Two and Half Men - Reborn as Jake Harper

Her eyes almost popped out when she saw the number, and she screamed, "225 THOUSAND DOLLARS???!!"

Everyone in the room froze. Rachel's mouth was wide open, Phoebe slowly blinked like she wasn't sure if she'd heard it right.

"Is that even legal for a high school party?" Chandler muttered.

Monica just stared at me in silence, still holding the paper as if it were radiating heat.

Rachel was the first to break the tension with a half-laugh. "You throw that much money on a school party? What do you even serve? Gold-plated pizza?"

Phoebe giggled. "I bet even the napkins have better self-esteem than I do."

"Guys... seriously," Monica said, her voice finally coming back. "Jake, this is too much. You're a teenager. You shouldn't be paying for this."

"Aunt Monica, I'm rich rich. My end-of-year party will be for a thousand guests."

"Come on, I have eight bodyguards all the time (so at least 3 times of that in total). I fly on a private jet now. Hey, I even gave my friends cars as birthday presents. I bought two Lexus SC430s and two Minis for them," I said casually.

Yeah, Fredddie choose a Mini…

"What???" Monica screamed, incredulously.

"Oh, and I gave my family cars too. They're all driving Ferraris or Lamborghinis now. So a wedding party is a fair gift," I added

"Wow, we've got a Bill Gates 'godnephew' and didn't even know it. I mean, we all knew you were rich, but not that rich," Chandler said.

"Nah, I'm still far away from Gates. At most, I'm like Ralph," I joked.

"WHAT???" Monica, Chandler, and Rachel shouted in unison. Phoebe and Tasha probably didn't fully grasp it.

Rachel blinked twice, then leaned forward on the couch. "Ralph as in Ralph Lauren? You're saying you're on that level?"

I rubbed the back of my neck, trying to downplay it a bit. "Okay, maybe I went a little overboard. Just... got carried away, I guess."

"I don't know if I believe you. I mean, which one is a lie?" Rachel said, narrowing her eyes.

"My friends said the same. Yeah, I have this handsome face and posture of a billionaire, right?" I smirked.

"And the humility too," Chandler added sarcastically.

Monica nudged him with her elbow. "Don't talk bad about our handsome nephew."

"Handsome billionaire? That only happens in Rachel's book," Phoebe chimed in. "In real life, they're old and ugly."

"Phoebe!!" Rachel screamed.

"What kind of book are you reading, Rach?" I asked her with a mock smile.

"None of your business," she said, lightly slapping my arms.

The group kept chatting, laughter bouncing between the walls. Chandler made a sarcastic remark about champagne fountains, while Phoebe argued the cake should be shaped like a unicorn. Rachel seemed to be mentally picturing herself as the maid of honor

But Monica—Monica was glowing.

"I want an elegant ceremony under fairy lights. And maybe Jake can sing during the vows! We could have a string quartet for the aisle and a jazz trio for the reception. Jake, can we do a custom dance floor? And I want a cake so big it needs its own table.

Oh my God, I'm actually getting married! This will be my dream wedding!" she gushed, grabbing Chandler's hand with sparkly eyes.

I smiled, but quietly slipped away to the balcony. Tasha followed me without a word.

We took our good time on the balcony, mostly kissing under the stars, wrapped in each other's arms while the cool breeze drifted around us.

---

The next day, I returned with Tasha to Monica's place for lunch. It was already buzzing with voices when we arrived. Ross, Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel, and Joey were gathered in the kitchen, chatting animatedly.

"Look who finally decided to show up," Chandler said, raising his coffee cup toward us.

"Jake! Tasha!" Monica called looking way too excited for someone holding a knife. "You're just on time. Joey was about to eat all the appetizers."

"Hey!" Joey said with his mouth full. "That's slander. I was only tasting them."

"Hello everyone!" I said with a bright grin, offering a casual wave as I stepped into the room.

"I'm doing Beef Wellington, risottos, and Tournedos Rossini," Monica announced proudly from the stove.

"I love it all!" I exclaimed. "Love you, Aunt Mon!"

"Everything for my favorite nephew," Monica said with a smile.

"Hey!" Ross exclaimed indignantly.

"I still love Ben," Monica replied quickly, trying not to laugh.

"Thank God Monica is your favorite, Jake," Chandler joked. "If it were Ross, you'd be broke by now—with all those weddings."

We all laughed, while Ross glared at Chandler.

"What about me, Jake?" Rachel asked playfully, tilting her head with a teasing smile.

"I will gift one for you, Rach, if you have a good groom. You don't have the best track record, you know?" I said with a grin.

We all laughed, while Ross suddenly said, "Hey!!", making us laugh harder. Poor Ross is always the butt joke

"So where is your uncle?" Phoebe asked, remembering I had said I came to New York with him

"Guess?" I replied with a knowing smile.

"With a girl," Rachel said certainly. "But he could've brought her here, we wouldn't mind."

"Nah, that's when coincidences happen. And I found out just before it could. Her name is Janine Lecroix—Joey's ex-roommate." I spoke

"He is with Janine?" Ross said, incredulous and a little envious.

"That's not a coincidence," Joey finally chimed in. "I gave him her number."

"What?" we all shouted, surprised.

"He was nice back in L.A., took me to some cool places," Joey explained with a shrug.

Monica clapped her hands. "Alright, food's ready!" she said cheerfully, walking over with the first plate.

She set it down right in front of me. "Jake first. It's the least I can do after what he's doing for my wedding."

"Not complaining," I said with a wink, already grabbing the fork.

"Me neither. As you know... I'm part of the wedding too," Chandler added, placing a hand on his chest with mock pride, making everyone laugh.

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