Paragon of Weaponmasters

Even though the bed is larger than a Texas King, there isn't an inch of it that isn't occupied by an elf, a beastwomen, or me. Helga must have left already. I carefully extricate myself, trying not to wake any of them. Once I reach the edge and hop off, I spot the system message that woke me.

SERVER SHUTDOWN IN 15:00

I slept that long? 20 days, 14 hours until I run out of game time. I Sure did. I use my hertson so I'm already in Masstaoir when the servers go down. Chat is filled with complaints when the loading screen vanishes, just like it always is on Tuesday mornings. It's like the players forget the game shuts down for a few hours every week. Bert and Toebark are in place, playing their roles. I find a chair, and wait until the clock strikes zero.

The few players who wander in disappear, leaving the three of us behind.

"Bert! Toebark!" I shout, throwing my hands in the air. "It feels like it's been forever!"

"Big adventures make for a long week, eh?" Bert responds.

"Tell us everything." Toebark says after crossing the room to stand near me.

"Let's wait until everyone gets here." I say, staring out the open doorway. Gunner and Jack walk in together, grinning as they see me.

"Earl! How you doin buddy?" Gunner asks.

Jack's little raccoon nose twitches as he sniffs the air.

"More like who has he been doin." he says with a mischievous smile. He counts on his fingers, eyes widening as the number climbs. "Fourteen? You dog!"

"I'm a hero to the elves and beastpeople, what can I say?" I shrug. Gunner carries the table over, and we all take seats around it.

"What have you discovered?" Toebark asks, insisting we get serious.

"Ok, so The Monitor is planning something, and it's very secretive about it. Half the time I don't know if it's trying to help or hinder me." I tell them.

"Specifics." Toebark says.

"Ok, let me try to remember everything. The Monitor appeared in a dungeon after I had cleared it too fast too many times. It let me know that was against the rules. Then it intervened when a player reported me for hacking and banned him instead." I pause to think. "Then when Peter and I were doing quests, the objective changed. Then everything got really screwy for a while, it even mind controlled a boss and left her permanently disfigured."

"It didn't stop you, or hurt you?" Toebark asks. When he left the city, the monitor dragged him back and made it so the players could kill him for their own amusement.

"Not until it figured out that Peter and his mom were working to figure out what the hell it's up to. I guess it couldn't hurt Peter directly, so it used me to get to him."

"Sounds about right." Gunner adds.

"The players don't even know the Monitor is running the show. As far as they know, it's a team of people like it used to be. Peter's mom is one of the human developers left after the layoffs, and his father is a lawyer for the game company."

"The monitor keeps them from helping." Bert says.

"Yeah. I can't even talk about the Monitor when the servers are up, It's always watching and makes sure I know it."

"Hence the name." A familiar growly voice says from the entryway. We all turn, everyone but me stiffen in apprehension.

"Farroris?" I say. I know he told me we'd meet up on tuesday, but I didn't let myself believe it until this moment. He steps through the door, approaching the table. "This is Bert, Gunner, Jack, and Toebark. Everyone, this is Farroris. He's… like us, I guess."

"My name was Bassil al-Faris." Farroris tells us.

"Laserface let you remember?" Jack asks.

"I remember too." I tell them. "My name was Luke Walton. It said I could have my memories back a little bit at a time, now I think I have them all. Most of them at least."

"Didn't think that was worth mentioning?" Bert asks.

"I had a lot to cover." I tell him. "So should we call you Bassil?"

"Faris is fine."

"How much do you remember?" Gunner asks Faris.

"Everything, I think. I grew up in New York, working in my family's restaurant. I was at the Mosque, there was a shooting… I didn't make it." Faris tells us, uttering the last part quietly.

"Yeah, we all died." Jack says, unsympathetic. "Why weren't you put in the city?"

"The machine said it wanted to test what would happen if it put a human mind in an existing character. So I was put into the body of the beastmen leader. It was very confusing at first, I had my memories from my human life, and this body's memories. I remember the tiger's wife, losing her, raising his son. I remember Earl saving them from that orc." He smiles at me. "This new life has been strange, but my son is newly wed, and I have friends."

"Good for you." Jack says dismissively. "The rest of us are rooted on the spot for six days a week, Earl's the only one who gets special attention from laserface, and it's a bit of a love-hate relationship."

"I apologize. The machine said you may be apprehensive of me, but that I should meet you all here today anyways." Faris bows slightly, holding his hands together in front of him.

