Reincarnated as a Phoenix

---Quick life update to anyone who cares lol, I was starting to get back into the flow of this and of course, I’m ill again. Think it’s covid or some sort of viral crap down to the way my heart has been recently, not even like I can sleep it off due to how my heart likes to work.

---Basically, uploads will remain sporadic like this until I can get myself somewhat better. It’s a shame this didn’t happen on the volume break fast approaching but oh well.

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(Zeki) “Erk, feel like I’m going to spew… oh orangey, you’re a right bastar-, Ouch! The both of you are now hitting me together!?”

(Ariza) “Don’t call Ikarus a bastard then Zeki! Even though I’m not happy about this, that’s just plain rude”

(Petra) “…”

(Asmodeus) “Heh, it’s just a little bit of warmth, what’s the problem?”

Now back in our little pack of phoenixes alongside the demon lord Asmodeus, we’ve all just teleported to the outskirts of the mesa we visited so long ago and now, have a desert to traverse. Like the fates aligned, the back of Zeki’s head receives two bumps as both my wife and the lovely Ariza defend my honour. It does say a lot both those two are like scolding mothers when it comes to the Amazonian queen.

“Relax kid, the trip shouldn’t be that long and I’ve even brought something to help out with the heat…”

Getting out the aphrodisiacs in question, a question comes to mind about how this may affect the other phoenixes in question. Sure, Ariza still isn’t sure about that wyvern prince so she may be okay but will Zeki be alright with no busty dryad in sight? Eh, guess we’ll find out, there is something I need to whisper to Petra real quick though.

“…Petra, we’re definitely not taking these today. If you’ve got any in storage, give them to me now because we’re not even risking it”

I mean, a sexy session with Petra is great and all but not in far reaches of the never-ending Krieger desert. Sand is no fun, didn’t I say something like that yesterday? Ah, forget it, no nasty business! Let’s hope this isn’t her cue to go full ecchi on me because it’s not happening!

“Heh, in agreement Ikarus. No more you know what until we get home… can’t promise about the kissing or biting though”

Petra swiftly whispers to me back an-, d-damn it, she just nibbled my ear! Don’t think anyone else saw that but this is why she can’t be trusted! I swear she’s got the libido of a guy living in his mum’s basement or something.

“A-Anyways… let’s get a move on and skip this travelling time. Other than the rare camel or large scorpion, there shouldn’t be much out here”

‘Probably best for me and Ariza to fly first as well, Zeki does look like he’s about to spew…’

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Gliding across the gleaming desert with the sun against my wings, even I’m already feeling the heat despite normally being quite good with it so, a relaxed glide is best for today. It’s probably best for the other two birds if I don’t try and fly too fast, it’s guaranteed to get moans if I do since I marginally seem to be the quickest.

While we’re making the commute towards the location Asmodeus has pinpointed, Zeki comes out with something really strange…

“Hey brother, doesn’t that cactus look like Ria’s fat ass down there, way over to the right? I swear it looks identical”

“Uh, really Zeki? Please, just drink some water, you’re seeing things”

Trying my best not to facepalm hiding my beak under one of my wings, I reluctantly look to where Zeki pointed at and… wait a second.

“Heh, you’re probably seeing a mirage Zek-”

“No no Petra, I think he’s right. I see her as well, are we both having strokes or something?”

“Ha! Even orangey agrees with me, I know that cow’s fat arse from miles away!”

Switching direction and gliding down to where he was looking, the image gets clearer and clearer as the outline of a person is seen hiding behind a thin but tall cactus. Ariza quickly follows along as I’m just hovering about above the idiotic dryad, never thought I’d ever see one this far away from any trees. That’s definitely Ria the cow and not a different looking dryad, right? No, it’s definitely her, those planets are uncanny.

“What the actual fuck cow!? You keep coming and going, then randomly show up in the middle of nowhere!?”

“He-he, alright girly boy? Turns out with all this stupid, pointless studying about boring trees I’ve been doing with sis, there’s a way I can communicate with cactuses! The idiots think they’re a family of trees or something, it just means I travel anywhere to find you now!”

‘Can never forget dryads can basically form anywhere if trees, or now cacti are around’

“Erk, though I’d be safe… such a pain in the freaking ass”

“I heard that girly boy! One of you get down here already and pick me up!”

Both me and Ariza look to each other and are unsure what to say. On one hand, I’ve already got two on my back and she has one so she’s due an extra passenger but, with the cow and the additional baggage and weight she brings, I feel a little sorry putting this duty on her. Regardless of if I feel sorry or not, it’s still only fair if she takes her. Could just let the tree spirt find her own way but that’s more moaning just waiting to happen.

