I Became Artemis’ Boyfriend

I am the Goddess of the Moon and the Goddess of Purity, Artemis.

I have an older brother named Apollo, and one day he came to see me and said something.

All gods are increasing their worshippers to raise their authority and prestige, expanding their cities.

He suggested that since the seat of the Twelve Gods could be taken by someone else, I should try a little effort.

But I rejected him outright, saying that the City Luna alone was enough for me.

I didn’t wish to remain a god who filled their self-esteem by receiving human belief and admiration.

What’s the point of living a life being conscious of others’ gaze and thoughts?

What defines me is only myself.

I am mine alone.

However, recently, one person has caught my attention despite my usual apathy.

That’s my 9th rank priest, Ark.

Originally, I didn’t need any priests.

However, it was a regulation at the gods’ meeting that I must hire at least one priest, so I hired him out of necessity.

I left him alone, but he took the initiative to do his work, and in less than a year, my City Luna had grown to rival the cities of high-ranking gods.

I was overjoyed to have such an obedient subordinate.

Above all, unlike other humans who smelled bad because they didn’t bathe properly, Ark always smelled sweet, like honey.

A few times, I caught my priestesses pretending to talk to him and sniffing him.

The moment they tried to flirt with him, I intended to drive them all out, but as a priest of the Goddess of Purity, he maintained a proper distance.

We also communicated well despite our disagreements.

It felt good, even when we argued!

It’s aggravating when we don’t talk at all!

Yeah… He’s really fun.

But then he suddenly confessed to me.

He, he, he… he… he… he… wants to be my boyfriend.

Ah, really! Why does he stutter so much even though he hasn’t said anything out loud?

How aggravating!

His confession left me perplexed.

As the tide subsided, confusion turned into irritation.

I was incensed at the idea that I had possibly been too kind to him, leading him to feel love for me.

How dare a human… how does he perceive my authority?

What does he think it is?

So, with Dad’s help, I decided to impose the Twelve Labors on him.

Indeed, my dad is always on my side.

My brother Heracles was born with the destiny of a great hero, and despite being only half divine, he has reached the ranks of gods by succeeding in these labors.

What’s the chance for an ordinary human like him to succeed at the Twelve Labors? It’s probably as rare as seeing the sun and moon overlap.

So I began by giving him an impossible trial meant to frighten him.

“Go sell seawater to Poseidon.”

It may seem simple at a glance.

But Ark is smart enough to realize right away how difficult this task is.

“Give up. Then I, the Goddess, will forgive you.”

Like an infant who cries and is forgiven by their mother’s embrace, you too can beg pitifully for my forgiveness.

And I will soothe you with the heart of a mother and forgive you.

But his pupils continuously moved, seeking ways out.

“…You’ve really thought this through. Not bad for the first trial.”

What? Swaggering?

Ugh… So you really want to be my boyfriend?

Do you want to bring me down from my position as a god so much?

That absolutely cannot happen!

Desiring to break Ark’s spirit, I ended up doing things that pricked my conscience.

The moment the labor began, I handed him a stack of unresolved matters—complaints and maintenance issues of bows.

I heard that the priests of Apollo spent over a month handling these kinds of issues, so I figured this would tie him down long enough.

But what do you know?

Are you too capable?

In just a week, Ark handled everything.

Why?

Why don’t you give up?

Why does a mortal, with a life-span of less than a hundred years, challenge my authority so fiercely?

Why won’t you give me a chance to forgive your mistakes with my generous heart?

“It’s a waste. Finding a smart priest like you is harder than plucking stars from the sky. So don’t bother.”

Ultimately, out of the desire not to lose such an capable subordinate, I bowed my pride and made the suggestion myself.

However, he spoke nonsense about not being good at fights, and said,

“Both giving up and loving have one thing in common—they are decisions I make myself.”

He bid me farewell in a dignified manner, showing no hint of intimidation.

Damn him!

Bad man!

Son of a gun!

How dare you reject me when I extended my hand first?

You’re too arrogant.

Alright. I’ll interfere until the end.

I’ll cradle your cries in lullabies a week from now.

I hated Ark so much for dismissing my sincere effort to keep such a capable subordinate.

Bang!

I slammed the door to the temple’s private quarters.

After beating the pillow on the sofa for a while, I went to my vanity.

On it were Volume 4 of ‘Mourning House Spicy Beef Soup,’ and a jewel box.

I was curious about the remaining part of the half-read Volume 4 and had planned to finish it today.

“Let me read it later.”

I closed the book.

Then I opened the jewel box.

It was brimming with expensive gem rings—rubies, sapphires, diamonds, and more.

With my finger, I sifted through them and picked up a copper ring lying at the bottom of the box.

Facing the mirror where my earnest reflection appeared, I slipped it onto my ring finger.

And in the mirror, the beautiful goddess vanished, and a rugged 40-year-old uncle with a beard appeared.

“Ugh! This beard still irritates me.”

No mortal knows the appearance of gods.

Thus, gods frequently use their power for covert surveillance of people within the city.

