Bringing some shocking pranks to the Cultivation World

At last, I've arrived.

It has been approximately twenty days since I took on the task of [finding the eighty-year-old brothel expert], and apart from the two days spent on the road, I have been inquiring about the whereabouts of this patron saint of brothels for the past eighteen days.

This was not because Zhou Li lacked ability or means; in fact, if this task had been handled by another Monster Hunter, just finding out where the patron saint first went when he entered the city could take half a month.

So strong, truly too strong.

To this very moment, Zhou Li still held great respect for this elderly brothel connoisseur. He had never seen a person who could visit all the brothels in Shangjing City in just one day, even knowing the turnover rates of each grand brothel. Moreover, this old patron saint was indiscriminate in his tastes, frequenting the upscale Yanchen Pavilion as well as the lower-end Ba Da Hutong (Eight Great Alleys), driven by a heart that embraced all.

However, this caused Zhou Li tremendous inconvenience. His most extensive effort was asking eleven people in one day about the patron saint's tracks, which resulted in information about twenty-two different brothels. Ultimately, Zhou Li had no choice but to utilize his past educational connections and find "Night Unclaimed" in Shangjing City, barely managing to learn of Young Master Jie Lao's last known location.

Shangjing's second-ranked Grand Building.

Upon learning that the Grand Building was the patron saint's final stop, Zhou Li began his investigation of this impressive establishment.

Naturally, Zhou Li adhered to the principle of making full use if he's going to use at all, and bought a huge amount of information about the Grand Building from Night Unclaimed in the city. After learning about the business named "Evil Spirit Jade" being conducted behind the scenes at this establishment, he guessed that the brothel expert's life was likely not to last much longer.

The so-called Evil Spirit Jade was a gem-like treasure formed by demonic entities feasting on men with abundant essence and blood through their internal organs. As a brothel expert whose whiskers had once been touched by an Immortal, the vigor of his essence and blood was likely overflowing, and Zhou Li was totally unconvinced that as a foreigner to the city, he wasn't targeted by the Grand Building.

Standing at the grand entrance to the Grand Building, Zhou Li began contemplating how he should approach "Chun Se," the top girl of the building. According to the intelligence from Night Unclaimed, his target had once aspired to spend a wonderful night with Chun Se but was rejected.

However, on that final day, Chun Se suddenly sent an invitation to the patron saint, who naturally went to her with pleasure. Thus, both Night Unclaimed and Zhou Li unanimously believed that this Chun Se was bad news.

But the question remained: how to approach Chun Se?

Being the top girl of the second-ranked establishment in Shangjing City, such a woman couldn't just be won over with cash. You needed to know poetry, to be charming, to be at least decent-looking, and also wealthy.

Zhou Li met the first three criteria; he could write poetry (thanks to his days as Wen Chaogong), was charming (from his experience in the service industry), and was handsome enough to be described as refined. However, the one criterion he did not meet was being wealthy.

Damn it.

But...

Lifting his head, Zhou Li looked towards a room on the third floor of the Grand Building with an open window, with a flash of ferocity in his eyes.

This would not stump him at all!

In a brief instant, Zhou Li's right hand flicked, and an almost imperceptible white thread shot from his wrist and stuck to the third floor of the Grand Building.

At that moment, Zhou Li, who had already moved to the other side of the alley tightly pressed against the Grand Building, calculated the time and distance. After a brief pause, he pulled hard with his right hand, and his body instantly drew a beautiful arc, landing on the windowsill of the open window on the third floor.

Perfect.

Soundlessly retracting the white thread, Zhou Li reached out his finger, pierced through the paper window, and then his face changed, stricken with shock.

This was bad, something was amiss!

According to the floor plan of the Grand Building Zhou Li had obtained, the room behind this window should have been a servant's room; he could have donned the Servant's attire to blend into the Grand Building, lying in wait to locate Young Master Jie Lao's Evil Spirit Jade before quietly slipping away.

But as soon as he punctured the paper window, he realized, damn it, the Grand Building had been relocated.

This is an outhouse!

