Wanderer of the Zerg

Chapter 46: Ellis felt a suffocating sensation.

Ellis felt a suffocating sensation; he almost instinctively wanted to run away, but his feet felt as if they had rooted into the ground, unable to move.

Meanwhile, Xi Tian had already invited Posie to sit inside the house.

Ellis stood there in a daze until Xi Tian called him in, his voice filled with ease and delight.

Xi Tian and Posie sat across from each other, discussing things since graduation.

“I haven’t seen you since graduation. I heard from classmates that you didn’t even attend the alumni gathering.”

Posie, with an elegant demeanor, said, “I went back home after graduation. Surely, you knew that, didn’t you?”

Xi Tian replied, “Actually, I didn’t know.”

Posie smiled gently.

Even Ellis thought his smile was so charming.

Posie said, “You’re still the same, not changed at all.”

Xi Tian also smiled, “There has been some change. This is my mate, Ellis.”

Xi Tian took Ellis’s hand and had him sit next to him.

Posie looked Ellis up and down, nodding repeatedly, “Just as I thought, you still need a mate to take care of you. But didn’t you say in college that you didn’t want to marry and wanted to be a single noble?”

Xi Tian responded, “When it’s right, you just end up together. I also said I wanted to be a great scientist in elementary school, but that didn’t happen either.”

Posie found this amusing.

Ellis did not want to listen to their conversation, but his hand was firmly held by Xi Tian.

The cheerful voices and laughter in front of him reminded him of the times that Xi Tian and others had experienced without him.

His heart felt as cold as a river thawing in March.

Ellis’s hand was slightly sweating, damp and cold.

While chatting with Posie, Xi Tian kept handing him a handkerchief, holding his hand with both of his own.

Despite Xi Tian’s body being cooler than his, Ellis couldn’t bring himself to pull his hand away.

Xi Tian liked to talk, easily engaging in any topic. When faced with unfamiliar areas, he would show patience, listening attentively and responding occasionally.

Conversations with him were never boring.

In the past, Ellis had liked this trait about Xi Tian; now, he found it irritating.

If Xi Tian’s topics were a bit duller or his attitude a bit cooler, their conversation might have ended by now.

But instead, they continued to chat endlessly, exchanging words.

Xi Tian’s enthusiasm for Posie was matched by how closely he interacted with Ellis.

It felt like being whipped while being fed honey.

Ellis felt three parts sadness, three parts anger, and three parts despair.

The remaining part was self-despondency.

Xi Tian and Posie laughed and reminisced about college days, work environments, and travel experiences.

They had many things in common, were charming, and acted elegantly.

They also complemented each other well, with Xi Tian’s meticulous patience and Posie’ laid-back attitude.

Even Ellis now felt that they should indeed be a perfect pair.

In the past, Xi Tian had never shown such intimate behavior towards anyone other than him.

This gave Ellis confidence: he was special.

But now, Ellis couldn’t stop imagining other things.

His marriage with Xi Tian seemed nominal. Xi Tian wouldn’t let him get pregnant, and though he clearly sensed Ellis wanted to leave, he still chose to keep him here.

Did Xi Tian really want him?

Did Xi Tian really want to marry him?

Females were not rare to Xi Tian; whenever he beckoned, numerous females would flock to him, offering all their possessions.

Perhaps Xi Tian really did want to marry him once, after all, they had gone to the registration office.

But now, maybe Xi Tian had changed his mind, thinking he was still unsuitable as his mate, preferring another female, or even thinking it’s better to have more partners.

It was even more likely that Xi Tian thought he had outlived his usefulness, wanting him to understand the situation and leave on his own.

Ellis felt disheartened, lacking the energy to listen to their conversation, only wanting to escape quickly.

Yet, Xi Tian’s hand remained tightly gripping his, and his gaze never once turned towards him.

Rutherford’s distant, melancholic words resurfaced:

“Male zergs are all driven by their lower halves; they always eat from the bowl and look at what’s in the pot.”

But Xi Tian was different from other males; from the first meeting, he had always seemed so unique.

Ellis anxiously glanced at the people around him.

I want you to turn your head and look at me.

I want your attention to shift away from him.

I don’t want you to want anyone else.

I don’t want you to give to another what you once gave to me.

But more than that, I fear losing you.

I fear you might leave without a second glance,

I fear you will eventually see my flaws,

Please don’t make me leave you,

Do whatever you want, as long as you’re happy,

Just don’t leave me.

Ellis felt as if his vitality was being drained, like a campfire burning out, leaving only a few sparks.

Posie, sitting opposite, immediately noticed Ellis’s change and signaled Xi Tian.

Xi Tian glanced back at Ellis, but Ellis did not return the gaze.

