Bringing some shocking pranks to the Cultivation World

"Hello, my name is Zhou Li."

The youth in green sat upright on a lotus chair, his handsome face adorned with a hint of a shy smile. He tugged at his slightly oversized white robe, moving with some restraint, yet somehow giving off a feeling of warmth and approachability.

"Young Master Zhou, no need to be formal, everyone has been through this phase. My name is Chun Se, and I will be attending to you now."

The enchanting red-dressed woman in front of him smiled radiantly, her face as alluring as peach blossoms bathed in moonlight, brimming with flirtatious intent. She looked at Zhou Li, her lips seemingly unable to contain their smile.

Between them, a crane-necked jade pot stood proudly amid an array of sumptuous dishes on the stone table. The youth named Zhou Li seemed a bit uncomfortable under the woman's ardent gaze, awkwardly reaching out to pick up the jade pot, he poured a bit of the fine wine into his cup, then hesitated before asking, "This sister, you…"

"I can do it myself."

Watching the slightly awkward yet handsome youth in front of her, the woman couldn't suppress the fire of desire within her. She leaned forward slowly, the perfect curves of her body coming just into view for the young man. As she took the wine pot, her hand, smooth as creamy jade, brushed gently over the back of Zhou Li's hand, her smile teeming with sensuality, convinced that Zhou Li's face was flushing even more.

He's still such a fledgling...

The thought of soon having her way with the handsome man before her made Chun Se's cheeks, smooth as a blown eggshell, uncontrollably flush with redness. She rose to fill her cup with the fine wine, her movements graceful, lifting the cup with a voice as sweet as honey, "Servant will drink first."

After revealing her swan-like neck, her cheeks glowing with an intoxicating flush, the woman fixed her gaze on the young man in front of her, her eyes nearly spinning silk. Without speaking, her red lips trembled slightly, her air of reluctance stoking the flames of desire in anyone who saw her.

"I cannot handle my liquor, let's not."

Zhou Li smiled faintly, putting the cup aside under the surprised gaze of the woman, then tugging at his collar, he said, "Sister, let us retire for the evening sooner rather than later."

"Indeed."

There had been a twist, but it had not escaped his control.

Upon hearing the somewhat anxious words of the young man, Chun Se's heart calmed down, she smiled seductively, speaking softly, "It appears the young master is still somewhat unaccustomed."

"That's not quite it."

Zhou Li lowered his head, saying somewhat embarrassingly, "I've been to other places before, but… I have never seen someone like you, sister."

"Oh my~"

Although slightly disappointed to hear the other party was not a novice, the woman quickly regained her composure, giggling lightly, "Well, since that's the case, now is the time of warmth in the bedchamber, so let's not bother with these trivial matters, then…"

With a tip-toe step, Chun Se leaned on Zhou Li, her supple, jade-like form falling into his embrace. She lifted her head halfway, teasingly whispering, "I wonder which styles the young master prefers? May I first test the depths of your favor?"

Just as Chun Se was about to wait for the young man to partake in unsavory acts, she sensed something amiss. She suddenly felt a swelling sensation in her chest.

Wait a second, he hasn't touched me yet.

What's going on?

"Mainly poison."

Caught off guard, Zhou Li wrapped his arms around the woman's slender waist, the suona in his hand vibrating slightly, emitting a strange sound wave that pierced her ears in an instant, "Otherwise, I probably wouldn't have been able to defeat you."

Upon hearing this, the woman's face changed drastically, and instantly, a ghastly green color enveloped her eyes. She pushed away Zhou Li and staggered back two steps, then clutching her chest, she shouted loudly, "You're a government stooge!"

"Don't jump to conclusions, I'm a contract worker, and enforcing the law while undercover as a contract worker isn't illegal."

Zhou Li patted the poison powder off his palm, speaking to the woman in front of him with a serene smile, "But I haven't lied to you, I indeed haven't seen anything like you before. After all, I didn't encounter a python spirit during my raids on brothels."

"Heh ah!!!!"

With a piercing shriek, the woman's belly suddenly burst open and with the sound of flesh and bone melding together, a massive red python appeared before Zhou Li, its golden vertical pupils fixating on him, the voice full of hatred and as harsh as a knife scrape.

"You cur, I vow to kill you!"

With another shrill cry, the red python's body began to emanate an aura of countless ghastly ghosts, it looked down at the still-smiling Zhou Li, propelling the ghosts towards him, while it suddenly lunged to the left, trying to leave the room.

"The poison takes effect."

Zhou Li watched the giant python as it was about to crash through the window, completely ignoring the malevolent spirits rushing towards him. As he uttered those two words, the snake let out a horrible wail. In a flash, half the python's body hung lifeless out the window, with the other half twitching uncontrollably in the room. The ghastly spirits also dissipated into nothingness.

Meanwhile, the madam outside, noticing something was amiss, bellowed furiously and chopped through the wooden door with a blade, the sound of muscles and bones tearing filled the air as a long snake rushed towards Zhou Li's back with a steel knife in its mouth. Then, she saw the modest young man casually pull out a suona from his chest and blow gently, the snake's body swelling instantaneously, with numerous purple spots of poison appearing on the serpent creature's body.

"You swiped oil to poison!"

