Restart, Spider-Man!

The red-and-blue figure landed with a deafening crash, cracking the ground and scattering debris.

Above, the underside of the spaceship flared to life, unleashing a barrage of laser beams that rained down, engulfing Xia Luo's silhouette.

"BOOM!!"

In an instant, the explosion swallowed Xia Luo, searing heat blasting outwards as students shrieked and scattered in fear.

Dr. Octopus and the others quickly began to retreat.

"What are you running for?" Mysterio shouted.

Doc Ock gestured at the ship above. "That thing looks serious."

"Idiot, it's just regular bombs disguised as lasers!"

"What?"

The Sinister Six paused, staring as, from the intense flames, Xia Luo's form surged forth, crackling with powerful magic energy.

"Die!"

Eyes filled with fury, Xia Luo rocketed out like a missile, cutting through the Sandman's massive body and heading straight for Mysterio on the rooftop.

"No, stop him!"

Mysterio paled and released clouds of smoke, hoping to mess with Xia Luo's spider-sense.

But Xia Luo's real target wasn't Mysterio—it was the building beneath him.

With everyone already evacuated, Mysterio wouldn't be too far away if he wanted to keep the illusions intact.

He had to be inside that building somewhere.

Regardless of whether this Mysterio was a hologram or not, all Xia Luo had to do was bring the whole building down.

With that, a burst of magic energy crashed into the building. As a spider insignia burst into an explosion, support beams began crumbling, and the walls started to crack.

"Crack! Crack!"

"BOOM!"

Within seconds, the entire building collapsed under Doc Ock and the others' horrified gazes.

"No!"

"BOOOOOM!"

Soon after, Mysterio's scream was cut off as the building imploded, sending a cloud of dust billowing out.

But before the sandstorm could reach the remaining villains, the colossal Sandman expanded, sucking up the dust and debris, causing his size to swell to thirty meters.

"SPIDER-MAN, DIE!"

The giant raised a sandy fist, stirring up a storm of debris as he slammed down, aiming to crush Xia Luo into oblivion.

Xia Luo ignored the descending hand.

"Zzz…"

Switching into his electric form, a streak of lightning arced around the massive hand, bringing him within striking range of Doctor Octopus.

"What?"

Doc Ock's eyes widened, desperately flailing his metal arms to fend off the electric bolt.

"Zzzz…"

"BOOM!"

The bolt danced between the tentacles before slamming into Doc Ock, dragging him into the rubble.

"Damn it!"

"What are you all waiting for? Get him together!" shouted the Vulture.

"Kill Spider-Man!"

Immediately, the Vulture, Lizard, Chameleon, and a man-sized Scorpion pounced, all charging at Xia Luo.

Meanwhile, from the rubble, a red-gloved hand shakily emerged, making a rude gesture a second later.

"Oh, for Wade's sake!"

With a clatter of sliding rocks, a figure clad in red, wielding two swords, clawed his way out of the debris.

He shook off the dust and gave a few enthusiastic jumps, sending stones flying.

"Well, well, school demolition day already? Nice!"

Then he noticed his foot jammed into a cracked glass sphere.

"Crack!"

Wade: "…"

"Oh, crap—my poor pinky toe."

Attempting to look cool, he performed a little leg flick in a half-baked tribute to Michael Jackson, finally dislodging the piece of glass.

"Oh wow, I am slick!"

Noticing the battle nearby, he cheerfully pulled out his phone from… somewhere in his suit.

Turning the camera toward himself, with Spider-Man and the villains in a brawl behind him, he began recording.

"Hey there, folks, good evening… or wait, no, good afternoon! It's your favorite pal—you can call me the death-defying Waiter, or Captain of the E-force. But my friends, you just call me Deadpool."

Right on cue, rubble flew toward him from the ongoing battle, forcing him to shield his phone.

"Pew pew pew!"

Sharp rocks whizzed past, grazing his suit. After the shower stopped, Wade pulled his phone back up, resuming the recording.

"Ahem, sorry about that little interruption. But hey, not a problem, really."

He paused, pulling a bloody shard from a gaping hole in his backside.

"Ta-da! Just a scratch, my friends. You don't need to worry about me—nothing comes between me and my love for you!"

"Okay, with that intro done, let's dive into the action! Today, live from right here, we're watching a real Spider-Man throwdown against some nasty villains. It's electrifying! Last time I felt this pumped was in the bathroom stall of some bar. A girl named Janie—no, not Jenny—took me to cloud nine."