Yes, this is an outhouse. Of course, the outhouse of the Grand Building is different from those used by common folks. Whether it's the sandalwood toilet, the brand-new "Qing Xin Talisman" at the side, or the pleasing-to-the-eye potted plants and wall paintings, they all showed to Zhou Li the Grand Building's humane care for patients with hemorrhoids and how terrifyingly lavish the life of a wealthy man could be, right down to his bones.

Just when Zhou Li frowned and was about to leave this place to look for other vulnerabilities, he suddenly heard a series of hurried footsteps. He seemed to realize something and continued to hide by the windowsill, listening attentively.

"Damn it, diarrhea at this hour."

After a series of muffled footsteps, a tall man in luxurious clothing stumbled into the outhouse, pulled down his trousers, and sat on the toilet, his complexion immediately easing. Clutching a roll of silk, he did not forget to mutter his complaints in a low voice while feeling relieved.

"All that talk about Chun Se, and after a few gold hairpins and jade bracelets, you don't even know who you are. And she dares to call herself the number one beauty? When I see her later, I'll definitely need to... Ow~~~~"

Zhou Li wasn't a pervert with no interest in watching a wealthy man relieve himself. The reason he stayed was that the man's muttered words gave him something to consider.

Peering through a hole in the paper window, Zhou Li could roughly make out the features of the man. Age-wise, Zhou Li was about the same as him, but this wealthy man had evidently frequented brothels far too often, his complexion was sallow and his lips purplish-black, clearly from extreme kidney deficiency. After a brief moment of thought, Zhou Li had an idea.

He quietly pulled out a piece of cloth from his waist, timed his move, tore open the paper window, and then, with the strength of his waist, he lunged at the wealthy man who was pulling up his trousers, ready to leave, like a cannonball.

Thump!

Accompanied by a dull sound, the lucky fellow, whose face was a picture of shock and fear due to the sudden turn of events, had his mouth covered with the cloth, and after flailing around like a semi-pickled salted fish, he directly rolled his eyes back and passed out.

"Meeting you is fate."

Seeing that the man was completely knocked out by the anesthetic, Zhou Li didn't hesitate to strip off the man's luxurious clothes and said with pitying benevolence, "Remember that I saved your life, and don't bother pursuing the odd tales of the outhouse."

Regardless of whether the man could hear or understand him, Zhou Li put on the man's clothes and took out a bamboo piece, waving it over the man's face, then over his own. Accompanied by the emergence of Spirit Qi, Zhou Li's face instantly transformed into that of the frail man plagued by kidney deficiency.

Perfect.

Dusting off imaginary dirt from his hands, Zhou Li picked up the man, only left in his underwear, and shook him vigorously, using spider silk to tie him up in a Tortoise Shell Binding. Then, Zhou Li looked out the window, ensured that the alley outside the window was deserted, and hung the man outside the window.

Having done all this, Zhou Li dropped a piece of wax into the toilet. Afterward, he tidied up his appearance, pushed open the door, and with a look of uprightness, walked out of the outhouse.

"Okay, bring Miss Chun Se up now."

Facing the madam who had been waiting for a long time, Zhou Li, pretending to be a lusty young master, said bluntly, "I can't wait any longer."

"Oh dear, young master, don't rush. Miss Chun Se has been waiting for a long time."

With a roll of her seductive eyes and honeyed words flowing effortlessly, the voluptuous madam with a rosy glow leaned close to Zhou Li, whispering, "Chunxiang Pavilion on the sixth floor, right this way~~~"

Zhou Li didn't falter, reaching out to cop a feel, and the madam was only too happy to see this, having discerning taste with a generous pinch. Amid this half-hearted resistance, she led Zhou Li to a peach-colored wooden door.

Feeling the heavy silver in her embrace, the madam threw Zhou Li a suggestive look, then sashayed into the room, apparently saying something. After a moment, she came out and sweetly said, "Young master, Miss Chun Se is inside waiting for you, please enter."

"Thank you, sister."

Zhou Li slipped another ingot of silver to her, copped another feel, and then, under the beaming gaze of the madam, he slowly pushed open the wooden door and resolutely stepped into the fragrant room.

Saint of the brothel above, let me fulfill your unfinished desires!