Who Stole My Eggs?

At the crack of dawn, Huo Yao walked toward Imperial Teacher Wen’s courtyard with Xie Zuo piggybacking on him.

Xie Zuo, rudely roused from sleep, was still seething with anger. Lying on Huo Yao’s back with his eyes shut, he threatened to unleash his frustration, “…I swear, I’ll bite that old man’s head off sooner or later!”

“No eating people,” Huo Yao warned.

Xie Zuo swatted him, “Shut it, don’t spoil the mood!”

After a moment of silence, Huo Yao remarked, “Imperial Teacher Wen is old. The meat must be tough and stale. He wouldn’t taste good.”

Xie Zuo: …The Great Thunder Deity was unexpectedly humorous. It was a bit unsettling!

Imperial Teacher Wen swung open the courtyard door and was pleased to find Xie Zuo waiting outside. “Let’s go in together.”

With the early light casting a dim glow, Imperial Teacher Wen’s vision wasn’t at its best. Mistaking the person standing beside Xie Zuo for Mu Rong, he entered the room. Upon seeing the figure following Xie Zuo—a head taller and much stronger—it could only be General Huo.

“General, why are you…?” Imperial Teacher Wen asked tentatively.

Huo Yao gave a respectful salute and explained, “I intend to accompany His Highness when he welcomes his bride next month. Given my busy schedule, I’m here to study wedding etiquette with His Highness.”

Imperial Teacher Wen wanted to inquire further: ‘How come a general have studying marriage etiquette from the Imperial Teacher? He is not yet married, why learn it?’

But out of concern for the general’s reputation, Imperial Teacher Wen chose to remain silent, nodding kindly and praising, “The general is always considerate.”

Watching their pretense, Xie Zuo yawned in boredom.

His gaping mouth caught Imperial Teacher Wen’s eye, and the old man was appalled, “How can a prince behave so indecently!”

Xie Zuo blinked, his dry eyes burning with determination to bite Imperial Teacher Wen’s head off—again!

Imperial Teacher Wen was fervent in his teaching, particularly as this pertained to the etiquette guide for the prince’s wedding.

For several days, Xie Zuo endured early mornings and late nights to learn wedding etiquette. He had to perform eight hundred bows to his imaginary bride, people, and elders each day, until his waist felt near breaking.

Finally, Imperial Teacher Wen deemed it sufficient and asked Xie Zuo to run through the entire process.

“Oh, got it,” Xie Zuo grumbled, thoroughly fed up with the ordeal.

Contemplating seriously, Imperial Teacher Wen mused, “I need to find you a practice partner. Why not call on Mu…”

“I’ll do it,” Huo Yao interjected, having observed silently without interruption, offering himself as a candidate.

Imperial Teacher Wen was taken aback, “You?”

Huo Yao replied calmly, “I’ve been watching and studying these past few days, so I’m already familiar with the proceedings.”

Imperial Teacher Wen hinted subtly, “If you’re practicing with His Highness, the general should stand in for Princess Lin.”

“Understood.”

Imperial Teacher Wen watched as the courageous and adept General Huo stood beside Xie Zuo, obediently bowing his head as Xie Zuo covered him with a red veil.

Xie Zuo burst into laughter, “Hahahahahaha!”

Imperial Teacher Wen sighed, feeling that sooner or later, he, the prince’s tutor, would be finished by General Huo.

But… Imperial Teacher Wen scrutinized the two standing together, slowly stroking his beard. He couldn’t shake the feeling that something was amiss.

Huo Yao had spoken the truth. He cooperated seamlessly throughout the practice, showing familiarity with every aspect of the intricate and lengthy wedding ceremony.

As Imperial Teacher Wen observed their practice, he nodded while feeling a sense of unease, unable to pinpoint what was wrong.

.

Meanwhile, Mu Rong, standing by, knew everything but dared not speak up. He could only gaze at the sky with a heavy heart.

That night, Xie Zuo was finally free from Imperial Teacher Wen’s tutelage. Like a bird released from its cage, he eagerly suggested taking Huo Yao and Mu Rong for a stroll.

Unexpectedly, Mu Rong declined. Xie Zuo, insistent, grabbed his shoulders and dragged him out.

Mu Rong reluctantly held hands with Xie Zuo, while Huo Yao followed silently behind.

Feeling like a burden on his back, Mu Rong attempted to shake Xie Zuo off several times to no avail.

Xie Zuo quipped, “Do you have lice on your back? Why are you squirming?”

Depressed, Mu Rong replied, “Don’t cling to me. I’m too hot. Go cling to General Huo.”

Xie Zuo glanced at Huo Yao but hugged Mu Rong tighter, not wanting to touch that man. Lately, Huo Yao had been eager to try out the ointment on him, so Xie Zuo wanted to avoid any trouble.

Huo Yao’s imposing presence was too overwhelming. Xie Zuo felt that his human body couldn’t handle it, so he had been avoiding him recently.

The town they settled in was one of the largest and most bustling cities in the Yunzhao Kingdom, situated close to the imperial city. It boasted a diverse array of cuisine and even featured a night market, something Xie Zuo had been eager to explore.

As soon as they entered the market, Huo Yao purchased a pack of shortbread cookies for Xie Zuo and encouraged him to eat while they walked.

Xie Zuo naturally released Mu Rong, and Huo Yao smoothly maneuvered to be close to him.

It wasn’t until Xie Zuo noticed someone missing that he realized Mu Rong had been swallowed up by the crowd.

“Where’s Mu Rong?” Xie Zuo glanced around with a mouthful of cookie crumbs.

Huo Yao embraced him, wiped his greasy lips with his fingers, then leaned in for a firm kiss. “Forget about him, come with me.”

Xie Zuo was taken aback by the public display of affection, teasing, “Are you trying to seduce me here?”

Huo Yao replied, but his words were lost in the sudden eruption of cheers from the crowd ahead.

Xie Zuo, always drawn to commotion, brushed off the kiss and urged Huo Yao forward, inadvertently annoying those around them.

“Why are you squeezing in?”

“You’re blocking the way!”

However, when Huo Yao glanced at them, the complaints ceased.

“Sorry,” Huo Yao apologized, instantly dispersing the crowd.

.

With no obstructions, Xie Zuo spotted the source of the excitement—a wounded demon lying in the center of the throng.

The demon, naked and towering, sported disheveled hair resembling dead grass, with two pointed horns protruding from its head and a scaly tail swaying behind.

A thick chain fastened around its neck, held by a Taoist priest with a sharp wit and monkey-like features. Nearby, a young Taoist boy circled, collecting coins in a large dustpan.

“Let’s teach this demon a lesson, Master Gou Tian! Show it our might!” someone in the crowd cheered.

“Consider it done!” Master Gou Tian tightened the chain, eliciting groans from the demon. With a swift incantation, he ignited the creature’s hair.

Amidst laughter from the crowd, the demon writhed in agony, trying to extinguish the flames.

The young Taoist boy resumed his money-collecting rounds, coins showering into his dustpan.

Suddenly, a gush of water materialized, dousing the flames and the demon’s humiliation.