Synth

It only took about twenty minutes for the drugs to kick in. The pain TO felt in their head and stomach turned cold, the throbbing, fiery pain replaced with ice and numbness. It was such an odd sensation, and one that allowed them to feel their pain more thoroughly, as an acute cold mass in their head, its icy tendrils creeping down the back of their neck and back. Oddly, they could also feel other lesser cold spots on their shoulder and in their wings, a reminder of pain that they ignored over time.

It would be worrisome if it weren’t for how comfortable they were. The drugs really were good, creating a slippery surface in their mind where thoughts couldn’t take hold. All they could really do was rest and listen to the musicals playing as they drifted in a daze of painkillers. Occasionally, someone came in to check on them. Sometimes it was DH. Sometimes, it was Avery, who sat by TO for a little longer to talk to them. TO wouldn’t be able to tell what they were saying; words that Avery spoke a minute ago drifted from TO’s head and got lost in the fog of their mind.

Still, at one point, TO reached out and took Avery’s hand. They had no recollection what Avery had said to trigger their reaction, but they squeezed Avery’s hand tightly.

“You’re too good.” They said, “Kei doesn’t deserve you. Kei doesn’t deserve to have you as an Ankrya.”

As TO said that, Avery just held TO’s hand tightly, their ears lowering, their hand shaking.

“I’m worried about you.” TO said, “That.. shatter-sickness stuff.”

They couldn’t remember what Avery said to that, as their mind once more got lost in the fog.

They passed the rest of the day in that fog, with a vague awareness of people coming and going. At one point, DH and Avery came to their room and curled up on either side of TO as they both fell into deep, exhausted sleeps. If it weren't for that, TO might not have realized how late it was in the day.

TO, of course, didn’t need to sleep. They felt like they had been drifting in and out of sleep the whole day, and just continued that though the night. Because of this, they heard DH chirping and mumbling through the night, and occasionally when their chirping stopped suddenly, TO could see their ears pin back in anger, a response to some dream they were having.

Avery, TO realized, was a much more restless sleeper than they previously realized. They tossed and turned, occasionally clutching at TO, occasionally shivering as they slept, their ears were low as and they whimpered frequently.

Was that an effect of ‘shatter sickness’ or had TO just never noticed how Avery slept before? It’s not like Avery slept with TO and DH often, so it was hard to tell.

As time passed, their thoughts slowly reformed and within a few more hours they could think properly again. Of course, that mostly meant they could worry about DH and Avery as they slept fitfully on either side of them.

Their family. TO’s mate to one side, and their Ankyra on the next.

There was only one more day to prepare. One more day, to make sure everything was ready, and then they had to leave with their little family.

One more day. They’d either make it together, or they wouldn’t.

======

Although TO felt fine when DH and Avery finally woke up, DH insisted they stay in bed and rest while they and Avery went to fetch some breakfast for the three of them.

“I’m fine.” TO insisted as they got up, but a withering stare from DH made them slink back into bed. “I really am fine.” They muttered as they pulled the covers back up over their lap, “I didn’t break my neck, I bumped my head. I didn’t even feel it.”

Once TO was back in bed, DH’s expression lightened. Their ears were still low, but they were smiling at least.

“Yes, you’re very lucky!” DH said, “If you had fallen wrong, you might have hurt yourself worse, or you might have broken your neck. What if you had fallen into the bars of Kei’s cell? If that happened, then you’d have hurt yourself worse and Kei would have been able to grab you!”

“But none of that happened.” TO said.

“I’m aware! I saw the video footage!” DH said, “You were very lucky! So, I don’t want to tempt luck any more than we already have. You’re going to lie in bed, and when we come back, you’re going to eat a full breakfast, take more medication, and then I’ll examine you and see if you’re actually ok.”

DH went up to TO, arranged a pillow behind them, then kissed them quickly. “Just stay in bed and rest a little more for me.” They whispered before they turned around and rushed off to get breakfast.

“DH was worried about you.” Avery said as a means of explanation. “When they first heard something was wrong, when Mira contacted them, she didn’t say what had happened, she just said you were unconscious and sent her friend to get you. They didn’t know you had fainted. Mira didn’t know either, not until they watched the footage.”

TO’s ears warmed. “Yeah.” They grumbled, “Who wouldn’t faint! Kei bit off a piece of their finger and spat it at me!” they shuddered, “I could hear it.”

“... They’re not really in their right mind.” Avery said, “Goretta said she wanted to run some tests, and-”

“Wait.” TO’s ears pinned back, “Avery… you’re not still defending them, are you?”

“It’s… not really their fault.” Avery said. “King Decon altered their mind first and then everything that happened here was so sudden, you know? They still need help!” Ears tilting down, they glanced at TO. “And… I saw the video, TO.”

“So you saw them spit their fingertip at me!”

“Y-yes…” they said, “But I also saw how scared they were when you went up to them, and how angry you looked.”

“Of course I was angry.” TO said, “They’ve hurt everyone I care about!” They felt their ears pin back further and took a breath to calm themself. “The only people Kei hasn’t hurt yet are Flit and Snout. But they hurt GiDi, they hurt DH… They hurt you, Avery.”