"How do we know you're not reporting back to The Monitor?" Toebark asks.

"We'll kill you if you do." Jack stands on his chair, trying to look threatening.

"Not much of a threat if he just comes back like we do." Gunner rests a massive hand on Jack's shoulder.

"Earl said the bosses he kills don't come back. It could work if he does it." Bert mentions.

"Guys, I don't think the threats are necessary. Faris is one of us, even if his treatment has been a little different." I interject

"A little." Toebark snorts.

"I will go, I hope you all have an enjoyable Tuesday." Faris says, turning to leave.

"No no stay, come play poker with us!" I stop him, retrieving the cards from the bar.

"Ah, apologies I cannot." Faris frowns. "It is haram."

"Oh, ok." I say, placing the deck on the table. We all watch as Faris leaves, not saying a word. I take my seat and deal out the first hand. No one speaks, other than to play the game.

"So there's more like us out there." Toebark says after folding.

"Yeah, I'd call them unlucky bastards, but it sounds like the cat is living it up in his own city." Jack says, gesturing with his empty hand. "Imagine if one of us got reincarnated as the Honorlord. Maybe things around here wouldn't be so shitty."

"I'm not sure that's how it works." I say, pushing my wood chips into the pot. "Farroris didn't have a name when we first met, after the quests went all screwy he did. I meant to ask if his son is a person too, but I didn't get the chance."

"Probably would've brought him along." Bert tells me, going all-in with me.

"You're probably right." I acknowledge. "How have you guys been?"

"The orc guards have been getting aggressive." Gunner tells me.

"Yeah, they're acting like real nazis." Jack adds. "Something about removing the 'criminal population' from Masstaoir, that just so happens to be everyone but the orcs."

"I just got started on the quests to remove the Honorlord and his spawn from power, that's probably why." I mention. The four of them all look at me. "What?"

"Nothing has ever changed in this city since we all got here. Months and months have passed. Now you're out adventuring, and suddenly things change?" Jack asks.

I don't know what to say, so we sit in silence. Are we all linked together somehow? Plenty of players have done these quests before, maybe not with all of the glitches I've experienced, but Peter said this expansion causes a total overhaul of the systems in place.

"When I progress the story, you guys experience the changes, but not when any other player does." I state my theory.

"It appears so." Bert says.

"You said something earlier that doesn't make sense, Jack." I change the subject

"He does that." Gunner laughs, Jack punches him in the arm.

"What?" Jack asks me.

"You said you all died when Faris brought up his death. The last time I was here, you guys didn't have any memories of your past life. What do you all remember?" I ask.

"Thursday of last week the servers went down for a few minutes. Toebark and I suddenly knew our names, our old lives. They barely had time to meet us here, to tell us they remembered too. Not only our old lives, but everything The Monitor made us forget since it brought us here." Bert tells me.

"I was an insurance adjuster." Gunner says.

"Travel agent." Jack says.

"Mechanic" Toebark says.

"Bar owner, ironically." Bert says with a small smile.

"I.T." I say, shaking my head. "You guys didn't give anything away when I visited."

"Even with our memories restored and other changes happening, we still didn't know what laserface would tolerate. So we kept playing our roles." Bert tells me.

"It told me you all… lost it when you had your full memories." I frown, not knowing how to phrase it politely.

"I remember." Jack says quietly. "It was too much. Human memories in a racoon body. Remembering dying. Everyone I left behind."

We all nod solemnly. I wipe a tear from my eye, my mind wanders to my wife and child who think I'm dead.

"We don't have time now, but maybe we can all share next week. Take turns or something." Gunner says. "I've known these knuckleheads forever, and we've never talked about our families, or lives."

"How typical of a bunch of guy friends." I joke, they snort or chuckle.

We fall into comfortable silence, only speaking to raise, call, or fold. After a few rounds, I'm teleported back to my old shop. I look at the new Urul Mulush that took my place, using his services to sell off the crap I've collected and repair my armor. It's a net loss, but not a huge one. Although it does remind me to check my mail.

"Die with honor" He tells me.

"You too." I say, waving as I walk away.

You receive 27,068 gold.

Most of the stuff I put up for auction sold, but not everything. After the auction house gets its cut, my total gold has finally climbed over 100,000. One fifth of the way to my goal. I refuse to think about my gold earning pace compared to how much time I have left. My heart races just thinking about thinking about it.

I decide to just hold onto the ore and other mined goods that didn't sell.

