NOVEL NEXT 69: Insistently Nice
“I fucking did it!” proclaimed Arnold in the morning. He came down late, because he’d been up late taking the danmaku exam.
“You had sex with Miss Kamishirasawa?” asked Wiki.
“N–no,” he said. “I managed to pass the exam anyway!”
“Congratulations!” I said. Wiki patted him on the back. We both continued to drink our decreasingly-herbal and increasingly-just-boiling-water tea.
“What’s your spell card?” asked Wiki.
“It’s–man, I wish I could just show you,” said Arnold. Wiki never left town for safety reasons, and danmaku would always be illegal within it. “Can I show Jake? I don’t want to ruin the surprise.”
“Go for it,” he said. “But when you get back you’ll have to describe it to me in detail.”
“I will!”
“I’ve got to get to work,” I said. “So let’s hurry. Also, I’m sorry I wasn’t there for the exam.” Youmu and Reimu had pulled guard duty, so it was extraordinarily-well protected even without me. I probably wouldn’t have moved the needle much. Marisa had remained in the village so that all of our bases would be covered.
“That’s fine,” he said. “You guys shouldn’t stay up late when you’ve got work.”
We went to the edge of the town so that Arnold could demonstrate his first spell card. I wasn’t confident enough to run in my leg brace, so Arnold kept pulling ahead. I couldn’t help but notice that he wanted to go an extraordinary distance away from the new fences marking the town’s boundaries.
“You can travel the roads on your own, now,” I said. “You can visit Kourindou. Go to the lake.”
“I’m so excited,” he replied.
“Do you want to fight, or…?” I asked. Simply unleashing a spell card was difficult.
“Sure!” he said. “Don’t worry, my danmaku emotion is not about seducing my enemy.”
“The thought hadn’t crossed my mind.” After I thought about it I felt vaguely that it should have. We’d once had a conversation with Reika about whether ‘lust’ was an emotion that danmaku could inflict on a person. Even if it didn’t make me lust after Arnold, being filled with lust would interfere with my expedition to the Fantastic Blowhole.
Our battle began. My vectors came out in all directions; I wasn’t the challenger here, because Arnold was the one who wanted something from the interaction. I purposefully lowered my danmaku’s density. Unlike Reimu, I wouldn’t crush my training partner just to dispense with my obligations.
Arnold’s pink, spherical danmaku was a bit slower than my vectors, but a bit larger as well. I could walk to avoid them if I was careful. It didn’t take him long to build up the motivation to use his spell card.
“Compassionate Maelstrom: Indiscriminate Admiration!” he shouted as he swung his ax.
Five hundred or more axes appeared all around him. They were like pink glass, ghostly outlines that slowly tumbled through the air. The ax bullets began to fly in circles. I leapt into the air. I had to split my attention to avoid being hit by both his direct fire and the spell card.
I had a few grazes, which made me want to fight him more–but I had work to do that day, so instead I forfeited. I gave a short bow, which Arnold returned.
“That’s fucking awesome,” I said. “You’d absolutely shred groups of fairies with that.”
“I bet I could hit Parsee and Yamame at the same time without even trying!” he said. He put his ax on his shoulder. “Yeah, the critical insight was that I actually admire all youkai, even if I’m not attracted to them sexually!”
“Wait, all youkai?” I asked. “Even Kazami Yuuka?”
“Yeah, but I said non-sexually.”
I felt myself frown. “She tried to murder us!” The sunflower youkai’s red eyes still sometimes appeared in my nightmares.
“You must not have looked at her very closely,” he said. “She was stacked.”
“With killing intent, maybe.” I shook my head. “Sorry, the mortal danger part must have distracted me.”
“To each their own,” said Arnold.
“Wait what?”
“By the way, can I go after Sasha today?”
“Er, I’d really like to try one more time,” I said. “And you were up late.”
“True.”
“If you watch my expedition with Patchouli and Nazrin, that’d probably help you prepare.”
“I will!” he said. “Next week I’m definitely going on my own expedition, though.”
“What if I’ve saved Sasha by then?”
“I was hoping I could help you two anyway,” he said. “Make the rotation a bit longer. Give you more time to practice.”
“I’ll take it,” I said. “Can you use your ax without injuring anyone?”
“Pfft, I’ve been able to do that for weeks,” said Arnold. His training with Youmu and Meiling had paid off, it would seem. I knew he’d been cooking at Lady Saigyouji’s domain to help pay for the lessons. “No problem. I just have to firmly not want to hurt them, and as I just said: I admire something about every youkai.”
