Rot Heart: A LitRPG of Rot Magic in an Ancient World (Book 1 completed)

Div was completely at a loss.

They had been sitting with their friends at the school cafeteria when it happened.

But after Gennorina's slip-up, En had completely withdrawn.

Div had to go. He had to talk to En.

Everyone was looking at him.

"Um," Gennorina said. "Diven, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was rude to shorten your name. We all do that here."

Thankfully, Lugsellos had quickly made up the perfect excuse to explain Div and En's reaction. He must have felt En crumbling.

"Don't worry about it," Div said. "But please call me Diven. It's important to me."

"Fine, Diven," Gennorina said.

"So what were we saying?" Segorix asked, trying to change the subject.

"Spirits!" Ambisena said.

"Right—Genno, you got a level out of it?" Segorix asked with an energy that made it clear he wanted to steer the conversation away from the awkwardness.

[En? Are you listening? En?]

No answer.

Div was worried. While they both were the product of Diven gaining the Sundered Mind skill, they had their own personalities. Div wasn't blind to the fact that things had been going his way since their skills had started mutating into rot-attuned versions.

En had inherited Diven's repulsion for rot. His longing for home.

Not that Div didn't sometimes dream of Kheiron or that he didn't think rot was gross. It was a matter of proportion.

En was more affected.

Div excused himself from the table, pretending he needed to relieve himself.

A glance at Lugsellos made him aware that the boy clearly understood what was happening.

But as much as Div wanted help, it was something he had to deal with himself.

It was only midday. he wasn't allowed to leave the school grounds before the end of the day. So, following what he told his friends, he isolated himself in one of the outhouses.

It wasn't the most comfortable place for a serious talk, but it was the only option he could think of.

[En!]

The only issue was that En refused to answer.

Div tried calling for a while before he paused. Sitting on the dry toilets, he looked at the wooden door that was so close it was touching his feet.

What was he doing here?

The smell hit him. It wasn't overpowering or sharp. Instead, it was wet, soggy, carried by the humid air, it permeated everything.

It was rot.

Realizing his mistake, Div exited the outhouse.

[I'm sorry, En. It wasn't the best place. But please talk to me.]

Still no answer.

Div had no choice but to return to class. With one ear, he listened to the lesson while he kept reaching out to En.

At the end of the day, he still hadn't heard from him.

"What's happening?" Lugsellos stopped Div as they were leaving the school.

"En is refusing to talk," Div said, his brows furrowed. "Can you sense him?"

"I can. He's still there if that's what you were worried about."

"How is he feeling?"

"It's not my place to tell you, Div," Lugsellos said, shaking his head.

"Come on. Lug, I need to know!"

"I'm your friend. But I'm also En's friend. If he wanted to tell you how he felt, he would."

Div scratched the back of his head in frustration. Pacing in front of Lugsellos, he said, "Then what am I supposed to do?"

Lugsellos stayed silent.

"I know it's horrible. How bad it must feel for En to hear us being called by my name. But what am I supposed to do?"

Div bit the inside of his mouth, trying to contain himself. He was angry.

Why was he angry?

He didn't know.

He wasn't angry at En. Nor was he angry at Gennorina for causing this situation. She didn't know, and it was better this way.

"Div," Lugsellos said, grasping his shoulders firmly. "You don't have to do anything. You and En are a team, everything doesn't depend on you."

Div felt his chest contract.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

"And En," Lugsellos continued. "If you can hear me, the same goes for you. I can't imagine how hard you two have it. But you need to work together if you want to move forward."

Seeing Div—and hopefully En—lost in contemplation, Lugsellos tapped them on the shoulder and left.

With his mind in a haze, Div made his way home without realizing it. Dubno, Carmeta, and Belilamos were already there. The four-year-old boy had finished eating his dinner and was getting ready for bed.

Div sat at the table and started mechanically eating the food his hosts had prepared for him.

As soon as their son was in his room, Belilamos and Carmeta sat in front of Div.

"What is it, boys?" Belilamos asked.

Div looked up from his plate.

"Nothing," he said.

"We've been your age. We can tell something isn't right," Carmeta said.

Div sighed. They weren't the ones he wanted to talk to.

[En? Please answer.]

The longer the silence in his head, the lonelier he felt. Except for a few moments when they had voluntarily withdrawn from each other, Div and En had spent their entire existence together.

It had never lasted this long.

Without him, Div felt empty.

He spoke: "En is not answering me."

"So," Carmeta said. "This is Div speaking?"

It was bitter. Belilamos and Carmeta were kind. Kinder than Div and En deserved. But Div couldn't be content.

There was always so much distance. An uncrossable barrier between him and the people he wanted to get close to.

Even Lug.

The only place where he could be himself was in Theaphilia's dreamscape. But it wasn't real.

"Yes," Div said, drier than he wanted to. "This is Div speaking."

