Transformation or Death

Chapter 62



Memory Recovery (8)

Yesterday, Red Vega heard shocking news. 

It was none other than Han Jae-jung’s past.

A shameful secret even hidden during counseling, a process of looking deep into one’s inner self.

“So! That bastard gained a sense of superiority through his magical girl girlfriend, the trash!”

Despite Pink Deneb’s warning, White Davi shared what she knew about Han Jae-jung’s story.

“…I see. Thank you, Davi.”  

“You can call me Haru-chan if you’d like! Vega!”

Red Vega let out a deep sigh of distress. Feeling proud that she had been helpful, White Davi continued in a friendly manner.

“Be careful too! Such psychopaths don’t change easily! Through counseling, they’ll take root in your fragile heart and try to control you!”

“But…I was the counselor…”

“That’s dangerous too! They’ll try to evoke pity with a weak appearance to get closer to you!” 

“He hasn’t…contacted me for days…”

“That’s dangerous too!!! It’s the silent treatment! A sordid tactic to make you depend on him!”

It was hard to believe the story.

That Han Jae-jung was the infamous Blue Sirius’ boyfriend.

Even when Red Vega was still in elementary school, in an era before the internet became widespread, she remembered hearing about this incident. 

She recalls various stories circulating on TV news back then too.

Even after getting familiar with the internet, she never bothered to look up the drama.  

To Red Vega, a fan of most magical girls in the world, Blue Sirius was also an object of admiration.

While trolls occasionally brought up ‘that bastard’s’ story, she mostly brushed it off as nonsense.

Just as few people bother digging up drama about celebrities with a favorable public image, Blue Sirius was a nationally beloved magical girl.

Rather, the perception was that she was the victim, so bringing up her dating history would be tantamount to re-victimizing her, which deterred many from doing so carelessly.  

Hence, while Red Vega knew the outline of the incident and the existence of ‘that bastard’, she didn’t know the details since it was an almost 6-year-old case.

She was aware of some leaked KakaoTalk conversations and his school violence records, but not his face or name.  

However, thanks to the knowledge shared by White Davi, she was now able to connect Han Jae-jung to the vicious ex-boyfriend from that relationship.

“…Really…Jae-jung was…?”

“Sniff, you’re already being gaslit… It’s okay! There are plenty of other men out there! With your looks and status, you can pick whoever you want…”

“That’s not it.”

Despite her cold response, White Davi remained cheerful.

“Vega! Find a better man! You can’t be with this abusive gaslighter!!!”  

Red Vega couldn’t accept the damning labels attached to Han Jae-jung’s name like a scarlet letter. She found it unsatisfying and uncomfortable.

“But, in front of me he’s never shown…ah, no, he hasn’t shown any violent behavior…”

She couldn’t immediately deny it when confronted. Red Vega rubbed her abdomen with her hand, a habit she developed from mocking him during her hospitalization.

“Anyway, he hasn’t shown any!”  

“Vega. Even the infamous mass murderers of old were said to be warm around others! Humans are two-faced! They can show a demonic side to some!”

Red Vega’s shoulders trembled as she recalled his past as a Watcher.

But she shook her head vigorously, rejecting such temptations.

“All humans are demons! Devils with angel wings! Heh, didn’t I sound cool just now?! I’m so coooool!!!”

If what Han Jae-jung did was true, those insults were justified. But if it was false…

The agitated state Pink Deneb showed implies something happened in that past relationship.

That the truth is not just what was made public.

Red Vega made up her mind.

She would remain neutral until Pink Deneb returned today and explained the situation.

‘If what he did was true…’  

What should she do? How should she treat him? No, he wasn’t the only issue. There was Blue Sirius too, the kind older sister who cared for her a lot. How could she face her?

‘Deneb told me not to tell Sirius…’  

Though she didn’t fully understand yet, she got a sense of why Deneb said that. If an ex-lover received counseling for such a complicated matter, it would surely cause turmoil.

