I Became a Malicious Streamer

I’m a closed-off person.

Not just in my mind, but my entire lifestyle was like that.

I didn’t establish relationships with others unless it was something special, and I rarely went outside.

Even the connections I made naturally dwindled because I wouldn’t reach out.

I hadn’t closed my heart, but I just wasn’t overly friendly—exactly that kind of style.

Because of this, my world was limited.

You could say it was mechanical; whether it was relationships or work with others, I moved exactly as I planned and executed.

Disliking going out, I preferred jobs that allowed me to work from home, and I even made plans to get one.

Fortunately, the gaming industry had plenty of positions like that.

So, what I want to say is that I was originally a planned person.

Before this body came to be.

This body—meaning, after becoming the woman Ji-eun—I realized something.

Living an unplanned life as Ji-eun made me feel that life doesn’t go as planned.

Up until that point, I thought I was just lucky that my plans unfolded as I intended.

But I guess that was partly because I wasn’t particularly greedy.

As I said before, I was a planned person.

The reason I didn’t live like that as Ji-eun is that I realized planning has no meaning at all.

Since becoming Ji-eun wasn’t part of my plan to begin with, why would I set new plans?

Even becoming a streamer and how that took off—none of it was something I knew would happen.

It’s still the same now.

When unexpected events occur, simulating in my head countless times becomes meaningless.

Maybe that’s why I like games.

Not straying far from a fixed framework gives a sense of stability.

Sorry for the long introduction.

So here I am,

“….”

Lost.

I’m sure I’m around here, but where do I go from here?

I’ve always been bad with directions, and it feels worse since becoming Ji-eun.

I have no idea what to do.

I keep thinking maybe I should have listened to Papi Joah in the group Discord who suggested going together, then that thought disappears.

After all, I struggle with relationships.

If the other person is chatty and sociable, I feel burdened, but if they’re quiet, I feel awkward in the silence—what a contradictory human I am!

That’s why I preferred my own stream where I could control everything.

There’s no way I could endure going with someone I just met to our meeting place.

I’d rather join everyone if we were all gathered together first.

But it seems facing uncomfortable situations is inevitable either way.

Looking around to figure out where I was, I checked my phone for the time.

19:54

7:54 p.m. I missed the appointment set for 7 o’clock because I mentioned I preferred dinner.

It might be later than that.

I should’ve contacted people to let them know I was running late, but I didn’t.

I didn’t have their contacts.

I had gotten the team’s contacts on Discord, but I forgot to save them.

In reverse, I also forgot to leave my own contact.

Can’t complain when I deserve the blame for this.

I’ll definitely apologize to my teammates when I see them.

Being an hour late already, being a bit later isn’t a big deal.

It’s all late anyway.

I tried to calm my chaotic feelings.

Yeah, let’s think calmly.

Calm down, calm down.

Even so, I couldn’t calm my heart.

Because,

“Are you alone? We’re a pair, want to join us?”

“Where are you headed? I’m a local here. Can I show you the way?”

“Can I have your number…?”

There are too many interrupting fools.

On a Sunday evening, it’s no surprise that the bustling district is swarming with people.

The population density is too high—it’s dizzying.

With each few steps, men start chatting me up.

Some have tense expressions, some exude confidence, and some act indifferent as if nothing’s wrong.

They all dress differently and speak in various tones, but their purpose is the same.

A desperate struggle to win over an attractive woman, you could say.

“I’m sorry.”

When I say this with a cold expression, most men flinch and step back.

They then return to their friends, chatting or hanging their heads in disappointment.

It’s exhausting.

This may have become familiar over time, but the fatigue it brings hasn’t changed.

“Sigh…”

It was purely my mistake that tangled the path. I couldn’t blame anyone.

I disliked the stares and whispers from people while taking the bus towards the meeting place.

With earbuds in and listening to music, I misheard the bus announcement for the stop.

I should’ve just taken a taxi after earning all that money.

No, then it would just be me and the taxi driver alone.

