Chapter 170: I Don't Need An Arm Anymore!
Mika stepped into the quiet room, the heavy click of the door shutting behind him echoing louder than it should have. Anya trailed right behind, her head lowered, her face pale.
For a long moment, Mika simply stood there, his back to her, his hand on the doorknob, as his mind was a whirlwind of thoughts
'So...What am I supposed to do now?'
Charlotte and the others probably thought he'd already decided, that he was going to punish Anya harshly, cut her down with judgment.
But in truth, Mika felt more confused than anything.
Yes, he had looked frightening when he'd called her in, but that was only because he himself didn't know what to do.
His brows furrowed as he turned slightly, his face caught between frustration and pity.
Anya had spoken cruelly in the heat of anger, but...she hadn't broken the rules. Not really. He knew Anya. There was no way in hell she would ever touch Maria, no matter how furious she was.
She knew better than that.
Her words had been a burst of rage, a vent for her frustration and he understood why. She had been trying to protect him all this time, serving as his guardian in school, and in her eyes, she had failed him.
And now she was flailing, lashing out with words she didn't mean.
'It was a mistake.' He thought. 'A bad one, yes...but just words.'
Yet he also knew he couldn't just excuse it.
If he let it go, what would stop someone else from stepping further in the future? That's why he had pulled her into the room.
'I'll figure out a solution.' He had told himself as he closed the door.
But now, standing in the silence, he felt utterly lost.
He wanted to punish her, but not too harshly.
He wanted to warn her, but not break her spirit.
And the truth was...it had been years since he had to punish any of them. They had been so obedient for so long. He didn't even know where to start anymore.
He ran a hand through his hair with a sigh.
'What do I even say? What do I even do—'
Slash!
Pachuk!
That was when he heard it.
A sound, sharp, slicing, wet. Like a butcher's blade through raw meat.
It was followed by a heavy thud.
And then suddenly splash of red caught his vision.
Mika froze.
What the hell was that?
The only one behind him was Anya, which was even more scary to think about since he most definitely saw blood spash at the edge of his eyes.
So, slowly, cautiously, he turned—only for his eyes to widen in disbelief the moment he saw the scene in front of him.
"A-Anya...what—what are you—" His voice caught in his throat as the sight was too horrifying for him to even speak.
In front of him Anya stood. But her right arm...it was was gone.
Completely severed, now lying on the floor in a pool of blood. The flesh was ragged, the bone exposed, and the smell of iron filled the room.
And in her right hand...she still held the weapon. A blade of bone, grown from her own body, slick with her blood.
Seeing this, Mika's entire body went cold.
"ANYA—WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!"
He rushed forward, grabbing her by the shoulders, his voice breaking with horror.
"WHY THE HELL DID YOU, WHY DID YOU CUT YOUR OWN ARM OFF?!"
But Anya only looked at him with an anguished smile. A pitiful, trembling smile as she uttered,
"It's what I deserve, Mika...what I deserve for what I've done."
"WHAT YOU DESERVE?!"
Mika practically roared. He snatched up her severed arm, pressing it against the bloody stump, trying to force it to reconnect, as if sheer will could make it heal.
"You're insane, you know that! You—you actually cut off your own arm! Are you out of your mind?!"
But once again Anya didn't react much, other then softly saying in a pitiful manner.
"Sorry, Mika. I know you don't like to see me like this. But...But I was so scared...so scared of what you would do to me. I didn't want to see you look at me with that gaze again. I'd rather lose my arms...my legs...everything. This way, at least, I punish myself before you push me away forever."
Mika's chest tightened, his fury colliding with helplessness.
"You—dammit, Anya, listen to yourself! This, this isn't punishment, this is madness!" He shoved the arm against her stump again, blood smearing across his hands. "Attach it back! Right now!"
But Anya only shook her head, tears running down her pale cheeks, her lips twisted into that pitiful smile.
"No, Mika. I don't deserve to have an arm anymore. This is the punishment for my sins. If I live like this, broken, incomplete, then maybe you'll forgive me...Maybe you won't look at me differently again."
But Mika gritted his teeth, his voice dropping low, dangerously low.
"Shut up, Anya! Just shut up and attach it already! The fact that you even did this is more than enough proof of how much you regret what you said. I don't need anything else!"
But she only shook her head stubbornly, her eyes unyielding despite the tears as she said, "No. I'll live like this. I'll live without it. It's better this way."
