The Scientist of Monster Creation, forcefully Hired

53. Chloe’s Shock



-Back before the first Intruder-

Chloe was shocked, very throughly ad that. 
You know, when you know something is bad, but never really take it to your heart? 
Since the Effect is pretty unnoticeable at short Term, you continue a bad habit?

Then, when signs show, it isn’t that bad and so on? 
One can’t expect to change suddenly or it isn’t that bad? 
It can even be such unnoticed things, like bad posture or to much social media until one is shortsighted.

Chloe never lived with actively involving herself with such things. 
But they were in her live, like alcohol or sitting slumped down. 
Tiny things over a long Time, accumulating damage to the Body.

She just wanted to ensure she is fine, after feeling so bad with all the Dungeon Master invading her Home. 
Just a precautionary measure, having stray thought like she hasn’t any doctor to do regularly check up. 
The Spell was adjusted to point of flaws, instead of recreating the Nerve System in her Mind.

She knew it would have been to much for her. 
So she toned it down, giving her a Sensation of Damage that may be. 
After casting the Spell, she got on her knees.

Chloe experienced everything. 
An undeniable Proof of Damage done to it. 
And it scared her.

Before, it was out of sight, out of mind. 
She thought she was mindful of potential Harm to herself, but it was a lie, in a way. 
It was her Greed, pushing herself to have as much as she can get, while convincing herself that it isn’t that bad.

And now, she is afraid of how it harmed her. And greedy in a way, to be perfectly healthy. 
Chloe couldn’t stand it. She felt terrible. 
It was her Body, her responsibility.

It was like seeing one’s best work and only seeing bad things. 
Not even faults, like a weirdly phrased sentence or unsteady line. 
More like not being able to take any Pride in it.

And feeling shame for it. 
Shame for all one was going through, to have made this best work. 

Maybe even shame for having many people involved into the project.

This kind of Shame she feels for herself, and her Parents. 
They nurtured her, gave her this Body in a Way, and she feels like she kicked it with her feet. 
Unknowingly, in one way, knowingly in another.

Like it wasn’t worth the Attention. 
She knows herself, it may be an exaggeration, but this are her honest feeling. 
Her first thought after her emotional outburst was to apologise.

Even if they wouldn’t her it, she should show so much respect. 
But then, she begins to cry. 
No matter how though she thinks of herself, she still valued.

Valued trips to amusement parks, valued how she was congratulated for completing school. 
How people were there for every big success she made. 
And for every bad Moment when she needed someone.

She thinks of herself as though, and someone who gladly works alone. 
And it isn’t wrong. She is bad at communicating with others, and has a hard time stomaching when it isn’t going her way. 
Since she thinks she has it all figured out.

It isn’t necessary wrong, but not a reason for shoving other away. 
But she thoughts she likes to be alone. 
Quiet and Calm, and environment she can work good with.

But in reality, when there was nobody near. 
When she didn’t have the Knowledge that she could walk through some door and meet someone. 
She would feel lonely, even a bit abandoned.

But what about it? She shouldn’t feel like that. 
She wouldn’t be left behind, this thought were immature and improper. 
Just quietly storing it away and wait. She can’t do anything else.

Also while crying. 
Sometimes, she cried because everything felt so unfair. 
Sometimes, when she cried at home, her Mother would come and talk to her.

But at some point, while being a teenager, she didn’t manage to cry anymore. 
She just felt hollow. After school, it was that she either had something to do, or wait until tomorrow. 
At some point, she wanted to cry again, but no tears came out.

She was already this old. Doesn’t she feel ashamed to cry because of such small thing? 
Can’t she behave herself? This isn’t really something to cry about! 
Fine, then just escape into your room, not like anyone will miss you!

At this Moment, Chloe couldn’t care anymore about her nerve System. 
She was lonely. She can’t take it anymore. But she doesn’t want to be back. 
But what would it change, being back?

Is she a someone to someone here? 
No, she is someone with an Ability others want. 
But she isn’t “Chloe” or “a Woman” or something else in their Eyes.

Could she cry to Dalia? But what does she have to do with all that? 
It would be unfair for her to expect that she takes care of her. 
Ciler and Calida are Wolfs. They are good Pets, but I can’t burden them like that.

Then there is Layla, but I can’t trust her. 
She has other intentions as me, and other Dungeon Master are obviously interested in me in a Way that collides with my interest. 
In short, they want me dead. I don’t know if Layla wouldn’t turn again past me if she sees a weakness of me.

Everyone else can be excluded by default. 
Why would she trust anybody else more than the people she previously listed? 
She must steel herself to be lonely.

Not wanting to delve any deeper, she begins to steadily use Organic Magic. 
She wants to distract herself, and does so by slowly healing damage to her Body. 
But since she naturally doesn’t have enough Comprehension about that, she choose something between brute force and letting it roam freely.

She uses a Spell, that makes the Mana keep it shape and feed it her own Body. 
Then, when the Body tries to naturally heal her in a Way, the Mana fuels the process and increase the Limit of what can be healed. 
Then Spell gets repeated pretty often, she not caring about how her Mental focus diminishes.

At some point, she also made a spell to undo “Scars”. 
When her body could heal the Damage completely and left a scar in a way. 
Then, the Body begins to repeat the Healing, but this time with Mana to support it.

It wasn’t perfect. 
In fact, much of the Damage to her Nerve System couldn’t be completely closed. 
But overall everything looks better.

At some point Dalia asked for her help. 
Chloe was in a strange shape were her Mental focus was diminished, but her own mental energy was completely fine. 
Like feeling one should sleep but being completely awake.

But after that, she just begin to sleep. 
She took a fetal position and began to sleep in the Free Landscape. 
At some point, Ciler and Calida joined her.

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