213: I’ll Be Your Shoulder
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SLYDAR
"Dah!"
"Hey little man," I smiled at Switch, grabbin' him up in a hug and holding him tight while he giggled and patted my beard.
"Good day?" I asked as my dad, Slick, nodded. Honestly, I didn't wanna tarry. I'd felt something off from Rory earlier at the very moment I'd been outside at the skate park with a client and smelled acrid coffee on the breeze. My other dad, Muller's mental scent usually meant that something was about to happen. Muller was long gone from cancer, but he still made his presence known from time to time.
Well, remembering that didn't make me want to scoot out of Slick's place quick like. Instead, I grabbed him in a hug too which made him laugh.
"You okay, Sly? Rory? Bits?"
I nodded, though it was a lie.
"Thanks for all your help, Dad, you're a life saver."
"Any day spent with my grandkids is a good one, Slydar, so you bring Switch over as often as you can. Muller would've loved this. Seeing you as a Dah with kids of your own—"
"Ya, smelled him on the breeze a bit ago. He's never far."
Slick laughed, "He's close by awright. Up to no good half the time."
This piqued my interest 'cuz the tone in Dad's voice wasn't someone lost and grieving. I raised my brows at him.
Quirked eyebrow.
That's all he gave me. A tetchy, snarky eyebrow quirk. Hmmm. Suspicious. Then my heart dropped.
"Dad, you're not thinking of joining Muller in the Unknown Cosmos are you?"
He sent waves of calm and peace over me. "Slydar, I still love your dad, and I'm gonna see him again, but I'm gonna keep livin' and see our grandkids grown before I head to what's next, 'kay?"
The fear left me as fast as it'd come and was replaced with gratitude. That I'd known so much love in my life, that I'd always had the support of my family. Even though they griped at me and drove me half mad on a regular basis, they were a constant, and at the very center of that was Slick.
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"Love you, Dad. Thanks for always being there. Especially the times it isn't easy."
"I'll always love you Slydar, and I'm proud of you. Now get home to your wife," and as he said it, there was a mental push behind it. Like he knew something more than I did.
Yeah, all of this was ominous. Two dads giving me signals to get home to Rory, and her mind was still and silent. It didn't feel like her telepathic "do not disturb;" it felt like she was completely asleep, which she was so often since Bitsy's birth.
I didn't even think about it, I grabbed Switch and jogged home, worried that somethin' was really wrong.
"Switch!" Rory's mom called when we got home, helpin' Switch outta his coat.
"I'm gonna check on Rory. All's good here?"
She nodded, so I headed to the bedroom. Rory's mind was still and quiet. She was out like a light, exhausted. That kept happenin' to her since the surgeries. Two babies, two surgeries. Too much for anyone, really.
I slid in next to her, not wanting to wake her, but wanting to be there when she woke. Two kids. My two dads giving me messages. Lotta twos today. I felt her mind slowly coming online, groggy, not really knowing when or where she was. I pulled her onto my chest, wrapping my arms around her.
Something inside her let go, and she was back to being fully mine. Not shuttering herself off from me. It was just sweetness inside my heart and mind, but she didn't want me to know what was up with her.
Rory, you're allowed to keep to yourself if you need to. I love you, no matter what.
Her tears wet my chest, so I just kept my arms around her and let her cry it out. It really didn't seem to be about anything. Just fatigue, and overwhelm, and emotion that'd been contained for too long. I held her with my body, but my inner self, that part of me she called "molasses" wrapped around her mind and heart, lending her my strength and letting her feel that I loved her with all that I was.
"I'm sorry, Sly."
"Sorry?"
"I don't wanna be a burden."
"You wanna stay away from me? Leave me alone without you? I thought we promised to be in it together, Rory. The times it feels good to be alive, and all the rest too. I'm in it with you, babe. You don't have to understand how you feel. I don't need logical explanations step-by-step of what's goin' on with you. I just need you."
I tilted my head down and shifted her so I could look her in the eyes.
"We don't have to know what is coming, Rory. I'm in this with you. The worst moment of my entire life was when Dr. Quail called me at that coffee shop and said you needed the emergency c-section. You can have all the sad moments you need, baby, because I'm gonna love you through every single one of them."
She nodded against my shoulder, sobs shaking her chest, having no idea why she was crying, which drove her crazy. Rory hated emotions that didn't make sense, but she hated being alone with them even more, so I decided to be the shoulder she needed.
It didn't take her long to calm, so I handed her a tissue when she went quiet. I could feel her growing lighter inside, and she almost had a smile in her voice when she asked, "How do you feel about moving, Sly?"
"'Bout damn time, babe. We're cramped here, and Switch's old enough to run around outside. What're you thinking? You see a good place?"
Head shake. "Mom's gonna look; she's in full-on Ashten Crieve mode, so get ready."
Perfect. That was perfect. We could focus on getting Rory back to full health, and our parents could keep helping out with the kids while I was at work. I said a little thanks in my mind to my dads, both of them, and kissed my wife.
"Then it's gonna work out, babe."
And I was right, of course.

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