Chapter 99
Tibs ignored the dungeon's whimpering as he tightened his hold on the core, or the way its voice changed, once it was out of the cradle. He focused on it, on the essence in it.
"Please."
Would he have to break the core to be able to pull the essence out? He tightened his grip more, thought he felt the stress spread, even if he couldn't sense most of the core itself.
"Please, stop."
I didn't deserve to be listened to after all the people it had carelessly killed. He took hold of the essence within it, and drew it to him, only for the crystalline surface to resist.
"Please don't crack me."
Tibs didn't care what it wanted. The people it killed would be avenged.
"I don't want to end…. To die."
He paused, and the faintness of its voice registered. It no longer came from around him, but from the core directly. It sounded more than weak. It sounded young.
That was no excuse for what it had done. And it wasn't like it would mean whatever it promised.
Still…
"Give me one reason why I shouldn't crack you open and drink you up." He realized the implication as he said the words. Told himself he wasn't like it. He hadn't set out to kill the dungeon. He had offered it chance after chance to work with him.
He wasn't the same. He wasn't a murderer…. This time.
The core was wonderful, he realized. How the colors flowed together without mixing. It reminded him of how his reserve felt like when he channeled two elements. Was this what it would look like if he could channel all of them?
It was small. Smaller than it had looked in the cradle. Smaller than he remembered Sto's being. Sto had filled his palm, while this one covered no more than half of it. Did cores grow as they aged? As they gained more essence? Or were they simply different the way people were different?
"I'll…" it finally said, only to trail off. "I can…" it tried. "I'm…." Its whimpering grew desperate. "I don't know! I don't know what I can do, say. I don't know…." The whimpering grew faint. "I don't want to end. But I don't know what to say. I just don't know…."
That was evidence he was justified, Tibs told himself, but he couldn't tighten his grip, couldn't focus on pulling the essences through the surprisingly hard crystal. He could make himself stronger. The dungeon couldn't keep him from pulling Earth to him anymore.
Who had it been? Alistair, maybe? 'Being willing to admit you don't know is a good place to start changing.' It sounded like something his old teacher would have said.
Did that make the dungeon's admission better than a reason? Did the dungeon know that would make him hesitate, make him question what Tibs was doing?
He tried to convince himself that was the reason. A trick to gain clemency.
But how could it know? Even with Mind, it wouldn't know how to pull information from him. Dungeon learned how to use essences first from watching Runners use it, and the knowledge they absorbed from those who failed the tests.
He was its first Runner, so it couldn't know how to use that element. Couldn't know how close to his own guilt the admission would be.
Didn't that have to mean the admission was honest?
If that was a good place to start changing, could he still kill it and say he was administering justice?
It had gleefully killed people. Been arrogant about not needing, not wanting to change. But was that all it was?
Wasn't that what he'd thought of Don? Before getting to know him? Learning what the sorcerer had lived through. How it had shaped him.
Did the dungeon deserve the chance to show it could change?
Didn't Tibs?
When was the last time he'd admitted his crimes to himself? All the people he'd killed when he carelessly unleashed his anger? Wasn't he always trying to change, to be better?
The dungeon had attacked the copper-haired woman with an etching so powerful it had hurt itself.
Just like Tibs had when he let fire loose.
He'd been given chances to change. Had given himself those chances.
"Alright."
"W…." Surprise gave its voice a fearful edge. "What?" Or maybe it was just scared of what it might mean.
"You get a second chance."
"I…do?" The silence stretched as Tibs turned. "But…. I didn't give you a reason. I don't…."
"I know."
"But…. You said…."
Tibs crossed the room's exit.
"Wait! My cradle's in the other direction." Now its fear was clear.
"Don't worry. I'm not killing you. But you don't get to go back in there right now. I don't trust you to learn if you have access to all the of this." He waited for its response as he walked. This would be the first test. Maybe the only one, if he didn't like its reply.
"I…."
He waited. He needed the response to be without prompting.
It came tentatively. "It's all still there for me."
"Really?" He didn't bother with surprise; it had been the answer he'd hoped for. But was it enough? "Why tell me? Why not have a creature attack so they can free you? Have it take you back to your cradle?"
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"I…. I don't know. I know that if they can't crack you open—"
"Kill me. That's what would happen. Just like what you were afraid I'd do to you. Call it what it is."
"I'm still afraid you're going to do that."
"I might. In some places, what you did is considered irredeemable. I'm waiting to see if you'll give me a reason."
"If they didn't kill you, that would be a reason. You wouldn't just take me from my cradle this time. You'd crush me. Kill me."
"So. The only reason you told me is because you're afraid I would have killed you if you tried and failed?"
"I…. I think so? But…. I don't know." They sounded exasperated. "I don't know why I told you. I'm scared, and I don't want you angrier. And I thought I should…." They sounded even smaller. "I just don't know."
"Okay." Admitting you didn't know was a good place to start changing.
"Okay?" The surprise was filled with exasperation. "What do you mean, okay? I didn't answer you."
"You did."
The silence stretched. "I don't understand."
He chuckled. "That's a sensation you want to get used to. There is a lot out in the world you aren't going to understand."
"But I know everything it knows. I learned all that when I dran…. When I killed them."
"Your helper didn't know everything. They would have done their best, but they would have made mistakes."
"Would they have kept me from…."
"I don't know. They would have tried. They would have told you the rules. But you learned them through absorbing what they knew. Helpers can't force you to do what they say. Just threaten you with a visit from the Them."
"I don't think they're real," it said after a stretched silence. "What they know of the things it thought of as them was just things they'd heard. Had been told. They'd never seen one."
"Oh, they're real. I fought one." He stopped before the 'room' with the missing floor.
"What are they like?"
He considered his answer. "Like me, but so much more worse."
"Are you…."
