Synth

Epsiode 366: Insane



The silence once again dragged out between the two, this time even longer than it had before. It was especially frustration to TO this time, as the situation entirely confused them. The ‘her’ that Beck mentioned was ‘Arkane’? Did she mean the planet, or someone unfortunate enough to be named after the planet?

“Don’t look at me like that,” Beck grumbled, her voice quieter than it had been before.

“I… I’m sorry.” Petra said, her own voice strained, “Did you just say, ‘Arkane’?”

“Yes.”

“As in the planet?”

“I said you wouldn’t understand.” TO heard the creak of the bed and assumed that Beck had gotten up.

“No no, wait.” Petra said. “You really do mean Arkane, the planet?”

“Yes.” Beck hissed, “Arkane. *She* is the planet.” There was another stretch of silence before Beck spoke again. “See. You do think I’m crazy.”

“I… I just never met someone before who... you know, really believed in that stuff.”

“‘That stuff’ is very important to me.”

“…Important enough that you’d rather stay here and die?” Petra shot back.

“Like I said, you don’t understand…”

“I… I don’t.” Petra finally said, sighing, “I mean, I’ve heard of Seawack-, I mean, Arkanists.”

“Arkanaeth.” Beck snapped, “And I caught what you almost said.” She scoffed, “I should be glad you nearly used the less offensive term in the beginning.”

“I’m sorry…” she whispered, “I… I only… I didn’t mean.”

“I shouldn’t be surprised.” Beck said, “Most people don’t even know the proper word. Most just hear ‘Seawacks’ or ‘Seafuckers’ and roll with it.”

TO’s ears dropped down. Arkanaeth wasn’t a word they were overly familiar with, but ‘Seafuckers and ‘Seawackers,’ were. People referred to as such were often portrayed in some of the Arkanian shows that they watched, but not in a very positive manner. At best, they were portrayed as these odd, out of touch crazy people who treated the planet like their lover. At worst… Well, TO had watched a show in the early days of their trip to Arkane where one such person convinced a bunch of teenagers to ‘become one with the waters’ by having an orgy on the shoreline of an abandoned island. Once it was all done, and all the teens were asleep, the antagonist went about and quietly drowned each one.

Arkanaeanism, was what it was called; TO remembered that now. It was one of the old religions of Arkane, and the only one to survive with some small following today.

So that’s why she didn’t want to say anything. TO felt their ears pin back as they listened.

“…How did you become one?” Petra finally asked, “I mean, were your parents like that? Or, did you get involved with a cult or-“

“It’s not a cult!” Beck snapped, “And no, I didn’t get involved with anyone, since nobody can talk about religion, right?” She huffed, “honestly, a part of me still thinks you’ll report me to your synth friends, but honestly if it’s getting to the point where I have to choose between dying here, or leaving the planet, then it might be for the best if you do report me! They can kick me out and leave me to die here.”

“We’re not going to kick you out!” Petra insisted.

“Why not? That’s what I want.” After a few long moments of awkward silence, Beck sighed, “And… my parents were Arkanaeths.” She said, “But they didn’t teach me or anything. I didn’t know until they died, and then I found their stuff when I was cleaning up. They kept it all locked up. I don’t know if they were trying to keep me from getting involved with it, or if they were afraid I’d tell someone.”

“Why would they worry about that?”

“…Because If I told one of my teachers when I was younger, or even just talked about it in passing, then at best I’d get taken from them! At worst, they’d probably get sent off to a mining colony.”

“So even though they hid that from you, on purpose, you decided-“

“I found their stuff. I was horrified, like you are, and was planning to throw it away. But stuff just made sense to me as I looked through it. It helped me.” She huffed, “I don’t expect you to understand.”

“Ok… ok, ok, let’s… let’s put that aside for a moment.” She said, “Your parents were…Part of a cult?”

“A belief system.”

“A religion.”

“That Implies organization.” Beck said. “This is a personal thing. There’s no meeting or anything like that.”

This was very different from how it seemed in the shows that TO had seen, where the ‘leaders’ of a cult or religion would go around, secretly recruiting people and giving them mysterious instructions to be in a dark and shady place at a certain time on a certain day.

“Ok. A belief system.” Petra said, “And, because of that, you’re part of it now-“

“No.” Beck said, and even TO could hear the frustration in her voice, the edge of a growl creeping up. “I found their notes and books after they died. I read the notes, and I thought about it myself. Now I believe it now because it makes sense to me. It feels right.”

“And because of that… you refuse to leave the planet, even if you die on it.” There was no response from Beck for the longest time until Petra finally sighed again and said, “Seriously, just tell me. I’m not going to report you to anyone.”

“I’m certain there’s been many people who said the same, only to have their ‘friends’ open up to them.”

