The Hermit, The Tower, The World (Vol.2 Complete)

8th of Yalech - 2nd Kaldros

Having Cira back is a joy that I cannot express. The way she takes all the changes within me in stride makes me feel like she truly accepts me for who I am. As all her things are dropped off by Malakh and the other staffers, I take the opportunity to thank them before they leave.

"I really appreciate you guys volunteering to help." I say to Malakh as he sets a bag on Cira's chair. "She probably won't say it, but Vesa thanks you guys the most for relieving her of the task."

"Of course, Serea! We are happy to help and meet your roommate." Malakh's eyes shift to something behind me and he lowers his voice. "Is he gonna be okay with her alone? She doesn't seem to enjoy being around Calas at all."

I glance behind me to the door in time to see Calas follow Cira out of our room. I inhale sharply, going rigid as panic hits me, making me momentarily light headed. All I can think about is that I haven't had a chance to tell her anything yet, and the fear of what she might find out grips me.

Taking a step toward the door, I am caught at the wrist casually by Fara who has been idly chatting with the other girls. She gives me a knowing look with a subtle shake of her feline head, her tail twitching once to accentuate the motion. Fara can't be serious! Leaving the two of them alone will result in an explosion hotter than the Sunflame Dawn!

My eyes widen in urgent protest, continuing our silent argument while Vesa carries on happily with the girls. Fara's cat eyes narrow and she pulls me in with the rest of the girls by her grip on me. It is clear that she is having none of my silent pleas. I feel her eyes on me until I join in on the conversation.

"What do you think, Serea?" Fara interjects, staring at me slyly as her ears twitch. "What colors do you prefer?"

"Oh, yeah," Lytha chimes in, "Duh, we should just ask the source about what she prefers. Tell me it's not that floral monstrosity you're wearing right now!"

"Uh, I never thought about it much, to be honest." I start, resisting the urge to look at the door. Instead, I fidget with the thread on my little finger. "I guess I wear a lot of cream colors, blacks and grays. They are the easiest to dye."

"Dye?" Munsa asks in an oddly judgmental tone.

"Yeah," I nod, paying no attention to her obvious disapproval, "I used to live in the country before coming to Court and most of my clothes were hand made."

"Wow," Wen's statement mirrors all the expressions I receive for my comment. "No wonder you're so good at craftin' relics. Didja make all those sweaters you used to wear?"

"Yeah, me and my mother both. Some of them are hand-me-downs so I can still fit in them."

"Oh, I'll bet they look better on you now." Vesa smirks in that devilish way of hers. "You used to drown in some of those bulky sweaters, but honey, you have those slender curves now. It's gonna make the clothing stick to all the right places."

Only a strangled sound comes out of my mouth, jaw dropped at her lewd comment. I feel my neck heat as it dawns on me that this is what she meant last week about not always being "this sexy". Chou trills softly in my ear and I close my mouth with a pained look for Vesa.

My attention is drawn to the door suddenly as the red of the thread turns a more vibrant shade. My eyes find Calas there, the wisp of a smile on his face and giving me a wave. He doesn't stop though, so I reach out through the thread, unthinking.

"Trouble?" My unease went with the thought, finding myself unable to hold it back.

"No. Enjoy." His dusky voice echoes in my mind and fills me with relief and a wave of calm forces a breath from my lungs. Maybe they didn't fight, then? It would be a blessing to not have them at each other's throats, especially since I'll be taking another combat course next term. With him.

It's so strange to think that I look forward to those practices now and worry about mentioning them to Cira. That strikes me as an odd thought. I've never thought about hiding anything from Cira. Not my mishaps, or my strange encounters with ancient beasts, or even the ever-present mark on my neck. Surely, Cira wouldn't be mad about me taking more combat classes, except for the fact that I have been training with Calas. Who is also in every first-year combat class.

The realization hits me like lightning. It's not just training that I look forward to. I look forward to training with him. Nearly every day for the past week and all through break, Calas Duskwood has become a normal part of my life, somehow, and I don't want that to change. If I tell Cira, would she make me choose between them?

I glance at Cira who has joined us now and her serene countenance has an undercurrent of something I can't quite place. I hope that we can find a moment to ourselves so I can catch her up on everything that has happened over the break. At this moment I desperately want to clear the air with her.

"Sorry, what did I miss?" Cira asks casually.

