Synth

Marissa was oddly quiet after Tham had left, confusing TO, who thought that she wanted to speak with them.

“Is everything alright?” they asked. Maybe something was wrong, something that was hard to talk about. They suddenly remembered her brother, who they had rescued from the indebted center. He had been weak from malnutrition, as were several others. “Is your brother alright?” perhaps they hadn’t recovered as the others had, or perhaps there was some kind of complication which sprang from their malnutrition.

Her eyes widened, and her tentacles stilled around her. “Oh…Oh yes,” she said, her color fading slightly to cool red. “Yes, he’s fine.” She looked away. “Well, mostly fine, I suppose. He’s still weak, but he’s getting better.”

“He’s eating well, then.” TO said, “That’s good. If I recall, he was more malnourished than many of the others... which is odd. At the very least, the indebted center is supposed to ensure that people have the food they need, and accommodate for any medical issues.” They wrinkled up their snout, their ears pinning back, “Of course, that doesn’t mean the food they’ll give you is any good”

“W-well, I suppose that’s the problem.” She said, “My brother is... picky. and I don’t mean like a kid is picky and doesn’t want to eat vegetables, no. I mean, He seems to have some strange phobia of certain kinds of textures. Of course, they don’t really count that as a dietary or medical issue. Even without us leaving the planet and all, if you left him in there, he’d probably starve to death.”

“... The food isn’t that bad.” TO said, frowning, “I mean, it’s awful, but it should make anyone sick”

“My brother has something like a phobia for certain textures.” She said, frowning, “And...it happens to be the same texture as the glop they serve in the indebted center.” She shook her head. “Can you imagine having to eat something you’re terrified of just to survive? He did his best, but...”

TO was about to point out that they hate bugs, but they eat them every day... of course, they couldn’t even look at their food if it looked like a bug. Since they got here, their food had either been shelled so that it looked nothing like a bug, or worked into different shapes and textures.

Then, TO had an abjectly horrifying thought. What if they were hematophagous? What if they had to drink blood every single day, multiple times a day, in order to survive? Would they be able to do it? They’d try for sure, but they didn’t know how much they could handle without throwing up, or fainting.

“I didn’t know someone could have a thing like that.” TO said, their ears dipping down, “Your brother is very brave, very strong to manage as they did.”

Marissa suddenly smiled and gave a soft chuckle as she shook her head. “Strong, sure, but it’s more likely that he’s just determined and willful.” She sighed, “You know, when we were younger, I’d have to babysit him from time to time, and I hated it. If he decided to do something, or decided he wasn’t going to do something, nothing and nobody could stop him. I guess he decided he was going to survive that place.”

“I’m very glad he’s ok.” TO said, “And that you and him will be leaving with us”

As they spoke, she cleared her throat and looked aside once more, their color reddening once more. “Yeah. I Uh... I wanted to thank you for that.” She said, “You know, getting him out of there.”

“Well... I was there for a bunch of people!” TO said, their own ears warming. It was a pleasant change to have a civilian thanking them for what they did, sure, but they weren’t used to it.

“Well... I still wanted to thank you!” she insisted, “And... if there’s anything I can do for you-“

“That’s entirely unnecessary!” TO said, “Really. You’re working hard enough with loading up the ship, and you really should spend some time with your brother before we take off tomorrow.” Their ears dipped, “I... don’t know how we’re going to do tomorrow, but just in case, spend time with the people you care about.”

Marissa was quiet for a moment, then nodded and headed to the elevator. She pushed the button, but as she was waiting for it to come back up, she spun around again. Her face was several shades darker than it had been a moment before, and she twisted her tentacles into tight coils.

“Is it true that DH is your partner?”

“My partner?” They frowned. “I mean, they’re working more with Goretta at the moment.”

She sighed, “No, not like that.” she said, “I mean... Is it true they’re your romantic partner?”

Despite the fact that most of the people they spoke to on a day-to-day basis now knew that they and DH had a romantic relationship, and despite the fact that there was nothing wrong with such a thing here, they still felt that odd twist to their stomach as their ears dipped and flushed. “Why do you ask?” their ears pinned back almost defensively as they spoke.

“I... Wanted to know if you had a partner?”

“Yes, but why?”

Her color deepened, and for a moment it looked as though she wanted to run away. A moment passed, and she closed her eyes and balled her hands into fists.

“Because... Because if you didn’t, I was wondering if you... wanted a partner...”