At the same time, she wondered if keeping it from Blue Sirius, the most closely involved person, was ethically right.

In the end, it was a problem with no clear answer.  

In times like these, it’s easier to just follow instructions.

“Don’t be too sad, Vega. You have me, your one and only soul friend!”

Red Vega wished Pink Deneb would quickly return and explain everything. 

And now, here she was, standing before Han Jae-jung himself.

The reason was simple.  

She couldn’t get any explanation from Pink Deneb. After successive intense battles, Deneb needed rest – her own choice.

Apologizing, she said she would explain later.

The flames of curiosity couldn’t be extinguished. The frustration was unbearable.

So, Red Vega decided to visit Han Jae-jung’s house directly.

His address was listed on the counseling questionnaire after all!

***

Ippotranslation

***

“It definitely settled in your heart, right? Then I’ll settle at home now too.”

“Your behavior is not good. An unkind heart is welling up in my heart too. Isn’t it rude to come to my home without saying anything?” 

As she tried to naturally enter the house, I blocked her way with my arm to prevent her from intruding.

Red Vega tilted her head, seeming to protest that it didn’t make any sense.

“But we’re close?”

“Ah, don’t say that.”

“Oh, so that’s how it’s going to be?”

I grabbed the arm she had placed against the wall with both hands and brought it to my abdomen. A faint warmth felt through the thick fabric.

“…Really, you’re not going to let me in?”

I desperately closed my mouth that was about to ask how long she was going to keep this up. Since it’s my karma, I’ll just accept it sweetly. 

“Really~?”

I moved the hands holding her arm slightly up, down, left, and right, and then quickly. At the same time, I brought my body closer. Her coat creased from my hands.

When I tried to put my hand inside her coat, she quickly pulled her arm away.

“Oh my. Don’t tease an adult like that.”

“I’ll be an adult in a month too, you know.”

“Just because you’ll die someday doesn’t mean you can go rummaging around now. You’re still a brat right now.” 

At those words, Red Vega broadly raised the corners of her mouth.

“Yes. You’re right. I’m still a brat now.”

Then, like a villain revealing their identity in a comic, she chuckled and grabbed the hem of her coat.

“Do you know what’s under this coat?”

“What? Did you wear a crop top or something? You’ll be cold in this weather.”

“No. Are you a pervert, Jae-jung? You didn’t sexually harass Sirius like this, did you? You shouldn’t have.”

She’s saying that because she saw me wearing skimpy clothes in the original work… It’s really sad that she’s treating this simple concern as sexual harassment.

As I swallowed down this sadness, Red Vega undid the top button of her coat. Leaning her upper body forward and opening the gap with her hand, she showed me what clothes she was wearing underneath.

“…I’m wearing my school uniform.”

“Ah, yes. That’s a wholesome outfit befitting your age.”

What’s her point?

“If I keep refusing now, I’ll take off my coat and cry in front of the entryway. If you don’t want to be seen quarreling with a high school girl in winter…”

“Then come shooting in like a comet.”

I immediately let her into the entryway. Although they say this is a high-risk area for deviants, all the weirdos around here are even weirder weirdos. And I don’t want to be labeled an even weirder weirdo than them. 

Especially not labeled a pervert.

“Hmm… this is quite… a vintage room! It has a sense of stability!”

“Just don’t comment on the room.”

“Why not? A room like this is where I lived back in the day.”

As she looked around the room, she flinched at the bloodstains inside.

“This is…”

“It’s my blood, don’t worry about it.” 

“Phew, for a moment I thought you’d brought in another magical girl besides me and beaten her up a few times~ I was about to get jealous!”

“Why would that be something to get jealous over…”

“Because then someone else would have my weakness!”

“You’re not hiding your lewd desires anymore. You don’t act like this with other fellow magical girls, do you? You shouldn’t.”

I threw her mocking words right back at her.

“By the way, I don’t have things like tea or anything. Just water…”

“It’s okay! I brought some!”

