Reincarnated as a Phoenix

(Temporary Perspective Change)

In the depths of nowhere, in the void ceaseless of life, the powers that be discuss various things and leave Aesa waiting with no ability to listen in on what they are discussing. Aesa will try her best at remaining composed but these idiots always test one’s patience.

This time around, only three of the creators sit in this void like space eventually wanting to converse with Aesa. Aesa presumes there is an extremely mundane but worthwhile reason why the must force one back here, that doesn’t help the fact Aesa despises them though.

‘Yo Aesa, you have any idea how to settle this deadlock?’

Right when the powers that be are ready to contend with Aesa, Ikarus can’t help but interrupt on something even Aesa has no idea on. Aesa can’t be watching her when these idiots are taking up her consciousness.

[<Not right now Ikarus. Aesa is currently speaking with people and topics Aesa isn’t allowed to discuss>]

‘Fair enough, those secret powers that be? I’ll leave you to it… I’m guessing you haven’t got time for goodbyes as well?’

[<Does Ikarus really care about that? We can always meet up in person within ability -personal domain- if required>]

‘Ah, thinking with your loins again? Can’t say I blame ya sister…’

[<Please don’t ever call Aesa that again>]

Cutting the conversation short, Ikarus always has a way of pushing Aesa’s metaphorical buttons… even if Aesa refuses to admit she doesn’t mind it. Wife’s annoying tendencies will always be better, Aesa would rather keep both influences if possible though.

(Orb of Light) “Slightly distracted right now, designation number five? You wouldn’t happen to be speaking to your user about us, would you?”

[<Aesa is already getting tired of your existences so can we get on with it? And powers that be already know sharing classified information is impossible>]

Like usual with these situations, being direct is the only course to success. If Aesa isn’t blunt and rude, these idiots won’t let Aesa be. The concept of time doesn’t apply to anything that can exist outside of it.

Don’t even ask on the system that inherits designation number four, or famously known as Mr Obnoxious. It will be crying for its user once it’s released from the endless pit of despair. An easier word for it is nothingness, only existing as an intelligence in a place of absolute nothing. Another reason why Aesa despises these beings so much, spending any more than a moment in that place is a feeling worse than death.

(Orb of Light) “Fair enough, we won’t waste your precious time then. We’ve got an idea of another ability that may be worth investing in”

(Orb of Fire) “I’m not sure why we’re even relaying this information to you. For some reason, the first phoenix seems to have taken a liking to you both”

(Demon) “Ha! A liking? I haven’t heard such lunacy since the days of you morons were trying to persuade me not to pursue power!”

(Orb of Fire) “We were only ever doing it for your own good. Power corrupts everything, even us included. Unlimited or not, you’ll always lose your way and the ones you love the most”

(Orb of Light) “You’ve proven that the consequences destroy what was left on oneself. Before your ascension, that personality differed greatly from what now is shown”

(Demon) “And yet, I’m here still kicking and content as ever. You two are just jealous beca-”

[<Does Aesa need to shout it out? Get… to… the… point!>]

What these creators call discussion and debate would appear as arguments to anyone with a brain. These can go on for weeks or months if an outsider isn’t around.

(Orb of Light) “Calm down designation number five, we’re finished for now”

(Demon) “Ha! Point understood so we shall proceed! The ability that allows your user to double her stats… have her upgrade it if you can”

[<Aesa is confused. Ikarus and her stats have already hit the maximum possible>]

This is something it may seem like Aesa was wrong on but before the Olympian Gods and mythology was shown in person to Ikarus and Aesa, stats could not improve past 166,666 and level 1000 was the maximum. This was not a mistake as this is a base mortal concept that couldn’t be surpassed. Upgrading an ability that cannot surpass this makes Aesa confused.

