White Flower, Black Feather

Content Warning?: It’s probably a good idea to never read anything that I have written if you are feeling down. Eike (Editor) knows to stop me from going full grimdark, but he is so used to my BS that he has become a little unreliable… so I apologize… and if you see something that deserves a CW: please, tell me to add it

Singing about Rebirth

I sit back in my seat in the cramped row with my highschool diploma in hand, exhaling an explosive sigh, that almost turns into a wince

‘Stressing!’ the mild headache I am having threatens to become more severe, as I feel it starting to pound in my skull and the loud noises around me are not helping

“Chemistry, uh?” the girl to my side accuses me, loud enough for me to hear in the noise of the amphitheater

“It’s one of my options, I am not sure of what I am going to study in college yet” I just try to smile and shake my head

“You better tell me soon!” she pouts before being called and distracted by someone in the front row

I don’t understand why she wants to know… I only see her as a classmate, not a friend, we were in the same group for our final project, but that is it

In fact the only person I am seeing as a potential friend, in the whole school, is the principal that, just now, when he called me to receive my diploma, instead of staying silent about what I am going to be doing for college, he announced, that I was going to go for a chemistry major…

‘Not a bad idea… it could be that, or engineering, or biology, or…’

That aptitude test just confused me more…

‘And I can’t get his diploma until next week… I know is not your fault, but you broke a leg at the worse possible time…’ I sigh again rubbing my forehead ‘I don’t think I will be studying anyways… is this even a true amphitheater…?’

Big room with a series of ascending seats in front of a scenario, that sounds like one… the AC is either nonexistent, or the fact that the place is full of graduating students and their families, means that is not strong enough for the demand

‘Why do they keep using this place?’ I wave some air to my face using my hand, they must know this place is bad for gatherings… years ago they brought us here to see a crappy teenage romance movie and this place was hell then and now

The worse part is being alone…

‘If only that fucking…’ I stop and take a deep breath before my anger shows in my face ‘Try to calm down’ I stretch as much as I can in my seat in the middle of the, cramped, third row of seats, right in the center, facing the scenario, while rubbing the bruise in my stomach ‘You are eighteen and graduated, just survive the last part of the ceremony and you can go… to that place… and rest before… will they let me rest, before searching and finding a job, that let me maintain myself? How is Max going to keep having art classes? What about Jess…?’ I sigh

Looking at the scenario, I see that the preparations for the ending are almost done, some kind of musical performance that got delayed until now, because costume problems, some dude in… dark priest style clothing? Is behind the tables with the teachers giving the diplomas adjusting his drums

Lets hope that the ancient looking speakers to the sides of the platform, can survive a live show… my memories of that movie are minimal, but I still remember the crappy sound quality

-----

Finally the certificate ceremony is over and the members of the band help the teachers in removing the desks and bring the rest of the instruments, a keyboard for a girl in what looks like… an evil nurse outfit? A bass and an electric guitar for two guys in what seem to be… leather combat gear…? Are those real knifes?

‘… what the…?’

“Ugh!” some dude behind me is looking (and sounding) distressed, but a woman (his wife?) is trying to calm him down “Nightmare… swamp…”

“Those are just costumes, it’s okay” I stop looking at them and turn to see the scenario again

I am surprised that our science focused school has a band… they are from another class, so I don’t know their circumstances, it could be just a hobby… but the apparels suggest that they should be in humanities or arts to me… you don’t pull this kind of setup for a school of our level!

‘Where is the fourth dude…?’

The lights dim and the battery guy starts, most people become quiet, but there is still someone talking here and there

…?