Though transformation is a power constrained by several requirements, the main two are:

1. The transformed shape must not belong to this world.

2. There must be a medium that connects the god and the human world.

The copper ring I wear belonged to an individual named Jake, who dedicated it as tribute before his death, saying it had long guarded the well-being of his family and now hoped to protect Artemis.

Hence, not only could I transform into Jake, but I could also feel his memories and the past through it.

“Three hundred years already? Thanks for the help today.”

I kissed the copper ring and left the temple immediately.

Arriving in the City Luna before Ark, I pulled my carriage awaiting at the stable to the square.

I posed as a coachman to blend in for a simple reason.

In case acquaintances later accuse me of being hard to find after establishing connections as Jake, the pretense maintains plausibility.

I transport people and goods between cities, so naturally, I can’t stay put in one.

“Uncle.”

“Whoa! Who’s this? Isn’t it Priest Ark? Hahaha!”

“Please drop the honorific. You can just call me Ark.”

As expected, when I pretended to be busy with something else, Ark came to Jake, someone he felt most comfortable with.

After a clash with him, the ease with which Ark approached Jake revealed a warmer side to him.

Great.

During the ride to Portna, I’d ask questions and probe his intentions on solving the trial.

“Uncle, do you think selling earth to Demeter is feasible?”

Cough! What a fool.

To talk so explicitly about the trial’s content!

Though we should head to Poseidon’s harbor city, he only slightly changed the topic to talk about selling seawater as soil to me.

Phfft.

Ark is undoubtedly cornered.

Even if I know, why would I tell you?

I absolutely won’t.

Thus, I merely pretended to muse deeply.

Anyway, it’s fine. Once time passes, I’ll say something along the lines of, ‘Sorry, I don’t know,’ and that’ll be that.

Hmm… Wait?

Why must I adopt such a passive attitude?

Rather, if I spin things around and tell the opposite, wouldn’t Ark get more confused?

Heh heh heh heh!

That’s right!

“But come to think of it, an opposite approach seems quite easy.”

That’s when I regaled him with stories from Jake’s memory of never selling the copper ring that protected his three generations’ peace.

Confusing? Troubling?

Can’t you concentrate on one thing when you have so much on your plate?

But Ark’s expression in the passenger seat was contrary to my expectations.

“Really? Did you find a clue? For sea, no… soil sales?”

“Haha, somewhat.”

He wore a bright smile as if he saw a new hope instead of dark despair.

How?

How can hearing the story of a ring symbolizing protection give you a way out?

Boastful…?

No.

Those eyes shining even in the dark radiate unwavering confidence.

Instead of hindering him, did I help him inadvertently?

The wind shifted, leaving me in confusion.

This bewilderment persisted until we arrived at Portna.

Upon descending from the carriage, Ark invited me to meet Poseidon together.

“Introducing me as my companion will be fine, so hurry up.”

“I said no, really!”

I inadvertently lashed out in my usual tone, forgetting Jake’s manner of speech, because divine powers work on mortals, not gods.

Poseidon would immediately recognize Jake as Artemis, a peer god.

At that moment, Ark made a rather absurd request of me.

“Please head back to Luna, uncle.”

The request was baffling.

“Commission a few thugs to mess up my business tomorrow.”

How could this fellow, who should be focusing all his energy on completing the trial, possibly talk about a business he doesn’t seem to understand?

And why disrupt it once started?

It was all incomprehensible.

As I drove the carriage back home, pondering various possibilities, the mystery of his request remained foggy.

Ironically, I disguised myself to disrupt things, but the disrupter turned out to be Ark himself.

“Are you crazy? If you just apologize, I’ll cancel it!”

Aggravated by the situation, I clutched the reins and spurred the horses.

The entire return journey, I dismissed Ark as someone insane.

Yet, in the heart of Pandora’s box filled with all hatred and sorrow, the faint hope that he might somehow accomplish this trial with a clever approach lingered despite resistance.

Back in Luna, I quickly resolved Ark’s request.

The hoodlums liked the few coins I handed them and gleefully took the assignment.

“Kihihihi! Uncle, you look plain but are surprisingly devious? Encouraging others to disrupt someone’s business!”

“Don’t be silly. Just go properly to the central square tomorrow, okay? Oh, and if this is any concern, don’t kill Ark.”

“Huh? Ark? Kihihihi! What’ll you do if we do?”

Uncomfortable with my command resembling a threat, these thugs nudged my shoulder mockingly.

“If you try that, you’ll answer to me.”

Frustrated by this unnecessary conflict, I glared at them sharply. The intense gaze could have pierced a large hole in an iceberg.

The hoodlums froze as they saw the crescent moon embedded in my eyes.

“Do well.”

“Ah, yep, yes, sir!”

Realizing from the mood alone that the strongest person in this back alley was right in front of them, the thugs bowed their heads repeatedly like herbivores in front of a lion.

Done with the riffraff, I pinched my nose and left the alley swiftly.

Then I wandered around the market district, enjoying my city’s sights for the first time in a while.

The city of Luna had changed completely.

The streets once choked with trash and filth were so clean now that one could sleep on them with no issues.

All thanks to Ark’s accomplishments in establishing public hygiene.

“That guy… Where is he right about now?”

