The Most Random System

"October 4th: If I don't seriously lose weight tomorrow, in my next life, I'll become one of Old Jiang's people!"

"October 5th: If I don't seriously lose weight tomorrow, in my next life, I'll become Japanese!"

"October 6th: If I don't stick to my diet tomorrow, I'll be a pig in the next life!"

"October 7th: Oink oink oink oink, oink oink oink!"

"So you've already become Tianpeng, Bao Wei, you're even better than Martin the Transformer, you're the great Bao Wei Transformer." Lin Li laughed, patting Bao Wei's shoulder with a chuckle.

"I've tried really hard, I've been following the weight-loss tutorials. I did seven times their training amount, but it's still useless," Zhou Baowei scratched his head and said.

"Which part of the amount?" Lin Li's sharp eyes instantly saw through the wordplay.

"The diet meals."

"Makes sense, you could eat seven servings a day, you're this!" Lin Li gave a thumbs up.

"Wrong, just one sitting. You know, those diet meals are actually quite tasty."

"You've earned two thumbs up then."

After chatting with a few people in the hallway for a while, Lin Li went back to the classroom.

Bai Bufan was sitting at his desk, the window next to him was open, and the ceiling fan above was spinning with a creaky sound.

Would the ceiling fan cut off his head if it fell?

Since childhood, Lin Li has imagined such scenes and thought about how he would dodge and how far the blood would splatter.

"Your window's open, and there will be a lot of mosquitoes later," Lin Li said as he sat down and closed the window.

Although Lin Li wasn't afraid of mosquitoes, having other little bugs flying around was annoying.

"It's the end of September, and we can't even turn on the air conditioning. Nansang is really stingy," Bai Bufan helplessly pointed to the stand-up air conditioner behind him that couldn't be turned on.

"When your mind is calm, it naturally cools down. If you can't stand this little bit of heat, won't you break down when you're delivering food after graduation?" Lin Li looked at Bai Bufan with some disappointment.

Bai Bufan: "?"

"Why is my future already doomed to be delivering food? Shouldn't I be selling matches in winter?"

"Sure, I respect your choice."

"Wait, that's not right!"

...

After evening self-study started, Xue Jian made his routine rounds and then called Lin Li and Bai Bufan out.

It wasn't anything bad, it was just because they made it onto the school's honor board, and since it was their first time, they needed to provide some words of "what they want to say" for the school records.

"Can we say anything?" Lin Li hoped as he asked.

"You can't mention anything related to gambling, drugs, or porn."

Lin Li: "I want to say that silence is golden."

"And you?" Xue Jian turned to Bai Bufan.

Bai Bufan: "..."

At this moment, silence was more powerful than words.

Xue Jian: "..."

Xue Jian realized his silence and Bai Bufan's silence were different.

"You two need to change yours."

Lin Li and Bai Bufan had no choice.

After all, rules are rules, and they're not newly set today.

Finally, considering they both made it onto the honor board together, they decided to collaborate. Lin Li looked up, "Teacher, can I write, 'Without Bufan, I wouldn't have achieved today's results'?"

"That's fine." At least it's better than gambling, drugs, or porn, Xue Jian nodded.

Bai Bufan's eyes widened, feeling a bit teary, then firmly nodded, "Teacher, then I'll write, 'Without Lin Li, I wouldn't have made such progress'."

"Alright."

Not wanting to spend more time with these two troublemakers, Xue Jian nodded and left.

"Good brothers!"

"For a lifetime!"

The two left behind exchanged glances, their brotherhood causing them to shed tears for each other.

Evening self-study continued, and Lin Li, having finished both homework and pre-study during the holiday, pretended to study but actually began cultivating in the classroom by holding a Spirit Stone.

After all, the transformation process of the Purity and Righteousness Thunder-Controlling Body doesn't show any oddities.

Bai Bufan was catching up on the homework specially reserved for tonight from the National Day.

Writing while muttering:

"Domain, kingdom, class, order, family, genus, species, I see, in biological taxonomy, Kobe is class, Lao Da seems to have mentioned the anus many times, Father is delighted."