Iwanttobelieve says: Good afternoon, Earl. Lovelymoose's time slot moves on Tuesdays, so you'll be streaming shortly.

Earl says: Ok, sounds good. Question for you.

Iwanttobelieve says: Shoot.

Earl says: I need to pay for game time. Can some of my salary be used for that?

Iwanttobelieve says: Funny story, when we signed you we looked up your game account and couldn't find anything. We assumed you'd create an account under a pseudonym, given your circumstances, but there is no account associated with your game character.

Earl says: Huh. That's weird.

Iwanttobelieve says: Yeah, weird. So given that you're a dead man with no bank or game account to speak of, there is no way to get your money directly to you.

Earl says: Could you like, trade it to me in game?

Iwanttobelive says: Any gold movement of that size would get flagged immediately. Not to mention this character they gave me is a media only character and can't trade anyways.

Earl says: Well shit, it was worth a shot.

How the hell am I going to make 400,000 more gold in… 20 days, 12 hours? Nope, not going to think about it. I'm going to focus on foraging. Thinking about mushrooms... 400,000 mushrooms. God damn it. I open my Paragon friends list and find Lovelymoose online.

Earl says: Good afternoon.

The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

Lovelymoose says: Hey, good afternoon. Ready to stream?

Earl says: Yup.

She invites me to a group, and I'm surprised to see she's in Masstaoir too. The class trainer district. I make my way there on my chariot, dismounting when I reach a copse of trees I haven't seen before.

"This must be the nature trainers area." I say when I find her sitting at a fancy white two-person table.

"Mmmhmm." she confirms with a mouthful of croissant. She waves her hand at the seat across from her, covering her mouth as she chews. "First time here?"

"Yep. My class trainer is one guy in a hut. I don't have a communal space." I look around, observing the oasis. A large pond full of fish, frogs, and other aquatic life is surrounded by trees and plant life of all shapes and sizes. N.P.C.s tend to them, feeding and trimming.

"That's a shame." she says. I notice one of her eyes is fogged, so she's already streaming.

"What're we picking today?" I ask.

"Brains." she says, smiling. I raise an eyebrow, her nose turns red. "Picking each other's brains. Sorry, bad joke."

I snort, smirking. It was a fine joke, I'm just slow.

"On Tuesdays I just chat with my… chat." She trips over her words. She takes a deep breath to center herself. "They get to vote on topics and everyone voted for you."

"Oh yeah?" I say, resting my head on my hands, elbows on the table.

She clears her throat.

"They'd like to know more about you." she tells me.

"Anything specific?" I ask

"They want to know if you're single." she blurts out.

I stop to consider the answer. She seems to grow more nervous as time goes on.

"It's complicated." I say. She raises an eyebrow, and I sigh before continuing. "You could say my wife and I are separated, she remarried a while ago."

"Oh." Lovelymoose says. I look elsewhere, not wanting her to see the sadness in my eyes.

"I haven't seen my daughter since we were separated." I fight back tears. "I miss them."

"We don't have to talk about it." Lovelymoose tells me.

"It's ok. I haven't really talked to anybody about it. It's nice to get it out." I give her my best smile, wiping my eyes. "What're your fans saying?"

"They are gushing about how sensitive you are, and asking what about Helga." She tells me. The way she finishes her sentence, I have a feeling she's wondering about Helga herself.

"Yeah I'm a bit of a crybaby." I say.

"I don't think you're a crybaby."

"Thanks." I watch her struggle not to repeat the question about Helga. "Helga is a friend."

"With benefits?" She asks.

"I guess you could call it that." I shrug. "We keep finding ourselves in situations where it just kind of happens."

"You know she's using you, right?" She inquires, I can tell it's rhetorical.

"Yeah I know. I've come to expect transactional relationships. She's looking after Lagakh for me, and I give her content."

"That's a cynical way to approach life." She crosses her arms.

I shrug again. I'm thirty four, at least I was when I died. Do the years since dying count?

"How old are you?" I ask.

"I'm twenty eight." She tells me, not even pretending to be offended that I asked a woman her age.

"Huh. Well I'm glad you're not as cynical as I am. Give it another six years." I cross my arms too.

"I didn't say I disagreed. My class doesn't lend itself to a strong belief in people." She tells me.

"I didn't realize your personal beliefs influenced your class." I say, an eyebrow raised. I don't like what that might say about me.

