Yellow Jacket

Classification: Internal Use Only – Executive Tier Clearance Required
Subject: EYNIOBB Composition, Flavor Engineering Constraints, and Psychological Deployment
Document ID: VDC-RS-RED-13X-OMEGA
Date: [REDACTED]
From: R&D Nutrition Division, EYNIOBB Core
To: Legion Supply Command, Citadel Integration Office

RE: Function, Flavor Viability, and Molecular Warnings Regarding the Everything-You-Need-in-One Bug Bar (EYNIOBB)

Confirmed Function:

The EYNIOBB contains every essential component required for complete human survival under combat and deprivation conditions:

Full-spectrum amino acids

Adaptive micronutrient compounds

Combat-ready caloric balance

Neuroregulation agents to suppress violent instability

Shelf-stable for 190 years

Self-hydrating

Does not require chewing or digestion assistance

Public Flavor Narrative:

"Made of bugs for clean, sustainable energy."

Internal Clarification:

The bar contains no insects.

"Bug bar" was a deliberate naming strategy to distract from the far more unsettling reality.

The base compound, Grey Slurry 13C1, is a bio-synthetic slurry derived from reclaimed organic waste, decellularized tissue biomass, and lab-grown tumor colonies optimized for protein output.

Slurry 13C1 is chemically unstable when combined with flavor modifiers.

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

Taste Profile:

The bar's only stable and safe flavor is sadness.

That is not a joke, nor a punishment. It is the result of decades of failed flavor research.

EYNIOBB has attempted:

Neutral

Comforting

Sweet

Savory

Umami

Even emotional tones like nostalgia and hope

All failed.

Joy-based flavors caused psychological destabilization in long-term consumption trials.

Savory and sweet flavors led to emotional rebellion, resentment toward command, and in some cases full mental collapse.

Neutral flavors created apathetic detachment bordering on suicidal shutdown.

Sadness was the only emotion-flavor compound that could:

Be tolerated long-term

Maintain discipline

Prevent emotional corruption

Reinforce compliance under Legion pressure

If there were a better flavor, we would use it. Think of the credits

Dr. Thallus Mure, Lead Compound Engineer

Warning: Flavor Modification Attempts

Attempts to improve the taste have triggered chemical aggression from compound 13C1:

Salt, sugar, vinegar, alcohols: All led to violent flavor distortion and internal bar reformation

Artificial sweeteners: Triggered personality drift and mild amnesia

Cinnamon: Caused hardening to ceramic-like density

Honey: Caused the infamous "bee incident"

"Tasted like angry bees trying to rip their way up your throat and out your skull."
Subject 44.7, post-honey trial

Molecular analysis confirmed pseudo-stinger formation, histamine surges, and neural buzzing hallucinations.

Recommendation: Do not apply coatings, sauces, glazes, or dips. Do not mix with other food. Do not heat. Do not consume with hope.

Legion Usage Protocol:

The EYNIOBB is standard issue for first-year cadets and disciplinary rations for Legionnaires.

Despised universally except by instructors, who deploy it with sadistic precision.

Use Cases:

Punishment for failure

Obedience reinforcement

Post-failure emotional recalibration

Discipline through despair

"Flavor is mercy. They haven't earned it."
Lisa Verdance

Final Notes:

"They didn't fail to make it taste better.
They tried everything.
Sadness is the best we've got."
EYNIOBB Internal Conclusion, Flavor Division Seal Approved

The Bug Bar: Everything you need. Nothing you want.
Internal slogan (not for public release)