—
You’re taking your time today, came Patchouli’s voice through the telepathy crystal. I was walking toward the Fantastic Blowhole, blasting as many fairies as I could. Showing off for Arnold?
“Not at all.” I said. Maybe a little. “Wiki advised me to work up a head of steam before I challenge Parsee again.”
Wiki has that peculiar wisdom of the overconfident, but I think he is correct.
“I can’t see any sort of powerup. Maybe the grazing is doing something?”
Perhaps. The fairies will be helped, if nothing else. I was technically feeding them.
“As long as we are talking about advice, do you have any for me?” I asked.
Danmaku is more powerful when it matches your emotions. Try to hew to what you want to express when you fight.
“So I just gotta tell Parsee and Yamame that I think they’re awful monsters and they should get out of everyone’s way.” I preemptively lit up a bush with danmaku, making the fairies in there all spit at me before we started our fight. “I’d tell them to jump in a hole, but it’s too late for that.”
They’ll do whatever you compel them to. I couldn’t tell if she’d gotten my joke.
–
It was hard to make blasting fairies be about helping humans, but I thought I’d done a pretty good job. I was feeding them, and placating them, so that the next time one of my allies came through they’d have an easier time.
I was also showing off to Arnold, Patchouli, and Nazrin. I could admit that showing my power was part of my motivation. It wasn’t just about helping others; it was about being recognized as a hero.
Doing expeditions wasn’t like practicing with Meiling or running drills with Reimu. There wasn’t an entire class for me to outperform. And I desperately wanted to rescue Sasha and Maroon, but neither of them would see my efforts. I could tell them later, I supposed. All of that made it a bit hard to satisfy my admittedly ugly urge to be admired.
As far as showing off was concerned, the crystal was the only thing that allowed me to do it. Otherwise it would just be me and my enemies who witnessed each battle. That day, there were a lot of witnesses: I battled almost every youkai I saw, and even some I only vaguely heard as I descended into the darkness in the Fantastic Blowhole.
I defeated dozens of fairies and sent Yamame back into hiding. I approached the bridge with more confidence than I’d had in a long time. Then, the green-eyed monster was in front of me. Mizuhashi Parsee scratched her blonde head and glared at me.
“Give me the leg brace,” said Parsee. I was ready; I yanked it off and chucked it at her face. She flinched, which was gratifying, but it hadn’t startled her enough to allow me to taste her fear.
To pull off the brace I had flown into the air a bit, so I landed as gently as possible. My leg could hold me up. It felt colder with only my loose pants around it.
“What now?” I asked. “You got what you wanted, right?”
“I want to see you suffer,” she said. “Your growing strength is unbearable.”
“Well too damn bad,” I said. I didn’t want her to be able to bear it.
“Aren’t you suffering a little bit while wanting to go after that girl?” she said. I grit my teeth. “I wish I could care about anyone that much. Maybe if I did I would be as strong as you.”
“You could always try caring about your allies.”
“I have been trying,” she said, surprising me. And then, as though to snuff out the faintest sympathy that I felt: “If your leg isn’t injured, there are ways of fixing that!”
We leapt into battle. I dodged as minimally as possible, which made my heart pound. It didn’t feel like I was doing more damage, it just felt like I was in more danger. There was also a nagging thought at the back of my mind. I flew up over her and looked down at her and the bridge that could not be crossed.
The thought was pretty simple. If Parsee wanted to care, but simply couldn’t, how evil was she really? It wasn’t her fault that youkai couldn’t feel human emotions. In fact, if she were incapable of empathy it was kind of incredible that the cave troll had decided to work with a group of youkai at all. That she decided to learn language. That she’d talk before we fought.
Was she just lonely down here, after all?
“Malice Sign: Midnight Anathema Ritual,” said Parsee. She shot fast red danmaku up toward me. Where it hit the cave ceiling it turned into blue bullets that bounced and spread out, like a laser kicking off glowing embers. I dodged the stream and the burst, and she quickly fired another at me.
It didn’t matter whether it was her fault. She was in my way. I had to save Sasha.
“Conviction Mines!” I shouted. She, like so many youkai, flew right into one of the bursts.
“You care about her,” said Parsee while shaking her head. “Stubborn. Hopeless. Admirable.”
