NOVEL NEXT Chapter 85
Chapter 85: Regrets and Apologies
I stared at Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom, who had appeared from the thicket, and expanded my senses to scan the surroundings.
Fortunately or unfortunately, there was no sign of anyone around.
In this vicinity, it was just me and Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom, or rather, Jeoksawol, the two of us.
“······Senior, you have once again violated the taboos of the Martial World.”
I said, looking straight at Jeoksawol.
I never expected that after being blocked from one account, she would resort to creating multiple accounts.
“That’s······.”
Jeoksawol trailed off.
She avoided my gaze as she spoke.
“······I’m sorry.”
Jeoksawol apologized in a small voice.
Well, someone with pride higher than the sky like her wouldn’t be used to apologizing.
I looked at her and said, “What brings you here at this hour? The matter with Heukryongbang should have been settled by now······.”
“I’ve left Heukryongbang.”
Jeoksawol answered my words.
“······I heard the news that you won the Orthodox Faction Competition. Congratulations.”
Still avoiding my gaze, she gave me a meaningless congratulation.
I never thought I’d experience being congratulated by the top of the demonic factions about the Orthodox faction’s victory.
“Thank you. So the reason you sought me out is······.”
“Not for the Gongdong Sect, but I have business with you.”
“What business?”
I countered as I looked at Jeoksawol.
I had some guesses but there was no need to say them out loud.
Hearing my words, Jeoksawol bit her lip and said, “······Nung So-ja wants me to relay a question and your answer to her. She wants to know why you haven’t been visiting Gonhwa Pavilion lately.”
I had an inkling this would come up.
So it’s that issue again.
Regarding Gonhwa Pavilion, honestly, thinking about the rumors she spread that made me look like a lustful fool still didn’t sit well with me.
A lustful fool! A colorful horse! I am not a slave to the desire that dominates the brain with lust and sensuality.
I, Lee Cheol-soo, am the master of the Color Spectrum. The path I pursue is to seek pleasure for both body and mind, not mere physical pleasures.
However, due to these rumors, I had already been turned into a lustful fool indulging in licentious behavior.
Not to mention, I had been warned by my Master to refrain from contacting Hao Mun for a while.
Now was the time to keep my distance.
After all, I had no use for Hao Mun in the near future.
I turned my gaze back to Jeoksawol.
Her crimson eyes were gazing at me.
“······Because of the rumors the other day, I was advised by my Master. I was told to avoid mingling too closely with the demonic factions until the rumors of me as a fool die down. So I suppose I should stay away from Gonhwa Pavilion for a while.”
“······The rumors······.”
“About Nung So-ja and me, and Seomun Cheong-ha being in a love triangle.”
Upon hearing my words, Jeoksawol fell silent.
Her eyes trembled.
“······I know that too. Now I will say what I want to say. Is the rumor true that you are having an affair with Nung So-ja? I heard she called you Gaga. It’s ridiculous to say ‘Let’s enjoy the cloud and rain’ to me and then secretly be with Nung So-ja?!”
She asked me.
Jeoksawol bit her lip. Her shoulders trembled.
Now was time to push Jeoksawol away in our playful banter.
She still had not revealed her true identity to me.
Thus, I could not trust her either.
As I had resolved before, I had no intention of becoming her trophy.
“······Of course, what I said back then was sincere. I still think Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom is beautiful. But.”
“But······?”
“I already have someone in my heart. Therefore, please forget the cloud and rain pleasure I mentioned before. I don’t want to hurt Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom’s heart with a meaningless one-night fling. The woman in my heart is not Nung So-ja. As for my relationship with her······ I once thought it could develop into something good, but since the rumors spread, I think it will be difficult to meet for a while.”
“······If it’s not Nung So-ja, then who? It can’t be Geumhu, can it?”
“I would never propose to a woman I don’t mean it to.”
Upon hearing my words, Jeoksawol bit her lip.
Her shoulders shook.
She turned her back to me.
“······But there’s no rule saying you can only have one wife······.”
Jeoksawol said with a trembling voice.
How did she know I was planning to have multiple wives?
I felt a slight chill inside but didn’t let it show as I continued.
“Of course. But that aside, true cloud and rain pleasures can only be enjoyed when both hearts connect.”
“······That means······ you mean to say with me and not Nung So-ja, we don’t share that connection?”
“I like honest women. And······ From now on, if you have something to say, have Nung So-ja come directly. Don’t send someone else.”
“······.”
Jeoksawol remained silent.
She should have understood by now. As long as she doesn’t come to me as her true self, I cannot fully trust her.
