Sweet Shot

#25

Tae-rim woke up late in the morning.

He lazily opened his eyes and looked at the empty space beside him in bed. Clicking his tongue at the vacant spot, he felt both annoyed and amused by how typical it was of Song Ha-min to disappear before he woke up. As he languidly sat up and rotated his stiff neck and shoulders, the muscles around his protruding shoulder blades twitched.

Tae-rim’s plan to shower together the next morning was ruined, as they had fallen asleep covered in bodily fluids. Feeling a bit disappointed, he got up. As he left the bedroom and entered the living room, the aroma of savory food filled the air.

“Oh? When did you come in?” Tae-in, who was eating a meal prepared by their housekeeper, looked at Tae-rim with surprised eyes. An array of elaborate side dishes was laid out, quite lavish for breakfast.

Tae-rim walked slowly to the refrigerator, took out a cold water bottle, and gulped it down.

“Where’s Ha-min?” he asked, placing the half-empty water bottle carelessly on the table.

“Why are you looking for Ha-min first thing in the morning?” Tae-in chuckled, finding it quite amusing.

Tae-rim slowly turned his head, casually scanning the house.

“Did he leave?”

“Yeah. He left even before I woke up. He should’ve at least eaten breakfast before going. That cold-hearted bastard,” Tae-in grumbled, poking at the side dishes.

“Song Ha-min has changed. He used to hang out with us all the time. Now he talks less and contacts us less,” Tae-in muttered, sounding disappointed.

“You said you met him again recently?” Tae-rim asked in a monotone voice.

“Didn’t I tell you? He started contacting us less since high school, and after graduation, he went completely off the grid for a few years.”

“You weren’t in constant contact?”

“No. He really disappeared. I was worried and even went to his house, but he wasn’t there, and his mother wouldn’t tell me anything.”

“…”

“Well, I was also busy with surgeries and stuff, so I couldn’t contact him much either… But when I saw him again, he had lost a lot of weight and became less talkative. I didn’t say it to his face, but he had changed a lot.”

Tae-in rambled on, picking at his rice with a bitter expression. The Ha-min he met again kept a strange distance from Tae-in. It definitely didn’t feel the same as before. Although Ha-min might not think so himself, Tae-in could clearly sense it. He only guessed that there were things Ha-min didn’t want to talk about, but deliberately didn’t ask about it in front of him. He could only vaguely sense that something must have happened.

Tae-rim silently agreed with Tae-in’s observation about Ha-min’s change. Who could have imagined that the kid who used to leave chocolates and candies in front of his room would now be begging him for kisses? Moreover, he had lost so much weight that there wasn’t an ounce of fat on his belly. While his buttocks and thighs had a decent amount of softness, other parts of his body seemed frail, as if they would bruise easily if touched too hard. Tae-rim wondered if he should chase after Ha-min and feed him…

“By the way, weren’t you supposed to stay at Hee-jae noona’s place?” Tae-in asked curiously as he continued eating. He seemed surprised that his brother, who he thought wouldn’t come home, had returned.

“She went to America, for fun,” Tae-rim replied.

“Again? With whom?”

“Some friends or siblings… or something.”

Tae-rim answered vaguely with a hazy expression.

“Wow, that noona really lives the YOLO life,” Tae-in remarked.

“Well, her family home is in America.”

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Didn’t you say you’d go back to America after fulfilling the minimum attendance requirement?”

“Ah.” Tae-rim sighed softly. His face showed he had forgotten about it, but he remained indifferent. Tae-in clicked his tongue and shook his head, saying he had expected as much.

“That was the plan.”

“You came back temporarily because father collapsed, right? You said you’d just finish your last semester and go back.”

“If they tell me to go, I’ll go.”

Tae-rim replied nonchalantly and pulled out his phone from the pocket of his hastily worn sweatpants. It didn’t matter to Tae-rim whether he was in Korea or America. Since childhood, because Tae-in had poor health, all their parents’ expectations were directed solely at Tae-rim. Their father’s company, which inherited their grandfather’s business, was a financial firm operating between Korea and America. Tae-rim’s father had sent him to study in America from a young age, hoping that Tae-rim would fully take charge of the American branch.

However, this year, Tae-rim’s father suddenly collapsed due to a chronic illness, causing Tae-rim to return from America before completing his graduation. With only a short time left until graduation, he had transferred to his current school through an exchange program and was just going through the motions in his final semester. After all, there was nothing money couldn’t solve.

Additionally, he was spending time visiting his father’s company and taking some management classes. Lee Tae-rim didn’t care much about how things unfolded, as he had no choice in his own future. He lived life casually, like flowing water, without much interest. He had never lived desperately even once. His world turned well enough on its own and rolled along peacefully without him having to try.