He turned the camera toward the splattered remains of Jenny.

"Whoops! My bad! Not to be mistaken with this Jenny—poor guy got shredded earlier. Wanna see his remains? Oh, right—autocensor blurred him out."

Wade then jumped down from the ruins, scratching his head.

"Wait, how do I know his name was Jenny? Oh well, logic is for the B-list heroes."

"BOOM!"

The ground shook, and the colorful Chameleon landed in a crater, coughing up blood.

Wade immediately jumped in beside him, shoving the camera in his face.

"Mind if I interview you real quick?"

Chameleon: "…"

"Oh, silence means consent! That's great."

Wade pulled the guy's head over for a selfie before continuing.

"My fans wanna know—what's your deal with Spider-Man? What terrible fate are you avenging?"

"Not that I care. What I really want to know is, did you eat breakfast this morning? And if so, why are you still getting your butt kicked by a bug? Or if you didn't eat breakfast, well… don't you think you'd be dead from hunger by now?"

He put his boot on the Chameleon's throat, brandishing a knife.

"Alright, folks, fair warning—viewer discretion is advised!"

"Squish!"

The screen momentarily went black before resuming.

"All done! We managed to dodge the censorship bots. Now, I'm sure you're wondering, 'Why did Deadpool kill him?' Come on, people, I'm a superhero! A frontline hero! It's what we do."

"Oh, heads up—a tentacle's coming this way! I'll just, uh, grab it real quick…"

With a triumphant grin, Wade latched onto one of Doc Ock's metal arms.

"Nice! I heard this has six times the protein of steak—ugh! Never mind, it's all machine oil. But hey, now I know the brand! Let's use it for a barbecue next time."

Humming to himself, Wade hopped over Doc Ock's now-limp form.

"Oops! Sorry if that grossed anyone out. Anyway, back to our main attraction—

"Oh, wow!

"What is that?

"A shooting star? No, that's Spider-Man!"

"BOOM!!"

With the next explosion, Wade threw himself to the ground, expertly shielding his phone.

In a moment, the blast passed over him.

"Hey, I'm still here, surprised?"

Standing, Wade pointed his phone toward the scene—a huge, smoking crater.

"Oh, and look over there—Scorpion. Doesn't he look ridiculous, split right down the middle! Haha, I can't stop laughing! No, no, sorry—this isn't funny at all."

Continuing his stroll across the battlefield, Wade moved casually even as sand erupted in another magical explosion, scattering into a sprawling sand sea. Wade dove in, swimming gracefully.

"Ohhh~~ You'll never guess what I'm doing.

"Yep, pretending to swim! But here's the secret—my feet are totally touching the ground.

"Oh no!! A giant fist in the sand! And… yuck! It's a muscled chest. Sorry folks, not interested in that!"

He leapt onto Sandman's chest and poked it with his finger.

"Hmm, not a great texture. Wouldn't recommend doing this because…"

He looked up. Sandman's massive hand was descending on him in fury.

"BOOM!"

"Wham!"

Wade flew across the battlefield, his twisted body standing up zombie-style.

"See? That's why."

He shrugged, pocketing his phone just as Sandman's massive foot descended. Wade dove, narrowly avoiding the sandy heel.

"BOOM~~"

The rubble shook as Wade slid into a crack in the debris.

"Awfully dark down here. Feels like I've crossed into the DC Universe. But no worries, it's just Spider-Central."

He angled the camera out at the chaotic scene outside.

"Oh my gawd, that big guy just won't quit! I'm honestly getting a little teary-eyed—it's like looking at my buddy, Wolverine. Eternal life is such a curse."

Sniffing dramatically, he looked away, eyes suspiciously shiny. "Nope, ignore that moisture—it's just excitement! No, wait! The sewer pipes broke under Spidey's blasts, and that big guy's getting washed away by the flood! What a shame—rescinding my moment of empathy."

His phone flickered, and Wade shook it with annoyance.

"Man, I knew I should've shelled out the extra $300 for waterproofing."

Peeking out of the rubble, he spotted Spider-Man approaching and waved.

"Hey there, Spidey! I'm Batman. Ever heard of the Dark Knight?"

Xia Luo: "…"

"I've only heard of Green Lantern." Xia Luo brushed sand off his shoulders.