He went on to explain what happened at the cafeteria. Belilamos and Carmeta listened quietly, waiting for him to complete his retelling.

The married couple looked at each other before turning back to Div.

"En, can you hear me?" Belilamos asked.

For a moment, Div hoped there would be an answer. But nothing came.

"Well," Belilamos continued. "I'll talk as if you can. Div, listen well, this is also for you."

He paused once again.

"There are a few people who know about your situation. Unlike the others, we don't want to pressure you to reveal your secret to everyone. Although, and I'm sure you're aware, it would solve some of the issues you've been having."

Div clenched his teeth, but before he could fully process the words, the hunter continued, "You have good reasons to hide the truth. We respect that. But ultimately, there will always be a chasm between you and those who don't know."

"But no matter what," Carmeta said, cutting off her husband. "You two must find a way to cohabit. We've heard about your goals, and your desire to become your own persons. It will only happen if you both strive for it. Together."

Div knew, and he knew En did too.

Carmeta added, "But even if it happens, it will take years. Are you really going to live like that for this long? You've only been around other people for a few weeks and you're already breaking down."

It wasn't sustainable.

"What can we do?" Div asked. "We're stuck together. There's no other way."

Carmeta stood up and moved to crouch next to Div and En.

"You two need to be honest with one another. Even if you're hiding from the world, don't hide from the other part of you," she said.

"Until you evolve, you two are—in practical terms—the same person," Belilamos added. "You need to open completely to the other. Your fears, your doubts, your convictions… Not doing so is akin to lying to yourself. Fight and argue all you want, but do it with the intention to better your collective self."

Div put his hands on his face. Sure, he agreed with the idea, but he couldn't do that while En refused to answer.

"And," Carmeta said. "Don't think we're saying that only to get En to talk. Div, I'm sure there are plenty of things you haven't told En."

Carmeta's words forced Div to reconsider. He had been blaming the situation on En—and maybe, today, that was justified. But had he been fully honest with his other half?

[I resent you for pushing all the rot onto me. Just because I'm willing to do it doesn't make it okay. I'm tired of watching you escape reality. I'm still annoyed at how you wanted to surrender to the guardians. I'm mad at you. I'm sick of your constant whining. I don't want you in my head.]

Div took a deep breath.

[But I don't want to lose you.]

He stopped, racking his head to find other things to say. There had to be more.

[I want to dive into rot magic, I want to evolve, I want to ascend. Who knows? Maybe even transcend! I want to use all the skills our struggles have earned us. No matter how distasteful they are. I want to be bold. I want to prove them all wrong.]

Was there more? Perhaps, but Div didn't get the chance to say it.

(I will merge back into you.)

[What? En?]

(I will merge my mind back into yours. I will give up everything. You can be what you dream to be. I will return my half of our soul to you, and I will disappear.)

[No. I can't accept that.]

(It is the right thing to do, Div. I heard you. There is so much you aspire to be. So much you desire. So many dreams. I don't have any of that.)

[That's not true, En.]

(The only thing I want is to be free of the rot. And now I know how to achieve that.)

Div took in the words of his other mind. Of his other self.

[Brother. Don't lie to yourself. You've always yearned for Kheiron, for the Leios clan, for sun magic.]

(What is there to yearn for? None of this is possible now.)

[Splitting our mind was impossible, surviving the rift was impossible. Yet we did it. Our evolution already seems impossible, let us just add another wish to it. When we separate, your bloodline will be sun-attuned.]

There was a pause in their thoughts.

Belilamos and Carmeta stayed silent, sensing the internal struggle that went on in their protégé's head.

Div felt his heart beating at a rate that wasn't his own. Too fast, too slow.

Erratic.

(Then let's tell the truth.)

[En?]

(Let's tell the truth to everyone. To Genno, Seg, and Ambi, at least.)

[Why? They will reject us.]

(I'd rather be cast out again than live in fear of it happening.)

Div sighed. He had to be honest.

[I'm scared. But let's do it.]

(Thank you, and I'm sorry.)

[We will get through this, En. Together.]

(We will, brother.)

Div and En looked at their hosts. For the first time, they truly saw the worry in their eyes. Carmeta and Belilamos were good people. They were lucky to have met them.

"This is En speaking. Carmeta, Belilamos, thank you."

"This is Div speaking. Thank you."

"Do you feel better?" Carmeta asked.

"Yes," they said. "But we need your advice."

"What else is on your minds?" Belilamos asked.

Div and En licked their lips and opened their mouth several times. It was a difficult thing to say.

(Count to three. One, two, three.)

"We will tell the truth to the others. Please help us."

"Oh?" Carmeta said, smiling. "Well, I think showing your sincerity is a must. Be honest, tell them of your fears, apologize for duping them."

"That's it?" Div and En asked.

"It's already a lot!" Belilamos laughed.