Prophecy Approved Companion

"What do you mean?" Qube asked as the city guard and the Thieves Guild squared off against each other.

"You're not getting anyone to try and harm any member of our guild!" The leader growled, cutting off whatever the Chosen One had been about to reply.

"The duty of the city guard is to eliminate all vermin," the captain replied. "So, if we were to clean up around here, we'd just be doing our jobs."

“Wait, are they actually going to fight? That doesn’t seem right.” The Chosen One was, predictably, distracted from his conversation with Qube by the conflict unfolding before him. He wasn’t the only member of the adventuring party to be pulled into the drama.

"The rats' mutations seem to have made them intelligent enough to join the Thieves Guild," Definitely Bad Guy said, his eyes flaring red and blue as he examined the giant rodents. He slowly started circling around the rats, as was his habit when examining things, stepping past the bristling thieves. The former Mage Advisor completely ignored the fact that a large group of armed guards were threatening to kill the group of beings directly around him, so enraptured was he with his studies. "Fascinating."

"While I defer to you in all things magical and mutant, could this not be the result of them being exposed to [The Bard's Ballad]?" Sencha Bard asked with surprising humility from a safe distance, far outside the reach of both the city guards and the Thieves Guild. The glances he was sending to the human members of the guild were anything but humble, however. Qube hadn’t seen such venom peeking out since… well, since he’d last mentioned the Devs.

"A worthy question," Definitely Bad Guy said, nodding approvingly. "But we have seen many animals affected by [The Bard's Ballad] and only the creature designed as Boss showed this level of intelligence."

Sexy Screamy Spider Briar sucked in a sharp breath at his statement. She shifted slightly, allowing the mascot on her back to slide off and approach the centre of the Thieves Guild, where the Mage was working.

Squiggles wound her tentacles around the Mage's ankle. He didn't look down, instead continuing to address Sencha Bard as he added: "Naturally, creatures affected directly by the Healer's spells would show increased levels of understanding regarding the reality of the world they live in, which could present itself in the form of rapid learning."

Squiggles slowly started trying to climb Definitely Bad Guy. Not breaking eye contact with the Bard, he carefully pried her questing tentacle off his leg. A second tentacle took its place. This too was removed by his remaining free hand.

Which meant he had no hands free to stop the other six tentacles from latching on, allowing the sharktopus to climb up onto his shoulder.

"I object to this treatment," the Mage said stoically. His expression was scrupulously neutral as he continued to look straight ahead. With the tact and diplomacy he was known for, Sencha Bard didn't so much as flinch at the sight of his compatriot being swarmed by a happily drooling Squiggles.

Qube tugged on the Chosen One’s arm, drawing his attention back to her.

“Chosen One, please focus,” she said, mildly exasperated, but not at all surprised.

The Hero shook himself, and brought his attention back to the half-elf before him.

"I'm not having either of these idiots join us when we go to the castle. We don't need them tagging along and making a mess," the Chosen One said to his boon companion, gesturing to indicate both the thieves and guards. “We can do it on our own.”

“Who are you calling idiots?” the leader of the Thieves Guild interjected indignantly.

“Of course we’ll be joining you on your quest,” the captain of the city guard was distracted from her mission to eliminate all vermin from the city by the Chosen One’s strange declaration.

“Nope,” the Chosen One said firmly. “Neither of you are coming with.”

All animosity between the two disparate groups was temporarily put aside as they faced their new mutual foe: the Hero destined to save their kingdom.

“We are an elite group of guards dedicated towards the protection of this city!” the captain said, bristling in indignation.

“We have the right to try and protect our interests, same as anyone else living here!” The thief leader also bristled in just as much outrage as the captain. “There’s no way you’re gonna let these goodie two shoes hog all the glory and impose a bunch of new rules.”

“Just as there’s no possible reality in which these degenerates will be given free reign to destroy our peaceful way of life!” the captain retorted.

“Nah, you’re both missing the point,” the Chosen One told the two commanders. “Neither

of you are coming with us. You’ll just make a mess and die and then I’ll feel bad.”

As both groups flared, ready to continue arguing, the Hero raised a hand, forestalling them.

“Right, you, captain law and order,” he said, pointing at the commander of the city guard. “What’s your plan for helping us, then?”

“Naturally we shall storm the castle gate!” the captain replied instantly. “You can use us as a distraction while you sneak around the back, and solve the maze to the secret entrance to the castle.”

“Why does the castle have a secret entrance?” Qube asked, unable to help herself. “If it has a maze attached, then it’s not a secret.”

“The Evil Emperor doesn’t know of its presence. Its existence is a closely guarded secret entrusted only to those most trusted by the royal family, such as myself. He believes that it is a mere maze, and so has only a few guards patrolling it.”

“Why have any guards patrolling it?” Qube asked.

“All areas of the castle are patrolled, some more heavily than others,” the captain replied. “There are also many different types of traps, both physical and magical. Our hope is, by drawing attention to the front gate, he will divert his resources to it, and we’ll be able to hold off his troops long enough for you to enter the throne room and defeat him.”

“And you, chaos and crime lord,” the Chosen One said, pointing at the thief leader, who wasn’t a lord at all. “What was your plan?”

“Our scouts have discovered that the maze is actually a secret entrance to the castle,” the Thieves Guild leader said, somewhat sulkily. “So our plan was to divert the castle guards' attention to the castle gate and fight them there, allowing you to infiltrate the maze and go in through the secret entrance. You’ll have to be careful though, the castle is full of traps both physical and magical.”

“What does the secret entrance look like?” Qube asked, confused. It must have taken a very skilled Rogue to discover it, if it was supposed to be a secret known only to those the Royals trusted most!