Tae-rim checked his phone with a bored look. There were dozens of messages, but he scrolled past them without reading. Among them, there were no messages from Ha-min. He had left without even leaving a message. Tae-rim had planned to help him shower, treat him to something delicious, and take him for a drive, thinking he must have had a hard time yesterday. Thanks to him, he had slept well. As Tae-rim was staring at Ha-min’s contact information…

“But if you leave again, Song Ha-min will cry,” Tae-in said suddenly.

Tae-rim’s expressionless gaze sharpened at Tae-in’s unexpected words.

“…”

Tae-rim looked at Tae-in as if asking what he meant. Faced with the suddenly focused attention, Tae-in added casually,

“You know how much he follows you around.”

“…”

“It’s so obvious even when he tries to hide it. Yesterday too, as soon as he arrived, he was looking for you first.”

“Like a pair,” Tae-in muttered, as if finding it absurd.

A smooth smile appeared on Tae-rim’s face at Tae-in’s response.

“Then should I not go?”

Tae-rim suddenly chuckled, mumbling as if talking to himself. “What?” Tae-in’s eyes widened in a somewhat shocked expression.

“I don’t want to make him cry.”

Tae-in scrunched up his face with all his might at Tae-rim, who was smiling so smoothly it was ridiculous to anyone watching. What’s wrong with him, so annoying.

By the time midterms were ending, the weather had become perfectly spring-like.

Ha-min had lived in the library throughout the midterms. He would pull all-nighters, then return to his gosiwon room for a brief nap, repeating this pattern for several days. It wasn’t difficult. In fact, he almost welcomed the exam schedule.

Since that day, Ha-min had tried his best to keep busy. He would work part-time jobs until dawn while still memorizing his textbooks. He rarely checked his phone and only moved between fixed routes: classroom, library study room, gosiwon room, and convenience store. While the approaching midterms were one reason, he also wanted to minimize his thoughts. Whenever his mind wandered, all he could think about was that time.

His face would flush and his lower abdomen would feel heavy as he kept remembering himself moaning in that room filled with his scent, and the hyung looking down at him with passionate eyes as he moved. Like a pubescent student first awakening to sexual desire, his body reacted frequently. Just thinking about it made the inside of his thighs feel hot. Next came the shame. He still couldn’t understand what he had been thinking at the time. But on the other hand, he felt that he would have regretted it if he hadn’t done it.

“Hey, Song Ha-min.”

It was just as Ha-min was leaving the college building with a light expression after finally finishing his last exam. A heated voice called out to him from behind, seemingly determined.

“…!”

Before Ha-min could turn around, an unfamiliar hand grabbed his shoulder.

“Fuck, are you crazy?”

As his body was forcibly turned, he saw Cha Jun-seong’s face, full of tension. It was a face flushed with anger. Sensing the malice in his face, Ha-min unconsciously took a step back.

“What…”

“…You removed my name?”

“Ah… that…”

“Are you insane? I handed over all the research materials, and you remove my name? Aren’t you completely crazy?”

His face was not just angry, but poisonous, as if he had seen the completed PowerPoint presentation. Ha-min, shrinking involuntarily, pressed his fingertips hard with his nails. His heart started pounding reflexively, and cold sweat broke out. Ah, this isn’t good.

Ha-min tried to calm his accelerating breath and spoke calmly.

“…I clearly sent a KakaoTalk message saying the materials were insufficient…”

“Are you kidding me? So you remove my name? Fuck, are you going to take responsibility if you ruin my GPA?”

“Even when I suggested meeting remotely to organize… you ghosted me…”

Ha-min squeezed out his voice as much as possible, avoiding the glaring gaze. His throat felt rough. Just seeing that face full of malice automatically brought back old memories. As if it were happening now, he felt short of breath and his heart pounded heavily, recalling those long times when that face had hurled insults, inflicted violence, and mocked him. Like a trauma.

Although his voice was broken and lacking confidence, he was saying everything he needed to say with all his might. On the other side, a snicker of disbelief was heard.

“Hey.”

He didn’t even call him ‘hyung’ anymore. Cha Jun-seong, gritting his teeth, pressed down hard on Ha-min’s shoulder.

“I told you I was sick that day. Fuck, what was I supposed to do when I was sick?”

“…”

“You act so nice, but I guess that’s not really you? And Ha-min.”

A mocking call was heard. Ha-min bit his lower lip hard.

“Everyone lives like that, more or less.”

“…”

“Just because others are sucking up to you now that you’ve improved a bit, you think you’re something special?”

“…”

“Why did you crawl back to school after being a loser in the army?”

“…”

“It’s disgusting how you’re cozying up to everyone just because your face got a bit better.”