NOVEL NEXT Chapter 12: Chapter 12
Frustration…
That's what it was. She had woken some time ago, not in a pleasant mood. She had been sitting on the bed contemplating the events of last night.
They had shared something personal with each other. It felt special, especially in light of what happened when they bid each other goodnight. Her body was acting on its' own accord, the other part of her brain becoming very vocal. She really wanted to kiss him. But she wasn't entirely sure about who he was. And a very public display like that would not have gone over well with the council. Maybe Hiccup knew this too, which would explain why he kissed her hands.
She sighed, thinking about that sent her heart fluttering along with the rest of her insides. That darker part of her brain imagining his lips on hers, her hands running through his hair, across his chest. The other part was interested too, for curiosity's' sake if nothing else. She wished she could… explore this… thing with Hiccup further. But there was not enough time now. Especially with all the festivities, and all the visiting dignitaries.
She resolved to talk to Anna, but she suspected she had ideas of her own, if she was planning to have Hiccup invited to lunch. She thought she would also talk to Rapunzel. Maybe she could help her work through these… feelings. Why all of a sudden, she couldn't help being distracted so often… why there was this… need to spend time with him, talk to him. Rapunzel was right! It was altogether confusing, frightening, and wonderful!
Those thoughts would have to wait for now. She had a full day ahead of her, indeed a whole week of full days! She sighed again walking to the bathroom to wash her face. She put on a simple dress, and quickly tied her hair. There were a few papers to go over before breakfast. Anna met her in the hallway, and they walked side by side to her office. She could tell something was on her mind, but she chose not to speak it for now.
There was a fresh pot of coffee on a tray on her desk. And after pouring their cups, Anna reached for the letters, while Elsa had a few proclamations, and a trade agreement to look over. They sat in silence over their tasks until Anna spoke.
"Elsa? W, would you,… do you want me to, -try to set up something… private for you and Hiccup? A meal, or maybe something… in the office here?" She bit her lip. Elsa could tell she was apprehensive.
"I, I -would! Anna, very much I think! But The council will want to know who he was and what business he had with Arendelle. We just can't go and ask anyone we want to the castle. I'm sure we could come up with an excuse for one meal, or something like that. But we will need something else for a… more… permanent arrangement. I'm sure Hiccup would come, but if he is being… discreet as we think, he may not want any attention drawn to himself."
"You're right. And you can't keep sneaking out of the castle yourself too!" She furrowed her brow in thought for a moment, "Don't worry Elsa, I'll see what I can do. You've got enough on your mind as it is. And, I'll talk to Rapunzel too! Maybe she will have some ideas!"
"Thank you Anna! You're right! I have so much going on right now… I, I'm glad you're here." She looked at her sister earnestly.
"I can imagine! What with the way he said goodbye last night!" She said teasingly, wiggling her brow.
"I… I almost kissed him! Right there in front of everyone!" This elicited a squeal from Anna.
"Ooooohh! I almost wish I could be there when you do! Just to see the look on your face! It will be worth all the early mornings and boring meetings for a year! Maybe two!" Both girls broke out into a fit of giggles. Anna reached across the desk and grasped Elsas' hand. "Don't worry Sis! I've got this!"
They rose from their chairs, and left for their own chambers, walking hand in hand all the way. Breakfast was going to be quite the affair. She expected a full table. Elsa was thankful for their little moment of quiet together before all hel broke loose.
Breakfast was indeed huge! There was not an empty space to be had on the large table. Her whole council was there, along with all the visiting ministers housed in the castle. A few dignitaries had arrived this morning, with more expected to arrive before the opening ceremonies. Anna sat on her left, as per usual. Rapunzel and Eugene sat on her right. There was more than enough food to go around, as well as conversation. She did her best to engage as many people as she could.
When the meal was finished, she rose, and thanked everyone for attending. She promised the upcoming ceremonies would be a sight to see! She left the room with Anna, Rapunzel, and Eugene trailing. They stopped outside the door and talked for a few moments, before they parted to prepare for the festivities. Eugene promised to speak to Hiccup, to which Rapunzel replied.
"Just make sure you speak to him as Eugene, and not Prince!" He took mock-offence at the jibe.
"Hey! What can possibly go wrong?" All the girls gave him a flat look. He sighed in resignation "OK Fine! I'll be nice!"
They went their separate ways, Elsa to her room to change and possibly relax a little before. She was dressed in a blue green dress with a deep purple bodice trimmed in a lighter shade of purple. He hair was tied in a single braid that was wrapped tightly around her head. Her crown was placed atop her head, and she was ready. She found she had a small amount of time, so she relaxed in her chair closing her eyes. Her thoughts drifting to a pair of emerald green eyes, looking through his eyelashes, softly and languorously kissing her hands.
