The Unbelievers

Chapter 35

“…Will you keep living here, ahjussi?”

“I suppose so. It’s my house.”

“And I… will move out somewhere else?”

“Isn’t that what you want?”

“Yes, but who will I tell if there are noises at night?”

“…”

“When there are strange noises at night… who should I tell then? There are strange noises sometimes, you know.”

“A security team will be assigned.”

The man who used to kindly indulge Eunseong’s behavior seeking his attention was gone. Yoo Siwoon was now declaring that he would no longer tolerate any more erratic actions from his fifth cousin nephew who had gotten too familiar and become tiresome after being treated well. He showed no interest in why Eunseong had run away or left home.

Eunseong looked at him resentfully before asking the question he had been holding back:

“Aren’t you curious why I left home?”

“You said you hate me.”

Unlike last night, he responded matter-of-factly. Unlike last night, he showed no signs of being upset or emotionally affected by this fact. He was covering himself with something like a cold, emotionless glass wall.

“That’s right. I hate you, ahjussi.”

“So I’m letting you live separately. What’s the problem?”

“Nothing. There’s no problem at all.”

“If there’s no problem, then let’s eat now.”

Yoo Siwoon spoke coldly, as if saying they had nothing more to discuss and to shut up and eat.

“Yes, we should eat. Everyone tries so hard just to eat and live, after all.”

Eunseong said he would eat diligently, boldly grasping his spoon and scooping up rice. After just eating for a while, he seemed to think of something else and put down his spoon with a clang, saying to Yoo Siwoon:

“So from now on, when there are strange noises, I should tell the security guards, right?”

“Yes. Do that.”

“And not tell you, ahjussi.”

“We won’t be living together, so there’s no need to tell me.”

“Right, there’s no need to tell someone you’re not living with about such things.”

“That’s right, there’s no need.”

“I understand completely.”

“…”

“Thank you. For your concern. I’ll definitely repay your kindness someday.”

“…”

Eunseong clenched his fist tightly under the table. His eyes shone brightly, as if very excited. His eyes gleamed with anticipation for the day he would live apart from Yoo Siwoon.

Yoo Siwoon’s gaze, which had been fixed on Eunseong’s face, was withdrawn. Separated by a great distance, they ate their unappetizing lunch reluctantly, heads bowed as if trying not to look at each other.

∞ ∞ ∞

As he brewed coffee after waking up in the morning, Yoo Siwoon looked at the opposite side of the island table. He had prepared milk and an apple out of habit, but Eunseong hadn’t shown up.

They had always spent mornings together until now.

As he drank his coffee, which tasted particularly flavorless today, and idly checked his phone for any messages, he heard footsteps.

Thump thump – footsteps that sounded like an advertisement of sulking approached. Yoo Siwoon didn’t raise his eyes.

“…”

Eunseong came in, roughly pulled out a chair, and sat down with an intentionally loud noise. He grabbed the milk and gulped it down noisily, then bit into the apple with a crunch.

Today was the last day of final exams. Whether he studied well or not, Eunseong was in his third year of high school and couldn’t keep missing exams. They had pressured the school through Director Nam to allow him to retake the exam he missed yesterday. Since it was difficult to persuade the school over the phone when they refused due to fairness issues, Director Nam had to visit the school in person.

Eunseong glanced at Yoo Siwoon, who was standing and drinking coffee, pretending not to notice. Anyone looking would have thought he was glaring at him.

“…The sparrows, is it okay not to feed them? Someone will need to take care of them when I move out.”

“…”

“I used to scatter rice grains around. Can you do that instead?”

Yoo Siwoon, who had been looking at his phone without answering, raised his head. He was covering his tattoo today too, saying it wasn’t good for Eunseong’s emotional education. If he was going to cover it, he should do it properly – the parts peeking out only stimulated more curiosity to see the rest.

It wasn’t right to want to see the naked body of a relative elder. Nevertheless, Eunseong kept feeling anxious to see the wolf that he was hiding.

“I’ll do it instead from now on.”

“Don’t scatter too much, okay? Just a little bit around, because they shouldn’t smell humans. Don’t skip it because it’s bothersome.”

“…”

Although sparrows probably don’t eat things like rice grains, Yoo Siwoon nodded that he would do so.

“But, while I’m still living here – of course I’ll be moving out the week after next – but before then, if the eggs hatch, that would be good, but if they don’t by then, could you take pictures and send them to me? I want to see the babies.”

“Tell Director Nam about it.”