TO was already feeling relatively stupid after being absolutely destroyed by Flit in that game earlier. Now, as they recalled being told several times by several people that Marissa had a ‘crush’ on them, that feeling grew exponentially.

“Sorry, that’s a weird way to phrase it.” Marissa continued, “I mean, uh, if you... if you wanted to spend some time-“

“I-I’m sorry.” TO said, their ears low and blue as they wished they could just disappear, “Apologies. Uh, it’s not- it wasn’t wise to talk about that kind of thing back when I was...Still a synth.” They cleared their throat, “I shouldn’t have been so defensive”

“No, no, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. It was a stupid question-“

“It wasn’t.” TO said as they looked away, “Uh... DH is my... my partner, I suppose.” Could they rewind time? physics said no, but if there was any way to break physics and reverse the last few minutes so that they could have handled this with a little more grace, they would. “Though, we normally just say mate.” information flooded their mind, the studying they had done of the last few days tumbling out of their mouth, “Actually, in Chilacian, it would be Erasti. Normally every Chilacian will end up with an Erasti, unless they’re an Ankyra. that’s something like the center of the family, I suppose. Avery is mine-” They paused, “You... know Avery, yes?”

“Y-yes,” she said, her color fading off once more since she now seemed more confused than anything else by the sudden flood of information from TO. “I... I asked them, but I wasn’t sure if they really understood.” She looked away, “But... but yeah. No. Uh, Erasti is a romantic partner, right?”

“Right.”

“And... DH is yours, right?”

TO nodded, their ears flushing once more. It was still so odd for them to just be able to say that, and a part of them still expected to see that specific flicker of ears that showed such disgust, despite the fact that she hardly had any ears, and what she did have she couldn’t move.

“That’s good,” she said after a minute, and as she turned away from them, TO could see the hint of tears forming in her eyes. “I’m happy for you”

“I’m sorry.” TO said in a soothing voice.

“No... no, I’m sorry. I Uh... I shouldn’t have asked.”

Having never been in this situation before, TO had no idea what they were supposed to do. This wasn’t normally a part of any shows they had seen; most shows skimmed over these situations, and let the characters speak about it afterwards. “Is... is there anything I can do?” They finally asked. “You’re upset... is there anything I can do to help?”

Marissa gave a bitter laugh and turned away, her hand going to her face. “You could forget this conversation ever happened.” She said.

“I’m not good at forgetting things...” TO said, “But... I can promise not to bring it up, and not to think about it in the future?”

“That would be great. thanks.” She mumbled.

The elevator door finally opened up. It took so long that TO was certain that some people moving about food supplies must have been using it. The moment the doors slid open, Marissa dodged inside and pressed the button. There was an awkward few seconds where neither of them said anything, then the doors blissfully closed.

with a groan, TO sat back on a storage box, and put their face in their hands. Maybe if they had been a little more aware, or if they hadn’t been so anxious about being asked what DH was to them, then maybe they could have handled that better and she wouldn’t have left in tears. They didn’t even know her that well, but she was one of the few civilians who had always been kind to TO. The idea that maybe now she’d avoid them left a distinctly unpleasant feeling in their stomach, and they silently wished that there was some way they could make this situation better, some way they could make things easier for her.

Romance was a difficult situation and TO was only just getting a handle on their own romantic life; they weren’t in any position to help anyone else in this field.

======

“Hey heartbreaker.” Tham said when TO left the elevator several minutes later.

“Don’t” TO hissed, their ears pinning back, “I feel awful.”

Tham sighed, “I get that.” He said. “Though she’s been told had a partner. I don’t know. Maybe she thought you were open to other partners.”

TO groaned as they rubbed the space between their eyes. “What do I do?” they asked. “I didn’t want to make her feel bad. What do I do? How do I fix this?”

Tham laughed much more honestly and heartedly than TO expected, or had ever heard before. “Well, first of all, you can’t fix it.” He shook their head, and let a brief grin cross his face, “Second... Well, I’d not worry too much about it.”

“But she’s upset!” TO said, “And it’s my fault-“

“Well, no, it’s not.” Tham said, “But either way, she won’t be upset for long”

TO blinked, their ears flicking forward once more. “How do you know that?”

“Pearla knows her relatively well.” Tham said, “She used to come to the old shelter before she got thrown into the indebted program. Now, I don’t know specifics, but Pearla said she’s the kind to fall for a person fast. She’s also, apparently, the type who gets up again and falls again really fast.” they smirked at TO, “So, I’m willing to bet that by the time we’re on that ship in the morning, she’s fallen for someone else.”