Her time was over too soon. She got up and left the room. Anna fell in step at her side and they made their way to the doors. As they waited to be announced, she cast a sidelong glance at Anna. Her sister was practically bursting with excitement over the show to come. She smiled at her and gave her a wink.
As if on cue, the doors opened. The crowd roared and cheered as she walked out. Elsa really enjoyed these moments. Where her subjects would show their love and appreciation. She smiled and waved and basked in the glow of the crowd. It was a beautiful day as well. It seemed nothing could go wrong.
After the crowd had stilled a little, she spoke. "Welcome everyone! To Arendelles' annual spring festival!" More cheers and clapping. "Please! Take in all the kingdom has to offer! We have booths set up where our finest craftsmen are showing their wares! The artisans will be showing their skill and imagination as they carve sculptures and the walls around the courtyard! Our growers will be showing their prized plants and flowers! Breeders showing their livestock near the stables!" There was another pause for the crowd…"And as a gift, the finest chefs and cooks from around the kingdom will be preparing all manner of dishes for lunch and dinner, to be served by the palace staff!" They really seemed to like that idea, as they roared almost as much as when she arrived! Just one more thing…"And as a special gift, from the Princess and I, the palace gardens will be open to all! They are especially lovely this time of year!" Another shout went up from the crowd. She loved it! It made her feel warm inside. After the troubles of the past, to be this loved and accepted was more than she could ever have hoped for… now it was time for the show!
She walked down the steps, arms outstretched so the people would give her room. Looking down and closing her eyes, she took a moment. Focus! Concentrate… She raised her hands above her head, as the snow began to swirl about them, she created a large crystalline snowflake about twelve feet across. She then caused it to slowly rise above the crowd, going higher and higher, until she was sure it could be seen all across the town. It was pure and transparent, and would show all the colors of the rainbow when the suns' angle was just right. OOOHs an AAAHs came from the crowd. Some were just looking at the crystal, mouths agape. She was just getting started!
With another wave of first her right arm and hand, then her left, the fountains on either side of the stairs froze into delicate and beautiful ice sculptures. She then was going to do something she hadn't done since she built her ice palace. She walked quickly around in a circle, arm stretched, the palm of her hand to the ground. Once, twice, on the third circuit, she stepped into the middle of her circle. With a flourish of her arms, starting below her waist, raising them over her head whilst rotating her wrists, frost burst out in all directions. It traveled along the ground at the crowds' feet. It impacted the walls, and climbed upwards, which left the woodwork highlighted in glowing ice. She then, with palms out, made as though she was smoothing a piece of paper, at which time, a thick coating of ice formed on the walls. This was for the artisans to carve their works on. Much cheering was coming from the crowd. She saw them smiling and clapping. Just one more thing…
She noticed a young boy and a smaller girl standing in front, mouths open staring in wonder at the Queens' creations. She whispered at them "Hey!" She crouched down to their level, and motioned for them to come closer. They did somewhat hesitantly. Until she started rotating her arms and hands in front of her, creating a glowing ball of snow. She first looked to one child, then the next. "Are you ready?" She asked them. They nodded at the same time, eyes wide.
She rose to her feet flinging the ball high in the sky. With a loud pop, it exploded, showering the courtyard with pure sparkling crystals. The crowd erupted, clapping and cheering. She heard her name, and also calls of 'long live Queen Elsa!' It made her eyes sting with happiness. She looked upon the children again who were jumping and laughing.
"And who do we have here?" She asked them.
"Ahhh, Uhhh, Hen, Henrich! Your Majesty!" She was taken aback by his textbook bow, deep and respectful.
She curtsied deeply back at him. "Well met! Master Henrich!" He smiled widely. She gave him a wink and ruffled his hair.
The girl took a few tentative steps and dipped. "And I'm Kirsten!"
"Lady Kirsten! How good of you to come!" She stood at Elsas' feet arms outstretched, she didn't notice the doll before. Her heart clenched at the sight of this little one looking up at her so earnestly. She had a momentary flash of a vision. A small child, with silver-blond hair and bright green eyes… She shook it off and picked little Kirsten up, settling her on her hip. "And who is this?" She said motioning at the doll.
"This is Princess Snowdrop! And she's very glad to meet you!" She said brightly. Elsa shook the dolls' tiny hand. It was made of cloth, wearing a slightly tattered blue-green dress. She had eyes and a mouth embroidered on her face. Her hair was made of yarn, dyed a light brown, braided in two pigtails. A crown was sewn to her head.