Another girl, with a bulky white dress, starts walking from the back of the scenario to the microphone near the front, the dress looks as if something took a bite of the skirt, showing her tall leather boots with red splatters on them, her steps have some authority, even if she is slightly hunched forwards

The other members of the band start playing slowly as she walks past them towards the mike, someone must have fixed the speakers since they are doing their job and the sound is good, the tune is also good, if a tad somber… fitting…

She has a corset hugging her torso, it looks bigger that it needs to be and her lack of chest makes her look… sickly thin, her bandaged left arm, twisted in a weird angle and the fact that her right arm is ‘missing’ below the elbow reinforce the ‘ill’ idea

Even from here I can tell her arm is whole, it’s just tied to look that way. What strikes me as odd are the stiff metal wires attached to her elbow that end in hooks, she uses them to drag the mike stand closer to her face

The guy behind me is breathing really hard, as the woman to his side keeps telling him that is just a disguise

Long black hair, but it can be a wig, framing her face that is covered by a mask, the kind used in those fancy events, that covers her eyes and forehead, she also as a thick shackle around her neck and is dragging a black feathery cape… no… wings?

‘They are really going all out…! But where is the fourth-?’

She starts singing and now the room truly becomes silent, all the hushed conversations that were happening end the moment she begins

‘I… have heard this voice before…’

Is a mournful lyric, about trying to overcome impossible expectations… and become who you truly are…

The more I hear, the more I realize that… I finally can put a name to that voice… but is not going to be her name

‘Coming out like

this to the whole school…’ I can feel my jaw open wide ‘That takes some serious… guts!’

“All I want is to be born, anew~!” she stands tall and whatever is holding her right arm snaps open, dropping the wires and she pulls both her arms forward around the mike and towards us

Inside her dress, even at this distance, I can see the strings of pulleys tensing and dragging her wings to her sides

My heart starts beating faster, my fingers coiling tightly around that useless paper they gave us

“And be free~” the song starts to become more metal in nature, as she does another movement with her arms, making more strings taut and some of the feather move away revealing red crystals behind them, I don't know if they are suppose to be eyes or-

“Monster!”

BANG!

Thunder, right above me, makes me drop everything

Time itself slows as she falls… and something inside me dies, seeing the crimson spray in front of her

I turn around…

That guy… brought a gun here… I am sure that people are screaming, but I don’t really care… I only can feel…

Wrath

Someone else, the father of someone that I don’t care anymore, grabs him from behind, an arm goes around his neck and the other tries to fight for the control of the gun, a gun that now is flailing wildly

Hissing I spring from my seat and sink my fingers on his arm and hand with all my strength, pulling the weapon down towards me, the man that grabbed him stops trying to go for the gun and improves his grab

‘You have done enough damage’ I stare into his lunatic eyes and even if part of me is aware, that this is ironic, I kick him in the stomach while pulling at the gun

BANG!

‘AH!’ I fall backwards and land on, thankfully, empty seats, my left ankle got stuck between two seats and this prison of flesh is tall enough, that even falling over the front row my head still smacks against the ground, sending my glasses away

Being upside down and blind without my glasses, I slowly choke, feeling the pain of my wounds and looking at the shapes in front of me, the revolver is silent on my right hand as a crimson pool starts to form around my left arm… I feel a smile forming…

‘Is this, something you can be… proud, you bastard?’

…

‘I’ll… miss them…’ my smile fades ‘Sorry… bro…’

I become full of regrets and I see… mist? Coiling… towards me…

‘How… is… mist…’ everything… fades…

-----

…

…

“If I could have a few moments of your not infinite time?” a happy voice reverberate against me

It pulls and bends me and I became aware again as I feel something about to crack, surrounded by stars and mist

No… I am in a platform made of mist, in the middle of space? And…

“Hello~” a clown… no, a jester with a plastic smiling mask waves at me…

‘Is this what my brain, while shutting down, makes me see?’ can’t deny that I am disappointed

“My child, this is not a delusion or a mere illusion~” the jester speaks with a happy tone “you died, tied by the ankle, after a mild engage~” his body moves as if an invisible rope pulls him upside down

“I don’t think that is how you are supposed to rhyme…”

“At least I tried~!” he happily exclaims “Just as that poor girl did, before her thunder was stolen!” the plastic mask he is wearing has a smile that is stretched far to the sides of his head and it morphs into a sad face “poor girl that died barely outside her shell, without being able to pick a real name~”

“Who are you?” lets see what my brain conjures in the last moments of activity

“Me~?” he falls and reappears to my side walking with an odd gait “You haven't even looked at yourself~!” I raise my hand and stop

It’s featureless as if made of porcelain, no wrinkles, nails or marks, then it cracks as I try to bend my fingers

“Aaahhh!”