"When I started playing Crossroad Online, I began as a Wizard and specialized in nature magic to unlock Druid. Leveling in clear cut felt wrong, I kept asking myself why am I helping these orcs cut down all of the trees? It went against my class identity. So I attacked the orc lumberjacks instead of the boars." She says.

"And doing that unlocked Reclaimer?" I ask

"Yes. It also made Masstaoir hostile to me. So I can only teleport into this grove and the Hall of Honor. I'd be attacked if I walked through the front gate."

"I can tell why your class is unpopular." I tell her.

"It's a pain, but you see this world from a totally different perspective. Anybody can play a minotaur and run around Masstaoir, but I have a relationship with nature that even the Druid Paragon can't replicate." she says.

"What about real nature?" I wonder why she bothers with this game when she can go experience the natural world.

"Why do you think I only stream for a few hours a day?" she smirks. It's the first time I've seen her even half-smile, it's a cute look on her minotaur face. She stops when we realize I'm staring.

"Sorry." I say.

"Don't worry about it." she tells me.

Neither of us say anything for a while. I watch the caretakers wandering the grounds, sometimes stopping to give one of the nearby animals affection. A strange creature with an owl's face on the body of a bear with enormous wings on its back wanders over to me. It must be either a child, or this species of whatever-it-is doesn't grow any larger than a labrador. It rubs against my leg, looking up at me expectantly.

"Hi there" I giggle, giving it scritches on its round head. It growls… happily? It's an odd gravely sound to match its odd body.

Class unlocked: Beastmaster

"Huh." I say, moving my fingers between its shoulder blades. "Just unlocked Beastmaster." I tell Lovelymoose. When I turn to look at her, she's got her chin resting on her hands, looking at the owl-bear and I with pouting lips and glistening eyes. This must be the cutest damn thing she's ever seen.

"That's cool." she clears her throat, returning to more stand-offish body language.

"Does your audience like them?" I ask, holding the owlbear's head to face her. It hoots.

Her face scrunches up like somebody kicked her in the shin.

"Adorable." she says. "They think it's adorable." She puts extra emphasis on they.

"Are you adorable?" I ask the creature in a baby voice. "Yes you are." It closes its eyes and hoots happily. "What do you eat?" it rotates its head like a curious dog, except it keeps going past 90 degrees and stops when its face is completely upside down.

"Owlbears eat fish. We can catch some if you'd like." She retrieves a fishing rod from her inventory.

"You can fish in this game?" I ask

"Yeah, you can do practically anything. Fishing is a minor profession, you can have as many of those as you'd like." She tells me.

"Oh neat, I didn't know that. Can I learn it in the profession district?"

"Right here." She shows me on the map. "Don't forget to buy a rod."

"Be right back." I give the owlbear one more pat before hopping on my chariot and making my way to the profession district.

The fishing trainer is right where Lovelymoose said they'd be, a catfish beastman casually reeling in his line off of a dock. The water is completely opaque with mud and surrounded by overgrown reeds. If I had to guess, this isn't a natural pond, likely the result of the deforestation of this area.

The trainer isn't a named mob, so he doesn't have much to say. I learn fishing and open the shopping menu to buy a rod, pausing when I notice the other items he has for sale. Bait, clothing, hats and folding chairs. I spontaneously decide to buy bait, a full set of island fishing clothes, two hats and two chairs. It costs me a few hundred gold but it's a drop in the bucket.

When I return to Lovelymoose, I'm wearing a Hawaiian shirt, khaki shorts, sandals, and a straw hat. She can't help but snort when she sees me, but I catch her sneaking a look at my exposed chest.

"For you." I say, opening a trade window. I place some of the bait, a hat and a chair in it. She accepts the trade, then equips the hat. Now we match.

"Thank you." she says, opening the chair near the shore. I join her on my own chair.

The owlbear sits next to me and watches as I put bait on my hook. I consider letting it have some worms, but decide to save its appetite for whatever I catch. Lovelymoose and I cast our lines, and wait in silence for a bite.

"So you don't have anything against fishing?" I ask, wondering how her nature-aligned class deals with what could be a contradiction of beliefs.

"No, the food chain is a natural thing. As long as we throw back any fish we're not going to eat, it's just a part of life for fish to be eaten." she tells me.

"Mm." I nod. I feel a nibble, and almost yank my line in surprise. I wait, leaning over with both hands on my rod. It bites, I pull my rod, and start reeling. The fish that is pulled to shore is fairly large, with opal scales that glitter in the light. It has a pair of little fairy wings that flutter as they breach the surface.