“They just knocked me down-”

“They didn’t just hurt you physically.” TO said. They glanced up at Avery, their eyes flicking over them. After a long period of silence, Avery’s eyes widened, their ears perking up in comprehension.

“Oh. right.” Avery’s ears flicked down, “You’re worried about the shatter sickness.”

“How did you know that?” TO asked, their eyes going wide.

“Well, you told me you were worried. Of course, you told me while you were high on painkillers, so I guess you might have forgotten.” They gave a humorless smirk, “You might have also forgotten that I read that entire file. I know what Shatter-Sickness is.”

TO looked aside, “I didn’t forget.” They said, “I just didn’t think you’d consider that.”

“I’m not as clever as you, TO, but I pay attention.” They said, “I paid attention to that video. I saw how scared Kei looked, and how angry and aggressive you were.” They looked away. “What did you say to them, anyway?”

“... Excuse me?”

“What did you say to them? They looked scared and when you spoke to them, and then they got angry… But then they lunged, that was different. What did you say to them?”

TO fell silent. They could only look at Avery in disbelief for a few minutes. “You’re really going to blame me for how they reacted?” an irritated clicking came from the back of their throat.

Avery’s ears dipped. “I’m not blaming you…” They said, “But you must have said something to make them act that way.”

At that moment, TO wanted to tell Avery every detail of their conversation. They wanted to tell Avery everything that Kei said.

“I will never forgive Avery for convincing me…”

“I had never once given them any sign that I was interested in something as foolish as friendship, or that I saw them as anything other than an ally in King Decon’s service.”

They nearly said the words, nearly told Avery what Kei said… They wanted to tell them so desperately, to let them know Kei wasn’t worth Avery’s concern, to show Avery that TO had a reason to be angry with them, and to protect Avery, so they wouldn’t waste their time, their energy, and their feelings over Kei.

And maybe, so Avery wouldn’t look at TO with such accusation again, with their ears dipped in disappointment.

But what would happen if TO told Avery all that? Wouldn’t that just hurt Avery more? If Avery was already at a risk of that Shatter Sickness, then wouldn’t this make it worse?

“I told them the truth.” TO finally said. They looked away from Avery, their ears down, “Pardon me for telling them the truth more harshly than I should have. As I said, they’ve hurt everyone I care about, so I was angry.”

Avery stared at TO for a moment before responding. “Told them the truth? About what?”

“... About King Decon.” TO said. “That’s when they attacked me. I told them that King Decon stole us and altered us. I told them we didn’t break their mind in their procedure, we restored it.”

With a sigh, Avery turned and headed to the door. They paused and turned around.

“Look… for the record, Kei obviously shouldn’t have done… everything. But they’re unwell right now-”

“Were they unwell when they told GiDi that they were broken? Or, were they unwell when they made sure to separate DH from every single friend they might have made before they found me? What about when they reported DH and I to Ark-1, and tried to get us separated!? Were they unwell then?”

“Yes, because King Decon had altered their mind then, so-”

“That’s what they were like before.” TO said, “And this is what they’re like now…” They lay down, and turned onto their side. They didn’t want to look at Avery, didn’t want to talk about this anymore. They knew if they talked about it much more they’d tell Avery what Kei really said. ”Maybe this is just how they are. The only difference is now they have less emotional control. Now we’re seeing what they’re really like.”

There was a sigh, and Avery started for the door.

“I think you deserve better than Kei.” TO said.

“... And I think you should have been more careful with them.” Avery said.

TO didn’t bother to look up as Avery left the room.

======

When DH returned, TO was happy to see Avery with them. They didn't want to talk to their friend right now, but they were at least glad that Avery had come back, and hadn’t chosen to ignore or avoid TO. Thankfully, it didn’t seem like they’d have to talk to Avery right now, as the two were followed by Snout who was pushing Flit along in a wheelchair, and Goretta.

“Flit?” TO sat up, “Are you ok, what-”

Flit’s ears pinned back and flushed blue. “I’m fine.” They hissed. “I could walk on my own just fine, but-”

“But you need to let the wounds on your leg heal.” Snout said. “And you wanted to come here, so… we compromised with a wheelchair. You’re lucky we found one we could borrow.”

Flit grumbled for a moment more, but TO caught Snout slowly scratching the back of Flit’s neck, and the older Chilacian seemed to calm down.

“For the record.” Goretta said, “I’m not offering my opinion on anything here. I’m just here to state medical facts, and I’ll hang around if you have questions, but aside from that I am not getting involved with decision making.”

“Decision making?” TO asked.

Snout gave a solemn nod, “Yes, decision making.” They said, “GiDi’s not able to decide about anything at this time. So, we need to make a decision.” They shook their head, “We won’t have time for a big discussion tomorrow, so we’ll have to just tell GiDi what we’ve decided.”

TO closed their eyes, their ears pinning back, “Right.” They said, “I assume then that our decision is regarding what we do about Kei.”

“Exactly.” Flit said. “We need to decide what to do.”