Who Stole My Eggs?

Tiandi planted thunder and lightning in the void like flowers. In order to prevent it from causing further damage, it was tightly bound with a circle of divine power.

As expected, this thunderbolt had a bad temper. It refused to be restrained and rushed and struggled with all its strength.

Unfortunately, what trapped it was the original divine power of Tiandi. No matter how ferocious and fearless it was, it could not break free. Instead, it was tied tighter and tighter, and the “rumbling” thunder gradually stopped.

A few days later, the thunder and lightning seemed to have finally given up. The light all over its body dimmed considerably, and it made a weak “sizzling” sound from time to time, appearing dejected.

Tiandi found it very interesting; this thing seemed to have intelligence. He looked at the weak thunder and lightning and thought of the big dogs that children in the human world loved. It seemed that the big dogs would become energetic if someone touched their heads.

Tiandi reached out to touch it, and sure enough, his hand was pricked again.

“You little rascal, you are so brave! Do you know who I am?” Tiandi licked his burned palms, feigning anger.

Thunder and lightning became erect again, and the lightning flashed all over its body, as if it was threatening Tiandi.

“Virtue!” Tiandi put his hand behind his back, circled the thunder and lightning a few times, then stretched out his hand again and flicked it hard.

Seeing the thunder and lightning bounce back and forth and flash randomly, Tiandi burst into laughter, “I’m laughing so hard; where did you come from?”

The thunderbolt remained silent and was forced to continue standing where it was.

Its angry look made Tiandi even more amused, so he started playing tricks on it even more. From time to time, he played with it, watching it shake its head helplessly while laughing, “hahahaha,” or tied it with magic ropes to create various patterns.

One day, Tiandi suddenly realized his conscience and asked the thunderbolt, “Do you have a gender? Are you a boy or a girl?”

The thunderbolt was exhausted from the torture and could not react at all.

“Hey,” Tiandi touched it again, “Why are you so stupid that you still can’t speak? How about this: if you’re a boy, nod once; if you’re a girl, nod twice?”

It was still ignoring him.

Tiandi coaxed it, “If you were a girl, I wouldn’t bully you. Well… little girls in the human world like to wear beautiful dresses. Can I buy them for you too?”

The thunderbolt felt a chill, shook its body, and seemed to shake off goosebumps all over it, nodding heavily.

Tiandi saw it, waited for a moment, and found that it didn’t nod a second time, finally confirming that it was a brat with a bad temper.

“Okay, boy.” Tiandi clapped his hands. “It saves me money.” Tiandi secretly thought, he didn’t expect this thing to really have a gender; a boy? Then where was its little genital? Why didn’t he see it?

Tiandi turned around to leave. There was a “Zizzizi” sound, and a line of crooked characters appeared on the cloud in front of him, “You have no money at all!”

Hehe, he actually learned how to write, and yet he dared to mock him!

Tiandi glared at it. “Why do I have no money? The whole world is mine.”

Two more words appeared on the cloud, “Haha!”

Tiandi was so angry that he walked away. The thunderbolt spent the day in silence without being disturbed.

Two days later, the Land of Void suddenly became lively. The Deities of the Six Realms came to pay homage to Tiandi, bringing countless gold and silver treasures with them.

Tiandi approached the thunderbolt with a proud look on his face and pointed to pile the treasures next to it, “Put it closer and let it see if I have no money!”

The deities of the six realms looked at each other, not knowing what Tiandi meant, but they still did it.

Treasures piled up into mountains. Tiandi stood proudly on top of the mountain, waving to the people from the six realms to go down, “Let’s go; I’ll call you if I need you.”

Tiandi waited for the thunder and lightning to admit defeat, but it didn’t say a word or write anything.

After two days of guarding the heavy mountain of treasures, Tiandi suddenly felt bored and sent them back to their original place with a wave of his hand.

This move frightened the deities of the six realms. They thought that Tiandi were dissatisfied with these common things, so they racked their brains and searched for many rare treasures, then went to the Land of Void to present them to Tiandi.

Tiandi didn’t want these things, but seeing the earnest eyes of the deities of the six realms, he felt that he had to be kinder and more polite and couldn’t be like that thunder and lightning, casually brushing off other people’s good intentions.

So, Tiandi carefully looked at the rare treasures and picked out a few that were pleasing to the eye. “That’s it; thank you.”

The deities of the six realms looked at each other again. Why did they think that what Tiandi chose were only things for children?

They didn’t dare to ask any more questions, so they took their leave and left the land of void. As soon as they left, the six people gathered together to discuss.

The Deity of the Immortal Realm said, “Heavenly Father is a man, right? Who is pregnant?”

The Deity of the Human World replied, “Nonsense, it’s definitely a man!”

The Deity of the Demon Realm remarked, “Narrow and ignorant! What is the difference between a boy and a girl? Those who could give birth would be able to give birth, and those who could not give birth would still not be able to give birth.”

The Deity of the Ghost Realm interjected, “Procreation requires the union of yin and yang, but is the Heavenly Father a hermaphrodite?”

The Deity of Underworld spoke boldly, “There is no one else in the land of void, only the thunder and lightning. It is the most yang thing. Heavenly Father is born to give birth to all things. It seems like…”

The other deities of the Five Realms all looked sideways: ‘How dare you say that?’