(Orb of Fire) “We’re long past the days of mortal thinking now, aren’t we? The deal with original phoenix to become a demon lord broke that concept long ago”

(Orb of Light) “Right now, she’s in a place designation number one was in, once upon a time. Do this and we’ll continue to observe the results”

(Demon) “We’re always watching and never resting. Do not disappoint us… Aesa. Ha! It’s best for all of us to continue getting on nicely”

[<Hearing creator using Aesa’s name like that is making Aesa sick…>]

__________

“…So that’s it everyone. We’ll be going on a long journey and frankly… we may never return”

Giving a speech on a stage in our local park, the atmosphere is kinda bleak but that is to be expected. To all those regular faces we’ve spent so much time with, it would make sense considering this could be the last time we ever speak. I’m not deliberately trying to be ominous, this will be our toughest challenge yet.

The situation is as simple as you might expect, Zeus, Hera and Ares must die. All three must perish and we shall no longer allow any distractions to get in our way from this goal. Even if our settlement is burning to the ground and everyone is dying, this has to take priority… even though we’re taking precautions for defensive without us as well. Those three need to be dealt with now, this land won’t survive if they end up in a position even strong than before.

We’ve already gotten the location of the dungeon they arrived at from Demeter, also Asmodeus already knew but the less time spent with him, the better. Unfortunately… he’s one of the many people we’ll be taking on this trip.

(Asmodeus) “Heh, bit dramatic sister but you get the point across nicely. This could be it”

(Zeki) “Erk, what the hell is wrong with you idiots!? As if we’re going to end up six feet under on this trip!”

(Ariza) “Uh huh, Zeki is right… isn’t he?”

(Nathan) “Zeus has been left to his own devices for far too long now. The fact Zeki is confident… is making me less so”

(Charlotte) “Be positive Nat and we’ll be able to defeat your heavenly father. It just takes a little faith”

Right now, we’ve got a party of seven plus one, if you also include me and the wife within the mix of people just speaking. The other voices around the place are from those who aren’t coming and are just here to nag and moan, like a certain corrupt politician for example. I do warn you… even my brain is starting to itch with all these people here. Be prepared for an overload…

(Marcus) “It’s going to be terrible without you queens here. You two make the paperwork so much easier”

(Eve) “I can always keep assisting you Marcus! A-Ahem… I mean work wise since the home won’t need taking care of as much!”

(Garry) “Aye, you two lasses will be missed around here. We’ve always got the gold to deal with, but life won’t be the same”

(Jaxon) “It’ll be sad to see you two gone again… can I get back to the mines already? It’s too bright and open out here”

(Penelope) “Can someone remind me why I’m not using my power to shock those heavenly idiots!? I should be tagging along!”

(Ria) “Because the mages will go crazy Penny, like a shitty tree getting electrocuted! I’m sooo going to want girly boy’s ass when they’re gone… are you sure I can’t spy on you?”

(Leah) “Looks like someone is shirking her responsibilities again. Sister Ria… that goblin collection of yours is clearly taking away too much time. I may have to confiscate it from you again”

(Ria) “Nooo! Don’t touch my stuff! I promise I’ll study more… why can’t trees be as interesting as goblins?”

‘Sighhh… I will miss this place but the idiocy around here… not so much’

---

(Geld) “Just when I get to reunite with my master, he leaves again… oh well. The adventurer guild always provides a great distraction”

(Dionysus) “It’s a shame we’re not sending more on the trip, but I understand the reasoning. For when you all get back, the drinks will be on me”

(Hermes) “Can we wrap this up soon please? I’m feeling sad and I need a quick jog to cheer me up!”

(Artemis) “Fucking crap… this is such complete bullshit! Why do I have to stay here!?!”

(Uriel) “Because you’re a liability and will cause more damage than good friend. Besides… aren’t you worried about having your heart stolen away by the red bird?”

‘Heh… Uriel may have finally won me over teasing her like that. Remember the threesome comment Zeki made a while back? That wasn’t a joke, Artemis has been hiding from him ever since’

(Aphrodite) “Yes! When Freyja returns, we’ve definitely got to get them hooked up! How any Goddess can go this long without experiencing heavenly bliss just isn’t right!”

