The Life Of Normal-Taro

Even though he opened the door, Thankappan was still hesitant to actually get in. Unlike Lonappan, he didn't have a great relationship with Ponnappan. What they shared was a working relationship where Thankappan took Ponnappan's orders, no matter what or how shitty it was. That was the life of the junior agent.

Although the Ponnappan he saw with Lonappan seemed extremely friendly and approachable, he was still the commanding officer of the MIB: Snehatheeram base. So, Thankappan was extremely worried since he just committed treason now that he thought about it. After all, he just helped an alien pursued by the MIB HQ. He was slightly worried about the consequences.

"Aren't you gonna come in?" Ponnappan asked from the inside. Thankappan hadn't even completely opened the door yet, so he was surprised that Ponnappan knew that it was him.

"Ah, yes sir." Thankappan broke out of his trance and got inside Ponnappan's office.

"Hello there." Ponnappan flashed a smile.

"General Ponnappan." Thankappan gave out a smile as well.

"Huh, I'm the commanding officer though. Clearly you forgot the hierarchical system of the MIB, didn't you?" Ponnappan sounded a bit grumpy.

"Oh, I thought we were referencing iconic movie lines, so… I apologize, Commanding officer Ponnappan." The junior agent was quick to apologize.

"Sheesh, don't go apologizing so quickly now. I was simply joking." Ponnappan shrugged.

"I see. My apology wasn't a joke, sir." Thankappan replied.

"My goodness. Chill for a bit now, will ya?" Ponnappan sighed. Since that didn't seem possible, he shifted his attention from the stiff Thankappan to the person beside him. "Oh, so you are the elusive Crimson Robber, aren't you?" He asked.

"You can call me Scarlet." Scarlet replied.

"Oh, then you can call me Ponnappan as well. Nice to meet you, Scarlet." Ponnappan extended a hand to shake hands, but Scarlet simply stared at the extended hand without making a single noise. This brought forth an awkward atmosphere, so Ponnappan retracted his hand quietly.

That's when Scarlet snapped back into reality. "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to do that. I simply was fascinated by the greetings humans does that I actually forgot to greet back." He shrugged.

"Ah, no worries. I didn't feel awkward at all." Ponnappan gave out a really dry chuckle. "By the way, if you felt weirded out or awkward by the way we greet each other, do tell me. We'll do it your way—although, I really don't know how you greet people though. How is it?" He asked.

"Crimsoner's greeting?" Scarlet asked to which Ponnappan nodded his head. "Oh, we lick tongues as a form of greeting." He replied.

Ponnappan looked baffled. He didn't know how to take in what Scarlet just said. "Okay, let me just process what I heard right now. So, you smack lips when you see someone, right? That's what you mean by licking, right?" He asked, hoping that would be the case. After all, that was the least disgusting of all the actions that he thought of.

"Nah, we lick each other's tongues." Scarlet spoke.

"Okay, so you french each other, right?" Ponnappan asked.

"French?" Scarlet looked confused as he heard that.

"Ah, it's a kiss that involves both tongue and lips." Ponnappan explained.

"Eww, we don't kiss every random stranger we meet on road. That's weird as hell!" Scarlet cried.

"Oh, thank God!" Ponnappan sighed in relief as he heard that, but he still had that one question lingering around in his mind. "Then what did you even mean by licking tongues? Is there any machine or something that's named tongue that you lick or something?" He asked.

"Nah, it just mean what I said. We open our mouths, protrude our tongues out and lick it. It's simple as that." Scarlet replied.

"My goodness. That's even more disgusting that a normal French kiss." Ponnappan thought as he pictured the horrifying scene. "You know what? We can skip the greetings part. It'll be better that way." He chuckled nervously.

"Oh, I see. It looks like you felt a bit uncomfortable by my explanation. Tell me, is that so?" Scarlet asked.

"Well…" Ponnappan had a difficult time telling the truth since he thought that it would offend Scarlet.

However, the other guy didn't give a damn about offending Scarlet. "Uncomfortable? We're straight up disgusted by it. I mean, licking tongues… Eww!" Thankappan showed a gagging expression as he said it.

