The Dungeon's Worst Little Mistake

It has been a long while since Gary has gotten to do his job, and to put it simply, he is bored…

Though, it should be mentioned that his name isn't actually Gary. That is just what some people call him, or more accurately, himself and all the past iterations of Gary who used to occupy this room until they were inevitably slain by adventurers.

But that is important to Gary. No, he doesn't care about having a name, for he lacks the required levels of personness to even think of himself as an individual that needs to be differentiated from others through the use of a name.

Gary is just Gary. Boss monster of the Twentieth floor of Dungeon 117, a Deinosuchus. Or, to put it simply, a really freaking big crocodile. Why it is that people call him a gator when he's actually a crocodile, Gary will never know. Gary ain't no little gator! Does he look like some cute little caiman? No. He is a big ass crocodile!

Gary blows some bubble out his nose.

And… he is bored…

It has been a while since the last group of humans had tried getting though here. That had been fun. Gary got to eat them all. The last one he ate had been the most entertaining, screaming and splashing around in the water as they tried to desperately swim away as fast as they could. Obviously, no human can outswim a crocodile, let alone one larger than a horse drawn carriage. But Gary had enjoyed chasing and stalking the human for a good distance, even letting them think they had gotten away for a short while.

The screams when he had burst out of the water and lifted them up his massive jaw, only to silence them with one big CRUNCH had only made them all the more tastier. Gary had really enjoyed that. Gary likes his job very much.

And it should be noted that, while lacking the intelligence and awareness necessary to consider himself a person, Gary is still intelligent. He is aware of his position in the Dungeon. His role as a gate keeper and protector. He knows that it is his responsibility to keep invaders from getting past his post at all costs, even at the threat of losing his own life. And this job is something that he does with pride.

He just wishes that more people would come his way…

All he can do is just sit in his den in a little hidden side passage and blow bubbles out his nose as he waits. Splayed out under the water and resting on the sandy floor, he watches as fish go swimming by and go about their little lives. He is a little hungry… he could go and bully the other monsters in the Boss Room and then eat a few. It's not like the Dungeon would mind. It'd just make more to replace them.

Gary considers it for a little while and then decides not to. He's too bored to bother and not hungry enough to get up yet. Guess he'll just go back to sleep. Not like there is anything else to do around here.

…

…

//Notice: Three Invaders have entered your domain.

//Orders: Eliminate the Invaders.

…

//Orders: Eliminate the Invaders.

…

//Orders: Wake the hell up and do your job!

Hmm? Gary cracks his eyes open and sees the text floating in front of his vision. He can't read, but he does understand the meaning behind the messages as the System translates it all into his mind.

Shit, did he sleep in!? There are humans to eat; what if they had already gotten past him?!

Gary quickly springs into motion, startling all the fish that had been picking algae off his scales into scattering, and dashes down the tunnel into the Boss Room proper, which is just a long waterway that flows downhill. Gary hadn't been in this area in a couple of days because the Dungeon had been doing stuff in here and it was rather loud. And with his large body, he would have just gotten in the way.

But now that he is in here again, he can't help but to notice that the place looks different...

//Orders: Eliminate the Invaders.

Right, right. Gary needs to do his job. Finally, something to do!

He gives himself a quick shake to get the rest of the sleep out of his system and finish waking up. Now then, which way are the humans? Did they already pass him, or are they on their way still?

BoomBoomBOOM! Badabada! BoomBoomBOOM!

Hmm? What that?

Gary looks to the right, feeling as vibration are already running though the water. Focusing, he can hear as some fighting is already happening, the mobs is his room trying to slow them down. Good, they haven't gotten past him yet. Looks like he didn't sleep in late after all!

BoomBoomBOOM! Badabada! BoomBoomBOOM!

It's getting louder… Is one of the humans playing with that noise maker thing again? Are they stupid? They should know that that will just draw more attention. Oh well, if they want to get eaten that badly, then Gary will be more than happy to oblige.

