Paragon of Weaponmasters

Paragon Earl says: Are you streaming soon?

Paragon Lovelymoose says: Yes, I have something different in mind today.

Paragon Earl says: Oh? Another tour around the city?

Paragon Lovelymoose says: not quite. Meet me here.

She sends me a map marker on the other side of the Gormer forest. Wasn't there a portal to the forest somewhere?

It dawns on me that I could have reached Lagakh faster if I had taken a portal to her. I feel sick to my stomach, my self recrimination bubbling back to the surface. I have to slow my breathing and remind myself that I arrived well before the assassins, time was not a factor. Her death is not my fault, it's nobody's fault except her father's who sent the assassins.

Deep breaths.

I give Helga one final wave as she logs out, vanishing. I find my way to the Masstaoir portal, and use it to reach the Foundation portal crossroad. Is that why this game is called Crossroads Online? I'll have to ask Peter. Using the Cumbergoine portal puts me over half way to my destination.

Seeing as we've still got some travel time, I reach out to Apaki.

What happened in the arena?

…

I could make you answer me, but I'd prefer if we had a partnership like Thozur and I have.

Your goal is to escape your prison. My goal is much the same, however you are easily distracted, and the source of your power is running dry.

You mean I'm weaker since tuesday? Sure, but I'm going to keep leveling and I'll get stronger that way. No matter how much they nerf me.

That does not solve the problem of your lack of focus.

We wait for Peter to continue the story quests and level up because we have a partnership with him too.

He is holding us back.

Have you been like this the whole time?

It seems I mistimed my inevitable betrayal. Yes, Thozur even warned you as such.

Well quit it. We've got shit to do, and two unruly weapons is two too many.

…quit it?

Yeah, you're a sentient two weapon. Start acting like it.

…

I feel Apaki consider my words.

Thunderhead was a sentient one weapon, and was completely bound to its basic 'programming'. When Thozur grew from a sentient one to a sentient two, it was clear something changed. As if Thozur 'gained consciousness' like a child, as we used to say. If Apaki is on the same level they are perfectly capable of rising above their urge to lie and betray. Think outside of the box.

I spot Lovelymoose on the shore of a small pond when I arrive. It's surrounded by dense forest on all sides, slowly rising to a high cliff with a waterfall cascading onto the rocks below. She's facing my direction, anticipating where I'd be coming from.

"Hey!" I say, waving.

"Hey." she responds. She's wearing a flattering yellow summer dress instead of her normal moss-laden robes.

"I like your dress." I tell her with a smile.

"Thanks." Her nose turns red, the minotaur equivalent of blushing.

"So what are we up to today?" I ask, trying to ease her embarrassment by changing the subject.

"Well…" she begins saying. "There's a secret behind the waterfall I wanted you to see."

"Oh ok. Like a secret plant?" I ask, walking past her around the shoreline towards the waterfall.

"Something like that." she says.

"Okay." I chuckle. Keep your secrets. I carefully step rock-by-rock toward the roaring falls, making it without slipping. Behind the falls is a cave, exactly where you'd put a hidden chest in a video game. Except, as I stand there dripping wet, the cave is empty but for me. I put my hands on my hips, feeling kind of silly. Am I blind? I check every nook and cranny for something, only finding smooth river stones and damp cave walls.

"Hey, I might be dumb but I don't see…" I start to say as I exit the waterfall.

Lovelymoose is no longer on the shore, instead she is swimming in the middle of the pond with only her head and shoulders above water. It's distorted, but even from here I can tell she's no longer wearing her dress. In fact, she's not wearing anything at all. I stand there, staring dumbly.

"Would you like to join me?" she asks.

I look around, both stalling and checking to see if we have any unwelcome guests. I guess I didn't leave her waiting long in the water, she managed to set up a privacy screen all around the perimeter of the pond.

Paragon Earl says: Hey Helga…

Paragon Helga says: Earl, if you don't fuck her I'm going to come do it for you.

Paragon Earl says: What? How did you know?

Paragon Helga says: She was streaming setting up the screen. Now get in there!

Paragon Earl says: You really don't mind?

Paragon Helga says: No!

Without a word, I unequip all of my armor, unable to hold back my smirk as she covers her mouth in surprise.

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I wade into the shallow pool, gently swimming over to her. Even taking it slow, I still accidentally bump into her when I arrive, pressing our bodies together.

"Sorry." I tell her, righting myself nearby.

"It's ok." she chuckles.

"What brought this on?" I ask, hoping not to ruin the moment but painfully curious.

"I saw the video." she tells me. I don't have to ask what one.

"Oh." I say, thinking. "You decided you wanted a turn?"

She just nods, nose beet red. It's my turn to chuckle, as I swim over to her. I place my hands on her hips to stabilize her, and lean in to kiss her long neck. I sputter as I get a hair in my mouth, we both look at eachother embarrassed.

"I could switch to another character if you want… you know, one that's not a minotaur." she offers.

"No." I say, pulling her close. "You're perfect."

[Content removed]

She lays down a new beach towel for us when we return to shore. We use towels to dry off, I enjoy every moment before she puts her robes back on.

"Hey earl, can we have a serious conversation?" she asks hesitantly.

"Sure." I say, suddenly nervous. These never end well.

She lays down on the beach towel, head propped up on one arm. 'Draw me like one of your french minotaur'

I mirror her pose on the other half of the towel. She smirks, probably thinking I look silly.