“It’s a wooden trap door at the heart of the maze,” the thief seemed, if anything, even more sulky at imparting this information.

“Is it hidden under a bench or something?” Qube asked. Both the captain and the leader shook their heads.

So the trapdoor was just openly lying in the heart of a maze that was regularly patrolled. A maze that the Evil Emperor would have known about, and no doubt either explored to find the heart of (since that was, to Qube’s understanding, the point of mazes) or ordered someone to explore.

Far be it from her to criticise anything the Royal family ever did, but this secret entrance didn’t seem particularly well thought out.

“You see?” the Chosen One said, waving at the two parties. “Both of their plans are stupid. In fact, it’s not even two plans, it’s just one stupid plan.”

“Chosen One, don’t be so rude about their stupid plan! I mean, their plan!” Qube said, scandalised. “They’re only trying to help! Sure, it’s last minute, and poorly thought out, but that’s no reason to call it stupid to their faces!”

“So I should call it stupid behind their backs?” the Hero asked, amused.

“There might be intricacies to their plans that they haven’t explained yet,” the well-trained childhood companion said diplomatically. She looked at the two groups hopefully.

What she saw in their faces didn’t inspire confidence.

“Well, repay her faith in you,” the Chosen One said to the two leaders. “Are there any intricacies to your single shared plan that you haven’t mentioned?”

The two leaders, still united in their common goal of arguing with the Chosen One, looked at each other sheepishly.

“We were going to use smoke bombs,” the thief offered.

“We have a battering ram,” the city guard counter-offered. She gathered herself, and squared back her shoulders. “Either way, even if we fall, we are ready and willing to give our lives for this great cause!”

“Yeah,” the leader of the Thieves Guild said, drawing himself up. “Yeah! We’re willing to shed blood, theirs or ours, to stop this city from being strangled! For our freedom! We may be thieves, but there’s honour amongst thieves!”

“Not what that saying means,” the Chosen One said dampeningly. “But see, this’s what I’m talking about,” he said to Qube. “Either way, their plans involve getting killed by a bunch of troops while we sneak in the back. Whereas if we actually sneak in, they don’t need to be at the front.”

“There will be an overwhelming number of troops within the castle—” the captain started.

“Who we can deal with a lot better than you guys,” the Chosen One said brutally, before turning back to Qube. “I’m not into these kinds of stories. Don’t like them. Never have, never will. It’s pointless sacrifice for the sake of adding fake depth.”

Something about the way he was talking was faintly familiar to Qube. She could have sworn he’d said something similar to her before. But she didn’t remember this kind of intensity about stories.

At the word “stories”, Sencha Bard, who’d been subdued ever since Construct Crossroads, looked up at the Hero.

“We don’t need them to die to get into the castle,” the Chosen One continued. “And I guarantee you that they’ll die to attacks that we’d easily survive. And sure, they’d probably drop unique loot, but this close to the end point that’s not really as important.”

The entire party gasped at the Chosen One’s declaration.

“But Chosen One!” Qube said, moved almost beyond the power of speech. “You love loot!”

“I do,” the Hero said seriously. He put his hands on Qube’s shoulders. “But even unique loot isn’t worth killing a dozen innocent people and a bunch of maybe-sentient giant rats for.”

Qube was shaken to her core, rocked by the sheer weight of the Hero’s words. He had truly grown so much during their adventures together! She clasped her hands together and nodded, tears sparkling in her eyes.

“But surely it’s not your decision, whether or not these people choose to join us? How can you prevent them from doing what they wish? Will you force them to obey your wishes?” Sencha Bard, though obviously also affected by the Hero’s momentous shift in attitude, was still focused on his own train of thought.

“He can simply order them to stand down,” Definitely Bad Guy said. “If they are pledged to his cause, they will be compelled to do as he wishes.”

“We could always distract them before the big fight,” Sexy Screamy Spider Briar said thoughtfully, while standing directly in front of the people she was proposing to distract. “And use their distraction to tie them up, and leave them behind so they can’t hurt themselves.”

“But you’re still taking their agency away from them,” Qube pointed out. “They chose to fight with us, and they’re choosing to make this sacrifice, so shouldn’t we respect their wishes? It’s not necessarily for us to tell them how they can and cannot spend their lives.”

“Nah,” the Chosen One replied casually. “I ain’t gonna tell anybody what they can and can’t do. All I can do is control what I do or don’t do. Like this: Hey everyone!” he shouted to the two groups. “I ain’t gonna play ball with whatever plans you come up with.”

“You cannot stop us from doing our duty to the city. Even if you beat us, or tie us up, or break our legs, we’ll storm the castle as you enter the maze!” the captain bravely declared.

“Yes, us too,” the thief leader added, with slightly less conviction. “Obviously we’d prefer it if you didn’t hurt us, of course. No one mentioned any leg breaking. Normally we break the legs.”

“Again, you guys are all thinking way too simply,” the Hero said. “Especially cuz you should all now be thinking for yourselves. It’s simple: I’m gonna infiltrate the maze. If you lot try and storm the castle, or help me in any way, I ain’t gonna try and physically stop you, or compel you, or whatever. No, what’s going to happen is: I’m gonna stop trying to get into the castle, and walk away.”

Everyone murmured in confusion. The Hero continued:

“Yup, just plain old going to stop what I’m doing and go do something else. Maybe I’ll go to the inn and have a nap, or go for a walk around town or something. Don’t matter what I do; the point is, you’ll all die, and it won’t help me at all cuz I’ll be off doing something else, so it’d all be pointless. So you can all do what you want, but I’m also gonna do what I want. Plan accordingly.”

The Chosen One turned back to the party, and gave them a gleefully evil grin.

“And that, my friends, is called setting a mother-[fiddling] boundary.”