“But that’s a personal matter. Why make Director Nam do something like that? He might get fed up and quit if you do that.”

“Wouldn’t you dislike it more if someone you hate sends you such pictures?”

“…”

Eunseong looked at him with an expression that seemed to ask how he could say something so cruel and harsh. Yoo Siwoon pretended to be nonchalant and took a sip of his remaining coffee. The coffee had gone cold.

“Are you saying you don’t mind receiving pictures you want even from someone you hate? That’s not very consistent.”

“…This is why I hate you, ahjussi.”

“…”

“Does it make you feel good to talk like that?”

Yoo Siwoon felt like the worst person in the world even though he hadn’t said much. Eunseong bit his lip hard and threw away the half-eaten apple without finishing it.

Eunseong left the dining room with his bag even though Director Nam hadn’t arrived yet. As he flung open the front door, he ran into Director Nam who was just coming in.

“You’re out early. Did you eat? Is the CEO inside?”

Director Nam, looking energetic in the morning, greeted Eunseong casually and said he would go in to greet Yoo Siwoon before work, asking Eunseong to wait a moment.

Eunseong got in the car first. His mood, which had been sour since yesterday, worsened even more. In any case, Eunseong was the one who had done wrong to him. He had tried to apologize by speaking to him despite the awkwardness, but he didn’t expect to be rebuffed like that.

I really won’t have to leave, right…?

After making such a fuss saying he would leave and didn’t want to live together, if he now said he didn’t mean it, Yoo Siwoon might think he was strange. He might even notice that Eunseong liked him. He absolutely couldn’t let him know. Maybe it would be better to just leave. It might be for the best.

Director Nam returned after greeting Yoo Siwoon and got into the driver’s seat, starting the car.

“After you finish today’s exam, you’ll take a makeup test for the one you missed yesterday. Did you study a bit?”

“What? Why do I have to take the one I missed yesterday?”

“The CEO said to make it possible for you to take it, so I barely managed to arrange a makeup test by threatening the principal. So work hard.”

Eunseong thought he might be able to hate him if he treated him harshly, but Yoo Siwoon tried to diligently fulfill his duties and obligations whether Eunseong hated him or not. He tried to provide a good environment and cared about Eunseong’s emotional education. This cousin uncle, whom he had never met before, was trying to give him care he had never experienced even from his own family.

“…This is why I hate you, ahjussi.”

Eunseong muttered sadly.

The streets quickly passed by the car window on the way to school.

“Where could you find someone like our CEO? If you knew how much the CEO cares about you, you might regret acting like this later.”

“That’s why I hate him. Because he’s good to me.”

Director Nam looked at Eunseong, who kept saying incomprehensible things, with a meaningful gaze.

“You hate him because he’s good to you? Would you prefer if he treated you badly? Like your father?”

Eunseong glared fiercely at the back of Director Nam’s head as he drove. Though he must have felt the gaze, Director Nam remained calm. He just raised his eyebrows as if to say “What are you going to do about it?”

Eunseong glared at him once more for bringing up his father and touching a sore spot, but there was no point in arguing with him about it. Eunseong soon gave up and said:

“He’s only being good to me out of a sense of duty. Because he has to keep his promise.”

“Keeping promises isn’t as easy as you might think.”

Director Nam was talking as if Yoo Siwoon was making some great sacrifice. Eunseong wondered what real sacrifice he had made besides giving up one empty room in his large house.

Eunseong was alone at home more often than not. The man who was supposedly so good to him only came home early once or twice a week, and on other days he returned after Eunseong had fallen asleep, so they could only see each other for barely 10-20 minutes in the morning while he drank coffee, out of the entire 24 hours.

Yoo Siwoon was practically neglecting Eunseong. He was the kind of person who used tongs to place a wet towel on Eunseong’s hot forehead when he was sick, trying not to let their skin touch. It wasn’t right to speak as if such a person was making sacrifices for Eunseong. Under the excuse of mysophobia, Yoo Siwoon was hurting Eunseong. That’s why Eunseong had been moved by just one photo of a mother sparrow he sent, mistakenly thinking he was a very kind person.

“Then why make promises you can’t keep?”

“…I see. If it’s a promise you can’t keep, you shouldn’t make it in the first place, right?”

“Of course.”

Director Nam nodded to himself.

As Eunseong got out of the car at school, Director Nam told him to do well on his exam. Eunseong, who had been keeping his mouth tightly shut like a clam trying not to answer, reluctantly opened it to say goodbye to him before heading towards the school gate.