Chapter 21
Dungeon Status:
Tier 1
Level 1/10
Heart 1600/1600
Experience 0/400
Workers 4/12
Monsters 0/12-2
Traps 11/15+2
Rooms 17
Food 29
Timber 33
Iron 581
Mana 11
Rock 607
Gold 1403
Leather 102
Leather Sludge 49
Lava 38
Explosive Runes 3
Quest: Reach Tier 1
Quest: Kill an adventuring party
Travis woke up with a startled cry. He felt tiny and restricted. The first bit was on account of waking from the weird dream and the second was because he was tied up in his bed covers. "What the hell?"
It felt weird to be breathing. Weird to be able to move arms and legs. Everything about being human felt weird now. Panting for breath, he worked to disentangle himself and get off the bed. His bed. In his room.
The important thing, though, was being back in his home. His house. Not a dungeon. Standing up straight, Travis took a deep breath and took a step—only to not be able to move. Looking down, he saw that his feet had turned into heavy stone bricks.
"This is a dream, isn't it? Weird." The dream wanted Travis to feel afraid as his legs started turning to pink crystal, but he struggled against it. "But is this a dream that me as a dungeon is having or was all that and this a dream human me is going through?"
As the change spread up his body, he let out a string of curses. "Just get it over with so I can wake up for real!"
She felt ridiculous.
"I feel ridiculous. How do you not constantly flash people while wearing this?" Penelope had the big cloak wrapped around herself and the hood up, but with no fasteners on the front it kept blowing open.
Robert just laughed, especially since in the dungeon most of them barely wore anything at all. Right now he was wearing his old shirt with the bottom of it torn, folded upward, and tied around his midsection. "Whoever is on the bottom usually holds it closed. We have a system."
"I have no clue how people haven't noticed this yet. Either we've been lucky, they've been blind, or they—" She stopped as something sunk in. "Or they know and just want our gold."
"There's a way to test that," Robert said. Reaching out to the big bag of gold coins he'd made, he took one and used the scales of his hand to polish all the markings off it. "Try spending this somewhere. If they complain, just tell them it's really worn. If they don't so much as blink, well, they know what's going on."
"I just wish I didn't look so much like an idiot doing it. I guess I could buy some clothes while I'm there. We have plenty of gold, and normal clothes aren't expensive." Picking up the sack and one of her makeshift spears, Penelope tucked the blank coin into her palm and set out. "I'll be back soon, I hope. If things get crazy, I'll dump the gold and run."
"That's what we always said we'd do. Then we could ride Gray—that's the donkey—to freedom!" Robert saluted Penelope lazily and then caved the tunnel exit in so the sludge traps were once again the only way to Travis' heart.
The walk from the dungeon to Northridge was uneventful, though Penelope made mental notes about how obvious it was some woodsmen were working in the forest. She sighed, however, because there wasn't a lot they could do about hiding the fact they were working the forest.
When the town was in sight, Penelope felt an itch. Her spear was sharp and her hands quick, she knew she could surprise more than a few of the townsfolk before they caught her. Her blood started pounding hotter, and her fist tightened around the haft of her weapon.
"No. This is something else doing this to me. It's stupid." But, even checking her sudden bloodlust didn't stop her excitement. "Stupid dungeon. I don't want to hurt them. They're giving us resources for a little gold."
Taking a good, deep breath and letting it out slowly, Penelope put one talon in front of the other and walked right into the town. "First thing, I need to test this." Transferring the sack of gold from one hand to the other (holding it with her spear-hand), she flipped the coin to make sure it was as clear of markings as when Robert had worn it down with his hand.
She froze as she walked into the city center, looking around at the merchants selling everything from tools to street food to raw materials. There was always, however, one place where someone could go to get a meal and a drink. Locking her eyes on the tavern—obvious with its sign hanging out front—Penelope shrugged her shoulders and made her way over to it.
When the doors opened, Catherine Clearwater had been expecting an adventurer. She was well in the know regarding all the goings-on in Northridge, so when she spotted a kobold in the doorway she didn't immediately scream for the guard—though the spear in their hand looked a bit more serious than what she'd heard they normally brought. "H-Hello there. Welcome to the Flaccid Falchion. Can I help you with anything?"
Kill her, take her money. The thoughts were getting annoying, but with repetition they were getting easier to completely ignore. "Ale and something to eat would be nice. Someone to talk to, maybe."
"The first is easy." Catherine started pouring the ale from the magically chilled tap, filling a glass up with the foamy drink. When she set it down on the bar, and spotted the gold coin sitting there, she reached out and took the coin without a word. She knew the rules—you take the coins, ignore whatever was on them, and paid out based on half the gold's value. Town takes a quarter of the sale, merchant gets the other quarter.
Lifting the mug of ale, Penelope realized she hadn't drunk a single sip of anything since becoming a kobold. Working her lips, she finally managed to tip some in the side of her mouth. The taste was almost holy, given her parched body. She realized, after taking another long drought, that this could be a dangerous combination.
Struggling not to laugh, Catherine had to ask, "Good?"
"You have no idea. It's been weeks since I've had a good brew." Penelope couldn't stop herself taking another swig. "Our d—village is mostly all young, uh, lizards. None of them can appreciate a good drink, and it's something I want to fix. Any tips for someone starting out brewing?"
"See Lotti in the market. She'll sell you everything you need. She won't be there right now, she spends most of the day brewing. Tell her Cat sent you." Grabbing up a clean bowl, Catherine turned to the fire at the end of the bar where a big pot of stew was staying warm.