Ellis sat there obediently, motionless.

Xi Tian realized he had pushed things too far.

He quickly pulled Ellis up and took him to the bedroom, closing the door tightly.

In the familiar environment of just the two of them, Ellis felt his breathing return.

He hugged Xi Tian tightly, continuously whispering in his ear, “Don’t leave me.”

Xi Tian, feeling anxious, hurriedly comforted and soothed him.

In the past few days, Xi Tian had noticed that Ellis seemed troubled. He had seen the female’s hesitance, the constant glances towards others, and his conversations with Rutherford.

Xi Tian could hear noises from dozens of meters away. Before he could even tell Ellis, he had already learned that Ellis didn’t trust him enough.

The shock of realizing this conclusion was that maybe he hadn’t been good enough to make Ellis feel secure. Meanwhile, he felt a bit angry, wondering why Ellis thought he was the same as others, untrustworthy, and wouldn’t even come to him with concerns.

He would discuss anything with Ellis, but why wouldn’t Ellis come to him with his doubts?

Meeting Posie was purely accidental.

But this gave Xi Tian, still angry, a chance to retaliate.

He wouldn’t let Ellis leave, forcing him to see their conversation.

Ellis’s restlessness gave him a sense of vindictive pleasure.

However, he never intended to scare him.

Xi Tian’s reason finally returned, summoned by his fragile mate’s anxiety.

Ellis’s anxiety even made him feel guilty, questioning why he hadn’t just told Ellis directly.

He was no longer a child; why act out like one?

“Ellis, what do you think of Posie? How do you find his looks and personality?”

Ellis had not yet calmed down but answered honestly, “Posie is very beautiful and has a great personality.”

“And how do you compare yourself to him?”

“I—I can’t compare to him.”

Xi Tian placed his hands on Ellis’s shoulders, his tone serious, “My judgment in choosing people has always been good. He was my choice in the past; you are my choice now and in the future. I never doubt my choices, and you shouldn’t doubt your significance to me.”

Ellis nodded absentmindedly, still immersed in his dismay, too overwhelmed to consider the meaning behind Xi Tian’s words.

“Posie is a friend from my past. We separated because our personalities didn’t match. Both of us prefer being taken care of rather than taking care of others,” Xi Tian said, drawing Ellis closer. “He’s already married. Didn’t you hear what he said? He’s here for a vacation, and his husband will arrive later.”

Ellis mumbled, unsure of what to say.

“Ellis, I chose you, and you chose me. We have a long future ahead. If you have any doubts or concerns, you must tell me. We’re bound to have conflicts, as our thoughts aren’t always aligned. I can’t know what you’re thinking, and you can’t know what I’m thinking. If we rely only on suspicion and guesswork, we won’t last long.

No matter what, I promise to listen to you and share my thoughts with you. No more guessing, okay?”

Xi Tian’s gaze was earnest.

“…Master,” Ellis spoke up, as if making a sudden decision. He asked quietly, “Do you still want me?”

Xi Tian nodded.

“Will you want others as well?”

“Right now, I only want you.”

“Then,” Ellis asked softly, “what about the future?”

“With you, I won’t need anyone else.”

“Will you really not be interested in anyone else?”

Xi Tian placed a gentle kiss on him, “With you, I can’t imagine wanting anyone else.”

In all the days they had shared, amidst countless people coming and going, you were always the brightest star in my eyes.

When they walked out of the bedroom, Posie was already bored, having removed his accessory terminal and started playing games on the projection screen.

He saw the two of them holding hands and blinked, “You’ve made up, huh?”

“We never really had a disagreement,” Xi Tian replied with a smile.

Ellis felt a bit embarrassed, still thinking that his recent outburst was due to his own loss of composure rather than Xi Tian’s intentional behavior.

“Why don’t you stay for a meal? You’ve only had a glass of water so far.”

Xi Tian pulled Ellis back to sit down, leaning on him just like before.

“Aren’t you on vacation? Why worry about a meal?”

“Talking to you is pointless.”

The former friend, clearly accustomed to Xi Tian’s previous behavior, remembered being outmatched in their university debate club, and it was even more so now.

Posie extended his hand to Ellis, introducing himself again, “I’m Posie Vaal, using my husband Lyd Vaal’s surname. We recently got married and are here for our honeymoon.”

Posie chuckled, “You, like my husband, obviously know how to take care of people.”

Ellis, feeling awkward, shook Posie’s hand and glanced back at Xi Tian.

Xi Tian gave him a soft smile.

Ellis’s face turned red.

**Author’s Note:**

The source of this conflict was a lack of communication. Xi Tian was determined to improve their communication, but Ellis was unaware.