Reincarnating as a demon in sousou no frieren

I woke up, or so I thought. Something wasn't right. My body... it didn't feel like it used to. I couldn't move my arms, my legs, or even feel the air going in and out of my lungs. I wasn't breathing, but somehow I wasn't drowning. It was strange, as if I didn't need to. Even more disturbing was how calm I felt. Too calm, in an unnatural way. 

I was trapped. I didn't know where or how, but something was surrounding me, enveloping me. I tried to move, but I couldn't. A cocoon? A coffin? I couldn't tell. The only thing that was clear was that I should be scared, desperate to understand what was happening. But I wasn't. Why was I not more scared? I asked myself over and over again. 

Then it all came back to me, all at once. I was dead. The gunshot, the pain, the darkness... I was dead. But if that was true, where was I now? I didn't know, and the questions crushed me. What I did know was that I would never see my family or friends again. The people I loved and everything I cared about were left behind. 

I thought I should feel broken, that pain and sadness should consume every fiber of my being. But they didn't. Just a small shadow of sadness enveloped me, nothing more. Why didn't I feel worse? I kept thinking about it, about whether I had really loved my family and friends as much as I always thought, or if this strange place was affecting my emotions, stripping me of what made me human. 

There were no answers. I couldn't move, only think. So I waited. Time was passing, though I couldn't know how much. Maybe, in time, I would understand what was happening, but for now, all I could do was wait.