“It’s late now. It’s time for bed. If I don’t go, my brothers will start to worry. So I’ll take my leave.”
Now it was really time to sleep.
My older brothers, who worry about me for no reason. If I came back later than usual, they might even get up and come looking for me.
And if they saw me face to face with Jeoksawol, or if Jeoksawol were to do something to my older brothers…
Neither side would yield anything good.
“Wait, for a moment······.”
“Have a good night.”
I cut off Jeoksawol’s words and leaped away.
I needed to prepare for the Hangshan Sect Competition in a year.
Thump thump!
‘I need to find the remains of the first Hangshan Sect leader too.’
The Heart of Heart Sword, one of the legacy treasures of the old Sword Pavilion and the lost treasures of the Hangshan Sect.
I planned to retrieve it in a year and become a benefactor to the Hangshan Sect.
Even if I win the martial arts contest against Geumhu, the relationship between the Hangshan Sect and the Gongdong Sect is one of underlying resentment.
Moreover, 80% of the Hangshan Sect disciples are fans of Geumhu, and So Geom-hu is like the club president.
It would be impossible for me to make Geumhu my woman without facing internal backlash from the Hangshan Sect.
To eliminate that backlash, I had to become indebted to the Hangshan Sect.
As for Jeoksawol······.
It would take time for her to reveal her true form.
With those thoughts in mind, I headed to Cheongun Pavilion.
*
Seeing Lee Cheol-soo throw himself into the night without a second thought, Jeoksawol bit her lip.
Thud thud.
Her body sliced through the night air of Gongdong Mountain.
Right now, she wanted to go somewhere with no one around.
Jeoksawol thought that way as she wandered through the treacherous mountain terrain of Gongdong Mountain, eventually arriving at a babbling brook.
A bright full moon rose in the sky.
Reflected in the moonlight, the water of the brook showed the appearance of Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom.
As she removed Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom’s mask, what lay beneath was the true form of Jeoksawol, who contested beauty beyond the world’s standards.
Her unparalleled beauty, reaching the domain of seduction arts, revealed itself under the moonlight, seemingly more beautiful than a celestial fairy.
Seeing her own reflection, Jeoksawol bit her lip.
“······What a bad bastard.”
There was a hint of moisture in her voice.
Jeoksawol lowered her head.
Drip, drop.
Tears flowed ceaselessly from her crimson eyes.
“Truly, the worst in the world······.”
Sitting by the brook like a painting of beauty, Jeoksawol’s tears soaked her sleeves.
If it were her real self, not Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom, if he had called her beautiful, she would have accepted it.
Honestly, she never thought of seeking true cloud and rain pleasures, but still······.
However, he rejected her.
He stated he had someone in his heart.
The one she disliked and didn’t want to acknowledge but was involuntarily jealous of, was Geumhu.
Tears dripped down Jeoksawol’s face.
“······What does that young girl have that I don’t?······”
She had proposed to him because he had captured her heart.
Upon hearing those words, Jeoksawol felt a painful tearing sensation in her chest.
She barely held back the welling tears and shaking voice. All her accumulated tears poured out.
She could never show such a side to others.
“······What is lacking in me······ Why did he call me Hyangmae······.”
Hyangmae.
He had definitely called her that. He had called Nung So-ja that and had patted her head too.
The sensation of that time was still vivid in her mind. His warmth enveloping her in his embrace still ignited her body.
Thump.
Thinking back to that day, which had now become their last meeting, Jeoksawol’s heart began to beat painfully fast.
Just recalling him made her heart race. It thrilled her, igniting unfamiliar feelings she had never felt in her 60 years of life.
And now, she felt an unfamiliar sadness as well.
She had never felt such emotions for someone else.
Her origins were humble. Her mother was a washed-up courtesan, and her father was a mystery. From a young age, the beauty she was born with was a curse to her. Her mother, jealous of her beauty, sought to harm her. She tried to sell her as a courtesan.
Thus, she left home. She didn’t want to become a courtesan. She didn’t want to be bound to anyone. But to survive, she ended up becoming a performer.
She hated the world.
Every man approached her with lust. Every woman envied her beauty.
There were countless times she faced danger because of her looks. Attempts at kidnapping became so common she gave up counting.
So, for her own safety, she joined Hao Mun and learned martial arts. Fortunately, she possessed the talent bestowed by heaven, allowing her to achieve remarkable progress quickly.
However, even her master, who had taught her martial arts and treated her like a daughter, fell for her beauty.
When she had ended her master’s life, who had intruded her room in the middle of the night out of lust, betraying the bond of master and disciple, she no longer believed in humanity.
