark difference from the rest of the dungeon.

A turn.

"Awesome," Garin said with a smile.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Goblins," Yulk answered.

"Yep, the only part of the dungeon that has any sort of turns in it belongs to the goblins," Garin said. "They aren't all that strong, and they aren't nearly as numerous as the bugs. They are somewhat intelligent, though, so we need to keep an eye out for traps."

"The boss is just a big goblin with some little goblins as back-up," Nifth said.

"Just a big goblin?" I asked. "Wait, so can't I just..."

I trailed off as the implications hit me.

"Kill it with one spell?" Yulk asked with a laugh. "Yes. Most mages can. The goblins are usually the second or third portion of the dungeon."

"Oh," I said, feeling dumb.

"The only real danger they pose is the traps," Nifth added. "Most of them aren't hard to spot because you can see them pretty easily, but we'll want to be careful with the turns. Those can hide a variety of nasty, and lethal, surprises."

"They also coat their weapons with toxins," Dosten said.

"The traps, too."

"Yep. So you just gotta avoid getting slashed or stabbed by the little fuckers," Garin laughed. "They aren't that fast, strong, or skilled, so it's pretty easy. A nice vacation after the bots and bugs."

'Is it just me, or do terrible things happen once someone says things will be easy?' Ten asked.

'You're only just noticing?' I replied silently.

As I internally hoped that Ten was wrong, we approached the turn and spotted a thin wire. Garin triggered the trap with his hammer, and a wooden board came flying around the corner with a sharp, snapping noise. Rusted arrowheads and spear-tips had been shoved through the board, turning it into a sort of spiked wall.

"See?" Nifth said with an air of smugness. "This one's the hardest to spot, and I'd bet it's the sole reason for any injuries or deaths in this part of the dungeon."

"You'd lose your coin," Yulk replied. "The boss may not do well against ranged attacks, but it isn't weak to melee. It's killed many a careless adventurer."

"So we won't engage it in melee," I said. "We'll use the same tactic as with the robot boss, except I won't have to go running in."

Before anyone could voice their agreement with me, we heard the pattering of bare feet on stone floor. I drew my sword with a sigh, wishing we had taken the opportunity to grab a little more rest. It felt like I could sleep for a whole week.

"Oh, and the traps usually alert nearby squads," Nifth chuckled, readying his bow.

"You don't say," I said as I slid past the board, carefully avoiding the sharp bits.

Garin and the rest followed suit, and we began walking toward the noise in our familiar formation, ready for a fight. The goblins came into view, and an arrow whizzed past me. The lead goblin's nose was replaced with a shaft, and the rest screamed in rage and began to sprint toward us.

I leapt forward and slashed the neck of one goblin, then kicked another in the gut hard enough to make it drop its dagger. A spear jabbed at my face, but slowly enough that I was able to simply tilt my head to avoid it. I grabbed the spear, stabbed the doubled-over goblin, then pulled the spear, forcing its user into my sword.

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Three goblins laid dead or dying at my feet as I took a look around. Garin had two extremely deceased goblins around him, in a condition which viscerally reminded me of the bugs. The four remaining goblins took a step back and prepared to throw their spears, but were instantly annihilated by one arrow, two wind spears, and a bolt of lightning.

"Is that all of 'em?" Garin asked.

"Yep," I answered.

I pulled a very soiled cloth out of my pocket and tried to wipe the blood off of my sword. It was too dirty to get the blade clean, but I noticed that one of the goblins had a somewhat-clean cloth tied around its mottled-brown arm. I replaced my soiled cloth with the clean one and finished wiping down my sword.

"Hmm, looks like the first few groups are pretty much loot-less, same as if this area had appeared near the entrance," Dosten said, rubbing his chin.

"What kind of loot do they have?" I asked.

"The goblins further in have better equipment, and sometimes they even have clothes. Clothes with pockets, in which they keep shiny objects."