“You mind Ariza?”

“Uh, as long as they promise not to do anything funny up on my back”

“He-he, I can promise but I don’t think girly boy can. I can smell that aphrodisiac from a hundred cactuses away”

‘Wait, Zeki’s already downed one of those pots? Damn, they really don’t do anything to him… Ria really needs to learn the word cacti as well’

“As if I’d want you right now cow, think I’d rather have a go with a scorpion than your fat ass”

…

Almost like he was expecting someone to laugh at his stupid joke, Zeki scoffs when nothing is heard except a desert cricket chirping. Even Asmodeus who tends to find weird and odd stuff funny didn’t find that humorous.

‘Let’s just get a move on again. Four phoenixes, a demon lord and now a dryad, this really is turning into a skit…’

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(Ikarus) “So… this is this the huge desert city I’ve seen on a map once or twice… what was it called again?”

(Asmodeus) “Heh, welcome to Atlantis orange one, the largest city in the mortal world. Visited this place many times before when it came to the odd scouting mission and it still thrives, even today”

(Zeki) “Atlantis? Why the hell is it called that when we’re in the desert? What idiot came up with that name?”

(Ariza) “I think the name is sarcastic Zeki? Not every myth is going to be the same from our world”

(Petra) “Huh, I vaguely remember that name as well. It was supposed to be underwater, right?”

(Ria) “I wonder if there’s any goblins around here…”

After a couple of days of travelling, we’re now in viewing distance of a desert city incomparable to any other, vast as the eye can see. In some ways, the trip alone makes this sight worth it, this place is as majestic as the elven city of Aurora, just for different reasons.

Located on the coast to the great ocean of the east, the ironically named city of Atlantis might be comparable to the great cities the pharaohs built if we’re comparing it, the architecture also shares that ancient Egyptian styling. We’ve already witnessed the great pyramid of this world but a city this vast and comparable in size to a modern one, it almost looks like a mirage. I wonder if this place also has a weird and troubled history using extreme slavery for labour? Just obviously with beastkin instead.

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---No new changes but still makes sense to show.

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The place also has dozens of trading carriages around the outside even using camels instead of horses, presumably down to the temperatures. The urge to pet them all must be overwhelming Ariza right now but obviously, we’re here for work.

“Once we enter the city phoenixes and tree spirit, this is where things will get a little odd. I’m unfortunately unable to specifically predict where the next of my brothers will be at but, I can at least give you all a name and an idea on what to expect”

(Ikarus) “So then demon, who are we hunting?”

“Heh, the next of the majin lords is Beelzebub and he has a taste for… well, anything really. Let’s hope this isn’t what I’m expecting, but I wouldn’t bet on it”

Already sensing the demon being purposely vague, we cut the conversation short and get going to the

Walking at decent pace, we quickly make our way to the wall of the city and oddly find no guards nor anyone stopping us from entering the open gate. This seems a little odd because most cities do tend to have at least something stopping anyone from entering, normally just a quick chat with the guard is good enough. Maybe this place is peaceful enough so it’s not needed? We’re yet to come across any desert bandits so I’m guessing raids aren’t that common.

It doesn’t take long for that theory to go out the window, they may not have bandits down here but a much greater problem seems to persist around here.

“Oh, dear God… I really wasn’t expecting this”

Having walked a good distance getting into the city proper, we come across the main packed out high street filled with animal eared beastkin everywhere. Despite the fact this place is filled, the atmosphere is eerily quiet, most likely down to all the wanted posters around…

(Wanted! The city will pay for anyone who has information on the killer! Anything will help…)

(Anyone know who the cannibal is? That motherfucker got my sister and have an untouched basement ready for use, want to get medieval on his arse…)

(Don’t go out at night! Why the city hasn’t set a curfew yet is beyond me!? I knew a girl who had a cousin, who’s best friend was eaten!)

(We’re all going to die! Don’t trust anyone…)

Located on nearly every shop window and every building, it’s almost as if this guy is the cannibalistic Jack the ripper with this reputation going around. I know Asmodeus said this guy has a hunger but actual consumption of people? No chance we’re reasoning with this fucker…

“You heard who he got last night? It’s a good thing she had family because her daughter would’ve been orphaned”

“Disgusting! What has this world come to where people are being eaten like animals on the street?”

“Yeah, I know right? At least show a bit of honour and fight fist to fist with the person if you’re going to do that! Maybe the eating women part is a little too much but at least have some pride!”

Even the odd passerby we walk past all seem rattled by the events transpiring around here, best try and focus elsewhere because these people look like they’re about to jump at the smallest of things. It kinda makes me want to use an air horn and see the reaction but probably should leave the stupidity to the toxic couple over there.