"Oh, nothing much," Fara answers in a leisurely tone, inspecting her sharp claw-like nails. "Vesa was just explaining to Serea that her new wardrobe should show off some of that new figure of hers."

"Hmm," I feel Cira's gaze on every inch of me as she weighs the comment against my skin. "Yeah, Serea's all grown up now, isn't she. Before you know it, she'll be talking to boys and dating." She gives me a subtle wink at the end.

I nearly choke on my own spit, giving a cough as my face turns as red as the weakening vibrancy of the thread. Laughter erupts from the rest of the girls, all except Cira and I, who lock eyes and I feel the weight of her gaze once more. It feels like a threat that I can't outrun.

Cira wears a smug look, a knowing look, that grips me firmly. She is met with my expression of horror, my mind racing with only questions of what her and Calas spoke of. By her demeanor, she doesn't seem angry or upset or even in the least bit phased by their earlier discussion, but is acting like she has unlocked a secret, some revelation, that I do not yet know. It terrifies me.

No one else seems any the wiser as the group of us heads out of the Sanctum toward our ultimate destination of Perlshaw. But my mind is reeling as we walk and I find myself twirling the pale thread as we get farther away from Court. My mind drifts into melancholy, thinking of the promise we made to one another that brought this simple piece of string into existence.

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It was bound to happen this way, wasn't it? I think as I analyze every moment over the past two months that our paths have crossed. We have always been drawn to one another: the Void, the Halls of Equity, combat basics, the race. I can't help but wonder though, is it just the promise and this thread that he stays for? My heart whispers through the doubt, hoping against all reason that maybe he would still give me those wry smirks and low, throaty chuckles if the thread didn't bind us anymore.

I give a sigh as we walk and Fara nudges my elbow, a lazy, easy smile on her face.

"You seem bummed for a girls day treat." It's not a whisper, but her volume is hushed so as not to attract attention from the others as they chat loudly about the clothes best suited for my new frame. I give Fara a flat expression, indicating the conversation with my eyes.

"Can you really blame me?"

"They mean well, Serea." Fara says in an endearing tone. "Believe it or not, we all want the best for you and to help in any way we can. What are friends for, right?"

I temper my face to neutrality and hum a noncommittal note.

"Trouble is, everyone has a different ideal about how and with what to help you with."

"How will I know whose help to take?" I ask after a moment's thought.

"Only you can determine that for yourself. But you've already been learning it, haven't you? You took Malakh's help with Cira's things, and made Vesa very happy. So what made you take his offer?"

"It helped the most people achieve what they wanted." I say simply.

"And what do you want?" Fara's question takes me off guard and I am stunned as I find no readily available answer to her question.

"Think about it." Fara adds as we arrive at our first of many destinations, Miss Patty's Tailor and Dress Shoppe.

I do think about it for the rest of the fun afternoon spent among friends in every apparel store and boutique in Perlshaw. But all my thoughts come back to the thread that I twirl in my fingers, its ephemeral shape drifting through them like smoke. It's only mana, but it has become so much more to me than that. A link to a golden eyed beast of a man with his dark hair, sarcastic jibes, and gentle touches that I have become so accustomed to.

I look at myself in the mirror in the changing room of the Spellbound Boutique and purse my lips at my reflection. My face is still heart-shaped but thinner, my hair still long and wavy like beach sands past my shoulders, and my eyes are still a deep sapphire color.

The rest of me has changed to long and slender, and where once I was thin and straight, the tan striped shirt I'm trying on shows the depth of my new curves. No where near as voluminous as Vesa's, thankfully, but it is definitely a feature I'm still getting used to. I change back into the floral-print top as I ponder Fara's question. She probably meant for me to think about the clothes I wanted, not…

I find myself staring at an empty wall of the boutique, but I know what—who lies in that direction. He's been pulling at me like this ever since we met, hasn't he. Not on purpose, not that I would have noticed, but I feel it all the same. It's like the feeling I had with Uriell, but more subtle.

For a moment I recall the thought of Calas that repulsed me back then, sitting on top of the gazebo. I sit in the only seat in the changing room, uneasy from the slow dawning that the idea of kissing Calas doesn't seem so disgusting anymore. I feel the heat of my cheeks as I bury my face in my palms.

"Serea, there is no reason to be embarrassed here," Chou wisps at my ear. "There isn't anyone in here and that top fits you better than seventy percent of the other garments you have tried on so far."

I put my hands down to smile at Chou and give a chuckle at myself.