Tibs laughed. "No. I'm not a Them. They would have had an easier time with you than I did. They can take control of your creatures from you." He paused. "You wouldn't have been able to convince them not to kill you. Once they decide you broke too many rules, they can't be stopped."
He crouched. "Alright. Since you can still control this, remake the floor."
The silence stretched, and Tibs readied himself.
"Will you take me back to my cradle after that?"
A question was better than an ultimatum.
"No. Nothing I have you do will lead to taking you back there. This is because I don't feel like making the etching that would let me jump over it. You made it, you fix it. Think of it as a lesson. You are responsible for what you do. If you make a mistake, you have to be the one to fix it."
"And this was a mistake?"
"Not necessarily," he admitted. "But you did it, so you need to undo it."
Essence shifted within the walls, moving down along them. Mainly Earth, but Air, Water, and others.
"How do I know when I make a mistake?" They sounded stained. "This is harder than before."
"Sometimes, it's as obvious as being ripped out of your cradle. Others, it might be years before you realize it. Some people never do. Or never admit to it, at least."
The floor stretched unevenly from the walls, like a water puddle stretching as more water was added. Even now, the essence was thinner than what he thought of as dungeon made. Much more like normal stone. When it covered the hole, it was thick enough it could support more than his weight. It also lacked flaws that might hint at a trap.
"So I might not know?"
He crossed the new stone, remaining alert for changes. He couldn't sense the dungeon's will until it did something. "Did you know you were making a mistake before I pulled you from your cradle?" Its compliance made Tibs uneasy. Reminding himself it wasn't a person the way he was, only offered a little reassurance. It had been quite pleased with doing whatever it wanted before.
The dungeon hadn't answered by the time he reached the other side. Was it trying to work out if doing something it knew was against the rules was wrong? Was it looking for ways to justify its decisions?
How many people had he met who did that? How often had he done it? It wasn't always easy to be honest with himself, even with light as one of his elements.
"I didn't care," it finally said.
"So you knew. I'm just the incentive you can't ignore."
"Yes."
Sunlight became visible, then he stepped to it, then he was outside, soaking in the heat. He hadn't realized how cooler the dungeon was. "Do you feel the heat?"
"I sense the essences. There's mostly Air, and Light. Not really any Fire."
"Heat isn't limited to Fire. It's part of how essences interact." He raised his face to the sun. "No one really understands why, but some will cause what I feel as heat on my skin, the coolness of the breeze."
"Okay."
He chuckled at the lack of interest.
He saw her in the distance, a body on the grass, but didn't rush. What was the point? There was no essence in her anymore.
"What are you doing?" it asked, sounding worried.
"Going to see the woman you…. That we killed." Maybe his blast hadn't played a part in her death, but she'd been here because of him. How she'd tracked him all the way he couldn't imagine, but regardless, he'd played a part in this.
"You can't."
"This is another lesson. Facing what you did."
"Stop. Please. You can't take me there."
"You don't get to avoid this," he replied, tone hard. "We are going to take her, build her a pyre, and send her back to the elements." Maybe there would be something on her that about her family. Maybe he could bring them news of what had happened to her.
"Stop! You can't take me outside—" it cried out as Tibs stepped from dried ground onto lush grass. Then whimpered. "Please take me back."
He looked at the line. The border of the dungeon's influence.
He hadn't considered that. Thinking it over, he'd expected its influence to be centered to the core. He focused on it, and it was fine. The crystal shell was as solid as before. No essence leaked out.
It would be fine.
He reached the young woman and crouched next to her. So abyss young to be out here, chasing him. To be dead.
"Look at what we did."
He reached under the neck of her armor and pulled out the stone.
The core whimpered.
He hardened his voice. "I said, look at what we—"
"I can't!" it snapped. "I don't see anything! I sense the elements! And I can't sense anything other than you and me. There is nothing! Take me back!"
Something else he hadn't considered.
"Please," it begged softly. "I'll be good. I promise. I'll only have creatures that can hurt those who come in. I'll make traps for them to beat. And I'll wait for them to come. I won't send out creatures. I'll wait however long it takes for them to find me. Please take me back."
He swallowed the lump.
He remembered how lost he'd been, away from everything he'd known. Not knowing what to expect from this world he'd been sold into. Of then leaving home and his family behind and facing a new world, this time of his own volition.
Gently, he took the chain off her and held the green stone.
He didn't like how it felt. Even this weak, it would disrupt any etching he tried to make. How could something like this come to be? The elements made up everything, had to be part of this, so how could it disrupt their essences?
"Please, I promise I'll—"
"I don't trust you," he said without anger. "You don't know how powerful temptation is. I trust you mean what you're saying, there's no light on the words. But how long can you have nothing and be okay with it when you can so easily make something happen? Once I've shown you more of what's out here, I'll bring you back."
"But there's nothing!"
He pocketed the stone and chain and did his best to ignore how it felt. He should throw it as far as he could, but it could be useful. It affected anyone with an element. He'd work on someway to contain its effect once he'd dealt with the young woman's body.
"There's more than what you sense. I'll figure out a way to show it to you. But right now, I have a pyre to build."
He stood and headed for the treeline. He could probably make the pyre from Wood essence, it would burn just as well, but he wanted something to do while he thought, and that—
The gasp and Life essence appearing out of nowhere made him whirl to face the woman as she sat, hurried to check herself, then looked around, saw him and locked eyes with him.
The tint to her essence registered at the same time as the silver eyes.
"You," she snarled, getting to her feet, and Tibs reflexively pocketed the core. "Are coming with me." She placed a foot down. "You are wanted in…." Her leg folded under her and she fell.
The only motion, once she hit the ground, was her breathing.
He stared at her.
This was going to complicate things.
Tibs story continues in "Mind Your Step."