Mika froze. He knew that look. That stubborn, unmovable resolve. If he tried to talk to her like normal, she would never listen.
'Then I'll have to hit her where it hurts.'
Slowly, he lifted his head, locking eyes with her. His expression shifted, no longer frantic, but calm. Almost mischievous.
"Anya." He said flatly. "You really need to attach your arm right now."
She tilted her head, confused. "…Why?"
"Because if you don't." Mika said, his lips twitching into a sly grin. "Who's going to give me my amazing handjobs in the future?"
Anya blinked, her sadness turning to absurdity. "…Wh-What?"
Mika leaned closer, voice low and teasing as he said,
"Sure, you've still got one hand. But everyone knows a handjob's always better with two." He clicked his tongue mockingly. "So, if you lose one...well, I'll be the one most disappointed in you. And I might just have to look for another girl to give me what I need."
Anya's face went scarlet. "W-What the hell are you saying, Mika?! Y-You—"
He cut her off with a smirk.
"So, if you're fine with me going to someone else...go ahead. Stay like this. But if you actually care, then fix your damn arm. Because I don't want to be stuck with half the service when I know you can do better."
Anya's eyes went wide with panic and she shook her head frantically.
"No! No, no, no! There's no need for that! Don't you dare go to someone else, Mika! I—I'll do it! I'll fix it right now, so don't make any hasty decisions!"
Before he could even react, she snatched the severed arm from his hands, pressed it against her shoulder, and activated her blessing.
Mika watched, his own chest pounding as muscle knit to muscle, tendon to tendon, bone to bone. The flesh reformed itself, veins reconnecting, skin sealing over the seam. In seconds, her arm was whole again, as if she hadn't just mutilated herself before his very eyes.
She flexed her fingers shakily, tears rolling down her cheeks. "See? See, Mika? I'm fine now. Don't, don't go to anyone else. Please."
Seeing that she was finally alright, Mika let out a long, ragged sigh, pressing his palm over his face.
"…Gods above. What am I supposed to do with you people?"
He dropped his hand and stared at her, still pale and trembling.
"You're all completely insane. Ready to jump off swords, mutilate yourselves, throw your lives away, for me. You're walking minefields, every damn one of you."
He shook his head, lips curling into a bitter smile.
"And I'm the poor bastard stuck in the middle, trying not to get blown to pieces."
Mika pinched the bridge of his nose, groaning as he muttered to himself in frustration and relief,
"Surrounded by a bunch of beautiful, psychotic lunatics...and somehow, I'm the one stuck holding it all together."
And at those words, Anya's lips curled into a soft, trembling smile. Her fingers fidgeted restlessly, twisting together as if she were trying to hold back the storm in her chest.
Finally, she spoke, her voice quiet but steady.
"Then...Mika." She asked, almost helplessly. "Does that mean I upset you? That being near me makes you uncomfortable?"
Mika's head lifted sharply at that, startled. But she didn't stop.
"If that's the truth..." Anya continued, her smile still plastered across her face despite the despair flickering in her eyes. "...then I can go away. I can step back, and never stand by your side again."
"If that's what you want...then I'll do it. Even if it hurts me, I'll still do it. Because all I want is your happiness."
She met his gaze then, eyes shimmering like broken glass, and asked softly, pitifully.
"So tell me, Mika...do you want me to go away?"
Her words pierced him like a spear. Mika's throat tightened, and for a moment he could only stare at her, struck by the desperation hidden behind her smile.
Then the realization hit him like a crushing weight.
This isn't just her fault.
Anya's outburst, her threats, even her madness, it wasn't just because she lost control.
It was because of him.
Because for so long he had kept his distance, from her and from the others.
Because he never made it clear, never told them how deeply he actually cared. And so they were left in the dark, vulnerable, restless, doubting themselves.
Anya especially, who carried the burden of protecting him at school, had been left wondering every day where she stood in his heart.
And today, when she thought she had failed him, all those doubts and fears had exploded.
'I pushed her to this...'
He admitted grimly to himself, before deciding he would change all of that and make her realise just much he mattered to her.
Anya lowered her eyes, her voice trembling. "If...if I really do upset you, then I'll leave right now—"
But she never got a chance to finish.
Because Mika suddenly stepped forward, closing the distance between them in one swift motion.
And before she could even react—before she could comprehend what was happening—he grabbed her face and crushed his lips against hers.