Fishing skill increased to 2.

Faefish added to inventory.

"Can I cook it for the little guy, or will they only eat it raw?" I ask Lovelymoose before I retrieve it from my inventory.

"You might not have high enough level cooking. The only reason you could catch that fish is because the bait and the hat are giving you temporary levels in fishing.

"Oh really?" I didn't know that. Looking at the hat on my character menu shows me exactly what she's talking about.

Straw Fishing Hat - Uncommon helm - Minimum Fishing

"Is there equipment for other professions too?" I ask.

"Yeah. Mining helmets, blacksmithing aprons, things like that." she says, slowly reeling her line in.

Huh. So professions have equipment, and it has vague stats just like regular gear. You learn something new every day.

"Can you cook the fish?" I ask

"Sure." she puts away her rod, and makes a camp fire appear between us. I have to hold my hand on the owlbear's chest the whole time she's cooking to keep them from getting too close to the fire. Lovelymoose spins the fish on a spit, watching carefully as the fish slowly darkens. "There." she says, removing the fish after a few moments.

"That quick?" I ask, surprised.

"Yeah. Imagine if players had to slave over a hot stove for hours just to get food buffs. Most players don't have the patience for fun stuff, nevermind cooking." she tells me.

"You don't think cooking is fun?"

"Ugh, no. Especially not in real life. How am I supposed to know when something is done cooking? The food thermometer is always out of batteries, so I have to guess, and then I get nervous that I'm going to catch salmonella and I end up ordering grubhub instead." she grumbles

I laugh, nodding along as she's ranting.

"I feel the exact same way." I tell her.

She hands me the cooked fish on a stick, and I offer it to the owlbear. It sniffs at it, then takes a tentative nibble. It hoots happily, and gobbles down the whole thing in one bite.

"Like that huh?" I scratch them behind the ears as they look up at me expectantly. Behind me, Lovelymoose has already reeled in another fish and started cooking. "So what makes fishing and cooking minor professions?"

"Any crafting profession that isn't useful for combat or requires two or more gathering professions, and those gathering professions are all minor." she informs me. "Fishing, cooking, butchering, pottery, tattooing… There's a ton of them."

"You can get tattoos in this game?" I ask, excited.

She gives me a look like I'm a child who's so dumb it's cute.

"You can do anything in this game, Earl." she chuckles. "Let me log onto my character that can move freely around Masstaoir."

She vanishes, leaving me alone with the owlbear. It sneaks over to the fire and snatches the cooked fish before it disappears, as the fire and chair vanish.

"You're fast." I tell them, running my hand over their back.

Moosetamer has invited you to a group.

"Lovelymoose I presume?" I say in group chat.

"Nope, this is Barak Obama." she says. "Uhhh… let me be clear" she does an impressive impression. I laugh.

"That's pretty good!" I tell her. She laughs too.

"Thanks." I watch her dot on the map move from near the auction house to me. She appears in the grove, riding the same moose mount.

Moosetamer, Friend of Animals. Level 90 Beastmaster.

This character is also a female minotaur, but she has black fur and horns instead of brown. She wears a full suit of blue scaled armor with gold trim and hood rests over her head, horns poking through either side. The armor is more form-fitting than her other character's mossy dress. She doesn't seem to mind me taking it in with my eyes, but her animal companion gives me a derisive snort. A huge moose with dangerous looking antlers stands at her side, watching me.

Multnomah. Level 90.

"Ready to go?" Moosetamer asks.

"Sure." I say, looking down at the owlbear at my side, who's looking up at me. "Do you want to join us?"

The owlbear cub hops in excitement, but a shrieking roar makes us both jump. Another owlbear, at least ten feet tall and just as wide, lumbers over to us. This must be my little buddy's mother. They run over to the enormous matron's side, looking at me sadly.

"Don't worry, I'll visit." I tell them. It hoots happily, following its mother as she walks away.

"You could switch to Beastmaster." Moosetamer tells me.

"I know, but I'm used to Weaponmaster. I'm the only one, too. Makes me feel special." I joke.

She nods, and pats the back of her moose behind where she's seated.

"Hop on" she instructs me.

"I didn't know we could ride eachother's mounts." I say, struggling onto the tall creature. She has to give me a hand. I very gingerly place my hands on her sides, barely touching her. I still feel her shift under the pressure, making herself comfortable. The sensation of her body moving in my hands sends electricity coursing through me.