"You're right, Chou. There's no reason for me to be embarrassed about something that fits." I know what I want, now I just have to convince Cira.

***

We all part ways outside the Great Hall and make our way to our separate commons. Cira and I wave to Munsa at our door as she makes her way to her own. Once back in our room, I start going through all my new things, putting them away and expect Cira to do the same as she had been making purchases all afternoon as well. She stops me in the middle of our room.

I am caught off guard when she holds up her own bags in my direction. I look from her to the bags and back again, a dangerous, frustrated scowl twitches the side of her lip and I instinctively steel myself for what she will say.

"These are for you, too," when she speaks, her voice is tight with restraint.

I am silent for several moments, my jaw going slack and I cover it with a hand.

"Thank you," I start timidly as I take the bags, "but you didn't have to do this, I had a bit of extra funds like I told you."

"Yes, so you told me." She states flatly, "but you didn't tell me how you acquired those funds." Her tone is still tight, like a bow string pulled taught, waiting to be released at the slightest pressure.

I start to realize the trap she has laid for me and I take a deep breath. This is what I have been waiting all day for, isn't it?

"I won it from betting on a broom race. With Calas." I explain in a no nonsense tone that I feel she will appreciate.

"Is that all?" Her body is very still, a spider waiting for a fly.

"No. We spent a lot of the break together, actually." I lead her to my bed for us to sit.

Then I talk. I tell her about all of it. Vesa's party, becoming a staffer, even our study sessions; though I don't tell her where we had them, the broom race, the red aetheric thread, and the morning sessions with the combat junkies. I heave a breath when its all done, feeling so much better to have said it, but Cira is quiet for long moments before folding her arms in front of her, brows furrowed. I brace myself for her response.

"So," she starts uneasily, "are you two like a couple, now?"

My heart skips a beat at the thought. All I can think of is that it is exactly what Kaori had said. I shake my head both in answer to her question and to try to banish the thought of him lounging on my lumpy couch.

"No! No, nothing like that, but we are friends, I would say." I correct her quickly, but maybe too quickly as she heaves a sigh, which seems to deflate all the angry tension in her.

"That is what I was afraid you were going to say." She remarks, head lulling with the rest of her. Cira inhales deeply, her body straightening with the effort. Her hands clasp onto my shoulders and she looks me straight in the eyes, determination shining in hers.

"Serea, this may come as a shock, but I am going to say this anyway, because you need to hear this."

I brace myself for anything and nod my head, ready for her words.

"That boy likes you. Like a ton."

I blink, staring at her dumbfounded. "How do you—"

"How do I know? He told me in not so many words." She purses her lips together as she takes my hands in hers. "He wanted to help you with your new clothes. So he gave me some funds." She scoffs with a shake of her head.

"I tried to tell him no, but he said the money was yours to begin with and that you only gave him part of it because you are kind." She wrestles with a thought in her head, I can see it in her mannerisms; fidgeting with her amulet hanging from her neck for a moment.

I silently urge her on with a squeeze of our conjoined hands.

"Tell me honestly, do you really like this guy?" Her voice is thick with a nasal whine. I can tell she is trying really hard to be supportive, but the disgust in her voice is a bit too plain.

I pay no attention to the furnace that my face must be and try to concentrate on answering the question.

"I think so." I pause while a sheepish expression grows on my face. "I like him enough to take another combat class this term." Suddenly, Cira gives me a big hug and I welcome the comfort.

"I can't promise you I will ever like him, but I will support you." She pulls away quickly to give me a stern look, "This doesn't mean we won't fight, though."

"I don't expect you to change overnight!" I can't help but laugh, the tension in the room breaking with the sound.

"Are you sure you don't want to maybe hold out and find your Uriell from the Masquerade?" She pats my shoulder gently, a pleading expression on her face.

"I tried to look for him, but it just led me on a wild god hunt."

Her face falls, but she recovers quickly enough. "I suppose it was worth a try."

"I'm sorry, Cira. I didn't know how to tell you any of this in a letter. I wanted to talk to you in person." I clasp my hands in my lap, hoping that she understands that I never meant to keep it from her.

"That's fair. It seems like a lot happened while I was gone." She narrows her eyes, her voice going deeper, "But the gods won't be able to help him if he hurts you!"

I stifle a chuckle and respond with, "Calas always tells me I shouldn't resort to violence."

I am then struck firmly with my own pillow and I giggle in response.

It's good to have Cira back.