Lin Li: "?"

Thanking both Bufan and Kobe, Lin Li started clenching his anus while drinking water for health.

...

"I'm off, contact me through a message in a bottle if you need anything," as the evening self-study bell rang, Lin Li got up and said to Bai Bufan.

"Why so hurried? Where are you off to?" Bai Bufan barely got out of his seat and saw Lin Li was ready to bolt, so he curiously asked.

"I have a date."

"With whom?"

"Miss Beauty," Lin Li said as he walked toward the back door.

"Outside school?" Bai Bufan glanced at Chen Yu Ying who was still at her seat, his voice slightly lower, "Preparing to cheat so soon? Be careful or you'll get caught."

"Beyond the planet."

Bai Bufan: "?"

The truth is always hard to believe. Ignoring Bai Bufan, Lin Li jogged to get downstairs, but suddenly remembered something, changing course toward the office.

"What's up?" Xue Jian was about to get up and return to the teacher's dormitory when he saw Lin Li running over and asked in confusion.

"Teacher, did the honor board 'want to say' text get reported?" Lin Li looked at Xue Jian.

"Not yet, what's up?" Xue Jian shook his head.

Lin Li smiled, "Can I change it?"

Xue Jian: "?"

"...Sure."

Bai Bufan, who cares about your brotherly feelings.

...

Riding back home, Lin Li unpacked all the deliveries he received that afternoon.

Baseball bat, steel rod, fruit knife, and dagger, and a bottle of pepper spray.

"This ability is quite something, I'm looking forward to situations where I'll use it proactively. Will I really become a weapon master?"

Lin Li mused.

In front of him, the paper mannequin he had just crafted was marred with deep cuts in vital areas.

And good enough hits were all made by Lin Li, someone with no prior training.

Lin Li felt like there was a comprehensive weapon master in his mind. Each time he picked up a melee weapon, it would teach him how to use it, as long as he followed its guidance.

With enhanced bodily control, simple actions flowed smoothly and could entirely replicate the thoughts in his mind.

Without working at Da Run Fa slaughtering fish for a few years, it's hard to have such fluidity.

However, some high-difficulty moves, while comprehended by the brain, the body still couldn't perform them yet, needing time to settle.

Moreover, this target in front of him was stationary; real combat would be different, as the body would find it even harder to interpret and handle the brain's instructions.

But it was already quite impressive.

If someone saw Lin Li's actions, they would surely mistake him for someone from Changsha.

The act of stabbing Bai Bufan in the back tonight is probably also induced by this ability.

Just wonder why suddenly there was the urge to backstab, darn "close-combat spirit," causing him trouble.

Lin Li is good, close-combat spirit is bad.

Unfortunately, the dagger and fruit knife in hand had limited techniques, but with a sword or saber, it could look more stylish.

With iron rods and baseball bats, the brain has many tricks.

Unfortunately, even modern basic versions of these things cost several hundred, and most don't have blades.

Blade versions are even more expensive.

They are less cost-effective compared to buying a chainsaw and becoming the bald Qiang.

Lin Li chose not to buy a chainsaw because it was too noisy. He wanted to sneak in silently, avoiding gunfire.

Putting the dagger back in its sheath, Lin Li returned to his room, turned on the air conditioner first, then wore a protective suit under his clothes, before donning the bulletproof vest, wrist guards, and other armor on his body.

Truth be told, the final result was somewhat bulky, even slightly hindering movement, and quite hot, but this way, Lin Li felt safe.

Purity and Righteousness Thunder-Controlling Body was fully charged, with the "Duck Blood Bottle" containing one-third human lust, one-third fear, and one-third empty for emergency use.

Finally, Lin Li took his cell phone, holding a tiny plastic box with a live ant inside, heading to the bathroom.

Placing disinfectant, alcohol, and other cleaning supplies next to him, ready to sanitize immediately upon return.

As he activated the stopwatch function on the backup phone placed on top of the washing machine, Lin Li clicked a button on the interface, still unexposed in the system.

His vision turned pale.

Miss Beauty, I'm coming!