I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality

Xu Qing was thinking that if someday someone from the Government Office came to ask him for the chair, he would just say it was lost, and that he hadn't seen it. If they wanted him to compensate, well, he had a redwood coffin they could take away instead.

That coffin used much more wood than a Master's Chair.

But Xu Qing only thought about it; it was just a chair. No matter how comfortable it was, he couldn't seriously keep it, could he?

Xu Qing sat in the Master's Chair and could see the activity at the Incense and Candle Shop diagonally opposite.

In recent days, the Incense and Candle Shop had been livelier than before, attracting more people.

The young Miss from the Wang Family and Boss Cheng supported each other, like a mother and daughter, their days becoming increasingly respectable.

Inside the Incense and Candle Shop, when Cheng Caiyun sprinkled water onto the street, she happened to see Xu Qing tilting his head, smiling at the two of them.

"That Scholar Xu's cousin only comes to visit him once every few days. And whenever she comes, he's not at home, leaving the young lady to watch the shop. I don't know what he's thinking," Cheng Caiyun muttered to the young Miss Wang, who was learning embroidery.

Wang Yue'e smiled and said, "The gentleman is not an ordinary person; he must have important business outside."

"What business could be more important than life's major matters? Look at him, alone every day and all happy, without the slightest worry,"

Hearing this, Wang Yue'e set down her needlework and looked seriously at the front door of the Funeral Shop, then said inexplicably, "But I feel his shop is very lively, livelier than any other shop on the street."

Hearing that, Cheng Caiyun felt a chill down her neck: "My good girl, don't say such frightening things again. That house of Xu's, besides coffins, has only a cat. How can it be livelier than us?"

The young Miss Wang earnestly said, "But I really feel it's lively, as if there are many people inside. If you don't believe me, godmother, look, it seems the gentleman is talking to someone now."

Cheng Caiyun looked over and indeed saw Xu Qing in the Master's Chair, tilting his face, seemingly talking to someone, even nodding from time to time.

It was late summer, not too cold, the autumn tiger occasionally showing its fierce power, far from the cold winter yet, but Boss Cheng shuddered inexplicably.

Such a young girl's eyes are clear, and the Funeral Shop deals with so many dead bodies, who's to say she didn't see something filthy?

In the Funeral Shop, Xu Qing was listening to Huang Xiaoliu from Transmission Hall reporting the various happenings in Linjiang County.

For instance, the Imperial Inspector had arrived in Linjiang County yesterday, and Shopkeeper Wu Yaohua from the neighboring Paper Mache Shop had also been taken for interrogation at the Linjiang County Government Office.

There was also another piece of news: Shang Shaoyang, staying temporarily at the County Lord's house, had gotten into another brawl the day before, beating up people from the Mirror Bureau.

This time, the 'arrogant and domineering' Young Master Shang had hit a hard wall; it's said he's now in the Government Office jail.

Xu Qing didn't think much of it. To Shang Shaoyang, the Government Office was like his own home. You put him in the Government Office jail, aside from keeping him settled for a few days, could it really make him reform and become a true wastrel?

After all, this Young Master Shang was from the main line of the Shang family in Qianzhou. Xu Qing had heard that the officials leading the Mirror Bureau, none of them had the guts to offend the Shang family, even if you lent them a few guts.

The deterrent power of a thousand-year aristocratic family isn't something to be taken lightly!

...

That day, Xu Qing planned to continue searching for a suitable temple priest candidate. Before leaving, Xuan Yu eagerly asked what he would bring back this time.

Xu Qing found it inexplicable; he wasn't some old lady scavenger who picked up everything and brought something home every time.

Just as Xu Qing left, he hadn't gone far when he saw quite a commotion at the end of Underground Street.

Three carriages, ten or so servants, when the carriages got closer, the people inside hurriedly lifted the curtains.

At a glance, Xu Qing saw an official stepping down, wearing a square official uniform embellished with flying birds.

This official was none other than Wu Wencai from the Wu family, who used to travel to the Prefecture City to take exams with Xu Qing.

They say people are complimented by clothes, just like horses are flattered by saddles. Now, Xu Qing had to address this Wu family youth as Master Wu.

"The humble scholar pays respects to Master Wu," Xu Qing cupped his hands in greeting.

