Self Insert as Spider-Man MCU

Clint stepped out of a side door that had been hidden in shadow and walked over to Natasha.

“Any luck?” Natasha asked as he handed her a small file folder.

“Facial recognition hasn't made a match with any new recruits yet.” Clint said.

“His bag?” Natasha asked and flipped through a couple of pages.

“Standard stuff. Pepper spray, earpiece, two cell phones, radio, his generic business suit, a partially used evidence kit, and a bit of cash mix from the standard monthly expenses package.”

Natasha huffed. “The handcuffs and batons he used are standard, too.”

“He also had the agent's handbook and it looked well read.” Clint said.

“Hmm.” Natasha hummed as she thought it over and read the information. The cell phones were clean, except for two numbers they had yet to trace, one on each. Using the agency phones for different communications was smart. “He could be a plant.”

“Should we set a tail for him?” Clint asked. “It's pretty convenient that he showed up and didn't give his agent number to the guard like rescheduled protocols demand.”

“He might be so new that he doesn't know about that. He also handed his bag over twice and let the guard search them thoroughly.” Natasha said and tapped a line on one of the sheets. “He received the all agents text on his earpiece through one of the cell phones.”

“He missed that early morning meeting.” Clint said as he played devil's advocate.

“He also doesn't have a gun, spare clips, or any of the extra agency IDs that SHIELD usually issues.” Natasha said and closed the folder.

“Do you think he joined and skipped the orientation meeting?” Clint asked.

“It's possible. He could also be playing a game. A very dangerous game.”

“What if he only wants to get close to you and isn't a member of SHIELD at all?”

Natasha gave him a pointed look. “Do you think I would let someone compromise me like that?”

Clint looked down at the messy mats, the torn clothing, and then he looked back at her face and grinned. “No, not at all.”

Natasha couldn't stop her laugh. “Asshole.”

“Did you at least have fun?” Clint asked.

“I...” Natasha looked down at the mess and back at him. “Yes, I did.”

Clint nodded and took out his cell phone. “I'll set a tail for him and we'll see where he goes. I'll send word to the tech department to expand the facial recognition into all agent records. Maybe he knows so much because he's a son or a nephew of another agent.”

“That's a good idea.” Natasha said and waited for confirmation about the tail.

“Damn, they lost him already.” Clint said.

“What? He just left.” Natasha looked at the message. “Ducked into an alley and disappeared? Damn, he's really good to avoid a tail so quickly.”

Clint glanced down at her waist and then chuckled. “No comment.”

Natasha barked a laugh and smacked his arm with her hand. “We've got six hours to prepare for the flight and memorize the mission details.”

“Are you sure you're good to go?” Clint asked and nodded at her outfit.

“Yeah.” Natasha said and handed him the folder back and they both walked over to the partially concealed door. “It surprised me that he would rather walk around in his underwear than let me deal with a torn top.”

“I can't remember if that's chivalry or gallantry.” Clint asked as they entered a small mission planning center with maps, pictures, building layouts, and security system plans. The monitors on the side of the room showed different areas, including the front entrance.

“It's a mix of both.” Natasha said. “Chivalry is the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honor, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help those in trouble. Gallantry is the polite attention and respect given by men to women.”

Clint chuckled and put the folder down on a side table. “I doubt the bastards we're going after are going to be gallant.”

“No, and we won't be chivalrous in return.” Natasha countered and they exchanged knowing smiles.

They were only called in when ass needed to be kicked and names needed to be taken. Since they already had the names, there was only one thing left for them to do.

Kick ass.

*

Thursday morning actually wasn't that bad, even though they were the most boring classes in my schedule, probably because I was in a fantastic mood and I had a huge smile on my face the whole time.

I had made a bunch of breakfast bagel sandwiches and left some for May, dropped some at the main office, which earned me a secret kiss from Mary, and delivered the rest to the teacher's lounge. Not surprisingly, they were shocked and they all enjoyed them, so the teachers were in good moods as well and the classes blew by like a soft breeze.

When I went to lunch in the cafeteria, quite a lot of people greeted me and a few waved. I kind of had my choice of where to sit and then Max waved and caught my eye. To my surprise, she was sitting at the table with Liz, Val and Gina.

I walked right over to Max and sat down across from her. “Hi, Max. Hi, Liz. Hi, Val. Hi, Gina.” I said and nodded to each of them, then I looked back at Max. “I thought you all had club activities during this period.”

“They're done until the new year.” Max said and gave me an odd look. “Aren't you going to ask what the club is?”

“Only if you want me to. Your business is your business.” I said and she looked surprised. “I never asked Liz about what clubs she was a part of and I didn't even know she was the leader of the academic decathlon team until after I quit.” I chuckled. “I've read Peter's journal all the way through and I still can't figure out what he did on the team or what his specialty knowledge category was!”

“It was Biology.” Liz offered. “He loved that lab.”

