Come Back

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The news that the first snow would be late this year was true.

A damp fog enveloped Seoul, and the light rain that had started yesterday continued to drizzle all day. It was still the same even now, in the evening.

Knox Hotel, part of the Hanseo Group.

I had promised to meet Park Dong-ha at the hotel’s French restaurant that evening, and Lee Hae-seong and Choi Hong-seo arrived a day early to enjoy some leisurely time together.

The hotel was built on high ground and boasted a cool view even from the lower floors, but because of the fog and rain, only the garden of the hotel right below could be seen.

Standing by the window of his room, Choi Hong-seo recalled the hotel in Jakarta, Indonesia. Jakarta was the place he stayed before moving to Bangkok, Thailand, where he ended his life. The cityscape of Jakarta that he saw from his room there was also blurred and foggy, and there, Choi Hong-seo had already begun to prepare himself for his own end. Consciously or unconsciously.

As the ‘X-Group Scandal’ spread quickly, Go Ji-woon, an idol-turned-actor who was also acquainted with Choi Hong-seo, was accused of being X-Group. Go Ji-woon, who had attempted suicide at home, was recovering in the hospital at the time, and the public was now ready to start hunting for the next X-Group.

The source of the ‘X-Group Scandal’, in which the truth was distorted and re-edited maliciously to the disadvantage of a specific person, was of course Lee Seo-kyung. It was a warning letter that Lee Seo-kyung sent to Choi Hong-seo.

The past filled with blood and pus was sure to cause suffering to Lee Hae-seong. Should he hide behind his power and ask Lee Seo-kyung to take responsibility for the past and sort it out, or should he at least strike at Lee Seo-kyung, who thought he would give in and was just waiting for it to fall into his mouth? Choi Hong-seo had to make a decision.

And the means of resistance available to those who had nothing were limited.

“What can you see outside? The view isn’t that great because of the fog.”

Choi Hong-seo turned around at the sound of Lee Hae-seong’s affectionate voice coming from behind. Lee Hae-seong, fully dressed, was just coming out of the dressing room.

He walked down the hallway, wearing a light blue shirt underneath a V-neck knit, adjusting the strap of his wristwatch. He looked neat but not overly formal, but comfortable. In other words, he looked beautiful in every movement thanks to the dignity and neat behavior that came with it without being overly formal.

It was just as he said.

The facial features, the limbs, the body. More unique than the beauty of the body itself was the way he handled and used it. The way he used chopsticks, the way he drove, the way he spoke softly when talking on the phone about work, and even the way he walked toward her now. He loved all the ways in which Understanding existed.

“What’s wrong? Just staring.”

“It was cool. That’s why I watched it so hard.”

“Hmm… I thought I was used to this kind of compliment. But now that it’s from someone I like, I feel embarrassed all over again.”

“You’re really cool, mister. Whether you’re wearing a suit, like this, or even more casually at home…”

“Even when you’re not wearing anything?”

“……”

Lee Hae-seong asked with a playful hint as he wrapped his arms around Choi Hong-seo’s waist. Feeling each other with their lower bodies touching was always thrilling. After checking into the room yesterday afternoon, they spent a whole day here alone, touching, tasting, and feeling each other, but the passion that blossomed at the moment of contact was always new.

“I think I look the best when I’m not wearing anything.”

“Hoo…”

He didn’t know he would hear such an answer, Hae-seong said with wide eyes, delighted. It was the face of someone who was delighted to hear such an unexpectedly reckless answer from someone he had thought of as a child. He looked down at his lover in his arms and lightly shook the tip of his nose.

“If I have to do it, I will do it too. Is that your exact face?”

He kissed her this time, where he had let go of her hand. His slightly rough and warm lips pressed hard against the tip of her nose. His lips, which had descended to her philtrum, gently cupped Choi Hongseo’s upper lip. Her lips were warmer than her other skin. She felt like she was melting in that warmth. Choi Hongseo wrapped his arms around his back. It was a reassuring hug, like embracing a thick tree with wide and deep roots that would not sway in any wind. The moment they parted their lips, expecting a more intimate kiss, the sound of a bell interrupted the two of them.

“Ah… I guess what I asked for has arrived.”

He ended it with a short kiss instead of a deep kiss, and Lee Hae-seong’s expression clearly showed regret. However, as he turned to face me as he headed toward the door, his face quickly became excited again.

The visitor who appeared at first glance was not a hotelier but an attendant of Hae-seong. Hae-seong, who was returning to the living room, was holding a small, well-packaged box. He said, “Come here,” and stood in front of the table, holding the small box up to eye level.

“What is that?”

“Try to solve it.”

From the moment he half-opened the rustling wrapping paper, Choi Hong-seo’s hands and breathing began to tremble. Lee Hae-seong approached Choi Hong-seo from behind and loosely wrapped his arms around his lower abdomen.

“I had already ordered it when Hongseo came to Bundang, but it arrived now because it was made to order. The manufacturing method is complicated.”

He whispered quietly as if telling a secret, rubbing his lips against Choi Hong-seo’s temple.

Inside the simple box with nothing written on it was perfume.