He starts swimming their way at a lazy pace. No reason to waste energy yet, especially if they are coming to him. It's just… that noise is starting to get louder and louder real fast…

This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

BoomBoomBOOM! Badabada! BoomBoomBOOM!

Gary has to slow down as he listens, a bit shocked as it only grows louder.

BoomBoomBOOM! Badabada! BoomBoomBOOM!

Eventually, even the water around him can't muffle out the noise enough as the source continues to draw closer at amazing speeds.

Shocked, Gary quickly realizes that they are already almost on him, his senses telling him that they are speeding his way. He quickly moves, darting for the water's surface as the raft is cutting through the water faster than Gary thought possible.

It doesn't matter how fast they are moving! The raft is made out of wood and just one bite is all he needs to break the thing. And even if he fails to stop them here, it just means he gets to move on to the part he enjoys the most. The chase!

Breaking out of the water's surface and exploding into the air, Gary's world is suddenly filled with the deafening sound of a beating drum. The noise is bouncing off the walls and shaking the water as the beat penetrates his own scales and reverberates off his bones.

BoomBoomBOOM! Badabada! BoomBoomBOOM!

It's almost enough to stun Gary. To make him freeze up and stop, if he could, but he is already in the air now a good foot or two above the water, practically flying towards a raft that is moving far too quickly.

Pushing through all the confusion with every instinct he has as a hunter, Gary opens his jaw wide as he goes for the raft. He barely registers that there appears to be more than three people on the thing or that they are mostly all skeletons. He just needs to tear a good chunk out of this raft!

And then suddenly, a massive, scale covered fist is filling his vision.

With a hard punch to the side of the head Gary gets sent flying to the side and splash back into the water, stunned and bleeding from the nose.

Floating in the water for a second, blinking and shaking his head as he tries to push down the confusion, the raft goes speeding past. A few second later, a second and third raft come flying through the water, pursuing the first. Gary peaks out of the water and sees a bunch of monsters that look like bipedal rats operating the rafts as they yell at each other and try to shoot arrows at the Intruders. That's new…

Is Gary supposed to eat them too?

//Orders: Eliminate the Invaders! DO NOT LET THEM ESCAPE!

Yes, yes, yes Dungeon… Gary will do his job, don't worry. He doesn't know about the other rafts full of rats, but for now he just needs to catch up and eat whoever that was that just punched him. He has a job to do, and he is going to enjoy this!

Bug looks back as they go speeding away, her arm shifting back to normal as her hair and ears flap in the wind.

"Was that the Boss!?" Bug yells over the sound of Mimmie's music, the girl still pounding away at that drum with her entire heart and soul behind it.

Susan yells back, her sword held in hand as she deflects an arrow out the air. "Yes! That was Gary! He'll be chasing us now, good job on blocking him! The tanks usually struggle with that!"

The archers in the walls can only scream as the raft goes speeding away. They had only one chance to get their shots off and now they are being left behind. Some of them jump onto the pursuing rafts as they follow, joining the other screaming rats as they continue to fire arrows after them. But the skeletons are moving too fast, and all the arrows uselessly hit the water behind them, never getting close.

Even with a dozen of them rowing on each raft, they just can't catch up to the endless stamina of a team of skeletons rowing to the beat of the drum. The best they can do is try and keep up as they chase after Bug and co.'s perfect set of rear ends.

Behind them, Bug sees as the big gator she just smacked is breaking out of the water and swimming quickly to catch up as well now. With every motion of his massive tail water is sent splashing everywhere and waves are made, wetting the walls as they break against the bricks.

"And I thought you said this was supposed to be a straight shot all the way down! This isn't anything like you mentioned!" Bug yells over the music.

"It isn't! I think the Dungeon changed! I didn't know it could do this!"

"Of course it can! The cheating thing is trying to up the difficulty, hahahaha! Let it! Try and stop me, Dungeon! Try!!!!!" Bug screams and laughs at the ceiling, her heart pumping to the beat of the drum.