Her friends turned to look at her, as if asking how she knew that, and she bushed a little at the attention.

“Well, I guess that's solid proof I'm not him anymore.” I said and took out my lunch. “I'm definitely into chemistry and mechanical engineering, with a full side on electronics and a bit of robotics. I really enjoy working with my hands and I worked my butt off to finally catch up in those classes.”

“What did you bring today?” Max asked and leaned closer as I opened my lunch bag.

“I'm not going to ask why you know I bring something different and good every day.”

Max smirked at me. “Word spreads like crazy around here.”

I chuckled and opened up the larger than normal container to reveal six large meat skewers with chunks of vegetables mixed in. The smell of the spicy marinating sauce flowed out and I saw several mouths water on the other side of the table. I didn't say a word and put the container down on the middle of the table. No one moved until I took out a second container.

I laughed as they scrambled and tried to grab a skewer before anyone else. “I attend school with a bunch of vultures!” I parroted Mary's words she had said the first time I brought donuts to the office. I opened the second container and started eating my own skewers.

The four girls finished off the single ones they had and then exchanged looks, because there were only two left. I reached into my container and held out a skewer to Max and to Val, who were sitting on either side of Liz and Gina. They looked grateful and Liz and Gina took the last two in the container. All four of them started eating their second skewers and I could tell that they really enjoyed them.

I quickly ate the rest of mine, before any of them had the bright idea to ask me for another one. I drank my juice and packed everything up, then sat back and listened as the girls started talking again. Max would occasionally glance at me and I would smile, wink, or stick my tongue out at her. The last one had made her clamp her mouth shut to stop her laugh.

I checked my watch and it was getting close to robotics class. “Well, it's been fun.” I said and stood up to sling my backpack onto my shoulders. “See you later.”

“Bye.” “See you.” “Later.” Val, Max, and Gina said, respectively.

I looked at Liz, because she hadn't spoken, and she blushed a little. “It wasn't that awkward, was it?”

Liz opened her mouth to say something, then sighed. “I don't know what to do about it.”

“Do about what?” I asked, a little confused.

“Max really likes you and she doesn't want to hurt me by having you around and I'm hurting her by not committing either way about letting you hang around with us or telling you to stay away.”

I looked at Max and she blushed a little and didn't avert her gaze. “I can give you the simple solution or you can figure it out for yourselves.”

“This I have to hear.” Gina said and Val nodded.

“We all stay friends and I have a not-so-secret affair with Max on the side. You never see anything and she gets to brag about how great having a sex friend is without having to lie about it, because we would all know it's happening anyway.”

The four girls stared at me with surprised faces.

“Anyways, I need to go to class. See you tomorrow.” I said and I walked away without waiting for a response. I was sure they would accept, because who wouldn't want to leave the awkwardness off on the side. I didn't want to split their friendship up, considering they were all seniors and this was their last year at school together. College was going to be a whole different experience for them all.

I went to robotics class and saw most of the club members were already there and they talked excitedly.

“BEN!” They cheered when they saw me and I chuckled.

“I assume the new prototype worked?” I asked and sat down on the teacher's desk.

“Even better than our calculations!” The senior said and handed me a data sheet. “The mock battles only lasted fifteen to thirty seconds against all of our old models!”

I whistled at the numbers he showed me. “I see you added boosters to the air cylinder charger.”

“We had the extra room when we cut out the part of the frame you said we didn't really need.” Another guy said. “It increased the efficiency by twenty percent.”

“You run the risk of seal leakage from excessive use.” I warned him.

“Seals are cheap and we have a dozen air cylinders set up as replacements. It's a cheap trade off for the results it has.” The senior said.

The teacher, Mr. Kinneson came in and saw all the happy faces. “They told you the good news already, the scamps! I wanted to do it!”

We all laughed at his indignation and then we all sat around and talked about the upcoming competition. They were sure they were going to blow right through it, especially because they had enough replacement parts to build another one, from scratch, if the first one was damaged or broken.

When the bell rang, we didn't stop or did anything in the actual class time besides discuss adjustments, program alterations, and working on strategy.

School ended and I visited my locker and dropped off my class things. When I closed it, Max walked over to me and gave me a very pointed look. I closed my locker and neither of us said a word as we left the building and went to the bus stop. I skipped getting on my bus and she didn't say anything. Her bus arrived and I climbed on with her and sat on the seat beside her.

Max looked out the window and her hand slowly snaked to mine and she intertwined her fingers with mine. “I understand why you flirt so much all the time.”

“Do you?” I asked and leaned in close to kiss her cheek.

“Peter would never do that. Even if you were faking being Ben, and I know you're not, Peter couldn't have talked to people like you do. He couldn't go to other people's tables, share food with them, or laugh and joke and wave and say hello to everyone.” Max said the last in a bit of a rush.

“You didn't like Peter, did you?” I asked.

