Respawn Condition: Trash Mob

Scurrying over the ice, my nails that are digging into the surface as I run are the only things stopping me slipping and falling down flat on my pointy, but beautiful, rat face. The frozen floors beneath myself are sleek and smooth. My tiny body aches already from the burn of the icy air around myself. The sewer was cold, but there were many brothers there. There were many pipes and fumes there. The only thing now that can keep me warm is my eternal love for queen-queen.

But I guess she hates me now too. I sigh. The instant I open my mouth to exhale the cold enters me, stinging my teeth and throat as it worms its way down into my body like a hungry parasite. Shuddering, I close my mouth again and make a note to keep it that way.

  Frozen bodies line the walls, line the floor I walk over. Constantly I see them, feel them watching me from every angle. Reaching for me. Even unmoving the thousand rotten, frost-bitten, frozen hands of the dead look as if even now they were prying and clawing, trying to dig their way out of the ice in vain. I begin to wonder how many of them there are, but there are too many for me to count as I can’t stop moving. As I have to keep up my pace which I have set to that of a brisk walk. Everywhere. Above, below, left, right. Everywhere eyes stare at me through the ice. Black, hollowed and rotted out sockets stare at me through the ice. What a lovely place this is.

  Dungeon-master, can we talk? What’s this place about? Were you going through a phase when you made it? I mean, I get it. I understand, dungeon-master. Sometimes we all get a little edgy, a little dark. Sometimes we all want to make a frozen pit that swallows anything that enters it alive. I’ve been there. We all have. It’s just a part of life. But this might be a little too much right now, you know?

  As I continue on down through the icy labyrinth I think and I wonder what the thief-girl is doing now. If I know her, I bet she’s on her way up here right now. Probably sweatily sprinting up the real staircase to this floor as we speak, I can picture it perfectly. Next time when I respawn I’ll have to remember that I owe the fire-elemental one for helping me out. I don’t know specifically what I owe her one of, but I know I owe her one. Anyways on better news, I can’t feel my ear anymore. The missing one. On worse news, I can’t feel my feet anymore. They aren’t entirely missing just yet if we aren’t counting skin.

  Already now though I miss the warmth of the floor below, the warmth of the bread. I wonder if I should have just stayed inside the loaf, just eaten and slept in it until I faded away. Hmm. I mean, it would have been a good day for sure but, nah. I squeak silently through my closed mouth. What fun would that be? Hmm? Hey, wait. Listen. Do you hear that too? I perk my one good ear up listening to some strange squelching sound in the distance. But a moment later it stops. Odd. But... sure, weirder things happen in the dungeon every day. Hmm. Feeling somewhat uneasy I continue onward.

  Where am I going anyways? This place all looks the same I think to myself. Sleek, shimmering blue is everywhere. Everything glistens, glowing from a white light I can’t explain. One that just seems to come from beneath the ice only to illuminate the inside of this floor. Dungeon magic? Dungeon magic. I suppose there is one difference though, one thing that separates this meter of corridor from the one behind myself. The dead. Everywhere I look there is at least one dead creature or person visible in the ice. I suppose that’s one way to remember where you’ve been. Like that minotaur above myself, dark-fur. Well uh… endowed. Female. Haven’t seen that one before.

Looking at the section I’m standing in for only a brief moment, I stand still and decide which way of the three ways before me to take. I opt to take the right path. It’s the right path after all. Get it?

As I nudge forward to continue walking, already I feel the first tug of the ice sticking to my skin. The ice already having tried to take hold of me and keep me there forever like all the rest of them; just from a few seconds of staying still. Well, I don’t want to be trapped in a block of demonic ice. Shoo-shoo demon ice! Shoo-shoo!

  Hmm, wait a second. Couldn’t I just look at my map? I neglected to do that on the last floor, but I’m all alone now so it should be fine I guess. Ah. But it’s kind of awkward to walk with it open. Uh… I look around, searching for any answers to my dilemma. But there is nowhere to stand that isn’t part of the all consuming ice. Nowhere that isn’t shimmering with a bright, lustrous blue. Like the hungry eyes of an ice-dragon just waiting to devour my precious little rat body.

  As I think, I keep on scamper-scampering, going down one corridor to the next looking for anything. I stop for a second as I see a long, winding green form in the wall to my side. A long, green serpent deep beneath the ice. Neat. I look at the frozen creature, its venomous fangs barred in a dramatic pose. How did it even get here I wonder. They aren’t exactly land creatures, so does that mean there’s some connection to the Wet Slippery Fun Place?

  Then again… I keep walking, looking at the other figures I see now and then. The cultists, the humans. Why are there humans here? Lots of questions today friend, same as always. I shiver. Dang it’s cold here. One thing that is neat though; there are some other creatures here too. Things I don’t really remember having seen before. Some odd feline mixture with an almost human face. A large headless suit of armor. How do I know that’s a trash-mob and not just some empty armor? The metal is black and covered in skulls, friend. Clear sign of a dungeon-dweller there. Then again, I do recognize one or two of them from somewhere in my lizard brain.

  Look, that one there. See that one? That’s a Satyr. They’re a bit too wild for my tastes, but great at a party you know? Oh! And there, that big green one? Lizard man. Real lazy dudes, but in a good way. They just like to sit around somewhere hot, eat the occasional child. You know, the good life. All manner of oddities surround me. If this place wasn’t so terrible, it’d be pretty nice to walk around, tell you what.

Speaking of walking, to heck with it. I have a second to spare, I think to myself and open my menu to look at my map.

Ah?