The Married Life Of Immortals

'These demons are annoying,' Bane thought, but he couldn't really do anything about it.

He was still bound, and tied, and carried by the demons, and was being forced to endure their celebrations. Half of them were on top of him, while the rest were still carrying him to his next destination.

"Hey, Pokey! What is my next target?" Bane asked, and then the little demon with the stick turned around with a big dumb smile.

"Roccarionite Basaltorax."

"A what?" Bane asked in confusion, making the little demon burst out laughing.

"Roccarionite Basaltorax will eat you for sure, Idiot! Or just crush you into pink paste!" The demon yelled, and then he joined the others in their celebrations.

"Yeah, thanks a lot, Asshole," Bane muttered, and then was once again subjected to the demons' terrible singing, dancing, and the poking. Bane remembers each of the ugly little faces that partook in the last part. He would have his revenge.

A few hours later, the black sun had gone down, and the group was walking through the woods in the dark. They had been following the edge of the woods, and then went down into a gully. It seemed like a long and difficult trip for the demons, and Bane would have thought that they would have gotten lost, but the demons were obviously experienced at traveling.

Finally, the demons came to a stop in a clearing, and the demons carrying Bane started to lower him onto the ground. The ropes came off, but didn't move to attack any of them. He had learned his lesson from the last time he had tried to grab Pokey. The name was fitting in more than one way.

"The cave is up there, Dumb Dumb," Pokey said, pointing towards a mountain, and the demons began to walk again, but now without the ropes.

Bane followed the demons, and they went deeper into the gully, and then started to climb a small mountain. After an hour, they reached a ledge, and Pokey stopped, and turned around, and pointed at the opening of a cave.

"In there is Roccarionite Basaltorax!" Pokey exclaimed, and the demons cheered, but Bane was more confused than before.

"Can you just call him by his first name, or something? That other thing is a mouthful, and I don't even know what the hell it means. What about Rocky? I like Rocky," Bane said, and the demons all laughed at him, but he didn't care.

"Dumb Pink Man, go kill him!" the demons chanted, and then Bane was pushed into the cave by his heels, and the entrance was sealed with a huge boulder.

"I am not a Pink Man! My name is Bane! Bane! Remember that! All of you, or you are dead meat!" Bane shouted, but there was no reply.

Bane let out a sigh and started walking. He had been left with his two horned daggers, the pretty red gem he had retrieved from the last demon's head, and his eyes seemed to be able to see in the dark perfectly fine. While he knew this one was going to be harder, after the last one, Bane was starting to feel more confident.

"Alright, let's get this done."

As Bane walked into the cave, the temperature started to drop. The farther he went, the colder it got, until his breath was coming out in a white fog. 'What is with these demons and cold places?'

Finally, the tunnel opened up, and the room he was in was massive. There was no ceiling that Bane could see, just like in the last cave, making him wonder if these were some type of special space. Bane walked into the near endless room, and started looking around.

"Well, where is Rocky the Demonic Monster?"

Bane waited, but nothing happened, and he began to wander around the cavern. Bane couldn't hear anything except his own footsteps, and his breathing. After thirty minutes of looking, Bane let out a growl. He had been careful, but not slow by any means, and still had not found a single trace of the demon, and the cave seemed to go on forever.

'Where the hell is this thing!' Bane yelled in his head, and then danger bells started to go off in his head.

His first instinct was to look around, but he could feel a tremendous force boring down on him that was coming from above. Bane looked up in time to see the outline of an impossibly big foot descending at an alarming speed.

"What in the-"

*CRASH!!!*

The sound of the foot hitting the ground was deafening, and Bane was flattened. As soon as the foot came down, Bane was slammed into the ground, and everything went black.

Vision came back to Bane as the monolithic foot lifted off of him, and he peeled his sore body out of the print it had made. Bane looked up, and groaned as the foot crashed down again about thirty feet away. He couldn't see past the massive stone kneecap, which was already over 50 feet in the air.

"Rocky? Rocky, is that you?" Bane shouted, but there was no answer. "I think we got off on the wrong foot!"

*CRASH!!!*

The world had gone black again for Bane as the giant rock demon used its other foot to crush him back into the ground.

"HEY! I didn't mean to use the other foot!" Bane roared, but then he was hit by a mountain, getting golfed back out of the mountain by the giant foot.

Bane hit the boulder blocking the cave entrance, and it exploded into rubble, sending the demons, who were trying to fight a war with other small demons, flying off the mountain and into the gully, screaming as they twirled through the air.

"That was rude," Bane growled as his body healed, and he stood up, his anger flaring. He really hated being ignored when he was trying to have a friendly conversation before a fight to the death.

Bane stomped back into the tunnel, ignoring the demons cursing at him as they climbed back up the side of the mountain.

'Rocky, you're dead!'