She’s All that (There Is)

"Hey so, guess what? Dom finally asked me out to the prom!"

"I still don't get what you see in him, but I'm glad you're coming! You really deserve to be prom queen."

"Oh, hush, everyone knows you're a shoe-in. You can act like you don't care all you want, but I know you better than that, Lyssa."

"Besides, it'd make good content. You like, totally need the followers"

"At least people actually like my ig pics, and what are you my fucking tiktok manager now?

"Someone has to be. Like, have you even seen your sporadic upload schedule?"

"Shut up, bitch." I say, throwing a scoop of mashed potatoes at her playfully.

"Gasp! Bitch!"

"Bitch!"

"Like, bitch."

"Bitch?

"Aw, bitch."

"I swear, do you two ever even eat your food?" Hayley asks, chuckling to herself.

"You snort like a pig." Steph says throwing a raisin at her.

"Ack! Oh wait, sorry ladies. That's Dom, he says he wants to meet me outside." Hayley says, checking her phone and getting out of her seat.

"Aw, just as the fun was getting started. He, like, better dick you down good sis."

"Hey, just don't be late to the prom planning committee again tonight, Hayley. Please."

"Don't worry, I'll be there Lyssa. Love you!"

"Love you too!" I sigh.

"What are you, a dyke?"

"Excuse-fucking-me. I don't see your boyfriend."

"Oof, touché."

Sixth period rolls around, and I have to sit through history all alone. Steph has chemistry during 6th, and Hayley is still playing hooky with the meathead. So I'm left without my posse in the one class that Vanessa and I share. She's the only person in school with a following almost as big as mine. Which means she's my main competition for prom queen. Despite what Hayley thinks, I don't actually want the crown for myself. My plan is to give it to Hayley, because she really deserves a memorable night. She's always struggled with the popularity contests. Even though she's super hot, people don't tend to vote for her because she's not starving herself skinny. I can't let Vanessa steal that moment from her. She and I try to keep up appearances that our rivalry is more friendly than it is. She always calls dorky men girl names and makes a ton of racially insensitive remarks. Plus her content is generally just bottom of the barrel stuff. And like, yeah I make fun of loser guys too, but I don't stoop to blatant misogyny. Why would anyone compare guys to girls like it’s a bad thing? Guy is enough of an insult as is in my opinion. They’re all just gross, hairy knuckle draggers who always hit on us girls, and yet they get higher pay than women across the board. Queen bitch must have some sort of sissy humiliation fetish too because of how often she makes fun of guys in skirts on Tiktok. As I'm leaving the class Vanessa is waiting at the door. 

"Hey bestie! Love your nails, you do them yourself?"

"Thanks, love the new hair color. You can barely see your roots!"

"Yeah, just like your eyebags!"

"Oh, I saw you're promoting essential oils on insta now! You go girlboss."

"Can't wait for the prom committee tonight! You think my dress will clash with a crown?"

"Noooo, it's perfect."

For a shotgun wedding.

Vanessa starts an ig reel, as we walk to the art classroom where the planning committee meets.

"Hey Van-fans!" She says, throwing her arm over my shoulder.

Ugh. Van-fans.

"Me and my bestie here are headed to the prom committee! Tonight we decide the theme for the prom. Wish us luck!"

I put on a fake smile and take a pic for my story, where I 'accidentally' covered her face with a peace sign. My outfit, of course, looks way better than hers anyway. Her ASOS chunky yellow cardigan, J Brand Lucy eggshell camisole , and faded gray skinny levis all make for a perfect example of the kind of trash she often wears.  I’m simply sparing my fans from the extra trauma of having to see her face as well. 

Hayley is late to committee again. That boyfriend of hers is a bad influence. He's just into her for her body. I bet he wouldn't stay with her if he knew the things I did. Like that she masturbates to gay man porn and yaoi. I bet he wouldn't stay with her if she got the breast reduction she's talked about wanting. Yet she still stands me up for him. To add insult to injury, Vanessa sits right across the room from me, so I have to see her rush job makeup all night.

"Hey everyone! Glad we are all here. So today we will talk about what catering to choose, and pick the theme for prom. Don't forget folks, it's only a month away."

Ms. Anderson, the theatre professor, announces after everyone settles in.

Immediately, people start making suggestions for the theme. Truly the most important part of today's meeting. A boring prom theme can ruin the whole night, and every girl in the room has dreamed of the night for years.

"Woah, woah, calm down! We are looking at a few catering options and we will take a vote on that later tonight. Obviously people are more excited to talk about the theme though so we'll start with that, haha."

Ms. Anderson was one of the better teachers, but few people signed up for her elective class because only gay people like theatre I guess.

"Vanessa, you're the student council president. What do you think?"

"Thank you Gale. I think, and I'm sure you will all agree, the only logical choice is an under-the-sea theme."

Of course she would.

"Hm, yeah, a classic for sure. Don't you worry though that it's a little too classic? Maybe we should choose something more… original?"

"Oh, yeah a night under the stars is such out of the box thinking Alyssa, thaaank yoouu. How about we hear what other people want though." Vanessa says, as I imagine ripping out her cheap hair extensions and shoving them down her throat.

"Does anyone have any suggestions? one at a time please. Yeah, Claire?"

"What about a masquerade ball?"

A ton of girls suggested other themes, and the night was long but it eventually came down to just those three themes to vote for. Hayley finally showed up, wearing pants and one of Dom's shirts. It is truly a skill how nice she made even guys clothes look. Ms. Anderson said she'd post the results at the end of the week. All I can hope for is that it's not a seafood themed dance.