"So I don't want you to think I'm… that kind of girl." she begins. "Not that there's anything wrong with that, It's not who I am."

"How do you mean?" I ask for clarification.

She bites her lip, thinking.

"The kind of girl to have casual sex. I wanted it this time, but if we ever did anything like that again I'd want to be in a committed relationship." she explains.

"Ah." I say.

She waits for me to say more, I don't.

"Ah?" she repeats back at me.

"Sorry, I'm…" I try to put it into words. "You know about my wife, I've only had a few months to move on. Sex is one thing, but a relationship?" I shrug. "Maybe we can get to know each other first and see where it goes?"

Her mouth twists while she thinks. Clearly I've said something she finds objectionable, but there's a more important point in there for her.

"I'd like to get to know you." she finally says.

"I'm an open book, what would you like to know?" I say, forgetting I most certainly am not.

"How about names? Mine is Melody Cook." she tells me.

I wince. Right to the heart of it, huh?

"Luke." I say, smiling, hoping that's good enough.

"No last name?" she asks. Damn it.

"It's uhh.. A secret." I say, trying and failing not to sound like a bullshitter.

"A secret? Why?" she prys.

"I'm in witness protection." I feed her the lie I tried on Bell and Peter. Even behind the privacy screen, I'm extremely wary of telling her anything The Monitor would flay me for.

She stands, and pulls the beach towel into her inventory, leaving me on the bare ground.

"Wait, where are you going?" I ask, standing with her.

"I'm not going to let you lie to me, Earl." she says, walking away.

"I'm not…" I begin

"You're not in witness protection, that makes no sense. You're a Paragon, the whole world is talking about you. What kind of handler would let you do that?" She interrupts me.

"What do you want me to say?" I ask, she turns around. "Would you accept that I can't tell you?"

She raises an eyebrow, arms crossed.

"I can't tell you my name, and I can't tell you why I can't tell you my name." I say.

"What can you tell me?" she asks, clearly unconvinced.

"Almost anything else." I plead.

She just stares at me, then rolls her eyes.

"What do you do for work?" she inquires.

"I used to do I.T.. I replaced old computers." I tell her.

"Okay." she says, unmoving. "Do you have any hobbies, besides video games?"

"Do I get to ask you questions?" I try to ease the pressure off.

Again, she just stares at me.

"Alright. I listened to a lot of audio dramas. The Magnus Archives and Wolf 359 are my favorites." I answer.

"I've never heard of those." she says. "Go ahead, ask me something." she adds after a moment.

"Hmm." I have to think about it, now that I have the opportunity. "What's your favorite flower?"

"Blue Poppy" she tells me. "You?"

"Sunflowers." I say.

"Kinda basic." she smirks. That's a good sign, I think?

"I like how they turn to face the sun. It's interesting, like they're more alive than we think, just moving slowly." I shrug.

"That's a better answer." she concedes. "I need to get back to streaming. I had a good time with you Earl, we should get to know each other. If you can't tell me something, just say that. I don't like it, and I don't understand why you can't tell me something as surface level as your name."

"Sorry." is all I can say.

"Do you really want to get to know me?" she asks, rubbing her arm.

"Yes, I do." I tell her.

"Okay." she says. "Talk to you later?"

"Yeah." I smile.

She vanishes, and her privacy screen goes with her. I sigh, it would be great if one relationship in this life could go smoothly. This one's problems aren't even my fault, if I told her everything she wouldn't believe me. The only reason Helga and Peter do is because they saw evidence.

I'm not over my wife, and maybe I'm not over Lagakh. We weren't together, but there was something there.

I stop getting lost in thought as I notice the pond is boiling. Steam and bubbles rise from the surface, as the water changes from crystal clear to red. I brace for impact as something takes shape in the center.

The Monitor, of course. Made of flowing water shaped into a robed humanoid. It raises the index finger of its right hand, the tip slowly turns white as a liquid that's not water pools there. Gross.

"Funny. I never considered doing it myself." it says with a bubbling voice, like a pot of soup that can talk.

"Do what?" I dare ask.

Without answering, the figure vanishes with my D.N.A. sample.

I really, really don't like that.

"Why wouldn't you just adopt?" I ask Trinne in our bedroom as we get changed into our comfy clothes.

"Having their own child means a lot to some people." she tells me.

"But spending thousands of dollars for a doctor to pump you full of fertilized eggs over and over, and hope for the best?" I shrug. "I don't know if it means that much to me."

"Is that what you would have done if we couldn't have Millie? Adopt?" She asks, facing away from me while she clasps her bra.

"I think so." I tell her.

"We had Millie, though. It didn't take any effort, either. So you can't really say what you would have done if we couldn't." she informs me.

"Guess not." I say, not wanting to argue.

She turns to face me, still in just her underwear.

"Some people want what they can't have, and the harder it is to get, the more they want it. Even if it's expensive, or risky, especially if it's impossible." she says.

"I get the feeling this might be about more than just your sister's infertility." I notice.

"She wouldn't talk to me for years after we announced we were expecting Millie. I just want to be happy for her, and be happy that I have my sister back." she sighs.

"Okay, I'll drop it. How about that blender her friend got her?" I change the subject.

"Babyshower gifts other than necessities for the baby are so dumb." she rehashes the old conversation we had back before our baby shower.

"I wish your parents got us more diapers." I laugh.

"Me too." she agrees.

"Millie was a poop machine those first four years." I laugh, talking to myself.

Peter has come online.