The Dungeon did this because of her! All because of Bug!

This is it, isn't it?

The Dungeon has finally recognized her as so much of a threat that it had to change itself in order to challenge her! All for BUG!

Had it ever done this for the humans? No. Why would it? All it had had to do was stick to the status quo and wait for idiots to eventually die inside of it.

But for Bug?

"HahahahahahaHAHAHAHA!!! Now this is what I am talking about, Dungeon! Fight back as much as you can! Struggle and writhe as I tear you apart you one floor at a time! I will take you head on and win!"

As Bug is losing her mind and laughing like a maniac, their raft goes speeding towards an area where both sides of the waterway are occupied with what looks like a village of huts made out of scrap wood and garbage. More of those bipedal rats are living in this village and their warriors are scrambling as they woman and children are screaming and making for their homes. Archers are running to the shores with their bows and slings at the ready, warriors to the bridge that extends up and over the waterway with their spears and swords and shields.

Bug doesn't seem to care in the slightest and is still reveling in her insanity. Elaine is still playing the drum, so lost in the rhythm that her eyes are closed as she puts her everything into her music. Susan curses and yells out, "Ready for combat!"

Arrows fly and most of them hit the skeleton rowers, doing nothing. Skeletons don't care about getting shot, and they just continue to row. Susan deflects what she can, her body moving like lightning as she intercepts a dozen out of the air with quick motions of her blade. In the back, Elaine doesn't even flinch. Bug had already placed her giant axe wielding skeleton, named Zax, next to her and ordered to defend her with its unlife. The big guy simple tanks all the arrows and blocks any that would get past him with the side of his woodcutter's axe, letting not a single arrow near Elaine. Bug simple continue to laugh, her massive wings expanding from her back as she slaps aside all the arrows coming her way.

Moving under a rain of arrows, they quickly approach the bridge. The warriors, as soon as the raft draws near, jump over the side without hesitation. Most of them manage to land on the raft, making it rock as the extra weight hits it. Some miss or end up falling off, screaming as they splash into the water. Behind them as the raft continues to speed away without stopping, those unlucky rats get eaten by a perusing Gary, letting out one last loud squeak before they get munched.

The warriors quickly move into combat, charging as they swing their weapons at Bug and Susan. The two effortlessly tear the attackers apart, quite literally in Bug's case as she grows her arms and claws and uses them to rip an unfortunate rat down the middle, tossing the two halves into the water.

The enemies pale at the sight of it, but they don't stop fighting as they continue to throw themselves at the two and get slaughtered. Near the front of the raft, the most dressed and armored rat, who is probably in charge, sees that this is already a lost battle. Killing these two simply isn't an option.

He needs to stop the raft.

Disengaging from the fight as the others are getting cut to pieces, he makes for the nearest rowing skeleton and tries to smash it with his sword.

"Oh no you don't!" Bug yells over the music.

Pulling a poisoned throwing knife from her belt with one free hand, she throws it past two other rats and nails the leader in the side of his head. He should have worn a helmet.

His body goes falling off the raft and into the water, leaving the remaining rats to panic as they are cut down one at a time with cruel efficiency. The last living rat quickly flees and dives into the water to try and escape, but he just ends up getting eaten by Gary anyways.

Behind them, the two rafts are still following, and continue to do so as the rats scream and heckle at their back in whatever weird rat language it is they are using. It's probably just gibberish.

They take a turn, hardly slowing down as they continue to move downstream. Up ahead, the path splits into three and with how fast they are going, Bug only has a moment to consider.

"Which way!?" She yells as she asks Susan.

"I don't know! It's supposed to be a straight path!"

Screw it, when is doubt, go left.

Giving a mental order to the rowers, she has them turn the boat down the left passage. Mimmie doesn't slow for a second with her music. If anything, she is only getting faster as sweat is flowing down her face and soaking her shirt, her hair a mess as she rocks her head to the beat.

"Keep it going, baby! Mommy is proud of you!"