"Coins and gems," Garin said with a stretch. "Nothing worth more than a silver, though."

"What did you loot from the scorpion?" I asked.

"Some blood and venom. If we weren't going deeper, we'd have tried to take its stinger, claws, or even just some of its armor with us."

As we continued on, Garin explained the various intricacies of looting the dungeon. Some monsters had valuable body parts or byproducts, others carried valuables with them. There were also treasures that appeared in the form of chests, but those were rare and went pretty fast.

Parties didn't usually go much further than one boss because getting weighed down with valuables was easy, and having to leave stuff behind to grab something more valuable was hard. It either meant letting someone else profit off of your work, or having the stuff disappear with the corpses.

"So the monster corpses just disappear?" I asked.

"Yeah, and if you don't have their stuff on you when it happens, the stuff disappears as well," Garin said.

"What happens when you take off your pack for the night?"

"In your pack counts as on you, even if your pack is on the floor. Unless you're really far away."

"What happens then?"

"The items in the packs will disappear along with the monster corpses, and the packs will disappear along with the next teleportation," Yulk said. "So will the bodies of any unfortunate adventurers. Usually..."

"Ah," I said.

Memories of the remains of Nash's former party leapt to mind. A chill ran down my spine as I also recalled the condition in which we found those remains...

"Usually?" Dosten asked. "When don't they disappear?"

"There are certain areas within the dungeon that appear to be exempt from the spatial distortion," Yulk explained. "Well, actually, we only know of one thus far. The area in which my brother found Nick, and in which his party was slain."

"Oh, shit, I heard about that," Nifth said, sympathetically, then turned to me. "Wait, so The Hidden Chamber of Horrors was where you were found?"

"I didn't know it was called that, but yeah," I replied.

"Damn, that's gotta be rough. I heard that monster was terrifying. But you were aslee- Oh, hold on, look," Nifth stopped and pointed at the ceiling in front of us.

We came to a halt and stared at the net full of rocks hanging loosely between the light stones. There was a less obvious tripwire rigged to it that led to the floor. Garin sighed and triggered the wire, causing the rocks to tumble to the ground.

A moment later, we heard more goblins approaching. We waited for them, and made them try to step over the rocks to get to us. There were only five, and they were dealt with very quickly. Garin got one, I got two, Nifth got one, and a lightning spell took out the last one.

Like other parts of the dungeon, this repetition became the norm. We would find a trap, trigger it, and ambush the goblins who came to check on it. The goblins weren't able to put up much of a fight, but looting took up the time we would have otherwise saved.

Once we noticed the corridor expanding, we took a rest and prepared to fight the boss. By then, I was tired enough to sleep like a log. We woke up, ate, and continued on to the boss.

The boss really was just a big goblin. Instead of a dagger, though, he had a sword and shield and was accompanied by ten henchmen. Once they saw us, the little goblins rushed toward us and the big one hid behind his shield.

That didn't help him, though.

"Tellub leets tsac!"

A hole appeared in the boss' shield and he tumbled to the ground as the smaller goblins reached us. A few moments later, it was all over. The adventurers picked over the corpses, and then we were ready to move on.

"Let's go see what's next," I said with a satisfied grin.

Master Vampire Kirain Yith

Adventurer Level: N/A

Drow Master Vampire - Balushenian

I stood upon the castle's balcony and surveyed the scene in the courtyard. Daemons and thralls dragged prisoners around, whilst the brood were busy consuming the casualties. Turning my attention away from that grim sight, I marveled at how little damage we had done to the architecture.

The gaping hole that the orcs had left in the wall had been patched with wood instead of stone. It had allowed us to smash our way into the capital with little to no collateral damage. From there, things had been relatively simple.

The drow had been joined in battle by the orcs, but neither had been prepared to counter an invasion. As such, their will had broken quite quickly. Hirgarus had let them flee, and I had not protested.

"Greetings, King Kirain," his voice rumbled from behind me. "How does this evening find you?"