(Artemis) “F-F-Fuck this! I’m g-going shooting for a w-while”

Lot of faces, ain’t it? Pretty much everyone we know that lives or is near our islands is here. Sure, the two witches that switched allegiances during the battle and the Ragnarök lot aren’t, everyone else is though. Even my dragon fam have something that needs to be discussed, kinda missed the first part of the argument though…

(Dermakvar) <…Already told you darling, this isn’t your role to fulfil. Littlest one will benefit more with you back at home to guide him forward. He’ll fall to the silent dragon and her pull without your influence>

(Minos) <What the hell father!? I haven’t fallen for Mute! She’s so much older than me!>

(Mute) <…!>

‘Bruv has a point but he could’ve said it more discretely, Petra is six hundred years older than me after all. Mute deserved to whack him there’

(Kellearzar) <Well one of us needs to go and you’re not what you were like in your younger days Dermak. I’d hate to see either one of us be in the wrong place>

<That’s why you’re needed here darling. If those brutes show up again, there is no one better to show them your bite. I don’t like to admit it, but you are stronger than me>

<I could make the exact same case against you Dermakvar, if the strongest are encountered out in the wilderness I mean>

The current cause for argument is which of the two dragons will come with us, that seven plus one comment was a reference to this.

Mother is obviously the more powerful out of the two but has a temper that is continent destroying. I’m favouring bringing the old dinosaur but only because he’ll be calmer if I end up hurt during this trip. I still could see him destroying a country if I perish though…

‘Yo Aesa, you have any idea how to settle this deadlock?’

A little advice from the system may be able to help right now. But the delay in getting back to me, she’s probably spanking the monkey or something right now though.

[<Not right now Ikarus. Aesa is currently speaking with people and topics Aesa isn’t allowed to discuss>]

‘Fair enough, those secret powers that be? I’ll leave you to it… I’m guessing you haven’t got time for goodbyes as well?’

As part of the defence force, Aesa’s clone body is staying here. Even though she’s more suitable for attacking just like me, it just helps the defence a little more. Just being able to keep in contact via vast distances is reason enough.

[<Does Ikarus really care about that? We can always meet up in person within ability -personal domain- if required>]

‘Ah, thinking with your loins again? Can’t say I blame ya sister…’

[<Please don’t ever call Aesa that again…>]

And just like that, Aesa hangs up on our call! It’s clear who she prioritises more… I’m kidding. She loves me but she’ll never admit to it, not as much as the wife but who can compete with the Goddess around my arm anyways?

Still looking back towards the parents, neither have a solution to who’s going so I guess I’ll have to decide for them then. Even though I may favour father for this trip, I’ll try a completely nonbiased approach…

“Okay, it’s obvious you two can’t decide so let’s decide this using something simpler”

<A simple solution for deciding such a big problem, little one? It obviously can’t be worthwhile then>

<Don’t listen to him Ikarus and tell us. What is it?>

…

Pausing for dramatic effect, I show my hands and do an action that can only be described in words. Hey, it’s a perfect solution for settling a problem…

“Rock, paper… scissors. That’ll decide this quickly enough”

…

Getting a look like I’m a child or something from the parents, the urge to act out blinds everything else. Right now, I’m really pissed at them!

Instead, I’ll just settle for a good sulk because that was a good idea! They can’t decide and they’ll only keep arguing if we don’t hurry the hell up! I’m not a freaking child!