He must have completed his audience with Poseidon by now.

I was curious about what they discussed, and what conclusions they had reached.

I wanted to hear it all in person, but I couldn’t without revealing my godly identity.

“Shit!!!”

I realized my thoughts were solely occupied by matters concerning Ark lately.

“Why am I so restless about that guy’s business?! So irritating!”

In irritation, I ruffled my hair.

It’s endless.

Everything will be revealed and settled when Ark comes here tomorrow.

Returning to the temple, I reverted to my original form and immediately went to bed thinking about tomorrow.

The next day,

I returned as Jake and headed to the central square.

Though I overslept a bit and arrived late, Ark had just arrived too, setting up his stall.

Inside the box were glass bottles of seawater gleaming brilliantly.

“That’s…!”

It’s unmistakable.

Uncle Poseidon’s blessing.

Even sailors who offer hundreds of gold coins and specialties as tribute can barely obtain one, yet somehow Ark managed to secure it?

Ten of them too!

No, wait.

That’s not the issue.

The task clearly required him to sell seawater to Poseidon.

Why on earth is he selling it to regular citizens of my city?

And Poseidon’s blessed seawater for 1 copper coin?

Is he out of his mind?!

Does he not care about the trial?

What is going on with him?

“Ark! Ark!”

Confused by the situation, I hurriedly approached Ark.

“Uncle, good morning.”

With solemn diligence, Ark greeted me, pausing his work.

That’s his style.

He greets everyone—young and old, beautiful and ugly alike—with the same bright smile.

He is never prejudiced.

This trait provoked unknown frustration within me.

Ark graciously accepts my anger.

The trial is his responsibility, so why must I feel so rushed?!

Grrrr, irritating.

Still, now isn’t the time to let my emotions take over.

I needed to understand what his request meant.

“Whoo-hoooooo!!!”

But the ruffians, strict on timing, showed up right on schedule.

Upon seeing this, Ark advised me to step aside.

Perhaps that’s better.

I want to see how he’ll fulfill this trial.

I stayed hidden behind a building pillar, keeping my eyes on Ark.

“……”

It was a dramatic ten minutes.

From scenes of him begging for his life while being beaten by thugs to Poseidon’s reappearance, promising a rematch with Ark, before diving back into the ocean.

As I stood there stunned, I realized the first lock of the task I placed on him had been unlocked.

“Did that guy… really… accomplish the trial?”

I struggled to believe what I’d witnessed.

Through Poseidon and Ark’s conversation, I vaguely understood the discourse happening in Poseidon’s temple.

Ark moved Poseidon deeply enough to buy seawater for 1 copper coin.

This must have been the first phase.

Then Ark returned to Luna and attempted to sell Poseidon’s seawater to common citizens at practically a giveaway price.

While it might seem bizarre and incomprehensible to ordinary people, as Artemis, I know Poseidon’s personality quite well.

The vast tolerance.

The profound suspicion.

Moved by Ark’s story, Poseidon handed over the blessed seawater.

This was the tolerance of Poseidon.

But our uncle is never soft.

It’s far from over.

Thinking it’s done means sinking to the depths of Poseidon’s sea.

He must have suspected how Ark would use this seemingly free seawater.

It was likely a test.

Perhaps it was driven by expectations for Ark as well.

From the temple to now, Poseidon must have watched closely, ready to summon a tidal wave the moment Ark misused it.

But Ark advertised Poseidon’s seawater selflessly and sold it profitlessly.

Even amidst the intervention of thugs, he remained steadfast, upholding the sea water given by Poseidon against injuries from shattered glass that could have killed him.

The game ends here.

Poseidon, hidden and suspicious until then, must have dispelled all doubts and formed true trust in Ark.

Ultimately, Ark sold the seawater back to Poseidon for 2 copper coins.

With a profit of 1 copper.

This is how Ark’s trial was accomplished.

“Unthinkable…”

A storm raged within me.

Rough waves continuously shook my mind.

Alright, let’s assume he successfully overcame this unthinkable trial.

The problem is the method.

It wasn’t about deceiving a god through cunning.

Rather, it was about embedding his presence and charm favorably in Poseidon’s heart.

Poseidon will likely continue to watch Ark with interest.

He might even help out discreetly when Ark runs into trouble.

But all these are secondary elements.

The most alarming point is…

“Did Ark plan all this deliberately, not by chance?”

Ark.

The boundless wisdom of that guy gives me chills.

Much like Athena, my sister when I was young, his omnipotent image haunts me.

For the first time since I was born, I felt admiration for a human.

What made Ark the way he is?

Why does he go to such lengths?

And for what? The trial reward is merely…

“Huh? Oh, wait… so?”

By completing the first trial, this guy can now speak to me informally instead of using honorifics!

“Hey! My love, Artemis. Want to chew some coffee beans?”

“Fuck!”

The creepy thought makes me ruffle my hair chaotically.

I furiously scratch my goosebumps-covered arms as if I’ve eaten something spicy and violently stomp my feet in place.

As a result, the ground beneath my feet cracked.

Not knowing how to face Ark, I ended up fleeing back to the temple.

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