When the barmaid turned back to her with a spoon, some bread, and a bowl of stew, Penelope's mouth started watering for a different reason. "That smells great."
"You have been out in the boonies if you think garrison stew smells good. As I was going to say, that's the second thing on your list, but if you want the last item as more than just friendly banter, I can go get Brolly?"
The way Catherine had said it, to Penelope's ear, meant that anyone in or around the town should know who Brolly was. She shrugged and nodded, figuring she'd just have to talk her way out of a situation if it came up. "Sure."
With the barmaid leaving the taproom, Penelope got stuck into her meal. Between the food and the ale, she could almost imagine being her old human self again. Every now and again a glance at her talons would divest her of that notion, to say nothing of the acrobatics she did trying to drink.
Just a moment after she'd finished, Penelope heard the door of the tavern open. Turning to look, she spotted the barmaid walking in behind a tall, handsome man wearing armor. He had a longsword at his side. Panic grew and Penelope found her hand reaching closer to the spear leaning beside the bar at her side.
"I heard you wanted a chat?" Brolly asked as he walked over to a table. "Come and have a seat and we can discuss any topic you care to." He recognized Penelope by the description Brayden and his party had given of her. With her height, it was far harder to place her as different from a very thin lizardkin, but if he had to pin her down he'd say an oversize kobold.
"Yeah, uh, can I get another mug of ale?" Standing, Penelope clutched the spear in her hand and grabbed the small sack of gold coins. She made her way over to the table Brolly sat at—then nearly jumped when the barmaid set a mug of ale before each of them.
His mind racing with questions, Brolly struggled not to just come out and ask her about the dungeon. "So, I hear you and those other lizardkin have a village nearby?"
"Y-Yeah! A village. We, uh… We found some gold in a river up there. Figured we would mint it to our nation's mark." It was one of the stupider excuses for why her coins all looked like a toddler (a competent toddler) had cast them.
Brolly, first and foremost, didn't want to spook the kobold. She was smart, for a dungeon mob, but there was a definite tension that they both knew what was going on but wouldn't say. Either the pressure would grow too big, or one of them would finally tip their hand. "I'm sorry about that adventuring party. They were ordered not to harm any of you, but that one got too carried away. You won't see him again."
Penelope's instincts rushed in and she wanted to fight her way out of the tavern. She'd use her spear to leg-sweep the guard, screech at the barmaid, and then—Her mind froze as two humans and a half-elf walked into the tavern, all three recognizable as the party that had chased her—minus the human who'd tried to catch her. "I need to—"
"Relax. You're safe here and your gold is welcome." Almost face-palming at the timing of his friend, Brolly reached a mailed hand across the table and touched the back of Penelope's talon. "They're friends. You don't have to run aw—"
"Holy shit, that's the dungeon lizard we saw chopping wood!" Fife marched across to where Brolly and Penelope were sitting. "Hey, no hard feelings about Porter, okay? Guy was an ass about trying to catch you. I'm Fife, this is Brayden and Jack." She thrust her hand out toward Penelope, who stared at it.
"Fife…" Old human reactions came naturally. When a hand was thrust out to Penelope, she clasped it and shook. For a moment she contemplated running, but they were all ignoring the bag of gold and were focused on her. Sitting her weight back on the chair, she felt a pang of defeat. "You know about the dungeon?"
"Yeah! Even poked our head in. You guys are really good about measuring your lines. A lot of dungeons are all twisty and a mess. Hey, what are you in town for today?" It was just about the most interesting time of Fife's life. Talking to a dungeon monster—that she normally beat the stuffing out of—was different.
"C-Copper. Yeast." She couldn't believe she was having this normal(ish) conversation with an adventurer.
"You want to brew alcohol?" The idea fascinated Brolly. "You could just buy some to tide you over. Hey"—he raised his voice—"Cat! Get a small keg of whiskey ready to travel!" Turning back to Penelope, Brolly felt a new excitement rush through him. "Look, we just need to know if you need some help out there? Trading seems like a good idea, assuming you don't want to get angry and send out waves of monsters to attack us. We figured out two other nearby dungeons, but there might be more. Have you seen any others?"
Penelope just shook her head. "We—We have things under control. There were some direwolves, but—"
"Oh! Those! You should have seen it. There was like twenty of them just out in the forest near your place. Jack here shot an ice-thingy into one and it exploded, then hit a bunch of the others and they exploded." Fife reached out and grabbed Jack and pulled him closer. "He's a great sorcerer, you should see some of the stuff this guy can do!"
"Fife," Brayden said, "back off and let them breathe. Go to the bar and get something to drink." When Fife looked at him like a kicked puppy, he almost yielded to her desire to talk at Penelope. When she moved, grumbling, he got a clear view of Penelope and smiled. "There. She's a bit overwhelming—whether you're talking to her, trying to stop her punching you, or moving through a—" He stopped to not mention how good Fife was with sword in hand.
Warrior priests were not all that common, but Penelope knew they shared at least one power with paladins—the ability to sniff out evil. When he did nothing but sit there, she figured he wasn't detecting anything evil in her. "Dungeon creatures aren't evil?"
"Nope! Well, most of the ones I've bothered to check registered evil, but you don't—and those other two don't. I figure that's good enough for me and Brogdar."
"So, how can we do more business?" Brolly asked.