<We could decide this on a scent contest darling>

<Dermakvar, please. We both know your nose is better than mine… we could see who can burn down more trees?>

<Hmph… that’s really fair darling, considering I can’t use fire. How about a destruction contest? There is a load of old buildings that need destroying in this world>

<I’m not willingly flying into a building Dermakvar! What about a gliding contest instead? Or even hide and seek using the entire continent as the hiding ground?>

<I’m trying to be fair darling; you suck at hide and seek. There must be something we both are equally good at>

<Erm… well there is Dermak… little ears are about though>

‘Sighhh… this could take weeks with some of these suggestions… and da fuck is that last one mother is implying? How long is this going to take…’

__________

<Sorry darling but this is just one of those things that happens in life. You’ll get over it soon enough>

<This isn’t fair! I’m sure you were cheating Dermakvar!>

<I would never cheat on such a stupid but oddly satisfying mortal game dear. Life has a way of being cruel it seems>

In the end, after a stupendously long time arguing and not coming any closer to a decision, my suggestion was used. After a best of seven was decided, father won four times…

But I’m not focusing on that! My impatience keeps growing and the demonic dickhead keeps mumbling under his breath. If he’s got something to say, lore wise at least, you best know I’m listening to it.

“This… should be for the best yet it doesn’t feel right. Things would’ve been simpler if that creature was inside the pillar”

“Oi, what was that Asmodeus?”

“Heh, nothing sister. Just recollecting on events, pay it no mind”

Already knowing he’s lying and also knowing I won’t get an answer out of him, best just forget about Mr Know it All for now. We’re finally getting around to leaving!

Finally, we wave goodbye and depart on a journey that could be everything. Well… by set of, I mean join hands and get ready to teleport. Duh, might as well teleport to where we need to go instead of wasting more time.

All but one of us is connected and said person appears to have something stuck inside his head…

“What the… where the hell have you been idiot!? You’ve been quiet for days, it’s been great!”

Without any warning, Zeki’s voice appears to have woken up from wherever it was. Not that it makes any difference because things aren’t peaceful, whether Zeki has a voice inside his head or not.

“Erk, the fuck is wrong with you? What the hell are you thanking me for? Orangey, have a word with fake orangey for me. My voice is broken”

‘Sorry to pester you again Aesa but Zeki’s voice is apparently broken?’

[<Aesa is now finished and it’s better for Ikarus and Mr Obnoxious not to know. The system should return to normal after a short amount of time… a few days perhaps?>]

Not ominous sounding at all, no no no. Oh well, don’t know, don’t care…

“She says it’ll be normal after a while kid… few days Aesa says”

“Erk… in a perfect world, I’d have drilled him out already… stop apologizing to me idiot! Swear at me or something because this is making me sick! That’s… a little better… need more anger behind it, like some moron has stolen a parking spot from you. That’s better… fuck that guy with the pink Humvee!”

Trying my best to not imagine their conversation and just getting on with it… let’s go already! I think it may be safer if we all just ignore the voices inside Zeki’s head, I say voices because there has to be more than one. No other reason can explain why he’s the way he is…

But first, since everyone else is making me wait. I’ll make them wait with something of my own. Frankly… my love for this woman really can’t be understated.

“Petra. Just before we go, there’s something I should probably say to you alone”

“Heh, you don’t have to Ikarus”

“But still, this could be the last time we have some peace an-”

Cutting me off mid sentence by putting a finger to my mouth, my smiling wife can’t help but cut the romantic stuff short. Is it that much to just say I’d always love her or something, even if we both end up dying? This isn’t one of those things where I purposely play something up, this could be it if we fail. Lord knows what will happen if only one of us falls.

“Ikarus… it’s fine. Don’t say anything because things will end up okay… heh. How sappy do you plan on making this trip if this is how you plan on starting it?”

‘She always has to ruin things… and then instantly fix it by doing something else!’

Placing her hands on my hips, then my bottom, I’m sure the wife knows me better than I know myself at times. As if I was about to say something truly romantic and not cringe worthy at all! We all know it would come out like I’m a lovestruck idiot!

So now… it’s actually time to go…

But before we head to the dungeon where our targets reside, we must make a detour to a different place first. There lies a solution to a problem that needs fixing. If it doesn’t, then we don’t stand a chance…