The only one she believed in was herself. Therefore, she vowed to reach the peak of being an absolute master, so that no one could harm her and treat her carelessly.
Eventually, Jeoksawol reached the realm of Hyun-gyeong and became the leader of Hao Mun and Sado Family.
She entrusted her heart to no one. Even her disciple, Baek Myeon-am-gun, was no exception.
To her, men were just ugly embodiments of lust.
“Then why······.”
She didn’t believe it.
“I will not give my heart.”
Men were nothing but embodiments of desire, obsessed with appearances.
That’s what she had thought. But why?
When did it change?
“······I can’t get that bastard’s figure out of my head······.”
Jeoksawol sobbed.
Just the sound of his voice made her heart race and her face flush with heat.
Just imagining being held in his embrace made her body warm, and receiving a gentle touch made her face melt away, breaking into a genuine smile filled with warmth.
Every single day.
Receiving Lee Cheol-soo’s reports prepared by Baek Myeon-am-gun through Hao Mun’s information network, imagining his appearance based on the actions written in the reports, and secretly collecting his reports and looks in a hidden box made her own reflection hate herself.
Every single day, she hated her own ridiculous self, eagerly awaiting their next meeting like a statue.
Not as a demonic faction but as a part of the Orthodox sect, feeling a hidden delight in Lee Cheol-soo’s victory made her hate herself even more.
“That’s not my true self······ I’m the most beautiful in the world······.”
She wanted to see him.
Again, like before, she wished to call him ‘Gaga’ in the guise of Nung So-ja.
As the unparalleled beauty, Jeoksawol shouldn’t but Nung So-ja, the top-tier performer, could call him that and become his beloved.
But when she sought him out again, he had said it was best to keep their distance for the time being.
Though there were good feelings, he said he was hesitant since the rumors had spread after that.
“······The rumors······.”
It had been a rumor she had spread to take him away from Geumhu.
To make it a given fact.
It had been an issue with beggars interfering; it had been going well up to a point.
But because of the rumors, Lee Cheol-soo had no choice but to keep his distance from her.
Furthermore, he had said he liked honest women.
“······Did Gaga know I had spread those rumors······ Is that why······?”
Caught between the Orthodox and demonic factions.
Romantic rumors were indeed fatal. Moreover, as the rumors warped further, a label like ‘Colorful Horse’ was created.
It was a lethal rumor for someone from a martial family’s lineage known for its secular nature, but especially more so for someone from the former Gudaimun Sect’s disposition like her.
She couldn’t help but be concerned about how others viewed her.
“······Was it my fault? Was it······ because I spread those rumors······ that Gaga wouldn’t meet with me······?”
In the end, it was her fault.
Having reached that conclusion, tears again flowed from Jeoksawol’s eyes.
She trembled, sobbing.
If only she had a little more patience, she could have trapped Lee Cheol-soo within her skirts. She wouldn’t even care if he married Geumhu. If she held his heart, then that would be her victory.
But desperation struck.
That young girl, Geumhu, swayed her tail like a vixen, making Jeoksawol act impulsively and mess everything up.
That was why.
Gaga had grown cold, had turned her away harshly, and wouldn’t meet her.
All of it.
Was her fault.
“······Gaga······”
I want to see you.
To do that······.
Lee Cheol-soo had already given her the answer.
He said if she had something to say, to come directly as Nung So-ja and mentioned he liked honest women.
That meant, if she apologized directly······.
“······Gaga might meet me again.”
Apologize.
She had to muster the courage to apologize sincerely for the first time in her life.
To a boy 46 years her younger.
For Jeoksawol, the absolute beauty of the world, the leader of Sado Family, and the top figure of the Orthodox faction, it was an unthinkable act.
“······But if it’s Nung So-ja, it’ll be okay.”
Yet as Nung So-ja, it would be just fine.
For the heart of Nung So-ja, she wouldn’t mind giving everything to him. In the guise of Nung So-ja, it would be okay for her to become his beloved.
Though it was her first meeting as Jeoksawol, she had already met him many times as Nung So-ja.
So it was acceptable.
······Moreover, as Nung So-ja, she would monopolize all of his feelings.
With that resolve, Jeoksawol wiped her tears with her sleeve and stood up.
“I will meet Gaga again.”
Thump thump!
Thinking of him made her heart race wildly again, which she struggled to calm down as Jeoksawol leapt down the hill to Gongdong Mountain.
And two days later.
A guest arrived at the quiet Gongdong Sect.
Yeom Wang Nung So-ja.
And she brought three cartloads of treasures.