What Do you Mean All Dungeons are Girls!!!? Enhanced Edition

Misaki settled into her seat and began to read. So far Ivy was still deep in her consultation and nothing was happening. So with one eye on her peaceful dungeon she figured to get to reading. First her homework and then some pleasure. For the homework she had picked a book on goblins, An Adventurer’s Primer on Goblins, was the title.  It seemed like a good place to start with goblins, and she had seen a few other primer titles like it. With a smile on her face, she flipped to the first page and began to read.

So I’m sure you have heard of goblins before. They’re those short ugly green skinned savages which burn farms, raid caravans and steal young women from their beds right? Wrong!

While that description can be true of some goblin tribes. Goblins are so much more than that. First, however, let’s discuss what a goblin is. Goblins are a short humanoid race. Only notable for their high resilience and robust physiology.  This allows them to survive in a wide array of environments, and take punishments that would kill most similar-sized creatures. They also mature at a fairly quick rate, and can mate with most races. 

One of the most important things to note about them however, is their general lack of females. Goblin females are actually known to be exceptionally cute but they are also rare. This rarity, and their high growth rate have combined to make them a bit of a menace. A healthy goblin tribe needs women to grow and replenish their numbers or it will die.

Now what do you suppose a large goblin tribe without enough females is going to do? They have few options, they either acquire more females or their tribe will die. If they have a female already in the tribe, they could hope she births more girls, but that’s not a sure thing. Worse, odds are against it, since most goblins are born male. This leaves getting more girls by force of arms, either by raiding another goblin tribe or attacking the civilized races.

This is why the guild keeps an eye on all known goblin camps. Camps that grow too large and lack sufficient females are prone to start attacking nearby settlements and trade routes. Making them a general threat, and if left unchecked, these large tribes might grow into a horde.

Also as an Adventurer, you might be offered coin to abduct a goblin female. Just keep in mind that doing so may risk inciting a tribe to violence, and many adventurers frown on the practice. If you chose to take one of these jobs, be sure to eliminate all of the male goblins in her tribe so as to prevent the tribe from becoming a danger.

Moving on. You may have heard that goblins rape and abuse the women they capture. Even the children. This is not entirely true and is a case of the stories being exaggerated. Its actually remarkably rare for a child to be raped by a goblin, much less abused. As for older women? Some goblins have been known to be violent lovers, yes, but that’s true of every race. Studies of goblin culture find that most goblins actually treat women regardless of race very well. They are often given comfortable quarters, multiple meals a day, a warm bath if possible. In fact they are typically showered with the greatest luxuries the tribe has to offer. Not only that but if they get sick or injured the shamans will spare no expense to care for them. In exchange, they are expected to make love with male goblins of the tribe and bear children. 

So what about children? How are they treated? Well young girls taken by a tribe often end up being treated the same way a goblin girl would be treated. She will be showered with luxuries and status from the moment she enters the tribe. With personal attention given to her by the shamans. One of which will be her personal mentor and teacher. These girls will later become a tribal princess and priestess. An important leader of the tribe, and often the personnel mate of the tribe chieftain.

Speaking of the tribal leaders, goblin leadership is made up of the oldest and wisest goblins of the shaman caste. Note the use of the word caste. Goblin tribes are divided into several castes. Magic goblins, which are often smarter than the rest of the tribe, join the shaman caste. In addition to the shaman caste, there is the warrior caste, the gatherer caste, the hunter caste, the builder caste, the caretaker caste, and the breeder caste. Goblins due to their short lives have little time to learn and grow. As such they are often raised from birth into the role they spend their life in. Only through evolution do they have a chance to change their lot in life

Speaking of evolution, Goblins have one of the most diverse evolution trees out there. Allowing them to grow in a wide array of powerful evolutions like the High Goblin or the Hobgoblin. Both of which are strong goblin evolutions with fairly decent lifespans. Whereas a normal goblin can live around twenty to thirty years, barring an accident, these evolved goblins can live for nearly a century and have much more impressive physical bodies even if they remain small.

Misaki closed the book. It was an interesting read. Goblins seemed to be more civilized and smarter than they were often shown to be in books. It took a certain amount of brains and patience to groom children into the roles described here. She recalled that Asarya had a goblin girl that she had adopted and it made her wonder how the little one would grow. It was a shame that goblin females were apparently rare as well. Perhaps something to look into? Misaki set the book down. There was more to read, but she wanted to read something else. She grabbed another book. Cultures of the World

The Drow are one of the Elven Races and are rarely encountered on the surface. They are the deep dwelling cousins of the Dark Elves and are most often found in the depths of the Underdark.

There are a number of Queendoms in the depths of the world ruled over by Drow Queens or Matriarchs. The Drow are a highly matriarchal race and hold females in very high regard. Women dominate their society and can be found in all major strata of their society. Often with high positions, whereas men are often treated as lower class citizens.

One of the most well known cultural beliefs of the Drow is related to clothing. Where the higher one’s rank in society the less they wear. As such Drow royals are often nearly naked and wear only highly enchanted clothing. To the Drow being naked is something reserved for the gods and those blessed by them. Traits like Nature’s Embrace and its counterparts are seen as a blessing by the gods and those that have them are forbidden by the Drow to even wear clothes. As to wear clothing with a trait like that is seen as an insult to the gods and the Drow respect their gods deeply.

All of the known Gods of the Drow are also female, which is perhaps part of why the Drow so heavily venerate women. These goddesses are also always depicted as naked. The Drow pantheon also has ties with that of their cousins, the Dark Elves, and some goddesses are shared by both. The most well known of the shared Goddesses is the Dark Goddess Akulie. Akuli is a motherly fertility goddess with an apparent love of lesbian relationships. She will often bless those who love other girls. Supposedly her blessings are magnified for young girls who were previously male and cursed into a female form. It’s her way of helping these newfound girls.

Another major goddess and well known Goddess of the Drow is Lathe the Feathered Spider. Supposedly the daughter of a half-drow harpy and an Arachne Demon of lust, she rose to godhood, becoming the goddess of Music, Hunting, Trapping, and Seduction. Lathe is a well-rounded goddess but not without a dark side. Her song is a powerful lure and her traps are devious. She is known for stealing newborn babes from their mothers. For what purpose, well only the gods know, but she does have a preference. Baby girls, as she will never take a baby boy. In the drow lands, she is both loved and feared. She is used as a story to make young drow behave. For more on Lathe, I would recommend Rise of a Feathered Spider, a lovely book which details her early life and eventual rise to Godhood.

The last of the most well known of the Drow Goddesses is also one of the more Mischievous gods in the world. Makulie. Often depicted as the younger sister of the Goddess Akulie. Her domains are Mischief, Pussies, and Lactation. She is well known for enjoying inflicting minor body alterations as pranks. One of her most well known pranks was when she ‘blessed’ every single female in the town of Lasar with a lactating pussy. The blessing only lasted a month before it thankfully expired.

Misaki paused as she tried to picture that. It wasn’t exactly an image she had ever thought of before. Who would want that anyway? She did not envy those girls having to deal with that for a whole month. Like some kind of weird period. Then something drew her attention and she set the book aside. It seemed Ivy was finally done with her consultation.