“Uh… I think I’m going to be sick… this guy eats people?”

“Erk, what kind of a sick bastard goes around doing something like this!? We’re hurting him orangey, whether you want to or not”

“Relax kid, as if I’m going to defend a cannibal. He’ll soon taste his own blood, mark my words”

(Petra) “…”

(Ria) “Never understood why some goblins do that as well, do people have a nice taste then?”

“Heh, I assume none of you will have any complaints on killing him? He was always considered an outcast even compared to the rest of us”

Asmodeus can’t help but make an uncomfortable joke, but I’m actually for him lighting the mood a little today, it’s not every day you run into something like this so we’re going to be a little stressed already. Motherfucker eats people, even dragons or vampires don’t do that in this world.

“You have any idea where we should start Asmodeus?”

“Heh, just wait a second dark one and maybe, just maybe the fates will present an encounter…”

All of a sudden, a couple hooded people quickly walk out of one of the alleyways connected to this high street, bumping straight into our group of six. Heck, one of these idiots even knocked over Ariza!

“Uh, awe-awe-awie! Sorry ma’am but I- I… Ariza!?! What are you doing over here!?”

‘The demon lord knew we’d run into the wyvern prince and king? Of course he freaking did, presumably they’re here for the same reason we are? This world loves a good coincidence’

“Not the time boy, hood back up. We’re trying to keep a low profile here”

The prince almost looks a little dejected when his father scolds him, but the fact his love Ariza is here immediately puts another smile on his face. If they’re trying to remain hidden, they probably are hunting him unless… they secretly are the cannibals all along! My father’s fake hatred of flying rats was right all along…

“Please don’t tell me you wyverns are in league with the cannibal demon lord, those cloaks make you seem sus as hell”

Clearly not understanding my sense of humour, the prince seems absolutely shocked from my ’accusation’.

“What!? That’s madness Queen Ikarus! We’re hunting the evildoer!”

That gets a huge facepalm from the father as well, never realized Ariza’s future husband is this dense but damn, the kid is a right joy. Probably should be nice as he might be way too easy to mess with.

“Heh, so you’re doing the same thing we are then? That can’t be the only reason you travelled this distance though?”

Petra asks a pretty good question all things considered. Their country is in Maladonia and we’re in the furthest part east of the Krieger continent, it must’ve been another coincidence…

“It’s a complicated story Queen Petra but the gist of it basically comes down to the airships and first coming over here to renegotiate the deal. The fuel, and air we use for them is found in great amounts under the sand, we’ve found another source so we’ll be needing less going forward and that was the purpose of the trip”

“Uh huh, this cannibal thing is because me and father thought we could manip-, no, gain favour with the leader of this city by capturing the cannibal!”

The wyvern King facepalms again from his happy son clearly spilling what should’ve been quite the intelligent plan, both me and Petra are struggling not to chuckle from this brief interaction as this kid really is a delight.

As for Ariza herself… was that a little blush I saw? I seriously doubt she’s even listening to the conversation, living mostly inside that head of hers right now. This would be a perfect opportunity for ol’obnoxious Ikarus to tease but as if I could ever do something like that now! Growing up has made me boring unfortunately, Ariza’s way too precious as well.

“Anyways… we’re dealing with a demon lord? Presumably, the man alongside you is also the same?”

Asmodeus steps up to answer himself surprisingly me a little, mainly because of how little the king couldn’t care about conversing with a lord in the flesh. I guess me and Petra must have more of a personal history as we’ve wanted to instantly kill any we’ve come across, he probably doesn’t.

“Heh, it’s a pleasure to see you once again. Been way too long since we last conversed king of the wyverns”

“We’ve met before? I have no idea what you’re talking about but it doesn’t matter right now, you have any idea where the cannibal may be? We’ve been searching this city for a good week now and still no luck”

‘No rest for the wicked, huh… guess it makes sense if this guy is killing more and more everyday’

“Heh, if it’s the brother I’m so very fond of, he likes to eat at least three times a day and has a preference, but isn’t fussy or stupid enough to care… Maybe start with the slums and work from there? It’s most likely the place with the lowest number of guards”

“Then we’ll say our goodbyes and that’s where we’re going this minute… if we need to speak any further, head to the Raging Bull on the high street and we’ll talk more there…”

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“Erk, is this really the slums of this city? It’s pure filt-, motherfucker! What idiot just dumps their piss out the window like that!? This place needs a new paint of crimson”

“Calm it down kid… oh, that really gotcha, didn’t it?”

