Tears of Dusk

57 - The Stress of Evaluations



Jadwia Lichtfreund sat in the corner of the Library and was so immersed in her writing that her nose could almost touch the paper. Her head disappeared behind stacks of books she had taken out of the shelves as she entered. She wasn’t sure she needed half of them, but she couldn’t take any chances. She sometimes felt the need to cross-check what she read, just in case.

The tip of her pencil had become dull by the time she reached the bottom of her page. She sighed, gave it a final read then laid it flat on top of the rest of the papers she wrote today. As she was about to grab her pencil sharpener on the other side of the table, she startled and stifled a shriek.

Isyd Wybrany was seated across her. His eyes were their usual dark and bottomless but his lips betrayed a faint smirk at her surprised reaction.

“Since when you’re here?” Jadwia hissed at him, mindful not to raise her voice so as not to disturb the other Pupils in the Library.

“It’s been a few minutes. I was waiting for you to notice me,” Isyd said, handing her the pencil sharpener.

Jadwia threw back the frizzled hair that had escaped her ponytail and fallen in front of her face.

“You could have said something…”

“I didn’t want to disturb you. You seemed focused to the extreme. Are you cleaning up your notes?”

“No, I was done with that weeks ago. I realized yesterday that I was done reading for all the courses so I started writing essays on possible questions they may ask in the Evaluations!”

She saw Isyd glance down to the twenty or so papers filled recto-verso with tidy writings. The look he then gave her was circumspect.

Jadwia felt the need to justify herself. “This way, whatever they ask me, I’ll be ready because I’d already have prepared the subjects! You should do the same, Isyd!”

“Thanks, but I will pass. I prefer improvising and relying on my memory.” He fetched down something and made it slide across the table. “Here, I give it back to you.”

The thick book was about the history of the Duchy of Khruss and was part of her private collection of books she had brought with her after leaving home.

“You are finished already? It’s only been two days!”

“I read it yesterday night and finished it a bit before dawn.”

“All of it? When did you find time to sleep?”

“I didn’t.”

Jadwia looked enviously at Isyd’s rested face. She had an idea of how she looked with the dark circles under her eyes, chafed lips and her pale complexion. It wasn’t fair that he appeared so calm when the stress of the Evaluations crushed every other Pupil.

Isyd seemed to read her mind on her face. “You looked even more tired than the last time I saw you. Did you do what I asked?”

She looked away, not answering, and shrugged.

Isyd sighed. “I said I’d help you with the Holy Arts, but it is only possible if you follow my instructions.”

“You told me to stop practicing!”

“I told you to rest! There’s only so much you can do by running yourself ragged. Giving time for your mind and body to rest is as important as studying.”

Jadwia leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. She had a stubborn expression on her face, an expression that Isyd had become familiar with.

“I know I can’t count on the Holy Arts to carry through my Evaluations,” she said. “That’s why I am studying the other subjects so hard. Hopefully, my results in Mathematics and Natural Sciences and History will be sufficient for the Tutors to allow me to continue next semester, no matter if I fail the Application of the Arts…”

“You are somehow convinced that you will fail before even starting. You forget that except for me, you are probably the most skilled in the Holy Arts of the class.”

“And it is still not enough! You saw the last test we had with Tutor Milwyk; only Boshena and Kewin were able to pass… If this is the extent of my skills, then…”

“Still, you cannot believe the Tutors will expel you for failing one exercise. If this is the criterium, then there’ll be no Pupil left for the second semester.”

“They do not need to exclude me… the Evaluations will decide the tuition will need to pay to continue next semester. The better the results, the lower it is. If the Pupil is excellent”— she gave Isyd a pointed look —“there’s even the chance of not having to pay anything. If the tuition I am assigned is too expensive, I won’t be able to continue my studies at the Academy. So, unless you know a way to make me reach the 2nd Opening by next week and guarantee me a free tuition, I will spend the rest of my time studying!”

Isyd said nothing for a while. His face was expressionless but his gaze was intense. Jadwia looked to the side, to the window that opened onto the Fields. She couldn’t recognize her reflection due to the sunrays interacting with the thickness of the glass; it appeared as if her hair were longer and her eyes iridescent.

“I could pay for your tuition,” Isyd said suddenly.

Jadwia slowly turned toward him and met his serious eyes. He had not said that in jest. She looked down on her empty paper and tried to steady her pencil that was trembling in her hand.

“Are you so unworried by the Evaluations that you can afford to propose that?” she said with a forced laugh.

“I am not worried indeed. Even if I were to seriously fail the Evaluations – which I don’t expect to do – I have stumbled onto new money recently. A lot of money. Enough for me to pay for any tuition they throw my way and have many more to spare. This is why I proposed it to you. Think of it as a gift from your Ringleader.”

“This is not what we agreed on when I joined your Ring. At least, that’s not how I pictured you helping me…”

“You’ve just said that there’s only one week left before the Evaluations. I can only help you realize your potential in the Arts if you continue your studies. Your place is here at the Academy, Jadwia.”

Jadwia swallowed hard. Her place? At the Academy? Could she dare hope…? She knew what was hanging on the balance. The crushing weight of consequences never left her shoulders, not since she snuck out of her bedroom and escaped her home. It was with her at every instance, at every moment spent in the Academy; it was this weight that pushed her to study as much as she did. If she failed the Evaluations, she would be forced to return home… Knowing that, she could accept his offer. A simple “yes” would suffice…

And yet the word refused to pass her lips.

Isyd was about to say something, but he suddenly stopped and looked to the side. Following his gaze, Jadwia turned to see three seconds later Boshena Wyater and Tatyana Chud appeared at the corner of the aisle.

“You’re here!” Tatyana said. “You have to hear this!”

The young woman was out of breath and trembling with excitement. Jadwia turned to Boshena who was more composed.

“What’s happening?”

“The Evaluations! We don’t need to take them!” Boshena said.


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