Anya's eyes went wide, her whole body freezing.
"Mmm!♡~ Mmm!♡~ Kiss!♡~ Mmm!♡~ Slurp!♡~"
But then the warmth, the passion of it, seeped into her, and she melted. Her hands clutched at his clothes, her knees weakened, her heart thundered like a drum.
The kiss was deep, hungry, overwhelming, so much so that by the time Mika finally pulled back, she was panting, dazed, her tongue slipping out as if searching for more.
"M-Mika…" She breathed, staring at him dreamily. "What...What was that for? Why did you kiss me...out of nowhere like that?"
Mika wiped his lips casually, his expression maddeningly calm as he said,
"You're the one who asked me, remember? Whether I wanted you close, or far away. That kiss..." He leaned in, his eyes boring into hers "...that's my answer."
"After feeling that, do you really think I want you to go away from me?"
Her breath hitched, and slowly, shakily, she shook her head.
"No...that kiss...it was too passionate...There's no way someone who wants me gone would kiss me like that."
"Exactly." Mika nodded firmly. "So listen well, Anya. Sure, you might be a little tapped in the head. You're unpredictable. Even your own mother would agree with that."
His lips twitched into a half-smile.
"But you're also a girl I love dearly. With all my heart. So, to think I'd ever feel uncomfortable around you?...Ridiculous. Throw that thought out of your head this instant."
Hearing this, Anya's eyes went wide, and instantly the pitiful mask shattered.
Her face lit up with a joy so pure it nearly blinded him and she frantically nodded, her hair bouncing as she exclaimed.
"Of course, Mika! Anything you say! Even if you push me away right now, I won't leave, I'll always stay by your side! I could feel just how much you care for me from that kiss alone. So, no matter what happens, I'll never go anywhere, Mika!"
"You're hopeless…" Mika let out a reluctant chuckle, shaking his head.
Then his tone hardened, serious now as he added,
"But that also means no more harming yourself for me. None of that...Got it? And no more insane threats to other people, either. I'm not too strict, you can tease, you can play around...But those kinds of threats?" His eyes narrowed. "Never again."
Anya nodded eagerly, almost like an obedient puppy, her head bobbing so fast her hair whipped around her face. "Yes, Mika! Your word is my order. I won't go beyond that. I promise."
Then, with a curious tilt of her head, she asked softly.
"But...Mika, the reason you kissed me yourself when I'm usually the one begs you for them? Is it because you've started opening up lately? Because you're finally being honest about what you feel and what you want?"
He met her gaze steadily, then nodded once to which Anya's lips trembled, and then she let out a breathless laugh of relief.
"Oh, thank god...I don't know if it was an accident, or a sudden realization, or whatever...but I thank whatever it was. I love this side of you, Mika. I love you for this!"
Mika blinked at her, struck by her words. Then, slowly, he realized just how much he had been holding back all along, and how much those walls of his had hurt them, without him even realizing it.
He was even thinking of apologising—really, truly apologize for holding so much back all this time.
But just as he was about to open his mouth...he blinked.
"...What the—?"
Anya was gone.
Not a trace of her in front of him.
For a split second, his heart skipped. Did she awaken some new ability? Did she vanish into thin air?
He stiffened, his senses sharpened, scanning the room in alarm.
But then he looked down and his whole body jolted.
There she was, kneeling right in front of him, her face dangerously close to his crotch, her expression nothing but utter devotion.
Her bright eyes looked up at him with an almost angelic smile, like a worshipper at the altar of her god.
Mika's brain flatlined. "Anya—?! What the hell, what are you even doing down there?! And when did you even get there?!"
Anya only looked up at him with a dazzling, almost radiant smile, her eyes gleaming with unshakable determination.
"What am I doing?" She repeated, tilting her head innocently. "Isn't it obvious, Mika?"
Her tone was both sweet and maddeningly matter-of-fact as she said,
"Of course I'm going to give you...the handjob you asked for right now."
Mika nearly choked on air. "WHAT?!"
But she just clasped her freshly healed left hand with her right, as if admiring it, and then held it up proudly.
"It was only moments ago that I was about to throw this arm away forever. I was going to live the rest of my life without it. But thanks to you, I got it back. And now...now I can use it to give you something unforgettable."
Her voice dropped into a husky whisper, her smile brightening even more, her devotion almost terrifying in its intensity.
"A life-changing handjob, Mika...That's the least I can do for you."