A unique scent that Lee Hae-seong uses on special order, and that no one else shares. It was the scent that Choi Hong-seo first recognized as Lee Hae-seong’s scent on their first date, when they walked together on Sowol-ro, and it was also the perfume that Lee Hae-seong gave him as a gift after their first sleep. A scent that only Lee Hae-seong and Choi Hong-seo share.

Lee Hae-seong stepped in to replace Choi Hong-seo, who was speechless because he could not easily open the box.

“I know. I used to get upset when I gave you different perfumes in the same bottle.”

Lee Hae-seong hugged Choi Hong-seo tightly and let go, then came over and opened the box.

He was talking about ‘Yoon Hye-an’s’ birthday party. Lee Hae-seong, who took ‘Yoon Hye-an’ to the individual break room, gave her this perfume as a gift. No, this perfume and another perfume that was the same as the bottle.

“It wasn’t just to see the reaction.”

“……”

“At that time, I had already passed the stage of gradually suspecting Yoon Hye-an.”

“At what… stage?”

“Yoon Hye-an had no connection with Choi Hong-seo, and even if she had seen records of our two-person affairs somewhere, she would not have been able to know Choi Hong-seo’s speech. Is it possible to do something like this by imitating him using information she had collected? Such a… confusion without an answer.”

Hae-seong, who took the perfume out of the box, slightly rolled up the sleeves of the black knit top that Choi Hong-seo was wearing. Choi Hong-seo left him to do as he pleased, focusing only on the side of his face.

“That’s why I said number 6. Because it’s impossible.”

“Yes. There are clearly only five choices. No matter how much I think about it, there’s no answer among them. Normally, I’m the type of person who never chooses an answer outside of the choices…”

Hae-seong Lee, who had stopped talking, took a deep breath for a moment. Then he looked back at Hong-seo Choi, who was standing next to him at the table, and met his eyes. He spoke with a faint smile that was easy to miss.

“I chose number 6, and it was the correct answer.”

The perfume was sprayed on Choi Hong-seo’s wrist, which was revealed under the sleeves. Not on the inside of the wrist, but on the outside. The moment it was sprayed, the scent that immediately took over his sense of smell spread to Choi Hong-seo’s memories and emotions in an instant. The scent was Lee Hae-seong, and all of his memories with Lee Hae-seong. He couldn’t help but feel excited.

“I know. I know very well that you are a rational person. So… I didn’t expect it.”

“Do you hate me for giving you different perfume in the same bottle? Was that cruel?”

Choi Hong-seo lifted his right wrist, inhaled the scent from a closer angle, and shook his head strongly. It was cruel, but it wasn’t at all. Lee Hae-seong, who was standing next to him, put his arm on Choi Hong-seo’s shoulder and gently stroked the hair behind his ear.

“Weren’t you really disappointed? The moment you realized that the perfume smelled different, Hongseo… couldn’t hide your expression?”

“It was a little heartbreaking. I thought that the old man was doing that to Yoon Hye-an, not to me…”

“You tried not to hate me while thinking like that?”

Lee Hae-seong turned Choi Hong-seo’s shoulder to face him. A complex face with a mixture of regret and happiness looked down at Choi Hong-seo.

“I don’t hate you. No matter what happens.”

Lee Hae-seong stared into the eyes of his lover who spoke confidently and clearly. Choi Hong-seo’s eyes were free of doubt as he spoke confidently, saying that he could not compromise on loving Lee Hae-seong, even if he didn’t know anything else.

Haa. After a sweet sigh, Lee Hae-seong pulled Choi Hong-seo’s shoulder and hugged him to his chest. With their ears and cheeks touching each other, Lee Hae-seong adjusted his body in his arms several times.

“Just don’t hate me?”

Choi Hong-seo smiled absentmindedly and put his arm around Lee Hae-seong’s back.

“I like you. I love you too… a lot.”

“hmm.”

With a loud noise, he hugged Choi Hong-seo tightly as if he was going to crush him. It was a strength that made the bones in his shoulders and chest feel stiff. If he was held by this strength, it was a strength that made him feel like he couldn’t disappear.

“The perfumes have the same bottles but different contents. These perfumes have different bottles but the contents are the same. Which one do you like better, Hongseo?”

“Of course I like this perfume. I like this.”

“That’s right, Hongseo. Me too.”

“What is it?”

“It’s not the container that matters, it’s the scent. It’s not the outside that counts, it’s the scent inside that counts.”

“ah…”

I didn’t care that it was crumpled, I held his knit in my hands and closed my eyes. I buried myself in his arms, rubbing my face against his neck and shoulder.

“mister.”

“huh.”

“Mr. Haesung.”

“…huh.”

This time the answer came after a low laugh.

“It was you who got me a nice room at a nice hotel during my overseas schedule, right?”

“……”

For a moment, his body stiffened. He realized that the ‘overseas schedule’ he was talking about was before his death. Soon, a soft sigh was heard, and a large hand slowly stroked the back of Choi Hong-seo’s head.

“Because that was all I could do.”

“Don’t say that’s all. You’re the only one who treated me like that.”