Ch70- Heart to Heart
The gravity of his words was palpable, hanging heavily in the garden's still air. Yoruichi and Kukaku, always quick to respond, found themselves at a rare loss for words. They reached out to take his hands, their gestures offering him the solace he seemed to desperately need. Kazuki gripped their hands in return, his fingers conveying a silent appreciation for their unwavering support.
Drawing a steadying breath, his voice grew even softer, yet every word rang clear. "I need to share a secret with you. It's something that holds potential dangers for me, but I trust you both more than anyone."
Kukaku's instincts screamed at her to halt his confession, to shield him from whatever storm might be looming. But her voice got trapped, silenced by the firm squeeze of his hand, urging her to let him continue.
"I was the one who maimed Tokinada," he whispered.
For a moment, time seemed to stand still. The garden, the world, everything faded away as the weight of that confession settled in. Yoruichi's usually agile mind took a moment longer than usual to process, her gaze flickering with a myriad of thoughts, trying to piece together the implications. Kukaku, however, was fueled by raw emotion, and without a second thought, she surged forward, wrapping her arms tightly around Kazuki's neck in a protective embrace.
Yoruichi, never one to be outdone, soon joined the hug, wrapping her arms around both of them. For a few precious moments, the world outside ceased to matter. There were no secrets, no looming threats, just the comforting embrace of people who genuinely cared.
Pulling back slightly, Kukaku's fiery eyes bore into Kazuki's. "Why? Why did you risk your life?" Her voice wasn’t accusatory, merely desperate for understanding.
Kazuki then began his explanation, the weight of his words heavy in the silent garden. "From the first day at the Academy, there was something about Aizen that put me on edge. There wasn't any reason for it – no memories, no past confrontations – but every time I looked at him, every time I heard his voice, there was an inexplicable dread that coiled within me. Similarly, Tousen's very name felt like a beacon of danger. Oddly enough, both these sensations were not about memories, but rather forebodings, almost as if my soul was cautioning me about the peril they represented."
He paused, taking a moment to collect himself before diving into the more painful memories. "On the night I confronted Tokinada, that same fear – the one that usually centered on Aizen – shifted. It was stronger, more palpable. It took me a while, but eventually, I honed in on a name: Kakyô Shiba. The realization was as baffling as it was disturbing. Why would the thought of Kakyô, someone I held in deep respect, invoke such fear in me?"
Kazuki’s gaze shifted between Yoruichi and Kukaku, ensuring he had their full attention. "I made my way to the 10th Division, trying to decipher the reason behind my distress. That's when I saw Tokinada, pinning Kakyô against a wall. The words he spat were venomous, filled with malice. The scene painted a clear picture of his twisted intentions."
Kukaku's hands clenched into fists. Even without details, she could visualize the traumatic scene, the torment her aunt had been subjected to by that man. She already knew about Tokinada's malevolent tendencies but hearing it first-hand from someone who had witnessed it brought a whole new layer of fury.
"I didn't hesitate," Kazuki continued, his voice steady. "I trailed him discreetly, and overheard his vile plans. The disdain he had for Kakyô was evident. He was envious of her prowess, of her natural talent that had overshadowed him during their Academy days. He aimed to bring her down, to humiliate her in the worst ways possible."
The more he spoke, the clearer the picture became to Yoruichi and Kukaku. They understood now why Kazuki had taken such a bold, dangerous step against Tokinada. For Kakyô, for justice, and maybe even for the innate sense of righteousness that burned brightly within him.
"The moment I overheard his intent," Kazuki went on, "I knew I couldn't stand by. There was no choice. It was a split-second decision. The only path I saw was to incapacitate him, to ensure he could no longer be a threat to Kakyô or anyone else."
Yoruichi's gaze remained intense but compassionate. "That's a heavy burden to bear on your own, Kazuki. Why didn’t you share this sooner?"
Kazuki sighed, a mix of relief and regret. "I didn’t want to draw either of you into the mess I'd created. The more people who knew, the higher the risk. And I didn't want to see anyone I care about getting hurt because of my actions."
Kukaku’s voice was soft but fierce. "Don't ever think you're alone in this, Kazuki. We stand together. Always."
Yoruichi nodded in agreement. "We are in this together. Always remember, you don’t have to bear every weight alone. We're here for you."
Kazuki looked at both of them, his heart swelling with gratitude. He looked at them both, gratitude evident in his eyes. "That night taught me something." He took another deep breath, the air seeming to stick in his throat. "My assumptions about memories I couldn't remember warning me were false. When Aizen attacked me, his Zanpakuto was newly awakened, yet I'd been wary of him from day one. And if it was my past concerning Kakyô warning me, how did I discern it would occur that particular night?"
Yoruichi's eyes sharpened. "Precognition?" she asked, latching onto the word.
Kazuki nodded, "I'm not certain if it's the ability to sense the future or something more complex, but I'm convinced they aren't remnants of my past."
He then squeezed their hands, his grip warm yet trembling slightly. "This also means the woman I see in my visions isn't a remnant from a forgotten past, but potentially someone from my future." He paused, searching for words, then exhaled heavily. "In my indecisiveness, I developed feelings for both of you. I was so afraid of causing hurt that I inadvertently deepened my bond with each of you."
Both women were taken aback by his sudden confession. The weight of his words, the raw honesty in his voice, and the sheer vulnerability he displayed was uncharacteristic of the usually confident Kazuki they knew.
“I never meant for this to happen,” Kazuki's voice trembled, betraying the whirlwind of emotions he was trying to keep under control. “The last thing I wanted was to play with your emotions or come off as duplicitous.”
Silence descended upon the garden, the only sound being the gentle rustling of leaves. Kukaku, always the fiery spirit, struggled to find the right words. She took a moment, then with a heavy sigh said, "It's not entirely your fault, Kazuki. Feelings aren’t always a choice, and circumstances can push us in directions we never expected."
Yoruichi, ever the tactician, considered the implications. “While I appreciate your honesty, this isn't just about you. This involves both of us too."
Kazuki looked down, clearly struggling. “I know it sounds foolish, but I want to free both of you from this mess I've created. Neither of you deserve this uncertainty. Not from me.”
Kukaku gently nudged his shoulder. “And who says we want to be freed? Isn't it our choice?”
“Yes, but...” Kazuki hesitated, “I don't want to be the reason for any tension or hurt between the two of you."
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