"It's a special ability you get at max level. It encourages 'veteran' players to play with new players." she tells me.

She instructs the mount forward, and we ride from the trainer district to the profession district. She takes me to one stand after another, giving me the opportunity to learn new minor professions. Even if I'll never use them, I pick up every one.

Cooking learned!

Butchering learned!

Ceramics learned!

First aid learned!

Chandlery learned!

Calligraphy learned!

Tattooing learned!

There's more minor professions than I can count. Some of them I haven't even heard of, like Chandlery. Apparently that's what candle making is called.

"Has anyone given you a tour around the city?" Moosetamer asks after I'm done.

"No, I've only been to the auction house, the Hall of Honor, the Honorlord's joint, and where you've taken me today." I tell her.

She gestures for me to get back on her mount, and she takes me to the front gate of the city, starting her tour from there.

"That's the Inn. You should go to the innkeeper and grab a herston, you can use it to teleport back here." she tells me.

"I've actually already done that. I forgot a few places." I say.

"Ok." she responds, moving to the next building. "This is the bank. You can store extra items you want to keep but don't have room for in your inventory. You can also keep currency in the bank. Anything you put in it can be picked up by your other characters, it's all account wide."

"Neat." I say, not mentioning that I seemingly have unlimited inventory. That must not be typical. I also can't create a new character.

"Here's where you can repair your equipment. You've done that right?" She stops in front of my old shop.

"Yep." I say, not wanting to linger.

"Huh." she says, looking inside. "The orc in here looks just like you." She's staring at Urul Mulush.

"What a funny coincidence!" I laugh awkwardly.

I let go of the breath I didn't realize I was holding when she moves us away. We ride into a district I've never visited, west of the lower city. It's a lot more colorful here, with what looks like a barbershop, nail salon, and various other cosmetic boutiques.

"Here's where you can change your character appearance after creation. I noticed your armor is a little mismatched so I assumed you haven't used glamour before. Any of these places can sell you some for your equipment."

"I meant to ask my friend Peter where to get some." I tell her, dismounting.

The red-and-white pole spins as I walk through the door, bell ringing. A well-dressed orc with a huge pair of shears in his hand waits for me next to a chair. I take a seat, and a menu pops up. A selection of styles and colors appear. My current hairdo is called "Raider's Braid", my beard is "Rugged", and my color is "Jet Black". I open the dropdown for hairstyles, and cycle through them.

"Bald" reveals my green scalp. I worry for a moment that I've just cut off all of my hair, but when I select "Short", I have a full head of hair again. "Afro" doesn't suit me, and "Locs" feels weird, even if I'm green now, I used to be white. "Long and Curly" matches what I had in my previous life, but I can envision it getting in my way in combat. Instead, I select "Long and Curly Ponytail."

I leave the hair color the way it is. It's not my natural color, but black looks good on an orc. My beard style is called "Rugged", I take a look at a few of my options but just decide to leave it as is. I could braid it or make it so long it reaches my belly button, but I'm happy with the I-Shaved-a-month-ago look.

I step back out after paying the 'nominal' ten gold fee to change my appearance, swaying my head to show off my new do.

"What do you think?" I ask Moosetamer.

"Good." she says. "Did you forget the glamour?"

"Yes I did!" I spin in place, marching right back into the barbershop. The barber sells one unit of glamour for one gold. I have eleven pieces of equipment not including my weapons,, so I grab that much to start. When I use the glamour, a new menu opens. It's like a catalog of every piece of armor I've ever worn or looted. "Huh." I say to myself when I select "Full sets" and see the very first option.

Vanquished Hero

My original gear from Thunderspank is one of my options. Along with all of the full armor sets I've crafted and the Thunder God belt and gloves that count as a set. Maybe if I wanted to run around with my dick out. Of all of my options, the Vanquished Hero is definitely the best looking. Sleek, layered black plate. The cape Thunderspark wore also matches the set well, gray-furred collar on a black cape. I confirm my choice, and my mis-matched armor transforms into the dark metal set. I choose not to display my necklace or rings.

I walk out again, with my arms spread wide. I do a little twirl to show it all off, with a "Eh?"

"Much better." Moosetamer says. "It's about time I log off for the day. We should do this again sometime."

"For sure!" I smile. She vanishes, her mooses giving me an accusatory look before they do as well. "Well… now what?"