If I even said a word, that would be more suffocating than anything.

Indeed, going out is a tough job.

Desperate to return home, I kept my head buried in my phone, searching for the way.

I couldn’t turn back after coming this far.

“I found it…”

My desperate efforts were finally rewarded.

Following the map app faithfully led me to the meeting spot.

After cross-checking the name of the store Jacky mentioned with the one right in front of me, I opened the door with a trembling heart.

Ding!

“Should I just order the food first?”

A weighty man looking toward middle age spoke.

This remark came from Cheolwoo, seated in the main place in the room.

Being the oldest among us, and somewhat forced to sit there, Cheolwoo executed that role perfectly.

Someone had to say it; it was practically his responsibility.

Waiting for someone who hadn’t arrived yet was not ideal for a gathering that had already started.

“Uh, so I’ll order Course B? Everyone seems to prefer this.”

Tex pressed the call bell as he assessed people’s tastes.

Everyone finally gathered around half an hour past the scheduled time of 7:00, after the typical “streamer time” delay—don’t expect timely arrivals when dealing with streamers.

Considering this, we actually arrived a bit early.

After a bit of a delay, Tex and Ryuah, who entered with awkward smiles, were the last to sit down.

Except for one person.

“Mollru is late…”

Papi Joah awkwardly remarked.

At that, everyone turned to gaze at an empty spot at the table.

Ryuah, who wanted to get closer to Mollru, had left a seat empty beside her, only for the plate and cutlery to sit there as if waiting for a master.

“They said they were coming for sure…”

“Let’s just wait a bit. They might have run into something.”

“Shouldn’t we at least try contacting them?”

“I, uh, didn’t get their contact.”

They could have easily blamed the latecomer, but it was rare for this group to actually be empathetic.

Just as Jacky rubbed his head for not getting the contact info, everyone exchanged awkward smiles.

The food we ordered arrived quickly.

With a cart brought into the room, the waitstaff began setting down steaming dishes.

Ryuah was all flustered, insisting this had to be filmed, while Cheolwoo picked up the wine saying they couldn’t not drink at such a gathering, and Jacky and Tex laughed and chatted heartily across from each other.

Papi Joah watched the scene, then shifted her gaze outside.

It was winter.

The shortened day had already blanketed the streets in darkness, and the neon lights began proclaiming their beauty.

Inside the room, classical music wafted through the air, and delicious-looking food was laid out neatly.

Now I understand why Jacky had said it’s worth the wait.

Yet, still, I felt a twinge of something missing.

Papi Joah sipped her wine, glancing at the empty seat.

Unknowingly, it seems she was looking forward to meeting Mollru.

“Hmph.”

Thinking of Mollru made her smile slightly.

Well, there was no one quite like that.

Among everyone she had met so far, there had been no one like Mollru, which drew her interest even more.

As she rolled a perfectly grilled steak in her mouth, she wondered again.

Maybe Mollru wouldn’t show up today.

Given that she often acted unpredictably, it wouldn’t be surprising at all if that were the case, and she nodded her head to herself.

Knock, knock.

Someone knocked on the door beyond the room.

A staff member?

“Yes, come in~”

Leaving Tex to mumble his response, Papi Joah continued eating.

The others seemed to share her thoughts, not paying much attention.

“Excuse me.”

The atmosphere shattered in an instant.

A somewhat familiar voice rang from beyond the door, and as it swung open, a woman who didn’t resemble any staff member appeared.

She looked somewhat cold.

If she furrowed her brow while making eye contact, it would trigger an instinct to lower one’s gaze.

Yet the woman, with a blank expression, had something captivating about her, and Papi Joah couldn’t take her eyes off this stranger.

It seemed the others felt the same way.

Jacky stuttered, repeating “uh, um,” as if broken.

Ryuah covered her mouth with her palm, mumbling a small “no way.”

The intruder said nothing, quickly glancing around the room at everyone.

“Hello, sorry I’m late…”

After scanning the room, she bowed her head and spoke, leaving everyone speechless.

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