Stars Dancing [Dreams-To-Lovers Romance]

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PEYDRAN

Ryst,

I'm going to try writing you a letter like you did when we were trying to find Nayth. You wrote him letters, and eventually you found him. So, I'm going to try writing, and maybe it will help me find you.

Ren says you're "there, not here." He says you went "home." He keeps playing the oboe and says you can hear him. He keeps singing to me, "I heard you on the breeze, just like always. I feel how near you are. You are all love and all things. I'll hear you for all eternity. We'll sing together for always."

Ren tells me to listen to the breeze, and I'll hear your voice.

My love, my heart, he is lost in songs, and I know that his lyrics have meanings that are more than what they seem on the surface, but I don't always know how to interpret him. He says he hears you singing. I don't remember you singing much. Nayth was always the one singing. Singing with Ren.

You danced, of course, until you couldn't anymore. So, you're singing now, Ryst?

Five months you've been gone. "There" instead of "here."

Dwin and Euri are just as confident as Ren. They know you're okay. They say you're happy. Euri says sometimes he hears Uncle Nayth laughing. Dwin still dreams that you are a unicorn. One night he dreamt that you were a unicorn singing the unicorn song he wrote when he was ten, and he sang it all day for three days hoping to hear your voice on the wind. Euri threatened to punch him in the face if he didn't shut up.

Is Nayth with you? Ren says he is. What sense does any of this make? I'm trying, trying to understand. I'm supposed to be a mystical Tindin Blacker, but I just feel like a programmer surrounded by magical people who understand things I cannot.

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I miss Nayth. Did he tell you how we used to talk? Could he keep it from you? I'd like to talk to him now. He always understood about Ren because he knew what it was like when you got lost in your tangles and Ren got lost in songs—

Wait, what was that? I felt something. Did I feel something?

A happiness— like when I was in the hospital and Ryst held me when I fell apart. It faded.

"Don't go!" The feeling? The happy— it was there! It was excited! "Ryst?" I asked.

No, I felt it say. It encouraged me, laughing at me. Nudging me.

You can do it, I felt it say.

"NAAAAAYTH? Nayth Carmidee! You bastard!"

We laughed and laughed. It was like when I was in the hospital, but Nayth. Not Ryst. It felt like Nayth. In my mind, or in my stomach?

How do I feel you, Nayth? Is this weird?

And he just laughed. Laughed so hard.

We've been trying.

I felt him focus. He tried to tell me something. He wanted me to know. We've been trying.

Trying? Trying what? I asked.

This.

This? I asked again. Then I understood. Oh! You've been trying to reach us?

Yes, I felt from him. He was excited. Finally! It's working.

How are you doing this, Nayth?

Shoulder shrug. He didn't know.

Is Ryst there? I asked.

He was just happy and content.

Where else would she be?

Where is "there," Nayth? I pushed with all my will.

He withdrew, cautious. Careful. It could fade.

Okay, I wouldn't ask where. What could I ask?

Are you well, Nayth?

Happiness. Everything was happiness.

We've been trying. We see you. We hear you. Ryst knows.

Nayth, what does Ryst know? What do you mean?

Everything. He tried to impress something on me, but I couldn't make it out. He shook it off. That's too much. You can't understand the everything, Peydran. It's too much for you.

Do you hear us talking about you—me and Ren?

Yes, and more. Everything. Ask more questions like that.

I felt a little sick. Wait, you hear everything?

He chuckled wryly. We don't watch everything. We just — know. Connected. Want to remember you. Be connected. Understand?

I sort of did. I connected too. To Ren, in my belly button. And sometimes the boys connected to me. It was easier for them with Ren. But I wanted to connect to my magical husband and our magical children, so I stayed open and listened.

If I really tried, I'd connect to them. A sort of being open, then trying, then letting go and listening for something in response.

Nayth was eager. Yes, yes, they knew. He thought that was it. It was up to us. We had to choose.

My family, Nayth? We can choose to connect to you?

I think so. We are trying. We love you. We love you. We love you, Peydran.

And I got a sense of someone— a tinkling laugh just to the side of Nayth, and they were gone.

Oh sands! Oh stars! They're there. And love and joy and relief poured out of my eyes and down my cheeks.

"Honey! Honey!" I shouted up the steps. "Honey! They're there! And they're here too! They're here, Ren! They can hear us!" I heard a violin coming towards the steps and a face peered down at me.

"Told you so, Pey'o."