"Oh, come on! It's not like your handshake thing is not obscene." Scarlet shrugged.

"What do you mean?" Thankappan asked.

"Just head to the Minoko planet when you get to venture in space and give them your handshakes." Scarlet spoke.

"Okay, what does a handshake mean in that planet?" Ponnappan asked.

"Well, they have coitus with their hands." Scarlet replied.

"Eww, that's disgusting as well." Thankappan continued with his gagging expression.

"If that's disgusting, what would that make you, who tried to shake hands of random people?" Scarlet asked.

"Ha… That would make me a disgusting human being too, wouldn't it?" Thankappan sighed.

"Exactly. Clashes of cultures is a thing. So, don't outright call something disgusting, because you'll be called disgusting by someone using the same loophole as well." Scarlet spoke.

"Ah, I apologize. I shouldn't have said that." Thankappan apologized for the second time in a few minutes.

"I wasn't looking for an apology. It's just a friendly reminder." Scarlet replied.

"Yea, dude! You gotta stop with the apologizing shtick. You're apologizing way too often to the point that it sound weird." Ponnappan added in.

"But I just apologized two times though." Thankappan looked confused when he heard the boss say that.

"Two times in a five minute chat is way too much to begin with, don't you think?" Ponnappan asked.

"I guess?" Thankappan replied.

"Then stop doing that." Ponnappan ordered.

"Okay, I'll try my best not to say sorry again." Thankappan answered.

"Cool, then shall we talk about the reason I brought you two here?" Ponnappan asked with a smile on his face.

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The awkward atmosphere that left the room after the brief interaction between the three went back up once Ponnappan started talking about the reason. The two didn't want to talk about it once the commanding officer glanced at both, hoping that they would actively reply once he broke the ice. However, now that it seemed as if that wasn't the case, he decided to helm the conversation himself.

"So, Scarlet. Did you have fun messing with the MIB HQ guys? You destroyed their ship too, didn't you? To think that the HQ wasn't able to get a hold of you—that means, you're pretty sneaky, aren't you?" Ponnappan asked, however no reply came from Scarlet's part. Seeing how unresponsive the Crimsoner was, Ponnappan decided to turn his attention towards Thankappan.

"Thankappan! You'll reply, right? How did it feel, harboring a fugitive in a house of which the rent is fully paid by the MIB, huh? Was it fun playing hide and seek that way? Were the other aliens involved in this as well? Of course they are, aren't they?" The commanding officer had no chill as he said that.

…

Neither of them talked. If the previous scenario was cheerful, this one was straight up nightmare level for the both. It wasn't scary per se appearance-wise. His words were simply menacing.

"Oh, come on! Am I gonna be the only one talking in this entire scene. Although, I like talking way too much, I don't really wanna talk the entire time when you two have an exciting tale to tell. Now, tell me." Ponnappan sat up like he was waiting for them to speak. However, even after that, neither of them spoke and this made him really frustrated.

"I see. So, you're not gonna talk now, are you? You're making me resort to harsh tactics, you know?" He spoke. Even that warning didn't seem to have any impact on the both of them, so he just went with it.

"Okay, if I just hand Scarlet over to the HQ, with all the legalities and stuff definitely against you, you would be imprisoned in a closed chamber for the rest of the eternity." He glanced straight into Scarlet's eyes as he spoke that. It slightly flinched once and that was enough for Ponnappan at that moment. So, he turned his attention back to his subordinate.

"Now, you. For hiding a wanted criminal in a high profile area as one of the MIB residency, you'd have your ass served on a plate. I mean, the HQ will be really angry, won't they? I mean, Scarlet was hidden by one of their own. Such a betrayal… It's highly possible that you'll be fired with your memories wiped out and imprisoned. Or, you'll be straight up taken out. You know our council, right? There's no such thing as human rights in this little group of ours. So, no one's gonna plea against the council or ask them to reduce your sentence. You know that, right? Hmm, whatever will you do now?" Ponnappan asked with a sinister smile on his face.

"We'll speak. We'll speak, alright." Thankappan finally succumbed under pressure, which made the commanding officer even more elated.

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