She was eating my danmaku, so she got some of the emotion. Parsee retreated, so I turned and opened fire on Kurodani Yamame. I’d dodged her opening attack without thinking.
“It’s not hard to care if you try,” said Yamame as she continued to emit danmaku.
“What does a spider know about it?” I asked. I kept grazing and hitting her in return. Yamame ate my stream of vectors with a smile, casting creepy shadows.
Arnold insists that I tell you that many spiders care for their young. Nazrin wants you to know that spiders are tasty. I think I will prioritize improving telepathy, so that they can give you inane commentary on their own.
A bullet hit me, and I felt compelled to submit, but it wasn’t enough to break my will.
“Akiba Summer!” I said, throwing flames at Yamame.
Her shadow disappeared in the firelight. The spider flew backward, a frown on her face and a taste of dirt in my mouth. She was an Earth spider. I chased her, and kept her bathed in flame. She seemed to shrink as her frown grew a bit more frantic.
“You–you’re not very nice!”
“Shut up, you hypocrite!” She’d almost made me crap myself just a few days before. I didn’t like scaring her, but lives were at stake. I had no choice. I tasted something chalky and bitter.
“Stop!” screamed Parsee. She flew forward and tackled me. It wasn’t danmaku: the youkai of jealousy had knocked the wind out of me. I kicked her with my stronger leg and we disengaged.
“I’m fine!” said Yamame. “It’s danmaku!”
“Oh!” said Parsee. Her face was red, and had a cut on it where I’d kicked her. “I thought he was burning you. You were afraid.”
Yamane's eyes sparkled, both her human-looking ones and her buttons. “I knew you cared!”
“Sh–no I don’t!” said Parsee. She fired green bullets at me in bursts. Both of the youkai were battling me at the same time. I dodged from two angles; I was grazing because I had no choice. “I just thought we could kill him early. I got excited!” Or maybe I was in the middle of a fight that wasn’t about me, anymore?
I don’t think you can be jealous of someone without empathizing with them, to a certain extent.
“Not helpful!” I said.
“Why’d you follow me to the surface, then?” said the Earth spider. I tried to fly away, and she kept targeting me, even if she wasn’t talking to me.
“I was bored!” said Parsee. “You were so insistent, it was easier than listening to you!”
“I knew you wanted to talk to others,” she said. “Who else waits by a bridge?”
“I want to kill people.” Both youkai were following me. “Highwaymen wait by bridges!” They continued firing.
“Yeah!” said the spider. “We went to the ‘killing people’ club! Together!”
Tell them they are breaking the rules, came Patchouli’s voice through the crystal.
“You’re breaking the rules!” I shouted. I didn’t know which one to aim at, so I kept switching.
“Killing people is legal!” said Parsee, or perhaps Yamame. “As long as you convince them, first!” A bullet struck me, compelling me to hide, but I resisted. I’d had enough; I was going to shoot them both.
I put up both hands. I let out two streams of vectors, one at each of my attackers. My output had doubled; a piece of cake. Like I’d been ready to do it all evening.
Fucking Wiki, being right all the time. They were caught off guard.
“Hah!” I said.
“Which of us are you fighting?” asked Yamame.
“You tell me!”
Yamame retreated, so I blasted Parsee. Thinking of Wiki helping me, and these two youkai being trapped underground, gave me some inspiration. There was a solution here that might please everyone.
“Youkai Offering: Conviction Mines!” I shouted. The cavern was full of red bursts. Parsee flew into one, and her face became disgusted. Yamame flew back.
“I want to stay here,” she said.
“I don’t care what you want!” I shouted, shooting her with two streams of danmaku. “There’s work to be done!”
“Malice Sign: Midnight Anathema Ritual!” she screamed back.
This time the red streams went in every direction, hitting every surface. The cavern exploded with blue and red light, a maelstrom of danmaku. It collided with my mines, evaporating them over several seconds, but the mines gave me danmaku-free areas to hide in.
I found a narrow path through all the weaponized emotions. I grazed. I knew she was really hesitant about what I was compelling, about what Yamame had been saying, but deep down I thought that she was relieved that someone had stepped in to drag her away from her misery.
Parsee was too proud to admit she wanted to go to the surface. That didn’t matter much to me. I defeated her, and when Yamame jumped back in, I defeated her too.
“Fuck you,” said Parsee, to me. She flew off up the cave.
