The Gloomy and Timid Princess Heads to the Academy

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I look up at the sky.

The brilliant sun and vast sky are nowhere to be seen.

Only a massive boulder, too huge to even measure, floats in defiance of providence.

…No, that’s not right. That sight itself is providence. Just as it seems unyieldingly solid, it can easily tip over at the mere command of a god.

Since the moment I rebelled against becoming a plaything of the gods, I had been prepared for death. But I never expected them to come out this bold.

There were no regrets. Just a sense of loss. The realization that this would be the end of my ability to think and act for myself, and to laugh and chatter freely with my comrades, weighed heavily on my heart.

Comrades. Those who, even for a fleeting moment, vowed to refuse the divine command and live with their own thoughts—how were they feeling now?

Were they in despair? Or were they blaming me? I could certainly imagine some feeling that way. I had come to accept that as a matter of course.

However, as I focused my senses, I found none among them fearful or losing their will to fight. No one was sitting in despair or giving up.

Instead, they gripped their weapons tightly, maintaining their stances, their eyes fiery as they stared down the woman before them.

Indeed, they were too good for me. They were too good for someone who defied the heavens for the sake of sacrificing a daughter.

…But this is it. The love for family, the anticipation for a different tomorrow, the dreams for a future carved by my own hands—everything ends here.

In front of me stood a woman who seemed to have torn a piece from the night sky. Did that expression hold contempt for us, or was it one of curiosity?

She looked like us, yet different. Her presence seemed too insignificant and pitiful to be described as divine.

She was not grand enough to wrap around a mountain. She bore no halo like the sun. There was no crown of light or even ornate decorations.

In fact, she lacked ears to hear from afar or a tail for balance.

Yet that very appearance revealed who she was.

By mere numbers, we had the overwhelming advantage. But no one was willing to step forward. Everyone knew that taking even a step could end with them torn to shreds.

—Foolish humans. My small, frail children who strive to live on their own. Hear me. And bow your heads. This is my final act of mercy.

“…Onbyeolbi.”

Though my lips didn’t move, her name was engrained in my mind. It seemed everyone present was hearing her voice.

—Repent now if you still seek forgiveness. If you wish to live, open your mouth and confess your sins. I am listening.

I looked around. No one had lowered their weapons. I couldn’t hear a single voice kneeling in confession, begging for mercy.

“…That won’t happen.”

I spoke on behalf of everyone present. I didn’t say it in disgust or resentment for their lack of repentance.

It was merely an expression of, “We expected this.”

“We will not become your slaves again. Even if it kills us, we will die as humans. Even if you are the creator of all, we will not bow our wills.”

At that moment, we all shared the same thought. I could tell. No matter what happened, we would not mindlessly be herded back into servitude.

—Is that truly your will? Despite being a fleeting moment, do you wish to live on your own?

“Yes.”

—Can you honestly say that, even if the result is a life filled with pain and sorrow?

“Yes.”

—Then prepare to die.

As she gestured, the heavens began to shake. The sprawling boulder that had been still was now falling.

A brave man charged at her, but he vanished without a trace, leaving only a shout. Soon, she concealed her divine form.

It wouldn’t even leave a scratch if it hit. Did she avoid it solely to keep her clothes free of dust? The thought that her mind was occupied with that as death approached seemed ridiculous.

At the very least, I wouldn’t turn my eyes away from death.

—

I woke up to the sound of birds chirping outside.

Well, I opened my eyes, but that didn’t mean I had gotten out of bed. I couldn’t sleep because of that strange sound and the odd feeling in my stomach.

Rubbing my eyes, my mind began to clear. I felt much more awake than yesterday.

After all, a heat cycle only lasts about a day.

What was that? A heat cycle isn’t really anything special. It wasn’t like I was just staring at some guy’s groin like in the dirty cartoons.

…Well, I did touch a little. But that was my mistake; he apologized, so I didn’t hold it against him.

I was embarrassed, but it was something a guy couldn’t help. Having been a guy once, I understood.

Holding hands…

Oh.

Thinking back, we were holding hands the entire day yesterday.

After saying I didn’t want anyone to catch us, I even drew a line in our conversation, yet I ended up holding hands regardless of who was around?

Seriously, how dumb was I?

“Ugh…”

If only I had thought for a second, I wouldn’t have acted like that. How foolish was yesterday’s version of me? I wanted to bury my head in the bed in shame.