"She's very pretty!" Elsa told her.
"Thank you! I, I want to be a princess someday…" She said.
"Well little one…" She bopped her nose with her finger. "You must have hope! Because we never know what life has in store for us!" Kirsten smiled brightly. "Yes! My Queen!"
Elsa smiled. "Now listen to your parents, and have a good time!" She told her.
"I will!" She threw her arms around Elsas' neck, hugging her. Her heart gave another twinge. Strange she thought, she had never felt this… before. Elsa hugged her back before handing her off to her grateful parents. She straightened and looked upon the people in front of her. She smiled brightly at the love and adoration coming from her subjects. She did not see the one face she had hoped to see…
She turned and mounted the stairs stopping at the top. She faced her people smiling and waving. She felt a hand clasp hers, and they both stood for a few more moments for the crowd.
"That was so sweet!" Anna said. "You haven't done that… before." If Anna looked at her and saw her eyes were over-bright, she would not be able to explain it. Perhaps it was everything. The reaction of the crowd towards her, sharing something special with those children, the hope that came from that small vision… All she could say was that she was enjoying this moment.
And then the moment was over. She turned and headed back towards the palace. Her entourage in tow. Another change of clothes was in order. Then a short meeting with her council. After that, it was private audiences with a number of dignitaries and ministers for the rest of the day.
She arrived at the door to her chambers before she realized. She had been brooding, -a little… she guessed. Anna gave her a worried look. Elsa noticed Eugene speaking to Rapunzel quietly, before they shared a kiss and he left them.
"Elsa?" Anna gave her a look, but said nothing. "I'll see you in a bit…" She appeared to have more to say, but didn't. Elsa gave her a sheepish look.
"OK Anna, I'll… I'll see you… later." She went through the door and it closed behind her. She didn't realize she wasn't alone until Rapunzel spoke.
"That was some display Elsa! And those children! That was very sweet of you!"
"Yes! umm, thanks… thank you…" Her thoughts were all over the place.
"Elsa? What's wrong?" It must have been obvious by now.
"I, I… didn't -see him in, in the courtyard…" She had to get some of this off her mind, before it got the best of her.
"I'm sure there was a good reason Elsa. Anyway, Eugene has gone to see him. I have a good feeling about it!" Elsa only nodded. "Is, is there something else?" Rapunzel could help she knew it.
"It was… just seeing those children, I had… it reminded me of when Anna and I when we were children…" She huffed a laugh, "We used to sneak into the ballroom, and I would use my magic and we would play when Anna couldn't sleep…" She smiled on the memory. "But, but that little girl… I, I had a vision flash through my mind, a child I have never seen before… and when, when she hugged me…"
Rapunzel put her and on her arm "Elsa, it's natural, as we get older. Thoughts of marriage and children. My heart went out to you as I watched. I felt the same. Especially now that I'm married. Eugene and I both want children, and it hasn't been from a lack of trying!" She wiggled her eyebrows. Part of her was shocked, the darker part of Elsas' brain that was becoming more vocal, wanted to hear more.
"Elsa, maybe you're feeling you are as close as you have ever been. With the way you're feeling… about him…?" She was right. Although she wasn't sure what she felt for Hiccup, it was different than anything else she felt before.
"I'ts, -it's just… frustrating not knowing if he is what we think he is…"
"Don't worry, Elsa! We'll get it sorted for you! And if he turns out, we'll get you two some… alone time!" She raised her brow at her suggestively. This caused them both to giggle. Elsa was grateful for the support.
"It's not easy for us, we aren't always able to choose who we're with." Rapunzel said. "We're bound by what we are more than who we are. But Elsa, I have a good feeling about this! You'll see!" Elsa wished she could share her optimism, but was heartened by her words. She thanked Rapunzel, and shared a hug before parting. She felt lighter, and more able to focus on the rest of her day.
The first of her meetings went well, with discussion of the attacks and pledges of cooperation. There was also renewing old ties and some catching up with neighbors. She was surprised when she learned Prince Eugene had asked for a moment of her time, between meetings. What he told her was heartening, if not slightly troublesome still.
He hadn't been at the opening ceremonies after all. But he had promised the smith he would look after the shop for him while he was at the booth in the courtyard. She respected that. Her opinion of him soared. He had given his word, and that was his bond. It also spoke volumes about his trustworthiness.