“No.” Max said and turned her head from the window to look at me. “He was too quiet, indecisive, had a hard time answering questions with authority, which is something a decathlon member needed to learn, and I swear he attracted the attention of the worst people in the school.”

“Like flies to shit?” I joked and grinned at her.

Max looked surprised for a second and then laughed. “Val's right. You do enjoy insulting yourself.”

I paraphrased 'doctor heal thyself'. “Comedian, laugh at thyself.”

Max shook her head. “You try a little too hard, Ben. You don't have to make everything into a joke.”

“No, I don't.” I said in a soft voice and gave her a hungry look. “I would never joke about you or how much you care about me.”

Max blushed and ducked her head slightly. “Ben...”

“I hope you noticed that out of all the students in the school, and everyone that apparently knows me now, you were the only one to hug me and tell me how worried you were. You even cried for me.” I whispered and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. “That surprised me, Max. It really did.”

Max looked into my eyes for several moments before she reached up with a hand and cupped the side of my face, then she gave me the same kiss back. “What am I going to do with you?”

“I've got about an hour before I need to go home to cook, two hours if I buy fast food, or three hours if I tell Aunt May I'm eating at a friend's house and I'll stop at home to grab my work clothes on the way to work.”

Max blinked her eyes at me for several moments before she whispered. “Three hours.”

“We can do anything you want. Hang out, watch tv, play games, cook for your family, or I can lick you all over and make love to you for as long as you can stand.”

Max's mouth opened slightly and she took several long and deep breaths. “B-Ben.”

“We're having an affair, remember? An illicit, dirty, behind closed doors, secret affair.” I said and her face went red as she bit her bottom lip cutely. “Whatever you want to do, I'll do it.”

Max looked thoughtful for a moment before her face showed that she had made a decision. “I want the Isabelle treatment first.”

I almost laughed at the description and smiled. “As my sex friend asks, so shall she receive.”

Max smiled back before she looked out the bus window once more, her hand tightly clasped with mine.

*

My first discovery about Max was that she only shaved occasionally, so there was a light fuzz down there, which was great in its own way, because it tickled her as I played with her. She laughed as I made her feel good and then I discovered the second thing about her. Max was a screamer. When she came, she yelled at the top of her lungs like she was being murdered.

Let me tell you, her mother was less than impressed when she burst into Max's bedroom with a kitchen knife and saw my face buried between her daughter's legs. It also didn't help that I didn't stop until I had licked up the mess.

“You!” Max's mother said and pointed at me with the knife. “Get out!”

My spider-sense wasn't going off, so I knew it was a bluff. I kissed Max down there and covered her with her skirt, used a tissue to wipe off my mouth, and walked over to her mother and looked her in the eyes without flinching or showing weakness.

“I sincerely apologize for scaring you like that. I would have had her bite down on something if I knew she would react like that to her first real orgasm.”

“Didn't... know.” Max said in a dreamy and breathy voice. “Why is everything so sparkly?”

“It's a side effect from feeling so good.” I said without looking away from her mother. “We should probably leave her rest for a while.”

“Yes.” She said with squinted eyes and stepped out of the doorway to let me pass. She waved me forward with the knife and shut her daughter's bedroom door before she followed me out to the living room. “Keep going.”

I nodded and went to where I had left my jacket, backpack, and shoes near the front door.

She gave me a hard look as I dressed, then she opened the door for me. “Stay away from my daughter.”

I tilted my head slightly as I looked at her, then I took two steps towards her. She lifted the knife into a defensive position and my spider-sense still didn't go off. I slowly reached out and lightly touched her wrist, then moved the knife out of the way.

“If you tell her that, she'll only run to me faster and away from you trying to protect her.” I said and her eyes widened. “Tell her that you don't approve of me; but, you'll let her have an affair with me, as long as it doesn't get serious. She can have her fun for now and then she can buckle down and concentrate on college in a few months.”

She looked stunned at my words. “Why... why are you...”

“I like her and she likes me, even though I'm a bit of an ass and a terrible flirt. She wants to have some fun with a sex friend, without the commitment, because we are both too young for it to ever really go anywhere before we settle into the people we are going to be later.”

“S-s-sex f-friends?” She asked, shocked.

“It's kind of a new thing. There's a bit of romance, a lot of joking and teasing, and then some fun times in a bed. There's no stress from being girlfriend and boyfriend, either. Even if gifts are exchanged, they are usually fun and not spikes to hammer home that it's a serious relationship or will ruin it if they aren't appropriate.”

“What? But, how... how does that come about?”

Don't make a joke about Max just doing that, Ben! I thought with a smile. “There are no real requirements besides liking each other and being okay with seeing each other naked.” I said with a shrug. “There's no rules or regulations or anything specific for us to do, either.”

“Then... what's the point?” She asked.

“Exactly.” I said and leaned in to kiss her cheek. “See you next week.”

She stood there with shock on her face and I left their house with a smile on mine.