“Girly boy… um, you might need a clean now. Even I wouldn’t sleep with you like that”

“Uh, poor Zeki… that’s gross”

“Heh, the red one really has great luck, we’ve only just gotten here and you’re already covered in filth”

(Petra) “…”

Upon arriving in the pure squaller region of this gigantic city after Asmodeus’s suggestion, Zeki gets a taste of pure karma in the form of a bucket emptying its contents right out of the upper story window. Even for my wickedness, karma in the form of being pissed on might be a little much, no?

“You can probably sit this one out now kid, unless you’re happy running around covered in muck?”

“Heh, you do this often Zeki? That can’t be good for keeping your skin young and soft”

I was trying to be subtle but the smell makes it hard, Petra being awfully funny doesn’t help as well. There was more than just piss in that bucket…

“Yeah yeah, laugh at my misfortune sis. I’m going to that inn the blue rat suggested, they better have a bath… the bucket thrower is lucky I’m not alone; entire streets normally burn for this…”

Zeki grumbling away, running off into the distance just leaving the five of us to now search the slums. Can’t help but give me head a quick shake after that little incident, it’s now time to find this bastard. Where does one even look to find a cannibal? A human farm or something? Okay, that’s a real shitty joke… almost like what Zeki’s covered in…

I know we can neglect our people quite the bit but if we ever have a region that ends up looking like a wooden shanty town, covered in muck and filth, I promise you we’ll be there to personally fix it ourselves. This place must be swimming in disease and sickness, just one look at it and you can see why I’d think that.

“So, are we going to split up like the two wyverns and cover more ground quickly? How hard can it be to find him anyway?”

It seems risky like something idiots would do in a horror film but it can’t be that bad, right? I mean, if we partially half the group and put the demon lord with Ariza and Ria, then it means me and Petra can smooch while also trying to save lives. It’s a win-win, right?

“Heh, before we split up and search for him orange one, I should probably give you a word of warning. This brother of mine does tend to have some weird and specific tastes, most specifically being red heads. Not really sure why but apparently red headed women taste the best? Obviously meaning the flesh, not the funny euphemism”

Huh, this guy is a cannibal pervert as well with those ‘tastes’. At least this allows me to play bait if it’s needed, put a sign up across my neck saying free meal or something… bet Petra’s had a dream like that once before. Jokes aside, I am happy to draw him ou-, wait a second! I’m not the only red headed female around here…

“Erm, what about Zeki, demon? Should we have sent him away like that?”

I mean, he’ll be fine, right? It’s Zeki we’re talking about, the only person who can harm him is us phoenixes and his own stupidity. He’ll be alright… we haven’t come across a cannibalistic demon before though…

“Heh, guess that completely slipped my mind. He’ll be alright… probably. It’s fine if he loses an arm or two, right?”

Both me and Petra understanding the meaning behind his words despite him trying to jest. She proceeds to slowly approach him while I back her up…

“Asmodeus… what are you playing at? Was this your plan? Your intention to use him as bait?”

“…”

Instead of giving a verbal response, Petra gets a sinister smile which immediately sends her over the edge before I get the chance. Fucking Zeki ran off down one of the thousands of alleyways in this place, he could be anywhere right now!

Throwing him into the wall, arm up against his throat and eyes as black as the night, both Ria and Ariza are surprised by Petra’s reaction obviously not fully clocking on why we’re both pissed at him just yet. It doesn’t matter how much we may have to tolerate Zeki, we’re not fucking sacrificing him to a cannibal! I’ll help her skin this guy before that happens…

“You better fucking speak Asmodeus or me and Ikarus will make you, one way or another”

“Heh, relax dark one. Even if he’s ended up in the hands of my brother, we’ve got loads of time before things start to get risky. Even if we wait a day or so, he’ll only lose a finger or two, where’s the harm in that?”

Not even needing her to ask, I get even closer visibly pissed and willing to cut this smiling fucker at any second, I knew we’d lock horns at some point but not because of freaking Zeki.

“It doesn’t matter what you think demon, me and Petra are running the show around here so, if anything happens to Zeki, you will deeply regret it”

“Mark my words Asmodeus, Zeki’s life is now tied to yours. If he even loses a hair on that stupid head of his, we’ll make sure your future ends here today”

Even Ria and Ariza now back us up while we’re making threats. This isn’t one of those moments for kindness when this guy is trying his own thing without informing us first, don’t be trying to fuck with our phoenix fam! Zeki’s like that idiotic brother we all can’t stand but need to bail out when he does something irredeemable, who else could I mock if he ends up eaten anyways!?

“Heh, you two should really lighten up a little bit. Trying to find the red one in the largest city in the world, won’t be any challenge at all…”