Red Vega smiled and took out some cocoa powder from her bag.

“You really are thorough. Give it to me. I’ll boil some water right away.”

As I filled the kettle with water, I glanced sideways at Red Vega. The sight of her trying to take off her coat but putting it back on due to the cold air with no heating was both silly and cute, making me laugh. The school uniform I glimpsed was just an ordinary blazer, shirt and necktie.

Seeing the school uniform brought back old memories.

Seol-hwa was so pretty back then.

I had wanted to be with her at least until graduation.

But in the end, I ended up getting my high school diploma through an equivalency exam.

I wanted to reminisce about those various memories, but all that remained were scars, not images. Like staring blankly at the melancholy of a puzzle with only the outlines and no picture, I was lost in sorrow when the sound of the kettle boiling reached my ears.

A screeching, ringing sound.

As I made the cocoa, I twisted my parched lips and opened them.

“Curious about my old stories? About when I was dating Seol-hwa?”

“Huh? Yes, yes! That’s right… I heard that you, Jae-jung, bullied and abused Sirius back then… That you were a really bad guy…”

“You heard something like that?”

I laughed and placed the cocoa in front of her.

“Well you got that right.”

“Yes… yes?!”

“If it was a ghosting breakup, that’s bad enough, isn’t it?”

I just placed hot water in front of me.

“Then let me explain what happened.”

***

Ipootranslation

***

He calmly revealed the truth that had been entangled in his love story. 

The actions he took for the sake of Blue Sirius, who was suffering from the incident.

The manipulated articles, the disappearance.  

With an observant attitude as if reading a book, he reported the facts in a calm but deep voice. The story ended around the time the hour hand moved from 11 to 12.

Red Vega quietly pondered the truth he revealed.

“That must have been really… Difficult for you.”

“How difficult could it have been for me? Those who have gone through this bastard going missing have had it much harder.”

She realized the gap between the current Han Jae-jung she had seen and the past Han Jae-jung she had heard about from others.  

He had been thoroughly sculpted from the beginning to look that way. Sculpted to make people curse at him, to look like a bad guy when seen.

The truth was a marble carved and painted into a splendid sculpture, deceiving the eyes. 

She also realized why this truth had not been revealed until now.

If one of the people who knew this truth came forward, it would cause a manipulation controversy and the truth would quickly be revealed. 

However, the problem stemmed from why this manipulation was carried out in the first place.

The controversy over Blue Sirius’ favoritism was the beginning of this whole incident. If she thoughtlessly took Han Jae-jung’s side again, the favoritism controversy would only worsen and make things harder.

Not ending the suffering, but continuing it.  

Moreover, it would nullify his determination and once again make both Blue Sirius and Han Jae-jung look bad. It would even draw attention back to him, who avoids others’ gaze, inflicting indescribable pain.

‘With Sirius’ personality… She probably didn’t seek him out on purpose, thinking the reason he was suffering was because of her.’

For a while, she probably wanted to give Han Jae-jung time to overcome his suffering. She must have thought that one of the reasons he left was because he had angered her.

“…Can I ask one more thing?”

“What is it?”

“Why… Didn’t you go back? If you parted that way, it must have been difficult for both you and her.”

Even if she didn’t know, Blue Sirius might still be suffering. Red Vega asked carefully.

“That’s right. Why is that?”  

His voice changed slightly. Unlike the flat tone from before, there was a hint of sadness, like the sea breeze.

“…It’s already this late. You should eat lunch soon….”

“Ah, yes, yes! I know a great place, let me take you there!”

“Ah… about that….”

Han Jae-jung smiled bitterly.  

“I don’t think I can eat together. I have something to do from now.”

“You slept until 11, what work could you possibly have!”

“You’re right. Actually, I just want to rest. Also, I haven’t showered yet, and I need some time to get ready if I’m going out. I feel bad making you wait. I smell of sweat since yesterday. Doesn’t it bother you? I’m sorry, I’m a bit out of it.”