“I’m helping the insurgency take care of people that they’ve hidden away from the authorities, and I’m complicit in illegally transporting citizens off planet. Trust me; if I found anyone to report you to, I’d be in a lot more shit than you.”

“…The belief system…” Beck started, her voice uncertain and quiet before trailing off. “Look, I’m not trying to recruit you, or convert you, but you want to know, so-“

“It’s ok, go ahead. Help me understand.”

Beck sighed again. “The belief system views water as the source of all life.” Beck said, “As connected to all life. It has a memory and holds a piece of everything that it touches.”

TO’s ears perked up. They had actually heard about this, but not related specifically to water. Quantum Entanglement was what it was called, and while TO’s understanding of Quantum Mechanics was superficial and basic. They did recall that it had something to do with particles being linked. They only recalled this now because the document they had read used drops of water to provide a basic example.

How Quantum entanglement worked TO couldn’t say, and their interest in it hadn’t been enough to drive them to deeper research, so all they knew was from the briefest of overviews in an article about something else.

“Ok, water has memory.” Petra said. “Go on.”

“Well.. on Arkane, that means that everything that’s touched the water here is connected to that water, right? Everyone who ever lived or died here still ‘lives’ in that water.”

“…Ok.”

“So, I believe that when I die, so long as I’m here, and so long as I’m put in the water, then I’ll be reunited with everyone I’ve ever known and lost.”

“… So, your parents, right?”

“My parents, yes.” She said, “But also… My partner, who died in the water, and my child who died when he was still a toddler.”

TO’s ears dropped, and their hands went to their mouth.

“Oh… Oh Beck.” Petra’s voice was softer now, “I didn’t know you had-“

“I was young.” She said, “Too young to have kids, really. But I loved him, and I loved our baby. When they died, I moved back in with my parents. Then they died-“

“How did they-“

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Right.” Petra said. “… Sorry.”

“… So, yeah.” Beck said, “I believe, maybe stupidly to you, then when I die, so long as I’m on this planet, and especially if my body is put in the water, I’ll see my family again. My parents, my partner… and my child.”

TO took a slow breath and moved away from their hiding spot, making sure to keep out of sight. They didn’t know that they could stay in hearing range for much longer without making some sound, or without saying something, and they weren’t ready to talk to Beck just yet.

======

TO had always thought it was insanity for someone, anyone, to prefer death to breaking one of the aspects of a seemingly arbitrary belief system. Yes, King Decon had banned organized religion in the early days of his reign, but people were still free to practice whatever they wanted on their own. They just couldn’t impose that on anyone else.

Though, judging by how scared Beck was, TO guess that the government of Arkane had taken that rule and twisted it someway for some purpose, as they had many other things. They’d ask someone about it later on, maybe once they were on the ship and off the planet. In the meantime, despite the confounding conclusions taken from a single scientific theory, TO’s stomach churned at the thought of taking Beck from her only hope of seeing the people she loved once more. They didn’t believe it was possible, but they did believe that Beck’s hope was real. There had to be some solution, something they could do to help.

Maybe they could disprove the theory, show her some science that would convince her that it didn’t matter if she died on Arkane or not. No, that wouldn’t work. TO didn’t think they could stand breaking her heart in that way, and killing that little spark of hope.

Well, there had to be a solution, and they didn’t have much time to find it.

They considered the problem idly as they made their way to their next task. Down the hallway and past their own room, they approached one of the other rooms that the insurgency had designed to hold potentially dangerous people inside. Noss was there, apparently, and it really seemed like they were going to bring him along. TO didn’t like that idea, but felt that while the others had left Kei’s fate up to the Chilacians, Noss’ would be left to Arkanian citizens. If that was what they choose, TO would go along with it. That didn’t mean they wouldn’t take the proper precautions.

They approached the metal door and had almost unlocked it before they paused. Certainly, if Noss tried something, then TO would be able to handle them, right? He was a third of TO’s size, had no combat training, and didn’t move particularly gracefully.He wouldn’t be stupid enough to try anything, right?

TO leaned forward and listened at the door. It was thick and solid, and someone with average hearing wouldn’t be able to hear much without opening the little slot on the bottom, but TO’s hearing allowed them to hear some noises through the door. From the Cadence of the sound, TO was fairly certain that Noss was speaking to someone… But who? Was he talking to himself? Being kept in solitary wasn’t good for any species, but could it drive someone like Noss to insanity in such a short time?

Suddenly, they heard another voice; one familiar but with a cadence they couldn’t place. Who was in there with Noss?

Their mind flashed back to their time in the indebeted Center, to their escape and to Outis who had escaped whatever fate Leanaran had for them. The squid-like creature was so small, so sneaky, and seemed able to get through tiny little cracks almost anywhere! Could they have made their way here? Were they conspiring with Noss?

With narrowed eyed and pinned back ears, TO unhooked the latch and threw the door open.


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