Wade crossed his arms, laughing heartily. "HAHA! Well, I killed the jerk who played Green Lantern! You'll never understand the satisfaction."

As Wade continued rambling, Xia Luo sighed, rubbing his temples.

For the first time, he'd met someone who could out-talk him.

Ignoring Wade's endless monologue, Xia Luo tapped his wrist device.

"What's the status?" he asked.

Carter responded from the other end, "Hell's Kitchen is secure for now. No one knows Ben Parker and Aunt May's real identities."

Hearing this, Xia Luo sighed in relief.

He could restart the day, but watching loved ones die again and again wasn't something he wanted to endure.

"Good, let Harry know. We'll rendezvous in Hell's Kitchen."

"Harry's dead. I saw it with my own eyes," came a familiar voice from behind him.

Turning, Xia Luo spotted Lizard Parker, staring blankly at Gwen's body.

"Peter?" Xia Luo blinked. "Didn't you already… die?"

Lizard Parker glanced at the remains of the Sinister Six among the rubble and sighed.

"Last time, you didn't take these guys out for good. They came for Gwen again, and I tried to save her…"

Before he could finish, Wade whipped a white handkerchief from somewhere down his suit, dabbing fake tears.

"Boo-hoo! This is just so moving. Real men cry too—top-tier heroes have a tender heart."

Lizard Parker looked over, scowling. "Who is this guy?"

Xia Luo shrugged. "A nuisance."

"No!"

Wade pointed an accusing finger at Xia Luo. "Our suits are basically twins—you can't call me that! I'm here to help you, you know!"

Xia Luo held up a hand, backing up a step. "You're right, sorry. But your suit looks suspiciously inspired by a ragdoll. Those dark circles are… quite the statement. Care to share how you even got here?"

Wade touched his eyes thoughtfully, softening. "At last, someone who understands."

He spread his arms wide, beaming as he moved in for a hug.

"Ever since I first heard the name Spider-Man, I knew you'd get me! To find you, I licked that guy's toes—no need to thank me."

He patted Xia Luo's back, then slyly slipped his hand lower, only to be met by Xia Luo's knee, directly into his gut.

"Ohhhh!"

Wade dropped to his knees, groaning in agony.

"Why the Wade F… would you do that to a frontline hero?!"

Lizard Parker glanced over, baffled. "What is he talking about?"

Xia Luo spread his hands. "If I had to guess… I'd say he's mentally deranged."

Lizard Parker nodded. "That makes sense."

Wade: "…"

"Whoosh!"

A green streak sliced through the sky as pumpkin bombs rained down.

"Spider-Man, it's your end!"

"Green Goblin!" Lizard Parker hissed. "But he… Gwen cured him; he shouldn't be here."

"He's this universe's Goblin," Xia Luo explained, preparing to web up the bombs.

"I've got this!"

Wade took a running leap into the air.

"It's time to show off some real skill!"

"Hoo-ah!"

In a flash, he unsheathed both swords, twirling them into a dizzying blur as he sliced through bomb after bomb.

"RUN!" Xia Luo yelled, dragging Lizard Parker away.

Mid-air, Wade suddenly paused, noticing his mistake.

"Ah, crap… these aren't bullets—"

"BOOOOM!"

The explosion erupted, a sea of fire and smoke consuming him. Severed limbs and singed bits of Deadpool rained down, one hand flipping off everything in sight.

"Thud!"

The hand hit the ground, and Norman Osborn burst out laughing.

"Hahaha! Finally, Spider-Man's dead!"

Wade: "…"

Head lolling, Wade glared up at the laughing figure in the sky.

"Oh, f— you, you dollar-store fanboy! I'm Batman, you idiot!"

Before Norman could get a good look, a burst of lightning streaked through the air.

"Zzzzzt!"

"BOOM!"

The Goblin erupted in midair, Xia Luo flipping gracefully to the ground below.

"Tell me, what happened to Harry?" he asked Lizard Parker.

Lizard Parker looked up at Xia Luo.

"It was Spider-Man—Spider-Man killed him. One with three arms…"

---

T/N: jesus thank god he can restart everyones dying1!!

Oh, hey there, Traveler! 🍃 My friend here is the one bringing these stories to you—quite the talent, wouldn't you agree? If anything feels off, just give them a nudge—they're always happy to make things even better.

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Here's to more adventures and endless inspiration~ 🎵