“Jae-jung, you don’t smell…? Ah, let me take a whiff.”  

“There’s no need to go that far….”

Suddenly, she brought her face close. Han Jae-jung flinched and pulled back.

“I smell of sweat too! …Want to smell?”

Red Vega grinned mischievously, then used her foot to step firmly on his leg. Gradually, her foot moved up his leg towards his abdomen.  

“Please don’t talk nonsense, Vega…”

“Why did you correct yourself? And don’t ignore my warm consideration in letting you know that everyone has body odor!”  

“That’s not warm consideration, that’s hot abuse. Don’t stick your smelly foot out. Aheh, move it! Anyway, have lunch with your colleagues.”

Red Vega was starting to enjoy teasing Han Jae-jung.  

“I want to rest for now.”

He quietly refused her suggestion. Soft, but firm.  

Red Vega knew that even if she brought her stomach to his face, he wouldn’t back down (she had practiced this while sunbathing in the hospital), so she reluctantly backed off with a sullen look.

“Hmph, it’s a really delicious place. Not very famous, so it doesn’t come up easily when you search. A hidden gem with a great atmosphere and plating.”  

“That must be delightful. Please enjoy it thoroughly on my behalf.”

“I’ll ask you to take me there later, but you won’t do it. This is my only chance.”  

“Don’t be so petulant. Don’t try to get the joys of consumption, service, and charity through me. Just go over there….”

He elegantly gestured towards the front door. Finally giving up, Baek Ah-hee sighed deeply and stood up.  

“Alright. Since you said you bled too… Oh right, should I treat you? I’m good at first aid. Come on, quickly take off your top.”

“Get out.”  

“Yes.”

With a mischievous smile at his firm statement, she nodded obediently.  

“Thank you for telling me, it must have been difficult to speak about. If you want to reconcile, let me know anytime! No, even if you don’t have any particular feelings, let me know!”

“It wasn’t that hard when I think of it as an extension of counseling. As for contacting you… I’ll actively consider it.”

In fact, he was under considerable stress even from phone calls. He had telephone phobia. Resolving to let her know if they had a chance to meet again, he waved goodbye.  

The creaking sound of a rusty hinge rang out, and left alone in the room, he quietly gazed at something.

A belt orbited around him in the shape of a ring. It repeatedly transmitted one piece of information to his mind.

[Move to the designated location.]  

“Got it.”

It was a quest.   

A quest to move to a designated location and make contact with someone.

The location was transmitted in the form of a map. A place painted entirely in black. Land designated as uninhabitable for humans. Abandoned land.  

Restricted area. Outcast zone.  

Collectively known as the Dark Matter.

He touched the neatly folded note from Pink Deneb in his pocket.

“I should… call her.” 

He needed to assure her that he was safe now, to put her mind at ease.

But he still dreaded using the phone medium. The screaming voice of Jo Ah-yoon from yesterday rang in his head.  

In the end, he turned on his phone, left a brief text message, and turned it off again. 

It would be better to talk again after learning more of the truth.  

If oblivion was insanity according to Virgo’s words,

Then the current Han Jae-jung must be the maddest person of all.

He then proceeded to shower, bandage his injuries, and change into clean clothes.

It resembled a purification ritual to cleanse denial.

***

Ippotranslation

***

This place was dark even though the sun was out. Tall high-rise buildings had collapsed, connecting streets like overpasses. They cast huge shadows on everything underneath them. 

The villain in the waiting spot looked up. Broken windows reflected the sunlight in a kaleidoscopic spray of light.

“I wonder when they’ll come…”

Under the hood, full lips traced the fishing line, legs wrapped in a broad robe swinging back and forth.

“When will the blind little lamb come…”

Humming a merry tune, sweetly sublimating the time of waiting.

In one hand, holding a belt buckle, endlessly waiting for someone to arrive.

For Every 3$,Ill upload a Bonus chapter within the week.

Anyways… Happy Reading!!!

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