“Hey! Hey! Hey!” he snaps his fingers to get my attention and I do it to avoid looking into my shattering arm “Don’t stare too hard! You just got out of your own shield! There is nothing to keep your Ego in check!”

I look away and something the size of a marble takes my interest

“That is bigger than a marble~! That was your planet~!” his mask recovers its smile

What?

“My dear… You are a soul… there is no speech or thought, you are broadcasting”

You are not even trying anymore

“Or perhaps is you, that now is finally able to understand?” a cane appears in his hand and he twirls it in his fingers

What?

He speaks and I break

Aaahhh!

“Mistake~ I made~!” his mask turns sad again “I am the only one strong enough to pull you from the mist~” he… muscles up, becoming ripped as he says that “But to speak with you, I must do it in a whisper like a whimper~” he deflates like a balloon without a sound and the cane flies away

Ok, sorry, my bad, I know I am useless, what do you want?

“Oh? But is not your fault~!” happy again “Lets call this a serviceable turn of events shall we~?”

You call this good?

“Is not often when a pair of ______” there is a void in his speech and I crack again “Oops~! Sorry~!” the cane comes back from the other side of him, but he grabs it before it hits him

Pair…? She and… I?

“She was like this too~” He nods “But so shocked~” he presses the sides of his mask into a surprised face… and his whole head flies away, but I can still hear him talking from the same place “That away I had to send~!”

You did what?!

“Is okay! Is okay!” the headless body dances “To be born she went~! But you~? Your regrets an anchor made~ Do you what to help~?” he jabs the cane down and I somehow feel a vibration around me

How?

His head comes back from below, but in an enormous size lifting the body and five gigantic fingers appear and curl around me

Yellow fire appears were the eyes should be, behind the plastic face

“First she went, but Last she can be placed” he talks “And only as a Crow, she can Raise” the headless body above points at me with the cane “If you depart~ from the ground you can, catch~ to help her, a person become~”

A bird? Why?

“Reasons that are beyond my grasp~” he opens his mouth and she… her body… is in a metal bed, two surgeons to each side and prepare to cut- he closes his mouth of sharp teeth, before I can see more “You want her, to meet me again~?”

Oh… oh, I know who you are… the cane and the fire are of-

“The time of names is long past~! A schedule we have to maintain~!” the fingers around me ignite into yellow flames burning them down from top to bottom “If still I cannot stay~” his body moves his hips from one side to the other “Why must she wait~?”

Fine! I will help!

He drops the cane and it digs into the mist in front of me as he vanishes, the cane splits and turns into two stems and from the top two green buds appear, I raise myself using all my strength into it, to get closer, as the flowers bloom

“White and Red~! A decision must be made~! One is harder than the Second~!”

Moving my cracking left arm, I curl my fingers around the stem of the White One. And just as I remember his myths, the Red Second vanishes

‘Oh… shit…’

The petals fall and land on me, they keep falling and covering me, looking like… scales as they land one… in top of the other

Everything… fades… again…

-----

Warm

All is dark around me… and… something is pushing me…

…?

I hear a heart…? Screams… and everything keeps… pushing… me!

‘Ow!!!’ too bright! ‘Turn off the light!’

“Aaahhh!” an old woman in front of me screams and falls backwards dragging herself away from me

…!

I try to move, but only manage to squirm uncontrollably

‘What is going on?!’ I try to speak but only a hiss comes out of… my mouth? ‘Why my throat feels so long?!’

…!

A sharp pain somewhere in me makes me move and fall from the bed where I was to a fur rug, surrounded by petals…

White petals… not… scales… white glimmering scales

I move and they move with me, behind me, the old woman stands up and runs to a wall grabbing a broom yelling… something

Another hiss comes out of my mouth and I realize what happened…

‘I got reincarnated as a snake?!’