However, it wasn’t all bad.

I had become much closer to Dokan. Not merely friends, but friends sharing secrets.

The mere fact that we had things hidden from our parents created a sense of tension in my heart.

Even so… for some reason, I didn’t dislike it. I didn’t want to say this life was boring, but I felt there was nothing wrong with feeling this guilty pleasure.

And it felt significant that I had formed such a deep connection with someone, something I hadn’t experienced through both my past and present lives.

I used to play games and sometimes even sleep with that complicated guy, but in hindsight, it felt a bit ambiguous to call it a close relationship.

Looking back, I hadn’t realized it then, but we were using each other.

At least, I had never once felt that he cared for me like Dokan did.

Not sure why he called my name last night from his room, but isn’t that a sign he thinks of me in a special way?

Maybe he just missed his friend and called out my name.

Thinking that way made me feel warm inside. No one had ever missed me as a person in my past life.

I’m sure no one knew I had disappeared. I had been working remotely for months before I vanished, and my parents passed away while I was in college.

Even counting the days I saw them in a year, it wasn’t even a week, so it hadn’t been that sorrowful.

It had been a long time since I had contact with that friend I used to call “friend.” Perhaps the only ones looking for me now were the landlord and tax office employees.

Well, let’s stop with the gloomy thoughts here. Right now, I have a friend who is eagerly searching for me.

Wishing not to repeat yesterday’s mistake, I took a shower with my ears closed today. Though Dokan didn’t mind, I remembered he complained about the smell of the shampoo, so I also made sure to control how much I used.

There’s that tidbit of unpleasant information that women take forever to dry their hair. Although I was pretty sure it was dry, it felt like the water kept coming from somewhere.

Just as I was about to head outside while wearing the clothes I had carelessly tossed on the chair, I spotted my journal.

Since I had written in it last night, my mother had probably seen it by now.

At least, I hadn’t lied to her before, but since yesterday was my first time lying, I felt unnerved.

– I’m relieved to hear it seems everything is fine. It seems there was no major incident with that boy Dokan. I hope your father doesn’t cause any trouble.

My heart raced as though a triangle was spinning violently in my chest.

– And gradually, begin to look for an answer to the question I posed to you.

Ah, that’s right. That was the condition.

Can a human live without a god?

So, how should I answer that? My mother sometimes threw out philosophical questions like that.

When I was little, I would play innocent and convey a vibe of “I don’t understand such things,” escaping somehow, but I couldn’t do that this time.

My mother had readily allowed me to go to the Academy. But she also asked me to return with an answer to her question. That was her condition for sending me to the Academy.

She said any answer would suffice, which only piled on the pressure. After going through so many things in a short time, I had forgotten about it for a bit.

I really need to carefully consider this.

That means today isn’t the day to ponder. I had a four-year grace period, so starting today, there was no need to worry about humans and gods.

And above all, humans just have to obey the gods. If you do that, you can live a peaceful life.

Looking at the clock, I noticed I had plenty of time. I could hear commotion coming from the next room, so it seemed they’d be out soon.

Since I had just heard the sound of someone showering a moment ago, I decided to wait by the door. If they missed me enough to call my name, it was only proper for me to respond in kind.

Although, since the kids had been moving around for a while, it was a pity I couldn’t speak to them like a friend. Not too long after, Dokan came out of the door.

Since we were friends, it seemed okay to tease him a bit.

“I heard everything. You called my name last night.”

“…Huh?”

What was he saying? His face said it all. He looked so clueless. He wouldn’t just brush it off, pretending he didn’t know, would he? I thought it was amusing how he took a step back as I approached him slowly.

Seeing that his head was almost a size bigger than mine was oddly funny.

“…That was… uh…”

“Weeell… how much did you miss me?”

“…………Yes. I tend to get a little lonely…”

What kind of loneliness does a guy have? My inner critic felt that way. Moreover, I probably won’t even have a day where I’d still be alone later on.

…Even if he was deceiving me, friends are friends.

Since I nearly shoved Dokan towards the entrance, I could smell the scents of his room wafting through.

Being a guy, there was the smell of something musty, along with some strange fragrance.

It was a bit familiar…

“Hmm…?”

The heat cycle should be over, so why was my stomach still a bit uneasy?

“Is there a problem?”

“Oh, no. Let’s go.”

I figured it was just that I wasn’t feeling well. I dismissed the thought and headed to the classroom with Dokan.