So he was a leader, although he hadn't come out and said it, Eugene was sure of it. She trusted him and his judgement. As far as him not declaring himself, she could understand. There were several times where she wished to just get away from all the pomp and circumstance. To just be herself. But in light of… recent developments… between them. It didn't help. As a Prince or a Lord, they could… meet… and, -things… under the guise of negotiations. A slight stretch of the truth, but no one would be suspicious, and if they were, well, she was the Queen…
The idea of him protecting someone, she had mixed feelings. She admired his loyalty to this… person whoever he was. It must be fierce! But she lived in a castle dammit! High stone walls. A whole garrison of guards. An army, and warships at her beck and call. Not to mention her powers themselves. Sure, she could understand. He had not been here for very long. And she knew the world was not a kind place for the unwary…
This all made her situation better, and at the same time worse. She felt elated, a little giddy even, that he was at least a royal, an equal. But at the same time, an almost desperate need came upon her to talk to him. To find out more about him and where he came from, and… things. The one side of her brain giving way to all manner of scenarios, the other side not objecting that much.
She sighed, and chose to take heart that he wasn't some nefarious character after her kingdom. He was a man. A handsome, strong man, -with beautiful green eyes and auburn hair she could spend days twisting her fingers in… Aaaaand there she went… She shook her thoughts, until she also took heart in that Anna, Rapunzel, and even Eugene would help in getting them some time… alone… together… Yep, gone again!
She had three more meetings before it was time for lunch. It too was a big affair. With more dignitaries showing up this morning. Kristoff had finally joined them, much to Annas' relief. Elsa now understood why she had not been there for the meetings. The conversations were on the ceremonies, and the festival itself. She received many compliments, and thanked them in kind. She made sure to engage each person in earnest.
The meal was over before too long, and everyone parted company. Anna with Kristoff, and Rapunzel with Eugene. This left her a few moments to go over some more paperwork, and another change of clothes before her next round of meetings.
At her office, she had just finished the last item. She pushed her chair back and slumped, sighing. It was hard to focus after these new developments concerning Hiccup. She managed, barely. She rose and walked over to the window. Looking out over the courtyard, she could see her people walking about.
As she looked harder, she thought she could see… Yes! a tall young man, with brown hair, with, with a woman on his arm? She felt a rush of… anger? -jealousy!? Strange, but she quashed those feelings… a bit… She caught a glint on metal on the woman's' head. A man was standing in front of them, bowing deeply. It was then she realized… yes! She recognized the color of the dress. It was Rapunzel that was with him! Another pang of… jealousy? struck her. She quickly stamped those down too. Rapunzel was family, a friend, and married too! It helped -a little. She dearly wished it was her on that arm, looking at those eyes. Sharing a laugh as it appeared they were now doing. She sighed again, and tried not to despair. She knew she would see him again soon. And hopefully at least talk… and… things… alone!
Finally! -Alone! She sat and went over in her mind the events of the day. The afternoon had gone well. Her meetings brought about nothing but a few agreements over trade and exchange rates. Also a few more reports of attacks on shipping, but no information as to who was carrying them out. She pledged a warship to help find those responsible.
Dinner was a big event as well. Much talk over the success of the festival, and it wasn't even over yet. There was also talk of the state dinner and the ball, which was to be held in two days. The mention of this seemed to spark something in Anna, but she said nothing. She would just give her a glance, and Elsa thought she could see a glint of mischief in her eyes. Knowing Anna, it could mean anything…
She had been in her room a little while after dinner, when she was visited by Rapunzel. She told Elsa of her time with Hiccup. Although he hadn't come out and said it, again! She was able to confirm what Eugene had said. She told her of their conversations. Rapunzel judging him to be very smart, and politically savvy. Also funny, and loyal. Elsa was taken aback by the fact he was married once, and his wife had been killed. Although as a royal, she was expected to fight for her kingdom, women warriors were uncommon in this part of the world. Her heart went out to him. Even though she had never been married, she could imagine how hard it must be to loose someone you loved so fiercely.
Hiccup… she nearly breathed his name. She sat there in the warm water, letting the days' toil melt from her body. Thoughts of him flitted through her mind. His hair, his eyes, his hands holding her, caressing her. The thought of his lips on hers sent a wave of heat straight to her core. She had felt this before, although this time, it was stronger. Almost a burning need. To be with him, -to share things with him. Both emotional, and… physical. This sent her thoughts down a path of forbidden pleasures. Of soft touches, and hungry lips. Touching, caressing…
She opened her eyes, and blinked. She didn't remember closing them. These thoughts would only lead to more frustration. Especially with her inability to… act on them as of yet. She sighed, it was time to put her thoughts, and herself to bed. She rose out of the bathtub and dried herself off. She pulled on a nightgown and crawled into bed. She fell asleep quickly, dreaming of green eyes, soft touches, and a soft smile.