Chapter 8 - good kid

“We’ll arrive in 20 minutes” Nodding, I feel the rectangular-shaped thing in my hands.

I don't think smartphones are really useful to me.

Touching a button at the side, I tilt my head in question. Marting gave me the phone to pass the time but– it's not like I can tell if it's on.

Nevermind. Widening my eyes in wonder, I look at Martin’s direction.

“I activated the disability mode, so you don’t have to worry about unnecessary stuff, like if the phone is on or not, or which app you just opened”

That's really useful and convenient. Nodding my head, I touch the screen.

[lock screen]

[home screen]

[Opening YouVideo]

YouVideo? What kind of name is that?

[Watch “This is why the ancient mammoth could reasonably solo the country of Madagascar: A video essay” by TurnOnTheAC?]

What the–

 

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[Now that we know all of the recorded histories for both of our opponents, Let’s go through all the possible reasons they could fight each other]

To think the history of both of them was that deep.

“We’re finally here” Hearing the sound of the car stopping, I sloppily pause the video and turn the phone off.

Stretching my arm with the phone in my hand, I wait for him to take it.

“Thank you, let’s get you out” With the sound of a door closing, I try to get the seatbelt off.

Why is this so hard? Come on!

“Kiddo, it’s like this” Hearing the voice coming over from the door, I stop trying to open the stupid seatbelt.

“You just have to tap it twice, then twist it” 

??? huh? whoever designed that deserves to get fired.

Before I could get out of the car, I heard Martin talk again.

"Leave the straw hat in the car, it's going to annoy you while eating" Grimacing, I take off the straw hat with a heavy heart and throw it inside. What a shame, I’m sure we’ll reunite later.

Stepping out of the car, I look around.

OK, maybe I should stop doing the same ‘joke’, it’s not that funny anyways.

Taking Martin’s hand, we begin walking.

He can whistle really well, this tune is a vibe. Bobbing my head to the music, I begin to think about where we are going.

If it's fast food, that means hamburger and fries right?

"Watch your step, we’re here"

With the sound of a door sliding, we step inside.

This is too much.

The sound of people talking, the sizzling of food, and the condensation of so many smells make my head almost go dizzy.

Woah, so many things at once. Shaking my head to get rid of the dizziness, I keep my hand tight on Martin’s.

“Welcome to WackDonald’s, what can I get you?”

“Can I get 2 BigWacks and a JollyMeal?” Who thought naming a company 'WackDonald' would be a good idea?

“Alright sir, that will be 18 dollars”

“This economy is going to …" While grumbling, he slips his hands away from me.

“Here you go” After saying that, He grabs my hand again.

“The order will be done soon, hope you have a wacktastic experience!” Hearing the cashier say that with a cheerful voice so forced even a deaf person could tell, I smile at him. Mouthing a silent “you too”.

“Let’s go to a table, Alex should be here– around now”

“...”

“Or not, usually I get the timing right”

With a thunderous voice announcing its presence, I feel my body tremble at the sheer volume of it. 

“I am here!”

“Dude, you don’t have to scream. Everyone is looking at us now.” Good thing I can't see, I would be more embarrassed than I am right now.

“My bad” While they talk to each other about delays and whatnot, we make it to a table and take a seat.

“I’ll go and wait for the food, take care of the kid” As Martin leaves, I start swinging my legs in anticipation.

“Kid, did you have fun today? I’m sorry for having Martin take care of you, But I have work and stuff” Hearing him cough awkwardly, I do a small nod.

“I got this for you, by the way” Tilting my head I think to myself.

Got what for me?

“It’s a teddy bear” Hearing the joy in his voice, I stretch my arms in front of me to grab it.

“Take it”

I think im a little old for this, what is my age anyways?

“I hope you like it” Nodding my head, I keep the bear close to me.

“Do you want to hear what happened while I was working?” Not listening for a response, he continues.

“So there was this guy, right? Real shady-looking, hoodie on his face, zero to no eye contact, the whole pack. I followed him for around an hour when he went inside this alley” 

I think I know where this is going

“And of course, a dude appears from who knows–”

“Yo, I’m back”

“Thanks Bro, I’m looking forward to the food, I’m hungry. Bet the kid is too” Nodding, I grab the paper-wrapped burger and start unwrapping it.

“What were you two talking about?”

“Just telling the kid about work”

“Oh? So what happened?”

“Common deal in a shady ally in resume. But the buyer literally appeared from the shadows” I hear Martin Chuckle at that comment.

“Hah! You didn’t get something so straight out of a comic since forever” I guess it’s pretty cliche.

“Isn’t that right? Reminded me of when I was younger”

While listening to the conversation, I finally unwrap the burger. Bringing it to my mouth, I take a bite.

Bliss. Burger is bliss, burger is wonderful.

The taste is so heavenly it could take me straight into the sky.

“You like it kiddo?” Nodding to Alex, I eat faster.

“I guess she never really ate something comparable to fast food with her previous living conditions”

“Of course she didn’t, why do you have to say something so obvious Martin? Don’t try to sound smart for no reason dude” Pausing a little, Alex talks again.

“Try to eat a little slower darling, You might choke” Forcefully swallowing, I calm myself.

This is like nothing else I’ve ever tasted. Not like I tasted many things.

Taking a smaller bite, I think about the various foods I’ve eaten.

I think chocolate is still better.

“–then he said ‘Enforcer, you cannot dwarf my plans for they have already been completed” Wow…

“Why do you always get those types?” Hearing Martin sigh, I keep hearing in befuddlement.

He goes against that type of people so much that it's like a running gag?!

“Of course, his shadow people were really tricky but I defeated him” I bet he’s smiling really hard right now, his voice tells it all.

“Another win for The Enforcer”

“Yeah sure, at least I had a heavy workout for my troubles”

“The shadows must’ve been a real pain in the ass if it was a heavy workout for you”

“And I came out stronger because of it” At that, both of them chuckle.

Tilting my head, I wonder what was so funny about that. Did I miss a joke?

“How about we take a walk in the park? It seems the kid finished eating” A walk in the park, sounds nice.

Nodding, I hear them shuffle things on the table and then we begin making our way out.

“I’ll go with the kid at the back” Shaking my head in disagreement, I close the door of the car behind me.

Don’t want to trouble him more than I already do.

“–Or not” Trying to keep his laughter contained, I hear Martin talk between chuckles.

“I guess her decision really ‘Blind sided’ you huh?”

“Martin, comedy isn’t for your thing”

“One day I’ll make it big” With such confidence in his voice, the roaring sound of the automobile attacks my ears.

“The park isn’t that far away” I hope a pigeon doesn’t poop on me. Thinking about that, I wear the straw hat again.

 

BOOM!

 

“I can’t even take A FUCKING WALK IN THE PARK WITHOUT–”