I turned to face him, a sudden coldness gripping my heart. His greeting had reminded me that I'd finally become king of the Night Kingdom, but the victory tasted bitter. I wondered if he knew that, and meant for his greeting to sting.

"I am well, Hirgarus," I smiled, hiding my feelings. "What brings you to me?"

"I came to inform you that we will soon depart. We've confirmed the victory and ensured your ability to maintain control of the area, as agreed. The surrounding lands are still controlled by the Unified Chiefdoms, but Marquess Naberius made it quite clear that it's your responsibility to change that."

That annoyed me, but it was technically fair. The Marquess had promised to help me take the Night Kingdom, and that he had. Or his lackeys had, I suppose.

The Marquess was busy elsewhere.

"I see," I said. "Do you have any recommendations on how I would go about doing that?"

"Yes. The previous ruler had heavily taxed and levied the north to support the invasion and subsequent defense to the south. As such, even after the invasion the northern territories are weak and the southern territories are fortified. If it were me, I would use the northern population to bolster my forces, then take the lands to the east and west. Finally, I would assault the south until the enemy was driven back."

"I don't believe that I could bolster my forces with those in the north. Drow cannot be made into vampires without sacrificial wylder."

"No, but they can be beaten into submission and drafted. They will make good fodder for the enemy arrows, and fighting their own people will have a psychological impact on both sides."

I nodded, impressed with how thorough his tactical analysis was. Truth be told, I hadn't even given it much thought. My focus had been on whether or not I should put a dagger in the daemon's backs.

The higher one had claimed that becoming king was an empty pursuit. Loathe as I was to admit it, the bitter taste of my supposed victory forced me to concede the point. I knew in my heart that its claims regarding the fate of my new kingdom were true, as well.

So too, then, would be its claim for how I could redeem myself. I would either betray the daemons and die, or obey them and continue on with the bitterness of life. The higher one's warning about when I should begin my betrayal was also on my mind.

I could probably think about it for a while longer, but it was unlikely that taking the rest of the Night Kingdom would lead me to redemption. Even if I were to accomplish such a feat in record time, the daemons would likely become too entrenched for my betrayal to matter. So the only real thing to think about was where to stick the dagger, as it were.

"Where is your next destination?" I asked casually.

"We intend to take the town that we previously ignored. It won't be much longer before the villages we emptied are noticed and their defenses are engorged."

"Why take the town in the first place? Surely there are more strategically vital areas to conquer."

"Not for us. The town sits on the border of Calkuti and the Unified Chiefdoms. The surrounding terrain will force the orcs to march through it to join the empire in fighting our other forces."

"Ah, an ambush, then?"

"Precisely."

"And what's to stop them from attacking my kingdom instead of marching west?" I asked, moving to the map table. "Since the survivors were allowed to flee, the orcs will be notified of my incursion soon enough."

"They've already been notified of the assaults on Bolisir and Calkuti. They may muster a small force to send against you, but the majority of their armies will prepare to march to their neighbor's aid."

I stared at Hirgarus for a moment, trying not to display my disbelief. He didn't seem to know how stubborn the dwarves and elves were. They would certainly notify the Unified Chiefdoms of the invasion, but they would not ask for aid unless it was completely necessary. And it would be considered disrespectful if the orcs supplied that aid without being asked.

The daemons were formidable and had the element of surprise, but there was no chance that they had been able to inflict enough damage to force a cry for help from either Calkuti or Bolisir. My mind settled, realizing that betrayal was now the only real course of action that I could take. If I had simply ignored the higher one and marched to the north, we'd have been caught unprepared by the full force of the Unified Chiefdoms to our rear.

"What's the name of the town you intend to take?" I asked, trying to find it on the map.

"It's here," he said, walking to the table.

He pointed at the map, and my eyebrow rose despite my attempt at stoicism. The name was familiar to me.

"It's called Talokam," he said.