The venomous snake's eyes bulged with rage, and a mouthful of old blood sprayed out. After a violent convulsion, the python's body began to rapidly shrink. In just a moment, the snake that could fill half a room turned into a dry snakeskin, with dozens of beads glowing with a blue luminescence scattered alongside. At the same time, a bronze token appeared before Zhou Li.

"One snake, two forms, and even a Bronze Life Token. Seems like this python was rather lucky."

After muttering to himself, Zhou Li stepped forward and fiddled with the beads. He sighed after picking up a white jade bead.

As expected...

Three days ago, Zhou Li had learned from various sources that the Grand Building was dealing in Evil Spirit Jade, which was commonly produced by demons and ghosts devouring human souls. After finding out that Young Master Jie Lao had visited the Grand Building, Zhou Li knew that the man's chances of good fortune over ill were slim.

Now it seemed the eighty-year-old who was still vigorously frequenting brothels would probably only enjoy himself in the next life. Unfortunately, Zhou Li never got the chance to meet the brothel-frequenting immortal.

After picking up the piece of Evil Spirit Jade, Zhou Li walked forward, bent down, and picked up the unremarkable bronze token, then slowly crushed it. The moment the token crumbled, it was as though time stood still, and everything froze in that moment.

It was like an arrow being drawn back to be released, in that frozen instant, Zhou Li's eyes saw a majestic Eight Trigrams Fate Spinner encompassing Heaven and Earth.

Upon this spinner were etched countless fine yet clear seal characters, with immeasurable multicolored threads woven amongst those mysterious glyphs. At the very center of the spinner, eight dull jade stones encircled a carved "Zhou" character on a greenish stone bead.

This was the Eight Trigrams Fate Spinner, the "Golden Finger" that Zhou Li both loved and hated. The space where Zhou Li stood now was a small world within the Fate Spinner. Here, time moved extremely slowly, and Zhou Li could also see those "Fate Lines" hidden within other dimensions.

Three different Fate Lines were quietly twined around the core bead representing Zhou Li. One glowed with a bronze hue, another was a long thread shining with a dim silver glow, and the last one exuded the aura of chaos.

The Observing Destiny Jade, one of the eight closest beads to the core, gradually began to show signs of vitality because of the three Fate Lines.

After Zhou Li crushed the token representing the Bronze Life Token, three bronze threads slowly descended in front of him, gently swaying as if awaiting his decision.

[Detected three Fate Lines]

[Fate Line One - Dianhuo Path: The Dianhuo Sect... A group of maniacs worshiping flames, perhaps they have some substance.]

{Grasping this Fate Line, you'll gain the attention of the Dianhuo Sect, of course, you bear the consequences yourself}

[Fate Line Two - Jinyiwei Corruption: The Jinyiwei... The Emperor's hunting dogs, the officials' butcher's knife, wielding Dragon Tiger Qi but not ranked, how is this different from a civil servant without a contract?]

{Grasping this Fate Line, you'll earn the favor of the Great Commander of Jinyiwei, but be careful, the Eastern Depot is short-staffed, beware they might 'borrow' you}

[Fate Line Three - Devious Immortal Path: Truly not easy, a true Immortal Path practitioner happened to pass by the Grand Building. Oh~~ looking at his Fate Line, the arm of his last disciple is still undigested in his stomach, quite ruthless]}

{Grasping this Fate Line, you'll catch the attention of the Immortal Path family, of course, whether you become a Daoist boy or an ingredient for an elixir depends on your own fate}

"I knew it."

Looking at the three lines before him, each more unreliable than the last, Zhou Li laughed nonchalantly, not taking them seriously at all.

Ever since he first encountered a Fate Line over a decade ago, he knew that this Eight Trigrams Fate Spinner played a game of abstraction, and the Fate Lines it triggered were never anything good.

Of course, if that were its only ability, then the Eight Trigrams Fate Spinner might seem somewhat trashy. After Zhou Li rejected these three Fate Lines, a thread filled with chaotic colors slowly appeared before his eyes.

[Would you like to activate the Intruding Destiny Line?]

The so-called Intruding Destiny Line was a unique aspect of the Eight Trigrams Fate Spinner. Ever since Zhou Li had come to this world, the Fate Spinner he carried with him had mutated. If Zhou Li rejected the normal Fate Lines, the Fate Spinner would provide him with a completely unordered and chaotic Fate Line, and what it would unlock...

Depended on destiny.

As a person who loved excitement, Zhou Li didn't hesitate and decisively chose the Intruding Destiny Line before him, and then, a Fate Line that left him in silence for several minutes appeared before him.

[Intruding Destiny Line: Grandfather has died, but grandfather won.]

[You found Seven Gourd Seeds inside the Snake Spirit's body, the immortal seeds left behind by Young Master Jie Lao. It is said that if you plant the Seven Gourd Seeds in Spiritual Soil and nurture them with the essence of Heaven and Earth for forty-nine days, or if you water them with Spiritual Spring to stimulate growth, you will harvest Seven Immortal Gourds with seven different powers.]

[You can choose to consume the still immature gourds to gain seven miraculous powers, of course, you could also allow these gourds to continue growing, maybe you'll have seven grandchildren calling you grandpa, congratulations on becoming a grandfather.]

Looking at the seed bag that drifted from the Snake Spirit into his hand, Zhou Li fell silent.

Snake Spirit, grandfather, seven seeds.

Oh, brilliant, it can actually be like this.