“No, thank you,” I said, mostly to myself. I was breathing hard. I landed on the cave floor.
“And have a nice day!” called out Yamame as she departed.
“Hey… Patchouli,” I said, catching my breath. The crystal was beside me. “Tell Wiki that I… sent him some goons to help him run electrical wire.”
The irony was almost as delicious as my victory.
—
Patchouli sent Arnold as a messenger. That some of the youkai of the rebellion would show up during the day, with the intent to help Human Town, might take some explaining.
I walked toward a cold city and faced a conundrum. If I put on the winter clothes too early, I’d roast. However, if I put them on too late I might sacrifice body heat that I’d absolutely need if I encountered a vengeful spirit. I decided that every time I felt I was even slightly cold I’d add another layer. A beneficial side effect was that I stopped often, and was able to take in the sights.
Surprisingly, Patchouli’s crystal projection had given me a fairly accurate idea of what the Old Capital was like. The nose-crinkling cold had been absent, and the faint smell of sulfur, but the immense stone pillars wreathed in darkness looked almost as good in the library as they did in real life. The empty buildings of carefully cut stone stood around me like the stacks.
The experience reminded me of a time I went to tour a hospital set for demolition. I was intimate with the location; the hospital had appeared in a VR game after the dev bought the map information from a VR model farm. And yet, the real life version had felt uncanny and strange.
(The floorplans and VR representations had been collected while optimizing point-of-use storage. That hospitals then sold the data to model farms could tell you a lot about the American healthcare system.)
I’d played a competitive shooter in the likeness of the hospital hundreds of times. Walking the real thing had mostly been upsetting, because I was slower and shorter in real life compared to my cyborg avatar. It made me feel small, and weak, and insubstantial, like I had become the render and the hospital had been real. Except, all of it had been real, even my weakness.
The hospital had been destroyed. Ad-hoc reconfigurable robotic clinics were more economically viable.
Jake. Are you paying attention?
“Sorry,” I said, when I realized I’d been shivering. “Should I look for some vengeful spirits?” The place smelled of dust. My nose was irritated by the cold, so the next thing I put on was a cloth mask.
No, came Patchouli’s reply. If you get anomalously cold despite your gear, then we’ll know they are nearby.
“Very well,” I said as I continued to walk through the OId Capital. It didn’t take all that long.
–
I approached the lighted boulevard and suddenly the cold was about ten times worse. My bones creaked, and my skin felt like someone had poured ice water down my shirt. I leapt back reflexively.
“I think the spirits are on the other side of that wall,” I said. It was long and lantern-lined, a divider in the city that was topped by red clay tiles. The light flickered. I stuck my hand out, and it felt like I was plunging my finger into ice.
Proceed with caution.
I took a step forward and began to shiver uncontrollably. Then I ran.
What are you doing?
“G-getting through the cold!” I said, as I approached the wall. I looked around for an entrance, and my eye was drawn to one of the lanterns.
Inside was a tiny skull, with four tiny protruding flames. The skull was staring at me, black-eyed and angry.
“Is t-that a vengeful spirit?”
A little one, came Patchouli’s voice. I put my hand up the lantern; it was warm. Stop dawdling!
I looked around. The lanterns all had tiny spirits in them. The wall had no doors that I could see. It took me a shamefully long time to realize the obvious solution. I leapt and flew over the wall and into a stagnant layer of fog.
I landed in a dark courtyard only faintly lit by lanterns. Two things became immediately obvious. The first was that it was warm; my clothes were sweltering in seconds. I pulled off my mask. The bone-deep chill of the outside was disappearing faster than I thought I could strip naked.
The second was that the courtyard was brimming with oni of all sizes and colors. They stared at me with mustard yellow eyes. There were red oni with huge tusks; blue oni with rippling muscles; green oni puffing on pipes with thin white streams of smoke. Broken chains adorned most wrists and ankles. All of them were shirtless and wearing open kimonos and speedos.
Oh, and they were all male. All except for one, who was facing away. She wasn’t wearing a speedo.
The oni was wearing a plain white t-shirt over a blue-and-red dress. As she turned I saw that she had a single long orange horn sticking out of her forehead. Her right hand held a large red dish full of sake. She was six and a half feet tall, not including the horn.
“Oh ho ho,” said Hoshiguma Yuugi, the oni with the power over the unexplained, and Arnold’s would-be crush. Her muscles were monstrous, and so was her chest. “Another visitor!”