"Don't do this, don't do this, Brother Xu, you're killing me!" Wu Wencai was embarrassed by Xu Qing's words, his face beet red.

If not for Xu Qing, the spirits of their two brothers might still be wandering in limbo, and his sister-in-law, uncle, and aunt wouldn't have been able to survive.

After teasing the brothers, Xu Qing saw they hadn't forgotten their roots, and his tone returned to normal.

"Are you wearing the official uniform to take your position in Pingqiu County, Wencai?"

Wu Wencai shook his head: "There are still grievances in the family that need resolution; how could I just proceed to take a position? Besides, my predecessor hasn't completed his term, and it doesn't matter where I wait for an empty position."

On the side, Wu Zhiyuan smiled and said: "Wencai doesn't have many free days. Recently, the Imperial Inspector has been sitting in court here on trial, and we are planning to file our grievances today. Once this is resolved, Wencai will also proceed to Pingqiu County to take up his duties."

When Xu Qing heard this, he became instantly spirited: "When does the trial start?"

"When our old mother is taken to the Government Office, that's when the trial will begin."

"Wencai, how can you wear an official uniform to the trial?"

Wu Wencai was young, full of youthful vigor, and wasn't paying attention to these details.

Having worked in the underworld business for a long time, Xu Qing's thoughts were a bit steadier than the Wu brothers.

Seeing Wu Wencai didn't understand his meaning, he thought about it and casually suggested: "If you go wearing this official robe, others might think you're flaunting your official power. After all, at the time of the incident, you were ordinary citizens. If you stand under trial in officials' clothes, how would others view it?"

"You should wear regular clothes. If you really want to feel proud, wait until you leave the Government Office, then ride the official sedan with the servants and have them change you into official attire. Wouldn't it be better to visit the chief official this way? Maybe you'll even leave a good story behind."

Wu Wencai listened, a bit dumbfounded, and after a long while, squeezed out a sentence: "Brother Xu, high wisdom!"

After picking up the old lady of the Wu family, the two brothers no longer rode in the carriages and only let the servants take the official garb to the Government Office later.

The neighbors, hearing that the Wu family was going to drum up grievances, many followed along. Everyone knew of Wu Yaohua's character, and some had watched the Wu brothers grow up, so now that they were going to the Government Office, naturally, people wanted to help bolster their momentum.

At the Government Office's entrance, many citizens were already gathered outside the hall, as a case was being heard inside.

Ordinary people couldn't easily enter the Government Office, where Government Officials would stand in two rows with sticks, serving as a barrier. As soon as Xu Qing reached the entrance, an official cleared a path for him to pass.

Xu Qing was delighted, never expecting to have a seat reserved to watch the show.

He was really something.

"Hey, hey, Younger Brother Xu!"

Xu Qing heard a call, turned around, and saw a familiar face.

Indeed, wherever there was excitement, there was Guo Dongyang.

"Old Guo, you're not allowed in, are you?"

Guo Dongyang disputed, thinking, why can you go in and not me?

Xu Qing laughed and said, "That's different. If someone dies under punishment in court later, I might help as a Funeral Master to take care of it."

"What use is it for a storyteller like you to go in?

"Would you stand in front of someone, hit a clapper, tell a story, and make them come back to life?"

Guo Dongyang was left speechless, and after a while, he managed to squeeze out a few words, "You're wise, Brother Xu!"

After picking up the Wu family's old lady, the two brothers didn't ride the carriage, only sending the servants with the carriage and official robes to the Government Office later.

This position to watch the show made him envious.

As soon as Xu Qing walked up to the court, Wang Lingyuan reached out and pulled him to his side. Without daring to make loud noises, the two senior brothers nodded at each other and turned their attention to the court.

The case being tried on the court was familiar to Xu Qing; it was from Qu Shui Village, involving Chen Feng.

As it turned out, when Xu Qing reached the court, the baby in the swaddle, who accidentally caught sight of Xu Qing's figure, immediately stopped crying and instead burst into a radiant smile.

Not only that, the infant even reached out a little hand towards Xu Qing from afar.

"..."

Xu Qing grinned, baring his teeth, but the child wasn't scared; instead, he laughed even more cheerfully.

They say an infant with an open fontanel can see demons and ghosts, but now it seems that saying has no basis. Otherwise, how could this unlucky child not tell the difference between a vicious zombie?