Reincarnated as an Elf’s Best Friend

After eating a hearty breakfast of only deer, I said my farewells and left with my sister. The return trip wasn’t very eventful, and it was a lot faster too, as Mirefa decided to carry me and run the entire way.

 

When we arrived at the outskirts of the elven village, I told my sister, “Okay, I can walk back now. Thanks, and see you again soon.”

 

“Why are you saying goodbye right now? I thought I might as well take this time to see where you live. Maybe even hang out?”

 

I replied, “You know it’s usually impolite to show up unannounced right?”

 

“But we do that all the time back home!”

 

Actually, now that I think about it, that is true with all the lupoy. “Well, uh, at least for elven customs it isn’t.”

 

“Oh,” she said. “Then you can go in, tell them I’m coming, and then come fetch me right after.”

 

“Usually you give them more than a few minutes notice in advance?”

 

“But our parents would throw a fit if I was late again. You also wouldn’t want that to happen, right?”

 

At this time, Anortha’s parents wouldn’t be home, and knowing Anortha she would probably be more than happy. So I replied, “Alright, fine, but whatever you do, please don’t get overexcited and break anything. Actually don’t touch anything unless I explicitly give you permission to.”

 

“Yay!”

We arrived at the gate, where the two guards stood on duty.

 

“Shoo! Go away, you dumb beasts,” The elf on the right said as he brandished his spear.

 

I glared at him as I stuck out my middle finger as offensively upright as possible.

 

The other elf on the left side laughed. “I almost didn’t recognize you, Pochi, since you’re usually wearing some clothes, but then no one else would flip him off like that. Come on in. Although, who is the other one?”

 

I grabbed a branch off the ground and wrote “my sister.” While doing that, I told Mirefa, “You know how I stuck out my middle finger at that elf on the right?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Do the same thing. Also remember that it’s a special greeting only reserved for him. Don’t do it to the other elves you see.”

 

“Okay!” she replied as she also stuck out her middle finger.

 

“Oh my, they’re multiplying,” the guard on the left said. The other guard just glared at us as we walked through the gate.

 

“So,” my sister began, “Why do the elves all live in trees? How do they move when they hunt all the deer around the area?”

 

“Uh, they usually don’t eat deer, and they usually don’t move houses?”

 

My sister looked horrified, and patted me on the head, while saying, “I’m so sorry. No wonder why you can’t hunt deer or enjoy their meat. I’ll make sure to visit often and bring tons of deer over.”

 

I imagined how Anortha would react if my sister showed up with a deer carcass, and quickly said, “No. Please don’t.”

 

“You don’t want me to visit?” my sister said as she gave me the saddest look possible.

 

“Not that. I meant please don’t bring deer over. I know you are obsessed with deer, but there are plenty of other foods that I get to eat that are tastier than deer.”

 

Mirefa looked at me as if I grew another head.

 

“No really. Wait, didn’t you already eat some earlier the first time you came? You did say it tasted good.”

 

“Huh? Oh that? But it had meat and stuff in it though. Also if you replaced that meat with deer meat I’m sure it’ll taste even better. So once they run out of whatever animal that was, how do they get more?”

 

“So as long as there is meat, it’s okay for you? And I think they, uh, take care of some specific birds in an enclosed area and then kill them when they’re ready, so they never do run out.”

“Deer is still the best, but other meat is fine.”

 

My sister asked me many other questions about the elves as we walked, and I tried my best to answer them.

 

Soon enough, I spotted my home. “Mirefa,” I said.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Remember what I said about how to behave?”

 

“I know, I know. Don’t touch anything unless you say it’s okay, don’t break anything, yadda, yadda.”

 

“Good. Because that over there is where I live, and I really don’t want you to cause a mess. Also, see that elf?” I said, pointing to the window where Anortha could be seen studying. “She might get excited and try to hug you and stuff. You could avoid her advances, but please don’t see that as an attack and fight back. Got that?”

 

“Okay, okay. Anything else? I want to see what’s inside.”

 

“No, that should be it for now.”

 

“Finally,” my sister said as she jumped into the window that was at least two to three stories high.

 

Anortha screamed in shock at the sudden intruder, who knocked around a few books on the table. Anortha then screamed in delight and said, “How cute!” while hugging the intruder who evidently didn’t get to escape in time. 

 

Wondering if I made the wrong choice in bringing her over, I went through the front door, which was the intended way to enter the house. As I climbed up the stairs to Anortha’s room, I thought exactly how I should deal with Mirefa, and really, really hoped nothing would go too wrong.